It's The Thing.

Devan Avin.

[professionalconman-da]

former-fairestofthem-all

I was feeling that, truly. Oh, of course! Sai and Kate and your sister…Kimberly, right? I know that. You may or may not have been missing out, all depends on your perception. If you’re anti or pro ice-sculpture. It would have been, hypothetically. I’m afraid I can neither confirm or deny such an image.

Good to hear! Good to… Uh, wow. I don’t think I’ve actually been asked that one yet. It- Of course I’m having a good time. I am a hostess after all. Gotta wave that Fairchild Flag until my arm’s tired out and even then… Uh, anyways. It was reflex, sorry. My mom’s friends aren’t quite so forgiving or forgetting as you’d think and they’re all entirely clued up. I’m grateful you weren’t so, don’t worry about it Devan.

Yes, actually. See, you’re more than just a hostess. Sounds like you’re part of the family if you know everyone’s names... either that or Kimbs has made an impression. Or my father. My perceptions don’t matter much since I’m not really either. I’ve just always wondered what would happen if they melted in the middle of a ceremony. Terrible.

If anyone has the worst time of anyone, I know from experience it’s usually the host. Things stolen and falling apart. Caterers unorganized and not giving a fuck. Maybe it helps with it being your entire family? Your mom’s friends. That explains it right there. Are they ever? I won’t worry about it if you won’t. I think you should be you.

[professionalconman-da]

hellobabybeaumont:

“Yikes, not even giving the poor gal a chance.”

“I’m no Prince Charming, Snow White.”

[professionalconman-da]

withoutxfaith

Faith kept swaying with Devan before pulling him further onto the dance floor. She wasn’t much of a show-off, but she knew what she was doing. “It’s fine, Devan. Let’s dance if you want to dance.” Her smile was pretty genuine for being surprised like that. “But only for this song and then we’re done. Okay?”

He was glad she wanted to keep dancing for two reasons. He lifted his hands in defense. “Whatever you say, Middleton. Even though I’m not sure how we’re supposed to stop after we start. I wasn’t kidding about those dance lessons.”

[professionalconman-da]

Class ended early so now I can finally get to replies.

[filthyrecklessgossipgirl]

What is Devan even doing with Faith? Thought he was into materialistic bimbos.

Aren’t you being a little unfair to Faith’s UES upbringing by saying she’s not materialistic? I mean, sure, she isn’t interested in trying on Gucci Sunglasses or getting her hair blown out, but she’s still tall, hot, and fit, draped in the finest designer clothes and surrounded by the richest of the rich. Sounds like a girl crying consumerist wolf to me.

And Devan? Well, Devan hardly seems like the type of guy to discriminate against a pretty girl with something to prove. If Faith is going to test out her new-found softer side on Devan, I’m sure he won’t complain. In a world of fast cars and insta-gratification, you should never underestimate the power of having a high-status beau on your arm.

[professionalconman-da]

                                      Is anyone else actually seeing this? Is she paying me a compliment? This must be that karma Father was talking about..

[professionalconman-da]

3, 6, 9, 12, 15

03. Sexuality: Straight06. Ideal mate: Probably someone materialistic and hot.09. Crushes: Layla and Mer12. Biggest fantasy: To be in a Fast and Furious movie.15. Best kept secrets: My collections. Oh and the fact I know everyone’s secrets before everyone else. 

[l-la-old]

Get to Know My Characters

[logantheluscious]

skelerory:

Is there a character you want to know a little more about? Well step right up and drop their name in my box–and I’ll tell you more about them. (Reblog to have folks do this for you) You’ll get to learn: 01. Full name: 02. Best friend: 03. Sexuality: 04. Favorite color: 05. Relationship status: 06. Ideal mate: 07. Turn-ons: 08. Favorite food: 09. Crushes: 10. Favorite music: 11. Biggest fear: 12. Biggest fantasy: 13. Bad habits: 14. Biggest regret: 15. Best kept secrets: 16. Last thought: 17. Worst romantic experience: 18. Biggest insecurity: 19. Weapon of choice: 20. Role Model:           

[archibaldgoldenboy]

Has- Has anyone seen Eleanor?

Waldorf. I mean, who else? Have you seen her? Eleanor Waldorf. Hm? Oh, no I’m quite alright thank you. You know how it is, the party might be in full swing but business never truly stops. Of course, I‘ll be sure to catch up with you later. [ He stares intently at his phone, trying to look as calm and casual as possible before jumping and looking back up. ] Sorry, you startled me.

How are you?

[professionalconman-da]

It’s okay, Howard. I’m not going to bite. 

I’m fantastic. How are you? You seem a bit frazzled.

[shafaiontherise]

“I can’t believe we, as a tax bracket, continue to pretend that the food at Socialista is good. Put me in touch with your party planners, people, I’ll send them a list of caterers who know more spices than table salt.”

[professionalconman-da]

“It is a bit quant, isn’t it? I’m glad I’ve never had to put together something like this.” 

[originalcuddlyporcupine]

Oh you were…

Well Ms Fitzherbert, if I manage to make it past the watershed then I’ll be sure to save you a dance. Doctor’s honour. Alright, you have a good night now, I’ll see you later. [ On her exit, he lets out a deep and worried breath. ] Mrs Vandekamp did warn me that would happen.

I… I should get a drink.

[professionalconman-da]

Why don’t we get a drink together? It would seem we both had to bare through too much of that.

[isabella-oftheball]

Listen Harold, we’ve been over this… Either you have the venue up and running by tomorrow or you’re not going to be able to afford to keep the wife and mistress happy. You understand? Alright, glad we could chat. Mhm, okay. Goodbye. [ Clicks off her hands free which she totally…doesn’t have in her right now. ] … Hi, sorry about that.

We were talking about your last vacation, weren’t we? There’s so many summering hot-spots and not enough months in the year. Either that or it was your outfit. You look just incredible and that is coming form me. I know incredible when I see it.

[professionalconman-da]

Why thank you, that is so kind. My husband picked it out for me. He has sort of an eye for beautiful things. We were talking about my lack of vacations, actually. My family doesn’t get around much, but I think we should. Do you have any places in mind?

[professionalconman-da]

mcntgomerysm

            ‘ sounds like something that’s been invented and served at a frat house, so no. ‘

“Absolutely has. You should try it with me sometime.”

[professionalconman-da]

hellobabybeaumont

“Ah, c'monn, she was lovely!”

“She was too eager and honestly... she smelled God awful.”

[professionalconman-da]

slovetts

              ‘ ——-the huge green man with the fists? ‘

“The drink, madam. Named after the hero of course.”

[professionalconman-da]

logantheluscious

“I… I honestly don’t know what you’re trying to say here. My um, wife would probably be much better at this as I highly doubt you mean the green, cartoon man. Rest assured, Mr. Amin, you musn’t be as old as me.”

“I’m 49, sir, though I know I must not look it. The Incredible Hulk is a drink and I don’t believe I’ll ever have the pleasure of drinking it to the capacity I used to. How are you Mr. Hunter? You look well.”

[professionalconman-da]

shinebrightlikea-sapphire

“Well duh… He’s like, enormous and green. Kinda hard not to know about. Just don’t tell my BF that I ever uttered those words, okay Mr. Amin? Lips sealed. Besides, you’re not old. Everyone knows who Mark Ruffalo is, c’mon.”

“It’s a drink, sweetie. I am definitely old. Call it a defining moment. It’ll be okay for me, but if I go out buying a keg and four-wheeler know it’s too late for me.”

[professionalconman-da]

the-agnes-andrews

“I can’t say I have, but it sounds delicious. Like it would give you the ability to get through anything. Even this evening. Uh-oh, did I say that out loud? Haha, whoops. What does it have in it? The drink, I mean?”

“I think you’ve got the best description for it. It’s Hypnotic and Hennessy. Not really for anyone younger than 25 I suppose.”