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Janaina Medeiros
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Mike Driver
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tannertan36
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Three Goblin Art
Jules of Nature
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almost home
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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JBB: An Artblog!
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@prussiansuggestions
You still posting?
Hi! Good question, I had bit of a busy spell at uni (and in life in general), but I’m back and kicking now! Also because what better backdrop for jumping back into posting about our favourite swamp state than a global plague
It’s been about six (?) days and I’m already 40% of the way into an essay crisis, so instead of doing my Anglo-Saxon archaeology reading, of course, have the above as a testament to my lack of work ethic. So far all uni has taught me is that a) the English truly do not salt their food, b) “I’ll just skip bringing a raincoat” I’m an idiot, c) I have no idea how to write an essay and yet this is apparently what I’m doing now? Wild. If in one week I ask why I got 30 on my essay then please remind me of how I typed this while singing along to Dschinghis Khan
Everyone has weird family history tidbits, but a supposed ancestor on my father’s side designed some porcelain figures with wobbly heads that Frederick the Great was so amused by he bought ten and put them on display in SanssouciÂ
They are still in the Chinese House these days, apparently positioned directly in front of windows by Fritz himself so the wind would truly showcase them in all their 18th century-bobblehead glory, which is the kind of attention to important detail you look for in a monarchÂ
One of my however-many-times great-grandfather Sir Charles Isham brought the first garden gnome to England in the waybackwhen. There’s a rockery in the back of the house that he set the gnomes up in, in such amusing arrangements such as
working the mines and
The first recorded gnome strike.
So the next time you come face-to-face with one of these cheerful little horrors, thank my people. Or curse them. Either way works, really.
Don’t you just love The Original? Absolutely nightmare inducing.
Both brilliant and absolutely terrifying, I thank your great-etc.-grandfather
An East Prussian guide to child bearing
Stealing during pregnancy = Your child will be a thief
Going to consume food or drink at another person’s house = Your child will be a freeloader
Looking at ugly things = Your child will be ugly, unless you look at said ugly thing very closely and intenselyÂ
Going to a zoological garden = Your child will end up looking like whatever animal you’re regardingÂ
Looking at a corpse or attending a funeral = Your child will either die or be pale or have eczemaÂ
Eating apples / pears = Your child will either have a round or an oval-shaped head
Looking after a funeral procession = Your child will be shortsighted
Touching your own skin after something startled you, or you saw a mouse, or a spark flew into your face = Your child will end up with various types of birth marksÂ
Looking through a crack or a key hole or into a bottle = Your child will squintÂ
Crawling through a fence = Your child will either be disabled or fond of climbing or have a wide forehead or be a thief
Don’t despair though, should your offspring turn out less aesthetically pleasing than you anticipated, there is always the option of claiming the actual child has been kidnapped by dwarves and maliciously replaced with an uglier incarnation.
An East Prussian guide to child bearing
Stealing during pregnancy = Your child will be a thief
Going to consume food or drink at another person’s house = Your child will be a freeloader
Looking at ugly things = Your child will be ugly, unless you look at said ugly thing very closely and intenselyÂ
Going to a zoological garden = Your child will end up looking like whatever animal you’re regardingÂ
Looking at a corpse or attending a funeral = Your child will either die or be pale or have eczemaÂ
Eating apples / pears = Your child will either have a round or an oval-shaped head
Looking after a funeral procession = Your child will be shortsighted
Touching your own skin after something startled you, or you saw a mouse, or a spark flew into your face = Your child will end up with various types of birth marksÂ
Looking through a crack or a key hole or into a bottle = Your child will squintÂ
Crawling through a fence = Your child will either be disabled or fond of climbing or have a wide forehead or be a thief
Did Frederich Wilhelm I have a hidden thing for tall men, or was he just over compensating?
Well, we can’t really know for sure, but just the knowledge that he’d absolutely resent being accused of having a “thing for tall men” makes me want to propagate that theory. Then again, he was a very militaristic person, and being 160 cm tall while supposedly also suffering from gout that left him dependent on a wheelchair in later years probably didn’t really lend itself to the imposing monarchic image he was trying to project. I honestly wouldn’t put it past him to try and compensate for that with particularly imposing (if impractical) soldiers. So, probably overcompensating, but maybe a combination of the two?Â
Make sure there’s an army before there’s a country.
And don’t forget to make sure your army includes a disproportionate amount of people over 1.88 meters, for purely aesthetic reasons that in no way translate to military usefulness
Is this historical self-consciousness?Â
Hello all my troubles are over this was the best day ever
When will my satanic rituals work to bring Fritz back.
When will my habit of standing in a potato circle chanting about dogs succeed in summoning himÂ
Have you been chanting in German or English??
German, mainly, though I occasionally throw in some “chiens” which is the full extent of my FrenchÂ
When will my satanic rituals work to bring Fritz back.
When will my habit of standing in a potato circle chanting about dogs succeed in summoning himÂ
A few months ago I had an awful realization. We only know about much of the ancient world due to clay and stone tablets.
Paper tends to gradually degrade, and the internet might not be around forever.
So, I have elected to undertake something of a project.
Cataloging the internet on clay tablets.
This is very rough, and I may try to use wooden stamps instead of the screwdriver I wound up using.
But I wanted to gauge interest. Writing down whatever you want and mailing it to you. Or burying it maybe for future archeologists.
Maybe it’s dumb, but I had fun doing it!
If you’re interested hit me up!
needs to be more square
godspeed
I remember having a conversation about Frederick the Great with my history teacher, who mentioned that one of his uni professors was so obsessed with Fritz, that he was digging deep enough to find some German sources not available to other mortals. One of the things he found was the fact that Frederick was said to love spinach and that it was his favorite dish. Can any of you, fellow Prussian history fans, confirm that?
A quick consultation of my unscientific gossip-y sources has taught me that Frederick was indeed very fond of spinach, as well as of peas, pickles and all sorts of cabbage. His favourite dish, however, was apparently some sort of stuffed white cabbage, ominously titled “Bombe de Sardanapale” (described as physically and mentally taxing by a German newspaper which attempted to recreate it), which he enjoyed so much he wrote a 137 verse ode to his cook.
I don’t know who did this, but my local tattoo shop has an example picture of a guy who got a quite extensive tattoo of Ludwig II of Bavaria’s head on his leg and I kink-shame whoever thought this was a good idea
A cursed image and also the answer to the question “how could the experience of watching someone zip-off the legs of convertible cargo pants be made even worse?”
Bavarian royalists, remembering Ludwig II: The one true king, glorious representative of the good old days in which the magnificent Kingdom of Bavaria rejoiced in its independence from the despotic Prussians, should be eternalised in tattoo-form on every available limb
Literally everyone else: Ludwig II, memorable due to his supposed arrogance and melancholy, might have had a personality disorder, probably should not have spent quite that much time, effort and money financing Wagner’s exploits, would have probably bankrupted the Bavarian state had he succeeded in his attempt to build a motorised peacock-shaped flight object with which to glide across the Alpsee
I don’t know who did this, but my local tattoo shop has an example picture of a guy who got a quite extensive tattoo of Ludwig II of Bavaria’s head on his leg and I kink-shame whoever thought this was a good idea
A cursed image and also the answer to the question “how could the experience of watching someone zip-off the legs of convertible cargo pants be made even worse?”
I don’t know who did this, but my local tattoo shop has an example picture of a guy who got a quite extensive tattoo of Ludwig II of Bavaria’s head on his leg and I kink-shame whoever thought this was a good idea
