[ramslambsandwolves]

Hollanov and the Cens watching “Together” and everyone being like “ew, what a crazy portrayal of codependency” meanwhile Shane and Ilya are like……..fusing….with the loml……forever? How tragic…… how awful……

….and then they have to fuck about it later

[ramslambsandwolves]

Something something ember and ice ….something something flying naked………..

[iwrotemrtambourineman]

ilya telling shane about irina and how they were best friends and he hung out with her all the time and he was her protector and he would skip school on her bad days to brush her hair and make sure she ate something even if it was just tea and she was an angel and you know shane is calculating how best to gently bring up to his husband that that doesn’t sound like it was very fair to child ilya without ilya reacting like a wild fucking animal

[bluegrasshole]

the most unrealistic part of heated rivalry is that two professional athletes couldn’t take down 8 burgers (with no sides) between them

[2goldfish]

I’m tired of pretending that I don’t want some post-retirement fat Ilya art. I wanna see that big fat old hairy man and I need you all to see my vision

[madrasaur]

bellboy mr shane hollander at your service!

[ramslambsandwolves]

Off Campus copying the HR promo’s…..even stole hudcon’s quinn ad beat for beat 😭 i KNEW tv execs were gonna be like “oh everyone’s really into hockey” post HR and it’s like no we’re into queer romances & writers, people of color, hot sex, and two people falling in love so hard it makes 100,000 people want to make art about it.

we don’t need/want another “girl tutor & boy jock kiss”.

if i was pitching to Amazon it would be a SOUTHERN black queer romance between two football players who were childhood friends then join the SEC for two universities that i would call the Alabama High Tides and the University of Athens Hounddogs.

[ramslambsandwolves]

I think it’s funny how in an a/b/o universe, everyone knows 100% about their anatomy when in reality we don’t or there are large disparities between what students are taught about their bodies and sexual education. Here are some common health misconceptions in my a/b/o universe:

*It’s a misconception that ruts and heat sync up when a couple is most compatible. This can lead partners who have cycles that don’t lineup feel negatively about their relationship when in actuality it just depends person to person. The chances of an omega and an alpha going into heat/rut at the same time is like 14%

*No you can’t send someone into a heat or rut by smelling really good: a ‘sudden heat or rut’ is usually the result of muted pre-cycle symptoms due to stress, exhaustion, depression, and, according to a recent study, citrus fruits can mute these symptoms too. interestingly, early stories of spontaneous cycles started on pirate ships where citrus eating was mandatory, leading to many stories of men suddenly going into rut at the sight of a siren or mermaid.

*Intersex people exist in this world too! There are alpha’s with slick glands, omega’s with knots, alpha’s with no knots etc. etc.

*Yes you 100% can get an omega/beta pregnant outside of a heat.

*Being in heat/rut =/= a complete loss of senses and some primal instinct takes over you. Being in cycle should not fundamentally change you or your partners personality.

*A bonding mark must be placed at the scent gland for it to stick. However many people think (via too many romantic movies) that it’s always conveniently right above ones pulse. In actuality it changes from person to person. About 1/2 of all ‘rejected’ bondmarks are in actuality just a wound in the neck, from misunderstanding where to actually bite. A good a/b/o sex ed program would teach F.A.B F-finger and find where the gland is. A-Ask for Consent and then B-bite.

[russianblush]

ilya happy trail and bush ٩(^ᗜ^ )و ´-

[ramslambsandwolves]

Again why did i write my waxing fix about Shane and not this hairy mf??

[ramslambsandwolves]

GIVE ANTHONY STARR A GODDAMN EMMY OR THE 2 2027 ACTOR WINNERS I WILL BE SNEAKING INTO THEIR HOUSES STEALING THE TROPHIES AND DELIVERING IT TO MR. STARR!!!

like this man truly became one of the GREATEST comic book villains of all time. There will never be another Homelander. This is Heath Ledger levels of “i made this character from scratch and every subsequent performance will try and fail to emulate what i created.” Homelander was, a bumbling scared child, an ego-driven narcissist, and unconceivable evil all within the same performances.

Homelander’s final scene was soooooo well acted and written. Anthony showing what a powerless Homelander was - and it’s exactly what we thought and kinda worse. Like i spent 10 seconds legitimately feeling bad for him because Starr absolutely NAILED the way he just crumbles, knowing for the first time in his life he’s going to lose. And he can’t blame the Deep, or Vought, or Madeline, or Firecracker or A-Train or Starlight or Ryan or Soldier Boy- it was him.

[ramslambsandwolves]

Okay okay i was thinking about non-traditional a/b/o hollanov and idk why i never considered omega!ilya & omega!shane but omg my mind is opened.

Shane, who is desperately trying to conceal his designation, swallowing suppressants like candy to pass as a beta, but Ilya isn’t fooled during the bike scene when he gets a whiff on earthy incense and is 100% sure during the shower scene when Shane’s topical suppressants are washed off and his nose if full of a sweet burning smell- something uniquely Shane.

Ilya, who was unfortunately given suppressants at too young of an age (his father really wanted an Alpha) so his omega smell is severely muted but he lives happily as a covert beta, fucking omegas and alphas as he pleases.

when Ilya propositions Shane in this au, Shane is like sure cause omega’s always agree to fuck Alpha’s and Ilya’s so cute, even though Shanes’s dreading the idea of being knotted.

But then ilya gets up to his room and presses Shane to the door and huh- that’s definitely not an alpha smell; overpowering and awful. It’s light and herbaceous, a mix of fresh cut grass and mint and Shane’ buries his face in Ilya’s neck without thinking-

“You're a ….” Shane starts to say but stops because acknowledging what Ilya is means acknowledging that he really only likes other omegas and he’s not quite there yet.

“Is okay?” Ilya asks cause he’s also a little scared he may have been presumptuous and maybe Shane does want an alpha.

“Very.”

[ramslambsandwolves]

Yall we’ve GOT to start impregnating Ilya more.

Stay at home dad Ilya. Ilya retiring early because a family is a more exciting challenge. Taking their baby to games with those ridiculously huge headphones while ilya excitedly points “theres your daddy!’ Shane coming home from a shitty practice and he opens the door and hears “Daddy’s home!” he actually feels like he won 7 stanley cups.

pregnant ilya who’s junk food preferences are absolutely insane (to shane) but you bet your ass Shane’s driving to DQ and Taco Bell because their baby needs a chicken chalupa and a Reese's blizzard at 2am. Shane insisting on buying the newest, most expensive baby products “my love we don’t need a $4000 crib” “but it has a sensor that alerts us if her breathing changes.” “And you will watch it all night and never sleep.”

ilya bent over the toilet with morning sickness cursing Shane Hollander’s name as if he hadn't begged Shane not to pull out 5 months ago.

[rylandsgrace]

[ramslambsandwolves]

Ilya chirps Scott all the time cause Ilya’s just a menace? Nah.

Ilya chirps Scott all the time cause Ilya blames Scott for being the reason he had to wait 2 years to finally fuck Shane? Yeah

[ramslambsandwolves]

Crazy how Shane has been hc’d as a neat, organized clean freak when we saw him fold his clothes before sex one (1) time and its presumably because a) he was nervous and trying to buy time and b) that was either a rented suit and or his only black suit and he didn’t want to risk sneaking out of Ilya’s hotel room looking clearly freshly fucked AND WITH wrinkled clothes.

anyway #myshane isn’t organized, isn’t a clean freak (he’s a millionaire with a cleaning crew) , doesn’t have a skin care routine that isn’t water and the same St. Ives oatmeal scrub he’s been using since middle school and thats the most we can expect from the king of jocks.

his fruity ass, genderqueer russian bf however? Full facials, a korean skincare monthly subscription, throws the st. Ives away, tries to convince Shane to do face masks with him (Shane 1000000% cannot deal with the texture of drying clay on his face), like marly said, he’s a fucking beautician.

[ivealwayssaidthis]

i dont like when shane is characterized as being a color coded spreadsheet super organized and neat guy. that's not him. he's in a pressure cooker of his own design but he pays people to do the admin for him. he pays for an interior designer and a stylist and a perfectly balanced meal delivery service. his mom manages his calendar. shane wants so badly to outsource control to someone else who can tell him how to be shane hollander. he does not have a fucking color coded spreadsheet

[ramslambsandwolves]

So excited to get writing again ……then broke my phone 😭