there’s something about this, how easily his demeanor changes at the slightest touch, without needing to do or say much at all. even now, she remains naive to her own effect on people. bodies fall fast all around her; and henry most of all.
she gets a dangerous feeling. a sudden sinking feeling, being swallowed by a dark empty hole. she thinks it might be bad for her, but she hopes it lasts for awhile. the headache has all been forgotten.
both hands cling to henry’s arm, holding him closer than he needs to be. he’s been letting her keep her secrets, she likes him for that. but ada wonders if he wonders, what sort of questions are flying about in his head. he always has more thoughts than he can contain, that’s where all the worries come in. he cleans up her messes and still looks at her gently, softly, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. she wonders if their ignorance a bad thing.
the blood makes him nervous, even if he doesn’t say it. henry is delicate, perhaps a bit more than most people are. but he’s still sweet, even in his fragility, enough to care for her as if she needs any of that. ada doesn’t mind her messes, but she likes that attention. her nose brushes at his collar. “ am i scaring you? ” she whispers it, hesitant, as if she can’t decide whether or not to ask.
a hum dances around the shuffling of bed sheets and he makes himself more comfortable. legs spread about looking for the cooler spots on the bed. they’ll end up becoming tangled with ada’s at some point in the night. for now , they lay here letting their minds wonder into crevices that should probably be left alone.
someone like ada would be constantly looked upon and wondered. most want to touch , to see , to feel , but she doesn’t allow that. no one can or should police her or become self righteous in wanting to protect her , she can do that all on her own. that’s why henry is so forgiving. what she does is no concern to her. at the end of the day , they still lay together cocooned in their own little world. this is only for them to see , no one else can intrude.
now henry considers the question. thinks about it for far too long that it may become a regret that it was even asked. not a thing should arise as a concern, he’s just collecting his thoughts. if he was , he wouldn’t be clinging to her as if his life depended on it. ignoring that gut feeling he felt the first day he laid eyes on her was a good idea. she gives him a feeling that he never thought he would’ve felt. coinciding with blood and comfort.
he grows closer to her acting as if that’s the answer. words , she wants words. barely a sign of movement will do her justice. so , he sighs , jostles his head so that it’s somewhere looking up at her. after a pause he says , ❛ i don’t know. ❜
the consideration doesn’t end there. hand creeps up to where hers are clinging onto his and latches on ; like the negative particles of a magnet attracted to the positive. they cannot let go. she is swallowing him up and he willingly lets it happen , even grows closer to hurry up the process. that’s not someone who is scared. ❛ do you want me to be ? ❜
