Id feel more feminine with third leg but apparently its not as easy as trading with my transfem homegirl
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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Mike Driver
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@profoundislandvampire
Id feel more feminine with third leg but apparently its not as easy as trading with my transfem homegirl
dear daddy god,
Where the hell is my knight in victorias secret? My princess in niche menswear? What the fuck man?
Amen
When my toddler watches tv i put on all the cool educational shit my parents didn’t give me because when i was her age i exclusively watched the jerry springer show and other such daytime television and a few years later i developed a pregnancy kink and would watch videos of women giving birth because no one was monitoring me and id pretend to be pregnant during playtime and that only stopped when my kindergarten teacher said things you show on yourself might happen to you and i was terrified of getting pregnant.
I feel more masculine with my thong on thanks for asking
Is it crazy that my only plans to pay for post secondary is land an internship, dont stop performing and let the universe provide?
Like dont say i didnt warn you when im an intergenerational icon
i love when im gay for men and straight for women but not as much as i love when im gay for women and gay for men
Im going to bring so much cool features back once I understand how the sexy wires in cellphones work.
Cant wait to do good for the children of tomorrow!
i HATE and i mean HATE when people start asking me if im trans like i JUST found out how can you tell?!?!
Ok maybe saying id like to dick down my homeboys as often as i do is a bit suspicious but they be out here all submissive and breedable!!!
you ever make a floorplan instead of updating your fic?
Was scrolling through my photos and here are my top screenshots from ao3
"humans cant even begin to fathom the colors a rainbow shrimp can see" (‘The ground beneath their feet’, afullrevolution [HP/TR, MB/HG] )
"Seeing clearly and consicously for the first tim as a ston is a bit like being shoved out of and airplane over Humantay Lake in Peru without knowing that one was possessed of a parachute. The veiw might be one of the most spectacular in existance, but one still belives they are about to die" (The ground beneath their feet )
"he seemed to regard the former curse breaker with bemused non-shallance" (‘The ground beneath their feet’)
"your all touchable in the end, all of you" (Freddie lounges, ‘This dangerous game’, MissDisoriental)
"True freedom of thought, Will, does not have its basis in what one thinks but rather in how one thinks it" (Hannibal lecter, ‘This dangerous game’, MissDisoriental)
"how do you maintain a garden on the run?" "...kill the people who would trample it" (Kakashi-gaara exchange, ‘Monsters made manifest’, ThatDamnKennedyKid)
“does that make me a ho? A pervert? A perverted ho?” (Naruto, ‘Dead last champ’, Yaman999)
"Youve been staring at him like theres four of him and they're all fantastic" (Gwen stacy to Peter parker [andrew garfield] whos thirsting over Michael Jones [Michael B Jordan, aka human torch in that one movie where the budget was clearly spent on getting Michael B Jordan on set] ‘Something about this project’, Lo0na_Jk
Honorable mentions:
the use of sister sons to describe Kili and Fili in ‘future as bright as snow’
Wilhelmina Freebush as Wills pageant name in ‘Mr.Congeniality’
"I will not stop, I will not apologize" from a comedy thing where a speaker is set up in public and someone says wild things, thought it was hella inspirational
Maybe i am crazy for that
A very normal post ok?..
Me at fan expo early last year with only the coolest person at the function.
(I’m itachi, I was told that 30 minutes in advance of arrival and I was lowkey clipped by my dad in this photo 😭)
did I ever tell you that I LOVE PIM PIMLING?!?
Omg that aside this whole day was crazy and highkey just a paid marketplace. Probably good for meeting new people and making friends if your an adult but for a teen it was kinda not for me. If i had friends there id be making new ones like crazy but i had no people and its hard to approach people for more than pics with your housecat of a dad as a hypeman.
I went with my dad who was obito and we kinda just took a bunch of pictures and explored he thinks we missed out by going on the last day and I have to say I agree because the people we wanted to see for autographs weren’t there :(
there was dnd but it was in session by the time we got there and we didn’t bother buying stuff because
a) it usually wasn’t worth it or not of interest to us (we don’t particularly collect or hang prints and the clothes were ridiculously expensive but fully understandable for the custom, high quality or handmade nature)
b) I was really looking for an excuse to spend money and that’s dangerous so I just didn’t.
Although the comics were a pretty decent deal the only reason I didn’t get any was that the first of every series was bought for some weird reason (the weird reason being it was the third day)
I still enjoyed it but I think our next event like that together will have to be heavily vetted by me because I refuse to walk circles looking at pretty things I won’t buy.
"i just thought you guys would like a watch party."
"pim, the episode doesn’t come out for another 11 hours."
CRYING THIS REMINDS ME THAT I HAVE A PHOTO OF ME AS ITACHI WITH PIM FROM MY FIRST TIME AT FAN EXPO
I love making my favourite characters that have no stuffers suffer! (More fic ideas, or well just one big one...)
{CLEARING MY DRAFTS AND FOUND THIS MONSTROSITY FROM LIKE.. HOLY SHIT THIS WAS MEANT TO BE LIKE THE THIRD POST OML, this is in refferendum to "DOG(BOY) SPLITS THE UNIVERSE" (yes title inspired by boy swallows universe)}
picture it decendants fic with poly feels but probably no real acknowledgment of that past I have a partner and sometimes we kiss our best friends in a sexy way and in a platonic way idk yet I just {just what? i just what?}
MCs are Carlos(ito my precious baby boy I love him so much and #ImissCameronBoyce) Mal, Evie, Jay, uma and harry. Don’t ask questions because I don’t have answers past I wanna write about grey universe Ursula and Captain Hook having an alliance (she doesn’t let the sirens sink his ships he doesn’t let his men harm magical creatures of the sea) and joint custody over their kids who are trauma bonded. {yippee?}
Everyone gets their own on brand trauma for their parents (I drag Disney hades because of Hannibal fanfiction but I love hades he’s like my favourite Greek god in this he’s just an absent father who treats his kid like a disciple/experiment) {this kinda divulged into a bigger universe where the gods are themselves across universes, just one guy with many faces, so i could use aspects of lore olympus hades and persephone in my story because i liked some of it but i will forever be mad over evil!apollo because not my apollo, not your apollo, thats not even apollo}
SPOILERS IF YOU WANNA READ THE FIC {this is still mostly true.... ok fully true i really want you to read the fic}
So Cruella, the actual villain, is synonymous with “dog breeder” in my head. She uses her dogs both as raw material for her fur projects and as income, selling her dangerous, highly trained breeds on the black market off the island. {because of course she does, magic aint shit if your just a normal dude} Her particular brand of training relies heavily on fear and corporeal punishment. Carlos was her “treat” for her husband, whom she considered, like she does most people, to be just another dog. {ok purr}
She really started as just a chill woman with a husband and a dream of a perfect little family on the Isle. the grief of multiple miscarriages slowly drove her mad. {insane lore drop} Carlos was finally born frail and sickly, and of course she eventually snapped. She tried again and again for more children. When her husband failed to get her pregnant with a replacement child (around six years after Carlos was born) she put him down like the pet she always considered him to be. {feeling less embarassed this is actually good}
Because her mind was so warped, she raised Carlos as a dog. In her mind this was protection from the cruelties of life. When he was finally forced into school and around other people she taught him only the bare minimum people skills and ordered him to play person in public. Carlos goes about life a dog in person skin. His ability to shift at will into a dog only made it more confusing for him. (Ofc he never revealed this to Cruella, he would 100% join her closet of coats)
The main three pulled him into their circle to protect him from people who would take advantage of his ingrained need to obey whoever he believed was stronger or more capable of harm. Though he never says it, the three of them are close to the pedestal his mother placed herself on. Not close enough to override the whistle, but close.
Fun fact: Carlos calls her Mistress instead of Mother.
Do you see the vision? Good, now let me make it worse. {ehehehhehehehehe}
Everosina or Evie, daughter of the Evil Queen, is raised as an aristocrat. She carries the expectations of a princess and heiress along with the pressure of having a beauty pageant mother. Her mother controls every aspect of her life and shapes even how she thinks and feels. Evie only has her friends because Maleficent is powerful which makes Mal a strategic ally. Jay is a good suitor because his father was a king. Carlos’ mother makes half of her mother’s favorite wardrobe pieces. The strange part is that Evie has no idea about any of this. If being obedient means she gets two meals a day she will gladly ignore anything suspicious and remain the perfect daughter.
She does not realize she is losing time, besides she can be forgetfull at times. She does not notice her makeup and other things being moved around, because shes always forgetting stuff anyways. She barely remembers nearly starving to death, probably something stupid like her brain trying to protect her. Carlos keeps sniffing her but Carlos has always been strange.
Fun fact!: Carlos knows Everosina’s secret. He can smell her. {look at this ho tryna be mysterious... is it working?}
Jahandur (tell me you cannot hear Jafar shouting this) {oh my god where the fuck did i get this from? if you think its off the alternative is jaylun and actually i think its hyphenated in my docs}
As far back as he can remember, Jay has always been on fire. The first time he reached for open flame his father he had been swiftly stopped by his mother and her gentle hands tended to the resulting burn. when she had died, because only death could tear her from him, he knew nothing more. if he sliced his finger on glass or skinned his knee the only care his father would give him was in cauterizing his wounds, to ensure they scarred. {ok edgelord} Later the whip of flames became his father’s chosen punishment for weakness. hesitation to sacrifice, poor performance of rituals, or unnatural thoughts about other boys. {oh yeah i forgot about that}
His father only smiled at him when the flames had cleansed whatever part of him he considered dirty. Even then the smiles were rare because Jay only saw his father during magic lessons. He had more privilege than his friends, he could eat as he pleased and leave as he pleased, as long as he returned and repented, letting the flames burn away his sins.
Jay wants his father’s approval so desperately that he swallows his discomfort about the perfectly obedient “servants.” He ignores the rising number of missing people. He ignores the knives and jewelry made of bone. He hates it yet his mouth stays shut and he wears it in excess with a sick sense of pride because his father had given them to him.
Then Carlos looks at him with those gorgeous knowing eyes and Jay feels shame gnawing at him until the burning heat of his father’s whip returns to his skin and made him clean again.
Fun fact!: Jay loves how Carlos soothes his burning. He wishes Carlos could lie in his arms all the time to keep it at bay. {need she mention the scent thing?}
Miremails (malice, you see what I am up to {undercover malice mizer ref}), or Mal, is raised by a mother who fully lives up to her namesake. Maleficent believes she does not need childish feelings or many feelings at all, so whenever something enters Mal’s life she removes it, even if “it” is a person. After losing friends to her mother’s cruelty, Mal takes a vow of silence to stop causing harm. Hades takes her as a disciple when she begs for help and he blocks her ability to speak.
Maleficent does not appreciate this and begins experimenting to see how well the block holds and whether it prevents Mal from screaming (It does not.) With Maleficents own magic dampened by the barrier, she creates a new form of power that feeds on the negative emotions of everyone around her. To maintain the supply she ruins lives on the Isle. She amplifies everyone’s misery and uses it to fuel herself.
When she begins teaching Mal she becomes strangely kind. Mal watches her draw power and realizes the truth. All of these people were once misunderstood. Her mother made them into what Auradon imagines villains to be.
Hades’ block on her speech loosens as she ages but she has forgotten how to talk which makes connecting with people difficult. Evie attaches herself to her immediately and the boys follow. Hades loves Mal for her devotion but, like many cruel gods, he enjoys watching her suffer and crawl to him for comfort. He withholds this comfort whenever he pleases and treats her as entertainment. He could teach her to draw magic, not just souls, from the Underworld, a force strong enough to end her mother and all the suffering, but Mal does not know this yet.
Fun fact: Mal knows her friends suffering is amplified and possibly entirely caused by of her mother’s influence. She cannot use magic without drawing from the same source which means she has an unwilling hand in it.
Uma {no it doesnt need to get the hadrian potter treatment. but now that i say hadrian.. naw it encroaches to much on hades territory}
Her mother Ursula keeps her until she is ten, using her as a personal everything, cleaning, cooking, and running errands. When Uma fails to show promise in magic Ursula declares her a waste of space and sells her to Captain Hook for grunt work. Up until now Uma has worn boys’ clothing and is treated as a boy or at least something close to one. This is when Harry {just harry, because the only other name is hadrian or harrison or henry, eugh} Hook enters the picture.
Harry hates his father’s legacy but there was a time he wore it with pride. He only realizes the truth when he sees that his luxury was built on the backs of vulnerable kids like Uma and on horrific crimes. Uma gives him the reality check when Hook assigns her as Harry’s personal servant. She breaks down from exhaustion and constant orders. Harry asks why she is upset because he thinks she's paid, Uma tells him she's not paid because she was bought, He doesn't believe her, She tells him to ask his father.
Hook proudly confirms it and says that is what it means to live this life. Harry is horrified and helps the workers escape (ok harriet... bad joke.{terrible fucking joke, i did however snigger wich is iroic considering im a} They succeed a few times until they inevitably get caught because Harry is still a child and children are prone to stupid mistakes. {hello elephant time to adress you, how would hook not have noticed the reduced amount of people at his beck and call, is the ship really that big? does he not have insiders?} Hook decides Harry can join the slaves like his mother before him and that he will just.. make a new heir. Uma apologizes and Harry tells her it is not her fault, they endure together and the crew is horrible to Harry because he used to be horrible to them. {yada yada itll make sense when you read the fic and i write the fic but until i finish this is a sneak peak}
Uma learns to use her magic from an older slave {omg old transgender (trust me this is lore relevant)} (Most of the slaves are men because the women are taken as prostitutes and they hide umas gender to protect her) Eventually Uma starts presenting female (cough cough puberty). Harry already knows but one day someone else finds out, telling hook, who forces her to be more feminine and tells her he will (56) make a new heir with her (14). Harry is like fahh no and gets pistol whipped. Anything further is telling wayyyy to much.
Fun fact: Uma has blue eyes.
Yeah guys I'm evil this is what I think about at 1am and yeah. {so yeah. Anyways i came out as genderqueer in a reflection for my most recent show i did as part of my theatre training, A midsummers night dream and it seemed right considering i was puck (one of two) and we had a whole discusion as a group on how they (faeries) had all the gender as well as all the sex. I only said it out loud twice ever before that because im a wuss and im convinced my parents will somehow find out im genderfluid or nonbinary or something and i added comentary on this instead of finishing my homework.}
Ovulation is a writers best friend and worst enemy (Profound poetry Pt 1)
Eyes like a {wo}man starved
I see mads everywhere.
I see him in shallow water and tidal waves.
In flickering flame and dying phone screens.
I see his eyes and nose in the construction worker on the train,
His lips in the man sitting next to him.
I see a man in a suit and think‚ Hannibal would wear that
I see hands longer than my dick *impressed*
I see those same hands wrap around me and caress me…
I tweak out because what the fuck is wrong with me?
This prison has mounted antlers and a hard drive full of fics.
The door is wide open, a hand is held out to me—not his, much too tiny.
I close it. I will not leave.
I love pee paw.
(Mind you I did this sober. On a public train. On full screen brightness. Beside some stranger. Because the guy across from me had the same eyes . I forget I wrote it periodically only to find it in my journal when I update it)