content warning: adultery, smut (brief details of penetrative sex and oral sex, daddy kink, dom/sub dynamic), murder, blood.
your small apartment is where he goes on his way home from work. you're the pretty thing he daydreams about in court. your pussy is where he finds his salvation.
everyday at 6.35pm, you're ready for him to arrive and use your body. docile, obedient, subservient. his perfect sitting doll.
"taking daddy's cock so well," he'd grunt into your ear as he fucks you into the mattress. "like the little slut i've trained you to be, huh?"
"yes, daddy," is your response every single time.
yes, daddy. anything for you, daddy. this pussy is yours, daddy.
but he never stays for long once he has filled you with his cum. he dumps his sexual tension into and onto you, before going home to his family. his wife. his son.
your mouth is trained to take his entire length. no longer do you fear his thick shaft taking up all the room in your throat. you know to breathe through your nose while he fucks your face, like the good little girl he wants you to be. you know how to play with his balls, making him growl while your clit throbs.
"such a good girl for me," he whispered into your ear one night after fucking your brains out, soft and sweet. stroking your hair, holding you close, kissing your cheek. "i love you."
that changed things.
"so, stay," you begged, clutching onto him tightly. "stay the night, daddy. please don't go."
a regretful sigh left his mouth, making your heart crack before his words could. "i'm sorry, doll. you know i can't."
you tried to be okay with it. you attempted to accept that half of him was all you'd ever get, and you did your best to convince yourself that you were content with that.
"you're so perfect," andy groaned while you rode him, his hands stroking your hips and playing with your tits. "such a perfect little fuckdoll for me, aren't you?"
"yes, daddy."
watching him leave started getting harder. spending the night alone in the bed that he had marked with his scent was cruel.
you couldn't take it any longer. you deserved more than half of him. having him to yourself was your right.
andy gets home earlier today, because you texted him telling him that you aren't at your apartment tonight. he's frustrated, and he really needs you, but his wife will have to suffice.
"honey?" he calls out as he opens the front door, dropping his briefcase in the corridor and walking through to the kitchen. "i'm home."
when he doesn't hear anything, he's confused. he was sure laurie had the day off work today.
"honey?" andy says a little louder, feeling uneasy at the silence he's met with once again.
the sound of a tap makes him stop in his tracks. he walks to the living room, where the noise came from, his heart dropping when he sees you.
you're standing over laurie's inanimate body. a deep red coats her chest and your hands, specks of it on your face. he can tell from the blood spatter that you had stabbed her, at least ten times.
his mouth runs dry, his skin pales. he doesn't know what to say. the only thing running in his mind is the one thing he's begging isn't true. "is she dead?"
your lips curl up into an innocent smile. the knife glistens under the light, the thick red liquid dripping onto the floorboards and seeping into the cracks.
Me and Mickey definitely arenât planning to take over a rather famous amusement park, if thatâs what youâre asking Mr. superhero. No need to arrest me, Iâm perfectly innocent.
Mhm, thatâs definitely not at all suspicious and I definitely wonât be paying attention to that
I donât doubt that, Iâm sure you can do a whole lot more to that man. Itâs indeed fun to have options though, so Iâll make sure youâll become an expert. đ
Me and Mickey definitely arenât planning to take over a rather famous amusement park, if thatâs what youâre asking Mr. superhero. No need to arrest me, Iâm perfectly innocent.
Mhm, thatâs definitely not at all suspicious and I definitely wonât be paying attention to that
Me and Mickey definitely arenât planning to take over a rather famous amusement park, if thatâs what youâre asking Mr. superhero. No need to arrest me, Iâm perfectly innocent.
Mhm, thatâs definitely not at all suspicious and I definitely wonât be paying attention to that
Me and Mickey definitely arenât planning to take over a rather famous amusement park, if thatâs what youâre asking Mr. superhero. No need to arrest me, Iâm perfectly innocent.
Mhm, thatâs definitely not at all suspicious and I definitely wonât be paying attention to that
Look who just got delivered to my humble apartment, my little niece and nephew!
@tj-hammond-anon and @james-bucky-barnes-anon have fun at your party! Iâll keep you updated on any and all news regarding your little prince and princess.
đŹđđ§đŁđđŁđđš || smut (oral m receiving, brief rimjob, sensual sex, oversimulation [but itâs not bucky this time đ]), ANGST!!, like seriously so much angst, heavy BDSM, blood (don't say I didn't warn you), whipping, bondage/chains (standing bondage? if that's a warning), pain kink, emotions (bucky's emotions, reader's emotions, my emotions, and probably your emotions)
new parts posted on thursdays (typically)! follow my reblog account to be âtaggedâ!
When you realized your true feelings, you truly considered calling it off.
For a thousand reasons, it would break your heart to end your professional relationship with James, but it seemed like the right thing to do. It wasnât fair to either of you when clearly real feelings were getting involved.
So, in a certain sense, youâd already decided to end it. But, in another and much more important sense, you had been putting it off for weeks now. There was never a âgood timeâ to do itâ you always seemed to struggle to find âgood timesâ to do things it just so happened that you didnât want to do. That was why you ended up going through with three more sessions, letting yourself live each one within the fantasy that you were quickly becoming addicted to.
The Boyfriend Experience. After all this time playing the game and wearing the heels and living the lie, you never thought youâd fall for it; but now you couldnât help but wonder if you were getting more out of James than he was getting out of you.
Speaking of what he was getting out of you, you smiled when you saw a notification of an email from Jamesâ but your grin of glee started to fall as you read what he really wanted.
I need more this week. Chains, preferably standing up. The crop, or a whip would be better if you have one. Something to break the skin.
Go hard on me, I can handle a lot.
It wasn't out of the ordinary for you, in fact it was much closer to your normal style with all your other clients. That was exactly what worried you about it: since when did James want what your other clients got?
This was a new feeling for youâ well, not new, but rare. The last time you felt this way, it was when you were about to go onstage to sing for the entire fourth grade and their families for your small (but not small enough) role in Seussical the Musical. It was like your stomach would sink until it hit your feet, like your head was buzzing with enough anxious energy to make lightning shoot out of your ears.
And although your body was reacting in a similar way, stepping up to face Jamesâ naked as the day he was born (presumably; you werenât there, after all) with his arms pulled up above his head by the shackles hooked to the ceilingâ was very different from stepping onto the school auditorium stage to sing The People Versus Horton the Elephant.
His eyes didnât look up to scan your body as you approached him, but you gave him a thorough glance as you slowly thread the end of the whip between your fingers. âYou want me to hurt you, James?â you asked, breaking the longest silence youâd had in a while.
He nodded, the long ends of his hair shaking a bit as he did it.
âUse your words,â you reminded him.
âYesâ hurt me, Mistress, please,â he answered dutifully.
âGood boy.â
But he didnât have the reaction to it that you were used to; because unlike before, he didnât believe you.
You traced the whip gently over his chest first, before suddenly hitting him once on his side; he winced, barely, but hardly reactedâ so you did it again. And again. And one more time, until you could see welts form alongside where his ribs were visible through his skin when he took a deep breath.
Hurting him was harder on you than you expected, or wanted. Certainly harder than you were prepared for. But you kept going, because it was your job. You hoped he didnât see the way you winced, too, when you hit him.
You went harder on his back, you figured he could take more there. He started to groan louder with each one, though it was still pretty quiet compared to the sound of the whip cracking and the shackles clinking above his head.
"Color?" you asked suddenly, breaking a tense silence.
"Blue," he answered quickly. More⊠you could give him more, but it might take something out of you.
You honestly sort of spaced out, because you knew it would break your heart to focus on this too hard. Of course it was a bit dangerous to not have your full attention on him in a time like this, but when had this not been dangerous?
You knew better than to get feelings involved, you knew it you knew it you knew it and you still couldn't stop yourselfâ and now here you were, beating the man you loved bloody, for money.
"Harder," you heard him beg, moaning loudly when you obeyed. "Fuck, more, pleaseâŠ"
You really let him have it: it was like you were moving on autopilot, like you did with everyone else. The noise he made was clearly that of a sob suppressedâ he needed to cry, but he was fighting it, wouldnât allow himself the release he needed.
It was another painful reminder that he wasn't everyone else. He was James.
âItâs okay,â you softened slightly to inform him, âitâs okay to cry.â
âWanna be strong,â he explained with a whimper.
âYou are,â you assured, âbut I wanna see you cryâ be my good boy and cry for me.â
He shook his head.
âTell me what you need," you requested instead.
âHurt me.â
You swallowed before answering. âWhy?â
âDeserve it,â he answered tensely. âDid bad things⊠hurt people. I need the painâŠâ
âYou want me to punish you?â you pressed.
âYes, please,â he sighed, closing his eyes. He looked exhaustedâ not underslept, though⊠something much deeper than that.
âWhat for?â you asked.
âEverything.â
âTell me what it is about pain that excites you, James,â you whispered.
âEverything,â he repeated, even more tense than before. âLike that it hurts. Like that if I ask, youâll stop.â
You tried to keep your face neutral as your heart twisted. âTell me who hurt you,â you requested, running your fingers over his scars.
âEveryone,â he whimpered. âEveryone but you.â
He protested with a whine when you reached to unshackle him.
âN-no, donât wanna stop,â he shuddered.
âI think you need to,â you explained.
âNo!â he yelped, scaring you slightly, before tightening his face and body as fear shifted to simmering rage: âNo. I need to⊠I need to learn to control it. I need to control it.â
You didnât understand entirely what that meant, but you pushed past your discomfort to give him what he was asking for as you lowered your arms and left his chains untouched. âGive me your color.â
âBlue,â he snarled.
âHow hard do you want it?â
âWanna bleed.â
And he did. The first drop that rolled down his back made you grimace, another made your eyes sting until you had to sniffle slightly and hoped he wouldnât hear you on the verge of crying.
It wasnât the sight of blood itself that disturbed you, in fact it sometimes soothed or grounded you. But it was his blood, it was his pain, and you were crushed with the truth that love is not pain. That love is not suffering. And that you never want to hurt the person you love, even when he asks you to.
Some dominatrix you were; Love had transformed you, softened youâ and, you feared, ruined you. You wouldnât be able to give him what he needed anymore. He would leave. You would be alone.
So you kept hitting him, watching the cuts line his back in stripes, hearing his yelps and growls as he tried to keep from crying. If only he knew that you were probably trying even harder than him.
You let up on his back for a moment and suddenly his chest; that mustâve been what pushed it all over the edge, because finally, the tears started to fallâ slow at first, then a rush. To your surprise, they were his. âColor?â you asked quietly.
âGreen,â he whispered huskily between sobs. At least he didnât say âblueâ again.
You hit him again and heard him cry a bit harderâ it took a lot but he was finally letting go and letting it out. Each impact pushed another sob from his chest, especially a hit on his thigh that seemed to catch him off-guard. He threw his head back and shut his eyes tight, breathing through his clenched teeth. When he gasped and whimpered and shuddered after every crack of the whip, you could see on his face the way it melted his defenses away. He wasnât wrong before, he clearly needed the pain, and he clearly needed to cry like this.
That said, you couldnât push him much harder than you already had; you had limits, too, and youâd broken enough of your own rules for a while.
"You've had enough," you decided when tears covered his face and wounds decorated almost all of him.
"N-no," he whimpered.
"I said you've had enough," you repeated firmly, though you softened out of your dom voice immediately and reached up to the metal around his wrists. "I'm gonna take you out of these, okay?"
Finally, finally, he nodded and you began to unlock the shackles on his wrists.
He crumpled into your arms the second you released him, his limp weight requiring all your strength (and then some) to get him onto the bed where you tried to set him down but he instantly pulled you on top of him.
âJust hold me,â he pleaded in a whisper, his hand clenching as he grabbed at the back of your dress; you were glad his eyes had fallen shut so he wouldnât see yours water.
âNeed to take care of you first,â you explained as you slipped away to the bathroom, dampening a rag and grabbing some hydrogen peroxide from your cabinet.
Gingerly, and with as much precision as you could muster, you tended to his cuts and wounds.
âMight sting a bit,â you warned before you dabbed at him with the hydrogen peroxide. He winced but said nothing, letting you patch him up. You caught him looking at you while you did it, his eyes moving from your hands to your face and back. In a moment where your curiosity overpowered your respect for his privacy, you blurted out the question that had been burning in your mind since this all started: âIs this what you really wanted?â
He didnât seem to understand, or at least he was pretending not to.
âDid you really just want to be cared for, and the only way you knew how was to be hurt first?â
This time, he must have understood, because his jaw tightened and he looked away. You set your rag aside and rested your hand on his chest, pulling him into you.
âItâs okay,â you whispered, âIâm here. I care. Youâre safe.â
Until the exact moment that his arms wrapped around you, you thought youâd done something wrong. But he gave in and embraced you tightly, his body nearly enveloping yours at this point. The skin on his back was cool to the touch and you frowned. âBaby, you must be freezingâŠâ
You didnât even notice the casual pet name youâd called himâ normally you stopped that kind of talk when the scene ended.
But, normally you didnât fall in love, soâŠ
The two of you just held each other for a while, and it made you hopeful that you could still give him something he needed even if you had lost your ability to beat him up. You found yourself idly playing with his hair, before he suddenly rolled away and laid back on the bed, closing his eyes. "God, I'm so stupid," he sighed.
"Shh, don't say that," you frowned, reaching forward to keep combing his hair with your fingers and even hold his face for a moment.
"It's true,â he assured. âYou're like this with everyone⊠it's not real."
You stopped moving, unsure how to respond. "I don't⊠I don't do this with anyone else."
He breathed out quickly; almost like a laugh, but not quite. "You don't need to flatter me. It's okay. This is your job."
You sighed a little as you sat up, guiding him to do the same until he sat at the edge of the bed and you carefully got on top of him, straddling his legs. It reminded you a bit of the first session you had with him, and shocked you with how much has changed since then.
You searched for words as you held his face in your hands, but where you looked for words you just found feelings, and desires. For once, you let yourself act on one. Gently, hesitantlyâ tenderlyâ you leaned closer and pressed your lips to his. Your eyes fell shut first, and you felt his lips reciprocate your subtle movements at the same time that his fingers brushed over your back.
Butterflies⊠you hadnât felt these in a while. You hadnât gone into something not knowing how it would go in years, probably. It made you nervous, fuck, it made you terrified, but you loved it. You kissed him harder, you moved your hands to his shoulders, you sighed slightly when you felt him pull you closer.
You were disappointed when he pulled away, but that quickly faded as he started to kiss your neck instead; you couldnât remember being this sensitive here before, but right now it made your toes curl inside your heels. âIs this okay?â he asked against your skin.
âYes,â you sighed, almost moaning it out, âanythingâs okay, JamesâŠâ
That seemed to surprise him, understandably. âAnything?â he asked in a whisper against your skin.
âWhatever you need,â you clarified. âDo you need to feel good?â
He hesitated before noddingâ you felt it against your neck, along with his sighâ but you used his hair to gently guide his head away from your back and up to look at you.
âLet me spoil you,â you offeredâ oh who am I kidding? You were begging him for it. âLet me make you feel good. No pain, no torture, no denial. JustâŠâ love, you wanted to say, but you stopped yourself. âJust pleasure.â
His mouth fell slack but he said nothing as he nodded slightly.
You smiled as you gently pushed him to lay back on the bed and began kissing down his chest, taking the time to lick over the fading marks that youâd left on his body. He healed quickly, youâd noticed, and he seemed to begrudge it considering how he always wanted more bruises to take the old onesâ place. You hoped he wouldnât want that anymore.
It was nearly silent, but you could just barely hear his breath catch when you circled a nipple with your tongue, his skin pimpling into goosebumps. You didnât stay with it very long, too excited to move lower to where his cock was leaking and bobbing against nothing.
Your instincts told you to tease him for it, mock his eagerness, but that wasnât what you wanted to do today. It didnât mean you had to stay silent.
âLove how hard you are for me,â you praised instead, looking up at him from between his thick thighs. âWanna taste it, Jamesâ wanna taste you.â
You didnât wait for permission, because the stunned look on his face combined with the precum leaking out of his slit seemed like approval enough. Wrapping your hand around the base of him, you moaned a little as you stuck your tongue out and pushed his head against it, savoring the taste along with the way his body jerked a little.
âTastes so good,â you hummed, âfuck, I want moreâŠâ
You closed your lips over the head and swirled your tongue as you sucked; you savored it, something you didnât usually get to do when you had to keep part of your attention on how best to tease and edge him. You took him deeper with every bob of your head, and though you mostly kept your eyes closed in order to focus on the weight of him on your tongue, you opened them for a moment and caught a glimpse of him clutching the sheets in his fists at his sides.
You stopped only to look up at him with a small smile. âYouâre not tied up anymore⊠you can touch me,â you reminded him.
âO-okay,â he stammered, sighing slightly as you got back to it.
He was hesitant as he reached out and brushed his hands over your face, your hair, your neck, while you slowly bobbed over his length again. But you could tell heâd wanted to do this every time youâd sucked his cock. If anything, you were a little surprised he didnât just grab your head and fuck your throat right there. You wouldnât have minded, but it made your heart sing when all he did was caress your jaw while you continued your work, running his thumb over your hollowed cheek.
You pulled off of him with a pop! and a smile, lowering your head to lick and suck his balls a bit until he shivered under you. Your tongue laved over whatever you could reach, your eyebrow raising as you had an idea.
"Can I put my tongue somewhere new?" you asked gently, letting the tip venture a little bit lower so he'd hopefully know where you were referring to.
"Oh," he sighed, like the wind was knocked out of him just from your words, "um, yes, pleaseâŠ"
You smiled and pushed his legs up slightly, just enough that you could lean down and slide your tongue between his cheeks, both of you groaning when you circled his sensitive rim.
That pretty face turned pink, tossed back in pleasure⊠it was a sight to behold. It made need pang between your legs, your insides clenching around nothing. You lapped at it eagerly for a little while, still using one hand to stroke his spit-slicked cock.
âMistress,â he blurted out at one point, somewhere between a moan and a sigh and a sob. It made you smile around your extended tongue; it also made you sit up and look down at him proudly. You knew what he wanted next, but you also knew he was too afraid to ask for itâ so you asked instead.
âCan I ride you?â you requested quietly.
âPlease,â he groaned, and not one to make him wait (anymore), you quickly hopped up to straddle his legs while he sat upright again. He pushed your dress up your thighs and over your hips while you carefully pulled your thong aside, before you lowered yourself onto him as you both sighed in relief.
âYes,â you moaned, your head falling back as your hips met his. âOh⊠oh my god, Jamesâ so good, you feel so good.â
He made a sound you thought you mightâve never heard from him before. It had that weak, sobbing quality to it like a lot of his moans did, but this time it was less shaky, less desperate, with confidence around the edge instead. He reached up and held your hips, guiding you at the pace he wantedâ and you loved that he was finally learning how to take pleasure from you after heâd taken so much suffering.
âFuck,â he groaned, and when your name tumbled from his lips, he suddenly glanced to you as if he was afraid youâd be upset for not saying âMistress.â But you smiled down at him and carded your fingers through his hair, kissing him again while you rode him faster. It was a needier kiss than before: hungrier, less delicate, and you moaned into it when his hand found the back of your head and pulled you deeper into it.
The pleasure had you tempted to throw your head back, but the kiss kept you bent down towards him. When you tried to bounce up and down, the metal hand on your hip kept you held tight and close, until all you could do was grind back and forth on him. Not that you minded thatâ it made your clit rub up against him and it made you both breathe heavily into each otherâs mouths.
âJames,â you whispered.
âYeah?â he answered.
âI just wanted to say it,â you smiled. But he was very serious as he said your name back to youâ dead serious, even, and it made your heart clench in the right way, for once.
You could come like this, honestly, and it wouldnât even take you much longer⊠but you had better ideas, so good that you couldnât help but blurt it out.
âDo you wanna get on top?â you asked, smirking slightly.
The conflict was obvious on his face: he was afraid that if you gave him any control, heâd take all of it. How ironic that for everything youâd done to him, he was so terrified to hurt you. But you understood. âI donât⊠I donât know if Iâm ready,â he mumbled.
âItâs okay if youâre not,â you relented, âbut I think you are. I think itâll feel so good to be under you, to let you do whatever you want to me. I think itâll feel so good to be yours, James.â
He sucked in a breath through his teeth, and you felt his cock flex inside you. For a moment you thought heâd shake his head and tell you to keep riding him, but instead he quickly flipped you onto your back and hovered above you. âYouâre sure?â he whispered.
âFuck me,â you instructed, hoping a brief venture into your dom voice would get him to do what you knew he wanted to.
He was still slow and measured with it, more than you expected, but it felt fucking amazing to be caged in by his body and open wide for him.
âGod, yes, just like that,â you encouraged, âfuck youâre so good, baby, your cock feels so fucking goodâŠâ
You loved the way your praises made his cock flex and his mouth fall into a gasp: so you kept going.
"My perfect boy, fucking his Mistress so goodâ I'm so proud of you, baby," you purred.
"Fuck, Mistress," he sighed, dropping his head onto your chest. "Mistress, Mistress, MistressâŠ" he chanted under his breath
"That's it, keep going, baby," you moaned, gasping when he suddenly slammed right into your spot. His head popped up again as he smiled at you.
"There?" he realized.
"Yes," you hissed. He gave you a hard, sudden thrust that made your legs quiver.
"There?" he repeated, grinning proudly.
"Yes," you answered again, though it was really more of a plea for more than it was a real response, made even more clear when you compulsively repeated it with every one of his movements. He held himself up with one hand as he hastily pulled your dress down with the otherâ when it didnât give way easily, he growled and quickly ripped it. You gasped, though you smiled too, and he ignored it completely as he dove down to suck on your exposed breasts. âFuck,â you moaned, even louder than you expected to.
He moved faster, fucked you harder, pushed you deeper into it until pins and needles started to spread over your body, forewarning of the onslaught of sensation that was about to hit you.
You bit down on your lip to try not to get too loud, but stopped when James suddenly kissed you again. You moaned into it, wrapping your legs around his hips as he gave you all of him with every thrustâ and all of him was a lot to take, but you had been drenched and ready for it the second you had his cock in your mouth.
âYou feel so good,â he whispered into the kiss, his words almost lost against your lips. âYou feel so fucking good, how do you feel this good? Fuck, youâre perfectâŠâ
Not true, but hot anyways.
âSo tight,â he groaned, âI canât believe I fit inside you, Mistress, but I do⊠feels like weâre made for each other.â
Of course that would be the thing to push you over the edge, sooner than either of you expected. âJames!â you yelped as you reached your peak, back arching and legs quivering.
âDid you just come?â he asked, as if it wasnât extremely obvious. Your eyes fell shut but you nodded through the haze and bit your lip. âThink you can do it again?â
âFuck,â you sighed, eyes shooting open again to see his smile as he looked down at you. âYouâre always full of surprises, arenât you?â
âWanna make you come as many times as you made me come,â he explained.
âWeâll be here a while,â you chuckled.
âYou have no idea,â he smirked, leaning in and kissing your neck softly. âIâm including every time I got myself off at home, thinking of you, remembering how good your body feels, remembering how I love being your good boyâŠâ
Ironically, the words âgood boyâ seemed to do more for you in that moment than him; you purred through a grin, writhing slightly beneath him, but he pulled another gasp out of you when he pulled your hips up into the angle he wantedâ which was, apparently, the angle that pushed his cock so deep that you choked on your own breath. âOh fuck!â you gasped, feeling him smile wide against your shoulder before he bit it softly.
âYouâre close again already, arenât you?â he noticed.
You werenât used to him being cocky (though it was still pretty soft, certainly not taunting), but you didnât really mind itâ especially since he was right.
Of course you'd always known how hard overstimulation can be on someone, you wouldn't subject your clients to something you didn't understand. But it was so different with James bringing you to the edge over and over, sending you into a seemingly-endless series of orgasms. After a while, each one was starting before the previous had even fully ended, overlapping pleasure making your head foggy and your body numb.
"Is this good?" he asked you as he breathed heavily, so oblivious it was almost funny, but you werenât in the mood to laugh.
"So good," you growled, "so fucking goodâ my good boy."
"Fuck," he sobbed, "gonna come. Can I?â
It was sort of cute that he still asked. âInside,â you pleaded, âcome inside me.â
He groaned and fucked you faster and deeper, pinning you under his weight with each brutal thrust.
"Are you mine, James?" you asked between failed attempts to catch your breath.
Umm⊠okay so I had this on my mind for so long and⊠I think Iâm in love with you and I canât keep it a secret any more (maybe you can make it a threesome? âwinks seductivelyâ