DEAR READER
d e v o n
occasionally subtle
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
we're not kids anymore.
dirt enthusiast
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
if i look back, i am lost
Sade Olutola
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Cosmic Funnies
cherry valley forever
★
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blake kathryn
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Peter Solarz
PR's Tumblrdome
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@questionsgod
Are you Canadian?
i hover slightly above the earth’s atmosphere in a capsule the size of a dodo bird. this capsule travels not with the rotation of the earth, but against it. within the blink of an eye, i am in africa, then india, then china.
so, yes. kinda.
next question.
why does debian wheezy break when you install libc6-dev
try sudo aptitude update && sudo aptitude -f install
next question.
5 words you consider phonetically perfect?
nougat
ritalin
lickety split
moot
and piscine
next question.
Are you for or against Daylight Savings Time and why?
i am for it. i realise that northern cities in canada and europe would be heavily affected, and scandinavia would see even less light in the winter, but daylight savings is an old fashioned idea to give farmers more light in the fields. i see no reason why we must change the time for everyone else. especially with the invention of 24 hour shops. you don’t see night shift workers trying to change am to pm.
for some reason society is scared of making changes in this current time, which is why we still have dst. but don’t worry. in ten years after the nuclear fallout settles, we’ll all be making changes left and right. and that’s when we get the first female president. her majesty leslie knope.
next question.
if a po-tay-to and a po-tah-to are the same thing, why are oranges lonely?
okay what the fuck is this?
the regional pronunciation of potato has nothing to do with the loneliness of an unrelated fruit.
next question.
Do you think that with global warming now in full swing that the concept of 'seasons' is now redundant?
definitely not. seasons happen due to the tilt in the earth’s axis. this means part of the earth is physically closer to the sun in summer, and further away in winter. as the earth’s temperature rises as a whole, it will rise even more in the summer, and rise slightly less in the winter.
you question is actually quite stupid.
next question. and make it a smart one.
What is the art of conditioning? And how am I supposed to learn it?
see my previous answer on “how can i make my ex/best friend fall in love with me again.”
next question.
When is it peanut butter jelly time?
always.
every second of every minute is peanut butter jelly time.
before peanut butter jelly time was even a thing, it was still peanut butter jelly time.
the same goes for hammer time.
next question.
What does a hummingbird weigh?
between two grams and twenty grams, depending on the bird. a giant hummingbird weighs about twenty grams, which is a good amount of weed for a party.
next question.
Are you a solitary god or part of a pantheon?
a solitary. i was cast out for giving away too many secrets.
next question.
Why don't I have a boyfriend?
because you haven’t learnt the art of conditioning yet.
next question.
Which of the all the Doctors who have appeared as Dr Who is your favourite?
the tenth doctor played by david tennant was the best. he potraid the real doctor most accurately.
next question.
Do you know the way to san jose?
yes, i do. where are you travelling from? oakland or san francisco?
next question.
Are you really there?
yes, i am here.
next question.
Why is the sky blue?
because of the certain concentration of air molecules we have in our atmosphere. the mixture of nitrogen, oxygen and carbon dioxide create the perfect potion for sunlight to bounce through and only reflect back the color blue. also don’t forget the water molecules that are up there too. red, orange and yellow don’t show up because they’re too long of a wave length to be seen in the sky.
however, the sky is not a consistent color of blue. if you look closer to the horizon, you will see a paler or whiter sky, because the light gets scattered by the distance and number of particles it has to pass through. think of it as a filtering system. first it cuts out red and yellow, then it cuts out blue. and you’re left once again with white.
next question.
Why are you a cunt?
it’s the way your mother society raised me.
next question.
How can I make my ex/best friend fall in love with me again?
ah, okay, that’s a tricky one.
there is a way. it’s quite destructive, but it will work.
conditioning through acceptance, denial and subtle flirting.
for this, you need to get close to them again. become their friend, and hang out like normal. establish a good solid basis for your friendship. help them out when they need it. be there to comfort them. make jokes and laugh lots.
after about a month of purely friendship based meetings, begin to subtly flirt with them. touch their arm, pick something out of their hair, brush their hand as you’re walking along. all really simple stuff. now, whenever they respond well, reward them with more flirting. whenever they don’t respond well, punish them by not flirting for a bit.
the flirting will make them happy, and the denial will make them sad. after enough time, they’ll respond well without even thinking, allowing you to flirt even more.
as i say this is a very destructive game, both for you and the person you’re performing it on. once you realise just how easy it is to condition someone, you’ll begin looking at everyone in a different light.
but, it will work, and you will get them back. just make sure it’s subtle. if you choose to do this, you’ll be playing the long game.
next question.