𝖋𝖆𝖞𝖊

𝔴𝔢𝔩𝔠𝔬𝔪𝔢 𝔱𝔬 𝔡𝔢𝔱𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫, 𝔦’𝔩𝔩 𝔟𝔢 𝔶𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔞𝔰𝔰𝔥𝔬𝔩𝔢 21 | ♀ might be a vampire

[qlitorizz]

everyone here is so fucking rude but GOD FORBID you give that energy back?

[qlitorizz]

“WHICH ONE OF YOU DID IT” & “MADELEINE MADELEINE MADELEINE MADELEINE”

these scenes will forever be in the hall of claudia crashouts

[qlitorizz]

i refuse to watch the new season, cus wdym they reconcile and get beheaded INSTANTLY

[qlitorizz]

having a nightmare about a guy who isn’t with you on NEW YEARS?? my GOD and the urge to text him about it like “omgg i gotta tell him, he won’t belie.. oh yeah. we don’t talk like we used to. he probably won’t respond.” is SICKENING. SOMEONE SEDATE ME

[qlitorizz]

this aged well, we’re dating-

[qlitorizz]

oh claudia my baby, please give her back her madeleine

[qlitorizz]

my bf and i aren’t real.

so we see a sign that says lickdale, a place, and it’s become a running joke now. so we’ll see a name and say “omg they’re licking him like they’re licking dale.” however, i can never remember its dale, i keep thinking it’s dave! i blame this on alvin and the chipmunks. (i think ian’s name is dale for some reason)

so i see a sign and it says LM, so duh i think lick mike. and i say lick dave! he says no it’s dale. and i say “yeah i blame alvin and the chipmunks. dale is the bad guy who makes them sing for money and dave is a good parent. no he’s not. he also makes em sing and dance for money?” and so, from a previous joke unrelated, he says “i was gonna say is dave like joe jackson, but i almost said joe jonas.” and so he’d would be flicking the chipmunks while singing camp rock.

thank you for your time!

[qlitorizz]

i am a tampa bts concert-er. suck it.

[qlitorizz]

we went from not seeing yoongi for a decade and some change to seeing him damn near everyday and NO one is talking about it

[qlitorizz]

being jealous of two trolls who have like one of the most healthiest relationships i’ve ever seen is so humbling

[qlitorizz]

having a nightmare about a guy who isn’t with you on NEW YEARS?? my GOD and the urge to text him about it like “omgg i gotta tell him, he won’t belie.. oh yeah. we don’t talk like we used to. he probably won’t respond.” is SICKENING. SOMEONE SEDATE ME

[ohfxye]

you really gotta stop sayin darlin like that,

all slow and honey-thick,

like you’re leaning on a fence post

with the sun sitting polite on your shoulder.

i mean, listen to you.

you stretch one word into three,

and i’m laughing, shaking my head,

tellin you that drawl’s criminal.

but you don’t stop, do you, cowboy?

you never do.

you just smile and say it again real soft like.

like you know exactly what you’re doing.

and here’s the thing i don’t say out loud.

every time you call me that?

something in me tilts closer,

like i’m bein pulled by the sound alone.

so yeah, i’ll keep teasin you,

keep mockin the way you talk,

pretend i’m not replayin it later

just to hear you say darlin one more time.

[qlitorizz]

idc if this is me glazing myself but I STARTED TAKING THE G’s OFF OF SOME WORDS THE FARTHER INTO THE POEM TO SHOW IT WAS RUBBING OFF ON HER (a callout to my own habit to take on some of my partner’s mannerisms) BECAUSE ITS THE SWEETEST. FUCK OFF

[qlitorizz]

kocoum all the way but when john said “i’d rather die than live a hundred years not knowing you” lord did my heart skip a beat.. still Team Kocoum though-

[qlitorizz]

famous last words: overwatch edition

“WHY TF IS VENDETTA A CHARACTER IN THIS GAME”

“MERCY, MERCY HELP HELP IM RIGHT HERE”

“genji.. genJI.. GENJI DO SOMETHING”

“HE’S TOUCHING ME HE’S FUCKING ME HE’S IN MY ASS”

“huh.. it’s kinda quiet”

“THEY’RE BEHIND ME HELP ME”

[qlitorizz]

you ever pour your heart out and immediately get reminded why you shouldn’t?

[qlitorizz]

[qlitorizz]

relearning grammar and shit so i can sound more educated when i roast people >>

[qlitorizz]

why couldn’t i have been born a damn elven princess or something? i was born for magic, flowy dresses, smiling and waving.. maybe even hating my father, i already do that so why not do it to like a selfish ruler of a king.