Gypsy Soul

Thoughts and everything under the sun..

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He fell soundly a asleep in an instant.. while I cried wide awake..

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He fell soundly a asleep in an instant.. while I cried wide awake..

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Sometimes I still feel so lost. No own place. Everywhere I go I still don't fit in. I love all these people around me. Yes I do. But there are times I wanted to hide. There are times I wanted to go. Where do I belong?

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Continue..

.. to be strong, to love whole hearted, to be yourself.

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I'm drowning and I kept on sinking... I thought that you were the one to save me.. but why do I keep on sinking?

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I'm no good for anybody.. even for myself.

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My Soul Is Tired

My head are in constant battle between my heart. And my soul are getting tired of it. Sometimes I just wanted to give up. I am tired fighting. I can't even cry. I'd rather not breathe and just fall into an endless sleep. I've been trying so hard. I think I've given everything. I just wanted to cry...

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Confession of an INFJ

I feel sad when people can't seems to understand that sometimes your emotions just downs you and even you can't help that. It's always a problem for an INFJ like me.. I just feel it. You try to find some one to talk to hoping to ease the feeling of burden and pain, but they will just shove you off like what you are feeling is just not valid. Because they feel differently. Sometimes I feel like I wanted to get away from the world. Just be in the dark and wrap my self up and just cry.. yes. Sometimes crying ease a up a little. But then the feeling of emptiness will come back again like a tidal wave. Sometimes I really hate it when days like this comes. Because nobody understands and all negative thought came rushing in. You can't help it. It's hard to control. Believe me coz I've tried so hard to feel normal. But you can't. People will look at you thinking this person is rude, so drama queen, or just having an attitude. But deep within you, you are emotionally breaking down without even knowing why you are feeling that way. Thanks for me being a Pisces + an INFJ at the same time. Such a bad combination for a personality. You absorbed everything and yet not allowed to express how you feel because nobody would understand.

#confessionofaninfj #deepthoughtsandfeelings

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Sad day

I feel sad today. Because I feel that you are sad too. I know you feel like you failed and I feel like I think I am the one that causes you that. Sometimes I feel that I am jinxed. Na ako yung may dahilan why everything bad is happening to you. Na since nakilala mo ako everything turns out bad. What do I do? Do I need to let you go too? When everything seems so fine between us. I'm scared cause I don't want to loose you. I'm scared because I feel like you are the one. But why I feel so helpless that I can't do anything to help you out?

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Cold spring water sent chills up and down my spine. Awesome place to go this summer when the weather is scorching hot but not when the weather is cold..

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Valentine's Day

It's only our 2nd month 14th of February 2020. But it feels like it's been 2 years already. Yes we have some arguments over some petty things lately. He doesn't give me flowers and chocolates but I know that he wanted to. But there ate other things he need to prioritize about. But those little things he does that matters. I thought we're not going out that night. Because I still have to work late and he still needs to drive and work. But he decided to see me and have dinner still. Even though he isn't feeling well. I just can't stop thinking how much he never wants to let go of me. And just making me laugh silly. For me that the highlight of my night. I'm tired but never of him. I wish things and life would be nice to him. He deserves to be happy too.. I hope I'm making him happy.

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Simple conversation

He ask me one: night do you know why do I love you? I ask why? He said.. because you love me at my worst.. my body is in the worst shape, my complexion is the worst so far. You accepted me at my worst. That's why I love you so much. I became speech less... I love him because he is the man that he is.

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New Love

It started with a simple hello... And I never thought I can still find a person like you. Everything is new to me. This feeling. You are the only person that makes me feel so special. You bring smile to my lips but most of all to my heart. Those simple ways. Is very much important to me. You really is my sunshine. You are my King and I will be your King

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The moon or also the dream card. Is very relevant for me today. Because the past weeks I have so many vivid dreams. sometimes it makes me feel so tired that I felt like I haven't been sleeping at all. Maybe its because of the Scorpio ♏ season coming into being.

When the moon comes out from a reading its tells you that there are some secrets that's been ling hidden will come into being. The moon is our guide during night time. The moon lights our way on the darkest of night. It only tells that even on the darkest days of our lives, even in you feel that there is no hope the answer you will seeking for will reveal it's self. Be patient, it will come to you on the right time. Sometimes moon hides behind the clouds just be patient my darlings. And make sure that you are ready because sometimes some hidden truth are not easy to accept.

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Limbo

I feel like I'm just floating. Alive but not really living. Just going on a day to day basis. But doesn't really know if I'm really moving forward. It feels like I'm in a stand still and people are just passing thru like a blur. It's just feels like numb. Do I still feel? That I don't know. I said I'm fine but am I really? I'm just on a limbo floating, but doesn't go anywhere.

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My dream spread confirming the hidden message on my dream. That I should let go and move on and that I am not still listening to my inner self and still crying over you. That physically I'm sad of the things that didn't go into fruition. But emotionally I wanted to be happy that I'm confused and still juggling what should I choose. That you are the one who still affecting it and that I'm still chained on you. Which I am the one who is doing that. The spirits are telling me to move on and make that choice. Because I have a choice and I can free my self from that bound. And when I do that everything will grow and heal. I guess I guess I really need to take that leap of faith. And start all over again. Without you. I need to free my self from you. I need to get over you in my thought and in my heart. Because I need to heal. Because I need me. Because I need to love me.

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Dream Message

I dreamt of you earlier. I was talking to one of your staff and then you came into the room. You look serious at first I think. Then you came to me. I felt my heart stopped. I just looked at you. It's like I can't believe my eyes that I'm seeing you. You said to come with you and you wanted us to talk. I said that there's nothing more to talk to. Then you touched my hands and I was like frozen. And all the waves was crushing down on me. You carried me on your back and suddenly were on a swimming pool. As playful as you are a always you put me in there I saw it was a 6ft. Deep pool. Which I'm afraid I might got drowned because I'm not a good swimmer. But when I'm already in the water. I feel so at ease. And I can swim. I'd stay deep because I don't want to see the people above. But when I got out my clothes are all dry.

I guess my dreams meant that I'm not afraid of my emotions anymore. I wanted to know what you wanted to say to me. I guess it will be forever unknown. You are smiling so I guess you are happy now? I saw number 6 and six means balance. Maybe I need to balance my emotions. I see a lot of water, and water is related to emotions. Because I still have all these feelings for you. The water is calm maybe my emotions are starting to calm and receding.

It's really hard to move on and just forget how you truly feels. But sometimes we've got to move on. I guess you really are moved on? Are you truly happy now? Is that what are you trying to say to me? That I should move on too? That I should be happy?