Jump into the Fog

I Do

svifa:

pryzhok:

Valery was there saying it wouldn’t come true, assuring him he could have what he’d been banished from finding, and it was reassuring. It really was. All the affection coming from the older man was more than he ever expected to get, and he was all too willing to push into each and every bit. “My… my father didn’t like th-things to go h-how he didn’t like.”

Alex went exactly how he didn’t like, and the one thing he didn’t hear from his new fiance was that he thought he could fall in love. It was too much to ask, he knew, and he didn’t want to hear the answer. This was arranged. There wasn’t meant to be that kind of love here, there didn’t even need to be any love at all. This affection… this care he didn’t think he could live without would be enough forever.

Sobs were attempted to be controlled as best he could, choking them down with a more success than before. They were replaced with a tiny smile, watery but happy. “…what about you?” He reached up, fingers twining in blonde hair to play with the bouncy looking strands. “I don’t want to be alone, but… but is there something I can do to help make you happy, t-too?”

“Well your father can be the grown man he claims to be and get used to not having things go his way.” Honestly, the man wasn’t a child. Throwing a fit because his son wasn’t how he wanted just made Valery hate him and want to show him even more how wrong about everything he was.

Gentle fingers stroked all over that sweet little face that he wished so badly he could see. “I can’t promise I’ll fall in love. Or that you will. But I can promise that I care, and that I will do my utmost to make this life with me a happy one, Alex. You’ll never be sort of anything. Food, shelter, affection... the touch of someone holding you close.” All of those he could and would give without hesitation.

More soft kisses were pressed to his eyes, his cheeks. Hands in his hair was nice, and he smiled softly. “I don’t want to be alone either. I’m sure... at least you know about the family situation here. My father is dead. My mother is hospitalized... this is a big house for just me.”

I Do

svifa:

pryzhok:

No attention was paid to the movement of the body pressed tight to his, no eyes peeking open to see where they were going. Valery could go wherever he wanted and in that moment Alex would trust him with everything he had. Perhaps the sentiment wasn’t the most permanent or the most logical… he didn’t care. At the moment this was the man that cared about him and looked after him.

When they were settled and he was more in Valery’s lap than clinging to his waist, he pulled away enough to look up at the man he’d been promised to. “…my f-father wanted…” Come on, hang on to coherency long enough to talk. “…to give me to a man th-that wouldn’t love me.” Make him miserable for his whole life, neglected and alone save for the unending silence of a home too big for him.

“…I don’t kn-know if what he wanted will come true or not, b-but…” Hands lifted to cup the cheeks of the one making it impossible to breathe correctly. “I’m glad he gave me to you.” Because whether or not he could actually be loved, Valery was kind. He cared. There would be no loneliness here, not in the beginning. His father was unintentionally giving him the chance to be happy.

Valery rocked gently, pressing gentle kisses to Alex’s head the whole time. Something... sympathetic rose up along with something angry. He was holding his brand new fiancé in his arms, not even an hour had passed, and the man was in tears because he hadn’t been shown this kind of kindness. He wasn’t expecting any kindness.

What sort of man would raise his child to feel that way?

As he tried to speak once more, the older held him closer, tighter. “Your father is cruel, and doesn’t deserve to have such a sweet son.” At all. Gentle fingers carded, lips rarely ceased in dropping affection to that sad, sobbing man. “I don’t know... who wouldn’t be able to love you, Alex.”

“It won’t come true.” While he couldn’t promise he would fall in love with Alex or vice versa, this man deserved all the care and love in the world. “I won’t let you be alone... or go without the care and affection that you’ve been so sorely in need of.” Gently, he tipped up Alex’s tear-streaked face to press kisses to the corners of his eyes.

I Do

svifa:

pryzhok:

Alex was pliant in the hands that lifted him, his much smaller body pressing close to the one bent on holding him. The hand pressed to his mouth was already soaked in the tears streaming down his cheeks, dampening the pristine shirt of his perfect fiance. Even now Valery wasn’t changing, focusing entirely on him and his comfort rather taking the easy way of forcing Alex to stop or leaving him alone.

Hands moved to cling to Valery, fingers curling into fabric and face pressing into the older man’s neck. “I-I didn’t thi-think I could ev-ever be ca-cared about like th-this.” Why, why was talking so hard? This was unfair. Valery was being nice to him, holding on to him, totally okay with Alex and his clingy nature. In fact, he was encouraging it. Helping him hold on with all his might.

“I don’t wa-want to be a burden.” He wanted to be loved, whether or not it was romantically. “I wa-want to… to be a-able to be with you.” Just Valery, this man who was seeing to comfort Alex didn’t know he needed this desperately until the prospect had been stolen from him. Getting things across right now wasn’t going to happen, so he settled for re-burying himself in Valery’s neck so he could cry as quietly as he could without being watched.

Valery held him close, stroked through his hair and pressed small occasional kisses to his head. This man had clearly suffered at the hands of an unfair family, and it made him simply more glad to have agreed to the whole thing. That meant that he was free of shackles now and could actually start having a life that wasn’t miserable. Hopefully.

“Of course you can. You deserve care just as much as anyone else, Alex.” Once the younger was properly holding on to him, he started to walk again. Carefully up stairs and down the long hallway he carried his sobbing fiancé until large doors could be nudged open to his bedroom, and he could bring Alex and himself to sit on the couch over by the window.

“You’re not a burden, and you’re not going to be.” Seated on the couch with Alex firmly in his lap, he was able to hold him better, press more solid kisses to his temple and forehead. “And you can stay with me always if that’s what you want. I won’t turn you away.” They were in this together and they would stand by one another.

I Do

svifa:

pryzhok:

Silence was what came from Alex at first, mouth dropping slightly open from the words bouncing around his head. “…you’d let me never talk to him again? At all?” That was a bloody miracle. People didn’t just do something like that for no reason when they didn’t have the reasons. “Th-that worth must have been amazing for you to want me and be so nice.”

His free hand lifted, clamping over his mouth as the words finished passing his lips, hiding the tremor starting to overtake both lip and word. Heat was already pooling no matter how hard he was trying to fight it, leaving Alex to just try and choke back the emotions rapidly rising within him. The strain that he’d found heaped on him in the past weeks and the things happening now were too much.

“I-I’m sorry.” The hand in his was squeezed back, the action easier than trying to talk around those things he was trying to choke down. Cling to Valery he certainly was, even if it wasn’t in the way the man had intended. “I can… I can stop.” Just give me a minute. How else was he supposed to react to everything his father had assured him being smashed in the first five minutes? Because he was taking suggestions. If this turned out to be lies, simple things to appease a husband that would be neglected, Alex was going to die.

That reaction had him stopping short, looking to the man who seemed so shocked at the things he’d said. “If that’s what you wanted. I mean, it’s easy to see you two don’t get along. Why would I force that unhappiness on you?” His goal was to help Alex actually be happy here.

Something felt different, though it was nearly impossible for Valery to see. Faint, stifled breaths that he could only assume was him trying to hold back sobs. Wait, why was he crying? Had Valery already messed up? Or was it... because he was being so kind? “What your father considers your worth is no concern of mine. You’re my concern and why I’m being nice. Who you are. Not who your father says you are.”

Gently, he pulled Alex to him before hoisting the man up into his arms. Legs were gently wrapped around his waist and Alex’s body was guided flat against his own so he could press his face to the top of soft hair, one hand stroking through it. “It’s okay. You don’t have to stop. You can cry as much as you need to.” Valery would still be here and would still hold him.

I Do

svifa:

pryzhok:

Surprise coated his features at the offer. “I’d really like that… the only contacts in my phone are my parents and the children of wealthy family friends.” A shaky smile was given to the person offering up the phone, moving nervously over to his new fiance. “…I’d rather not have my parents calling me, if that’s not a problem. You can say no if you want since this is arranged to bring everyone closer.”

Alex bit his lip, unsure of if he should tell the truth or not. Valery didn’t deserve to be torn down the way Alex’s father had intended to do to him, but he also deserved to know the truth. “He didn’t tell me because… he, um, he’s punishing me.” Down his voice went, trying not to go incoherent but already ashamed and nervous of what Valery would think. “B-but you’re not a pack of wolves… you’re too kind to be what he wanted.”

That smile drew him in, had him pushing close and taking Valery’s hand in his. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable ever. Your happiness… is important to me.” Without Valery happy, he himself couldn’t be happy. They were connected now whether they like it or not. “I don’t want you to think I’m too clingy or anything. I don’t mean to be… I know most people won’t be comfortable with it, a-and it’s not like I need to be close or anything.” A pause. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to talk so much, either.”

“If you don’t want contact with them, then you won’t have to talk to them again.” Valery spoke easily, looking to Alex. “If they want to talk about business, then they can talk to me. You don’t have to see or talk to them ever again.” So there was clearly some strain in this family, but that much he’d assumed.

Brows raised up into his bangs. “This is a punishment? Your dad is a bit twisted to do this as a punishment.” He shook his head disapprovingly. “And I figured there were some issues, seeing as he didn’t give me any information about the things you liked... he simply told me your worth.” What kind of parent was that? A shitty one, really.

That hand joined his and the warmth spread all the way through his arm. “Don’t worry, Alex. I doubt there’s anything you did that could make me uncomfortable.” He gave his hand a gentle squeeze. “I’ll tell you right now, I’m not most people, okay? You cling to me as much as you like. And talk as much as you like. It won’t be a burden. It’s nice.”

I Do

svifa:

pryzhok:

“…I have a phone, but I don’t know if it works anymore.” Now that he was pretty much kicked out and all, he was fairly certain his father wouldn’t be paying for anything more of his. Plus… there was the problem of he didn’t like the idea of being able to receive a call from his father when that phone was in his pocket. “If you want, you could probably just put the numbers in the one I’ve got.”

Being viewed as not in the way, however, was going to take some time to get used to. The majority of his life was being in the way of his family, so to be told that he wasn’t going to be like that here was difficult to swallow. “…I’m sorry if it takes me a while to get used to this. I just learned about this an hour ago, so I’m not as prepared as I would have liked.”

“I like Alex, if that’s okay.” The warmth leaving his grasp was enough to pull that polite smile from his face, chest tightening without his consent. Valery was nice. He was kind, and he was well-intentioned, at least from what Alex could see. But losing that contact made him feel far more empty than he would have expected. “…Valery?” That quiet aspect was back to his voice, the teen quickly moving forward to follow. “I… would it be a bother if I… held your hand?”

“Well, we can always get you a new one anyway. One with a design you like. Unless you have any special attachments to that one. Any special contacts or anything.” Zilya waved away the thought. They were going to make sure the small male was comfortable here, as it was what Valery wanted more than anything. Comfort and happiness for the son forced into this. Hopefully good would blossom forth from it.

“Take all the time you need. There’s no rush in getting you comfortable and at ease here. I would’ve thought you’d be at least informed before today, seeing as your father had been trying to work this out for at least a little while.” Sure all of it had been rather rushed, but... “I’m sorry it seems like he threw you to the wolves.”

“Alex, alright. Valery is just fine with me. Though if you’d like to shorten it, I don’t mind.” Calling him Val wouldn’t be a problem if he was the type to nickname. The quiet request had surprise in his eyes before a gentle smile spread and he offered his hand back. “Of course it’s not bother. I’d quite like it, actually.”

I Do

svifa:

pryzhok:

“It’s nice to meet you, too, Zilya.” Aid. Aid, not a secretary, not a servant. It left an odd feeling in the teen, who didn’t know what such a thing would be needed for. It would probably be best if he didn’t question it since he didn’t want to go getting on anyone’s bad side yet, and anything that went unsaid was going to be something he wasn’t supposed to question.

Slowly his head shook, platinum brushing his cheeks with the motion. “You don’t need to apologize to me. I’m sure I’ll be perfectly comfortable here without you having to focus that much on me. I’m fairly easy to please.” The least he could do was not be a burden on the man he was supposed to spend the rest of his life with.

That hand was taken tentatively with another step forward. “Thank you. Really. I almost don’t know what to do with this much kindness.” Here he’d been expecting a horrible man that wouldn’t love him or care about him at all, and thus far that was incredibly far off. It’d been too long since he’d felt any sort of welcome anywhere, but Valery seemed genuinely pleased despite what was standing in front of him.

They nodded, offering up their own small smile before closing the door behind him. “Do you already have a cellphone? If not, I’ll be supplying you with one with all the numbers you’ll need inside should you ever want to go off on your own and need anything.” Their own number along with Valery’s personal would be in there as well.

“Please, I don’t want you thinking that you’re going to be in the way here.” That was the last thing he wanted. They were in this together now, certainly. “You’re fully welcome here. Don’t think of yourself as unwanted or a burden here.” Everything here was going to be as much Alexander’s as it was Valery’s.

Well at least he was coming off kind and not too pushy or anything. “Really, I’m pleased to have you here. Do you prefer Alexander or Alex? Or something else entirely?” Gently he pulled back from the handshake to lead him farther into the house. “Here, let me show you around.”

I Do

#svifa #「I Do」#「AU: Arranged Marriage」#[ -purrs- ]

svifa:

pryzhok:

The wait for the door to open was murder. Nerves went on edge, his heart thumping wildly in his chest. He’d been given no preparation, no warning time. No pictures. Whatever was waiting for him beyond this door was a mystery that he was going to have to figure out for himself, but by how pleased his father seemed -in his own malicious way- Alexander had been assured it was something he wouldn’t be happy with.

A hint of a smile was given when the door opened, Alexander attempting to look polite and happy in the way he’d been instructed when he felt like he couldn’t quite catch his breath. “Thank you… I’m glad to be here.” His wince was held in at the quiet tone to his voice, the teen already berating himself for the slip up. Messing it up this quickly would never work out for him in this new life.

His step forward was hesitant, a glance being given back to the driver following. With a motion the bag was handed over to him, held tight by the handle to hang low by his legs. Something to cling to and a way to let the escort he had disappear from his life forever. Aaaand there he went, nodding his way down the drive to hop right back into that shiny black car.

At least his fiance looked friendly and sounded nice… Alex was going to hang on to the hope that it would stay that way. “It’s nice to meet you, Valery. I’m sorry if I’m a little shy, I… I’m not always the best when first meeting someone.” I can understand if you don’t like that. Most people want to get an arranged fiance that’s charming and attractive, not quiet and scrawny.

His voice made him sound small, meek but sweet in nature. His stance relaxed a little bit, though he hoped it wasn’t too relaxed. Looking like a slob or anything wasn’t his goal. How to seem warm and inviting? It seemed like everything was suddenly impossible to remember how he did it normally.

“I’m glad you’re here too.” Valery wouldn’t lie... that he had some hopes from this arranged marriage. Perhaps it wouldn’t make this big house quite so lonely, having his fiancé there with him. You know, if they man even wanted to be around him.

“This is Zilya. They’re my aid and you’ll see them at most times.” Especially at home. When he went off on his own to go do extreme things, they hung back more. “Anything you ever need can be asked of them if I’m not around to attend to it myself.”

Slowly --knowing he didn’t want to make his impairment evident so soon-- he moved forward to meet him, offering a hand out. “Please, it’s no trouble at all. However you’re comfortable is definitely best. I’d like to make this as easy on you as possible... I... know that it’s not ideal for you, and I’m sorry for that.”

I Do

#svifa #「I Do」#「AU: Arranged Marriage」#[ -holds- ]

svifa:

pryzhok:

Everything looked normal - his father made sure of it. The small breakdown was concealed and fixed, makeup covering whatever couldn’t be taken away with a good face scrub.

At the moment, Alexander was busy looking out the window and not seeing a piece of the area that they drove by. It was both bad and good. Bad, because it meant sneaking out to go off and do what he liked would be near impossible. Different country, unknown region, and what was bound to be some kind of press from a marriage of two important people. like them. Getting out of this house to do the dangerous acts he’d grown accustomed to would be impossible.

On the other hand it was good for the same reason. A husband would hate that he liked to leap out of windows to escape his lonely home to go possibly kill himself in the wild unsupervised. High society would never accept a man like him doing the things he did. Life wouldn’t be as fun, but he was far less likely to make his new husband hate him.

Eyes lifted to the mansion the car pulled to a stop in front of. A businessman, from what he’d been told. No father, a mother in the hospital. A home far more empty than the one he was being thrown from, his father intentionally trying to make his life as worse as he possibly could.

The only hope Alexander could keep was that this wouldn’t go according to plan.

Out he slid, paying no mind to the driver gathering up his bag from the trunk and following. A nervous hand hesitated above the doorbell, seconds ticking by before he actually pushed it in lightly. What exactly was he supposed to say when that door opened? This was horrible for the shy boy to try and formulate.

Gentle hands aided in brushing hair into place, making sure everything was in order. Zilya stepped back, making a noise of approval. “There, you look fine. So at least we won’t be scaring him away with your looks.”

Valery snorted, trying to calm down his own nerves and appreciating their help in the matter. “Well, at least that’s one thing going for me. So long as the personality, the thrill seeking, and you know, the inevitable complete blindness doesn’t scare him away.” There were numerous things that made him an unappealing man, and he knew it very well. He didn’t need to see himself in a mirror to know that.

He was more nervous than he thought he’d be.

Letting out a terse breath, he felt his tension mount when the doorbell rang. Valery stood still while Zilya went to open the door. He readjusted himself, trying to at least appear not uptight or anything. This was already hard. What if anything he did could be taken into scrutiny? He couldn’t even see what this man looked like. Pictures were useless to him, after all. Planning ahead wasn’t even possible.

Still he looked forward, let a small welcoming smile spread across his lips. He could do this. There had to be a way to not fuck this up royally. “Welcome to my home, Alexander. I hope you can be comfortable here... and may it come to be considered your home, as well.”

I Do

#svifa #「AU: Arranged Marriage」#「I Do」#[ -tosses back at- ]

svifa:

It felt like the world was fall

out from under him.

Round, pale blue orbs looked at the man he’d known his whole life, the one he’d disobeyed, the one he’d disappointed, with a level of fear that had never been present inside of him before. Alexander had always known his father would be furious to find out he snuck out to do ridiculously dangerous things, knew he would be furious to find out his perfectly bred son liked both males and females.

“…you’re…”

Was there cotton stuff down his throat, to make it feel as if he couldn’t swallow or breathe? There had to be, making him want to just claw at his skin to get it out, make the joke disappear.

“…y-you’re getting rid of me?”

That same stern visage he’d grown accustomed to over two decades didn’t change the slightest bit. “Whatever it is you think is going on, you need to get used to the idea of your marriage.” Disapproval everywhere, this was a man who didn’t care for the son he felt had gone too far. “In an hour I have a plane to catch, and you will be residing in the house of your fiance.”

There went his legs out beneath him, just like the rest of the world. Alexander fell to the floor with a thunk, heart beating wildly in his chest but little else going on in that body. An arranged marriage. In Russia. He was being given away as a punishment for the horrible things his father believed that he was. Alex wasn’t bad. He wasn’t horrible because he didn’t want to be a quiet, perfect son, but now it certainly felt like he was being labeled as such.

Punishment by trying to marry him to a man he believed could never love Alex, and whom Alex could never love. Show him how wrong he was by giving him that forbidden partner.

“F-father, pl-please…”

The elder’s stern visage turned harsh. “Get. Up.” A hand shot out, grabbing his son’s arm to pull him back up to stand. “You will clean up and get ready to leave.”

“Now.”

“Mother, I’m getting married.”

He stared down at the immobile woman, eyes full of pain. She wasn’t even conscious right now, and it was up to the steady beep of the monitor to confirm she was still alive. Truly, he couldn’t even see more than her outline, a form in no color, no detail. Only a memory of what she had looked like to be transposed overtop it.

“I know it seems sudden and strange, but it’s what I must do.” For his father’s company that was now in his hands, for his country that this marriage happen. It wasn’t uncommon, strengthening the countries and businesses through arranged marriages like this. Normally, though, there was one more set of parents to actually help make such decisions.

Well, so long as it was a man, there was at least a better chance of it succeeding.

So long as said man didn’t hate him for this.

“I hope you won’t hate me for this either.” Gently, his hand brushed along one of hers before he turned and left, his coat being handed to him at the door and the petite assistant followed out after him. Zilya was the best visual aid he could ever hope for. They were incredibly attentive and compassionate to a fault.

Pushing out a tense breath, Valery climbed into the rear seat of the sleek black car, folding his hands into his lap and leaning back. No sense in looking out the window at just a blur of nothing. Zilya cleared their throat from the passenger seat. “I don’t think he’ll hate you.”

He closed his eyes, breathing deeply. “I sure hope you’re right.”

Ready, Steady, Go