;ah-mee-nuh❁ @radicallyyours - Tumblr Blog

remember that you are the love of your own fucking life

The woman you are becoming will cost you people, relationships, spaces, and material things. Choose her over everything.

Unknown (via onlinecounsellingcollege)

vueltaygiro

a beautiful day.

heavensghost

Never saw it coming

jupiterlicivciv

bloomingtrans

thinking about the friendships that just dissipate and the unresolved grief that comes with that

rinkitay

PASSIVELY DONATE THRU YOUTUBE VIDEOS

here’s a small list of videos you can watch and passively donate to different funds that are a part of the black lives matter movement. if you are interested in donating as well, i’ve linked most of the funds and organizations the youtubers are donating too. please do not skip the ads!!

I FOLLOWED A PROFESSIONAL MAKEUP ARTIST’S TUTORIAL: to the Black Visions Collective (x)

80p makeup... but what’s the catch? TESTING SHOP MISS A! First impressions and WEAR TEST!: to the George Floyd memorial fund (x)

In-N-Out Mukbang: to the Minnesota Freedom Fund (x)

how to help BLM with NO MONEY/leaving your house: to protestor bail funds of different states

I Got Drunk And Gave Relationship Advice! The ULTIMATE guide to BOYS & GIRLS!!: to the George Floyd fund and other racial equality charities (x)

Baby Products I Regret Buying: to the George Floyd memorial fund (x) and National Bail Out (x)

MY #1 PRODUCT FROM 10 DRUGSTORE BRANDS: the Black Visions Collective (x)

BIG LOUIS VUITTON HAUL | SS 2020 ESCALE + MORE | hollyannaeree: to the George Floyd memorial fund (x) and Campaign Zero (x)

WANT TO DONATE TO BLACK LIVES MATTER BUT HAVE NO MONEY? WATCH THIS VIDEO: to the Black Lives Matter organization (x)

Watch To Donate For FREE: Black Lives Matter: to Campaign Zero (x), NAACP (x), Black Lives Matter (x), Unicorn Riot (x), Comminuties United Against Police Brutality (x), ACLU (x), Color of Change (x), Equal Justice Initiative (x), Reclaim the Block (x), National Bail Out Fund (x)

Huge Prettylittlething & Missguided TRY ON Haul NEW IN... MAJOR Retail Therapy!!: to the George Floyd fund (x) and others

MAY FAVORITES & BOOKS I’VE READ THIS MONTH | I Covet Thee: to The Bail Project (x)

Quarantine Graduation Cap Cake for Class of 2020 | How to Cake It with Yolanda Gampp: to an unspecified organization dedicated towards the education for black students

AMSR Putting Fenty Makeup on Rihanna (Paper Makeover): to the Black Visions Collective (x) and Support the Cities (x)

TikTokers SPEAKING OUT About RACISM & BLACK LIVES MATTER (Ft. Charli D’amelio, Dixie D’amelio): to the Black Lives Matter foundation (x)

Let’s Talk About It: Racism & Social Injustice: to the Black Lives Matter foundation (x)

“but i’m not racist?”: to the Minnesota Freedom Fund (x)

regarding everything that’s happening: to the George Floyd memorial fund (x), Minnesota Freedom Fund (x), Los Angeles bail relief fund (x), Atlanta bail relief fund (x), Chicago Freedom School (x), People’s Breakfast Oakland (x), Black Queer/Trans operated fund in MN (x)

ratatouillecarliecullen

Low on funds due to covid??? Turn ad block off and STREAM STREAM STREAM

rewelcomed

kovir

being a woman isn’t about the body you were born with or your feelings or your brain it’s about being haunted by this quote from margaret atwood for your entire life

hopeforhealing-deactivated20200

“Male fantasies, male fantasies, is everything run by male fantasies? Up on a pedestal or down on your knees, it’s all a male fantasy: that you’re strong enough to take what they dish out, or else too weak to do anything about it. Even pretending you aren’t catering to male fantasies is a male fantasy: pretending you’re unseen, pretending you have a life of your own, that you can wash your feet and comb your hair unconscious of the ever-present watcher peering through the keyhole, peering through the keyhole in your own head, if nowhere else. You are a woman with a man inside watching a woman. You are your own voyeur.”

― Margaret Atwood, The Robber Bride

pinkymeowie

helpingg

creatingnikki

What I’ve learned in 2017

1. Burning bridges is not a bad thing. Because burning bridges saves you. It saves you from running back to toxic people and it protects you against them running after you. If they have no path to get to you, chances are, they are too lazy to create one. Or at least not bothered enough. Burn the bridges you need to. It’s not a destructive habit. Sometimes, it’s the most constructive burning you will ever do. 2. Decisions are daunting but they are not final. If you decide to opt for A instead of B, you may not always be able to go back to B in case you realize you have made the wrong decision BUT you can always research on options C, D, E and more. You can change the course of your life at any time you wish. Regretting is not productive, discovering a new path definitely is. 3. People will think what they want to. No matter what you say, no matter what you do, they will think as they please. ‘You know what is harder than getting someone to put their money in your wallet? Forcing your thoughts in their head.’ -Pinocchio (Kdrama) So why would you want to waste all that time and effort? Leave them alone with their thoughts as they may be and continue to do what brings peace to you. 4. We tend to inflate things in our head. When we are thinking of all the possibilities of certain choices, actions and situations, we tend to inflate the bad, the unwanted, the scary possibilities in our head. This makes us anxious and stressed more than is needed. That makes us want to back out of things, run away, not get out of bed. But in reality, even the worst possible outcome is not half as bad as we make it out to be in our head. Just show up. That’s when you will realize that the universe isn’t against you. That life isn’t that hard. That people aren’t that intimidating or superior (skills, knowledge, beauty, etc). That everyone is just as nervous and anxious and unsure. Of course, they are better in containing that. But that’s not always a good thing anyway. 5. People say things about us. Good and bad. But we can’t base our decisions on that. And we can’t base our opinion of ourselves on that. Why? Because what people say isn’t reliable and what people say isn’t constant and what they say definitely isn’t so much about us as it is about them. We can’t let a compliment make our day because if we give the words of others that kind of power, a rude remark can also completely ruin our day. And sadly, the latter is usually more in abundance than genuine compliments. 6. People change. But so do you. And maybe it is harder to accept the changes in yourself than it is to accept them in others. I used to be a night person. I wouldn’t go to bed before 5 am. My sleep cycle was this messed up for 5 years. But that changed this year. However, I found it so hard to stop describing myself as a night owl when I met new people even though now I was going to bed by midnight. It is so important to accept the changes in yourself and to use correct language. I used to be someone who would binge eat. I used to be someone who would send long, emotional texts at 4 am to people who abandoned me. I used to be someone who would give people more chances than they deserved. Used to. 7. People at work don’t give a shit about your emotions. Or your anxiety. You need to better take care of yourself. You need to be better composed. Being an emotional mess is usually okay. But not at work. Anywhere but at work. 8. Some people know what they want to do in their life right from school. They are very clear about what they want and what they have to do in order to get it. And they do exactly that.

But then there are those like you who don’t have a very solid idea of what your life should look like in terms of your career or life in general. It is scary. It is very overwhelming. And it is super confusing. But you will figure it out.

Just like you figured out how to be able to breathe after having your lungs crushed along with your heart or when you should say no or that time when you refrained from saying anything at all because you realized it wouldn’t change a thing. You will get this. It isn’t a race. And there should be no comparisons. 9. A very wise person coined ‘health is wealth’ because it is one of the truest things I’ve heard since I was little. Most other things were just sexist or racist. But this. THIS IS SO TRUE. It may be hard to realize now, being young and all. Right now your body may be able to take everything you throw at it. But just like everything else, this will not last. Physical exercise and eating right are essentials. There is no easy way and there are no pills. Your body very well understands the concept of ‘you will get what you give’. Treat it wisely. 10. Needs vs Wants. What would you like to hear? That you have won a world tour or you have a brain tumour? I think I know your answer. But were this not a hypothetical situation, you would benefit from hearing what you don’t want to hear rather than hearing what you want to. Had you only got the news of the world tour and not the required diagnosis, your health would further deteriorate. That’s the difference between a want and a need. Most times, a need is essential to survival. Know the difference. Make that choice which though hard in the present, will be super beneficial in the long term. 11. Globalization includes more than just a few countries. I think this was an obvious one, but for some reason it took me watching Korean TV shows this year to realize that all countries in the world have a beautiful culture and so much to offer and it would be really fun to know more about different countries than to be fixated on just my own and a few others. 12. The healing time for different people is different. So it may hurt to see her make new friends and party while you are all alone, but you will get there too. It may just take a little longer. And that’s okay. 13. Skills are super important. I mean, if somehow you ended up in like the 16th century, how would your knowledge and skills help the then world in advancement? This realization made me feel really lacking. But I won’t be sitting here and cribbing. I already have a list of things I want to learn in 2018. They might not necessarily help the hypothetical situation of being in the 16th century, but they will definitely add to me as a person. 14. Take your time. Take your time to reply back to that text. Take your time to give an answer. Take your time to be ready. Don’t overwhelm yourself with the expectations of others. Because maybe they don’t care as much about you replying back as much as you’re getting anxious about not having replied yet. 15. Show. Don’t tell. Don’t share your plan or goal with others. I mean, sure, maybe with one or two super close people, but don’t go ahead yelling it on the microphone (or well social media) every time you get a new idea or make a new choice because people have a way of fucking it up. Intentionally or otherwise. Even if you want to tell them, at least don’t hand them the blueprint. It is always nice to share once you’ve achieved your goal than to tell everyone when you are yet to start with the execution. It’s better that they see what you’ve achieved or done rather you telling them before it has even materialized. 16. Don’t sympathize with people too much. Especially not if you start feeling guilty about not having as many problems as them. Because most times, if you sympathize THAT much, you tend to alter your life to make theirs better and chances are, their life isn’t as bad as they make it to be. So you end up giving up on things for them and later realize that that wasn’t quite needed. Not that they are intentionally trying to make things seem worse than they are, just that maybe you feel every word of what they say deeply. In any case, you don’t have to feel guilty about having a better life. 17. Happiness and satisfaction are two different things. And what you want to aim for is satisfaction. Because happiness is getting a new phone or getting a good morning text from someone you like. It is external. It is short lived. It will never be enough. Satisfaction is internal, it isn’t attached to materialistic things and it isn’t tied to other people. Satisfaction is working hard on a project and learning a lot. It is learning a new skill. It is making a choice trusting your instinct. It is living your life in a way that lets you sleep well at night and have a light heart. 2017 was quick. But 2017 was healing. It was realizing that after all the damage done in 2016, I can still be okay. And that throughout my life, I will fluctuate in my ‘okay-ness’ and that’s completely okay.