Yo

(ง •̀_•́)ง

[airframeextender]

you know what really gets my goat?

[aglaja-deactivated20131222]

el chupacabra

[megaceros]

gummy lamas

[megaceros]

And the less talented brothers

[lesser-flamingo]

tag yourself I’m dark blue

[just-shower-thoughts]

It’s strange to think that the ceiling and the floor are the same amount of space like when you look at the ceiling it doesn’t look like all the furniture could fit up there

[stability]

[medievalthymes]

if i don’t end up running down a palace hallway in a flowing couture dress at least once in my life then whats the point

[you-had-me-at-e-flat-major]

monolingual: how do you say the word welcome?

me: are you talking to one or more people? how acquainted are you with them? what gender are they?

monolingual: no it should just be one word

me: 🙂 that’s 🙂 not 🙂 how 🙂 language 🙂 works 🙂

[inabasket]

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

[hijerking]

how to become my friend

[isaac]

1: take pics of dogs you see

2: send them to me

3: that’s it

3: we are now friends

[just-shower-thoughts]

People without glasses are really out here seeing for free

[maplesugacookie]

Oh my god I really do have to pay to see what the fuck

[madopiano]

So…

[classical-crap]

my student: *makes a mistake while playing piano*

me: snazzy. a sharp eleven chord. I like it, but mozart would disagree

[saxophones-for-world-domination]

Trombones are the worst. Wanna travel from A to C? On a saxophone you lift one finger. On a trombone you YANK YOUR ARM THE DISTANCE FROM WISCONSIN TO ARIZONA OH MY GOSH 

[just-shower-thoughts]

No woman wearing a dress with pockets will fail to mention that it has pockets upon receiving a compliment on said dress.

[showerthoughtsofficial]

Beef jerky is like a cow raisin.

[ambermaitrejean]

Portraits of neighborhood cats. Photo by Amber Maitrejean

[bemusedlybespectacled]

how to “get” fahrenheit temps

think of it as a percentage of heat

40% hot? eh, kind of on the chilly side

75% hot? that’s pretty warm now

20% hot? that’s actually not warm at all

110% hot? we’re dying

[ineffabells]

IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW

[lich-of-the-golgari]

Fun fact: the Fahrenheit scale is used in temperature according to how it feels to a human. So looking at in percents actually is what you should do

[s3diya]

Now can I get a cheat sheet for Celsius

[tomorroejones-deactivated202209]

Ask water how hot it feels.

[dsudis]

My cheat sheet for Celsius is a rhyme I saw somewhere, possibly a guide for visitors coming to an event in Toronto:

30 is steamy,

20 is nice,

10 put a sweater on,

Zero is ice.

(I have been told “And 40 only happens in Australia” is an acceptable extension of the rhyme.)

[hotblugger]

adults: college 2 expensive??? just apply 4 scholarships!! it’s that easy!! apply to every singl one and u can pay 4 the college, ur just a lazy millennial (:

scholarships: $500 Scholarship, must be grad student majoring in neurobiology, must provide SSN, very large essay, impressive resume, published work and research, birth certificate, organ donor, ran a marathon. also ur competing against 2 million other students, good luck!!

me: why