I'm delusional and also the new Superman and Spider-man comic is coming out soon so those two are on my mind (LOOONG rant incoming
but imagine Peter Parker (or Peter Fitzpatrick, depending on what flavor of fic you like) where it isn't a crossover, where he was born and raised in the DC universe.
Peter in the foster care system and he meets Billy. or maybe aunt May went to the same med school as Bruce before he dropped out?
instead of being in Gotham and getting adopted by Bruce, him becoming a vigilante in Metropolis!
I mean, you probably expected this from the first paragraph of this but I really like Clark and Peter. Peter fits Metropolis much more that he does Gotham!
and I really want Clark to try and pull a Bruce when he meets Peter! he has a theme of forcibly loving the animal-themed smart and paranoid vigilantes he finds (cough cough Batman) and I also reeeaaaalllly like the idea of Peter looking up to cool reporter/investigative journalist Clark Kent! since Peter is always working for the Bugle in Marvel.
Peter trying to take as many good photos of Superman as he can, and tracking down the one guy who's always getting interviews with him?? like what's that about?
Clark seeing this small smartass child who DEFINITELY is a meta (imagining he can tell the same way Daredevil does) and also managed to actually get some good photos of him!
when the new vigilante in Metropolis shows up, Clark thinks he's eerily familiar. he calls Bruce, because he's far more experienced in spicy stray kids who want to punch criminals because this kid seems like he's got potential, and it's clear he's on his own, if the basically pajamas he's in are saying anything.
when Clark finally meets him, he's shocked, because this is definitely the weird 14-year-old who tracked down his schedule (not stalking, he said) to find a good time to talk (not interrogate). he should call Bruce. in the meantime, he should ALSO maybe keep an eye on this kid because HOLLY GOSH DID HE JUST RUN INTO A BURNING BUILDING
Peter wondering why the shit his Spider-sense is telling him he's being observed even though he's in his room? swept it for bugs, nothing, glared out the window, didn't see anything. seriously, how could anyone be watching (or listening) to him? and why is Superman suddenly so interested in him? don't get him wrong he adores Superman as much as the next guy but sometimes he'll see the guy just?? following him??
Clark laying on the floor in the family guy death pose when Bruce sends him his full in-depth background check and research on Peter because oh my golly how is his life so sad??
Clark repeatedly running into him and being like "hey oh wow what a coincidence also I have 5 breakfast sandwiches and already ate this morning how weird do you want them?" and Peter eyeing him with comical suspicion as he slowly takes the food, sniffing at it like a stray cat before thanking Clark and walking away, inhaling it the moment he turns the corner.
Clark sharing all of his progress with Bruce because "oh my gosh he's so cute! he blinks when he's sleepy, B! I'm going to die. he's adorable! he ate in front of me today, too, I'm making so much progress!"
It slips out to the rest of the batfam and Tim and Dick start conspiring to meet Peter. Tim stalks his social media and giddy-freaks out because THERE'S SOMEONE ELSE HIS AGE WHO'S JUST AS OBSESSED WITH PHOTOGRAPHY AND STALKING YOUR CITY'S HERO AS HE IS!
Tim and Dick absolutely PESTERING Clark to take them with him when he sees Peter next, and he relents because what's the worst that could happen?
Peter is initially wary, but quickly likes the two because they're just so nice? and they don't question any weird things about him and they're weird too. it doesn't hurt that Clark seems to trust them, because (he will not say this out loud) but he does trust Clark.
The kids teasing that Clark is picking up Bruce's habits, with Bruce himself occasionally poking fun with his dry sense of humor.
Clark eventually getting a foster license and brings it up to Peter, who goes silent because what's he even supposed to say? he ends up agreeing, and it doesn't take long after Peter is moved for him to figure out that Clark is Superman.
Clark brings him to Smallville to meet his ma and pa, and they love Peter. stuff him with food and affection, and Peter ends the day with his face hurting because he didn't even know he could smile this much.
Peter going with Clark to the dinners at the Wayne Manor and Alfred also adores him (who doesn't), and they just keep going back and forth with how polite they are. Peter promises to have tea with him sometime.
Damian warms up to Peter the moment he asks about his animals, and actually pays attention while he rambles about every single one. chimes in with as many animal facts as he knows and Peter ends up with a new knife.
after the vigilante batfam reveal, Peter is absolutely in awe the moment he steps down into the cave because? it's so cool?? he's like a kid in a candy shop when Bruce lets him tinker with some old tools and inventions.
Jason confused because oh god another flippy acrobat who's going to bother him but Peter actually knows how guns work (with a healthy amount of fear of them, but still) so Jason gives him a pass, to go with his sass
When Peter is older and eventually is invited to join the Justice League, he turns up and everyone assumes he was one of Batman's kids because Bruce was so friendly (not scowling and glaring) but absolutely in shock and hilarity when they learn he's Clark's. Billy gasping dramatically when he sees Peter because "OH MY GOD THAT'S PETER? SINCE WHEN WAS HE A HERO??" and once Peter meets Billy outside of Shazam, they do the Spider-man pointing meme
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