look alive, senpai

zoë. andrcwjminyxrd - aftg sideblog

[jasonptodd]

this is literally the funniest post on this site i’m going to fucking kill myself having never achieved this level of comedy

[amusementforme]

[lizziesupremacy]

THE LAST DAY GUYS

[darkmuse112-og]

Every April 30th, like clockwork.

At least I know that the people of tumblr will never let me down.

[theinturnetexplorer]

Homosexuality explained in a German Children’s Book

[angiethewitch]

[foxybluejazz]

[memory-thought]

Its my personal belief that the “but how do you explain it to the kids?” crowd, has never explained anything to a child in their lives.

[soulvomit]

In my experience, they just don’t want their kids to know about it.

[im-a-sokka-for-you-ooh]

[vegetablewolf]

Quick addition: in german the word for friend and boyfriend are the same, so he might already be implying that he knows of their relationship early on and!!!

Where it says: “Love is the only way to achieve happiness” it actually says “Love is the most beautiful way to achieve happiness”

[proficientatfreakness]

Papa has a type and it’s dark-haired

You go, herr dad!

[injuries-in-dust]

Source: Instagram

[deepvoidchaos]

:0

[ardatli]

ONLY SOME OF THEM ARE CUTE OTHERS ARE GOING TO EAT YOUR SOUL FOR TEA

[gothiccharmschool]

No, no, that type is also cute.

[ramnamsatyahai-deactivated20210]

[kudzuman-deactivated20220925]

[miniimaelstrom]

[audio transcript:

first woman [excited, upbeat tone]: Who’s gonna tell VeggieTales that their main character’s a fruit?

second woman [more subdued, serious tone]: I hate to break this to you, but... nothing’s a vegetable. “Vegetable” is just a term that means “you can eat it”. In botany, nothing’s a vegetable. So, like. Yeah, a tomato’s a fr- a berry, but. A, a carrot’s just a root. And. And a potato’s just a tuber. And, like? A, a cucumber is just a melon. Melon’s are fruits... in other ways. You’re not gonna put a cucumber in your fruit salad, though. Not gonna put a tomato in your fruit salad. Broccoli? Broccoli’s a fuckin’ flower. We’re eating a flower when we’re eating broccoli. All, like, lettuce, kale? That’s just a leaf. It’s just a leaf. Nothing’s a vegetable. Vegetables don’t exist.

end transcript]

[deadeyesopened]

collection

[funnypeopletwitter]

This is definitely me

[jaubaius]

Sounds like most Chihuahuas and I would bet a prior Chihuahua owner would take him.

[squish-this]

I didn’t think the picture could do him justice after that description but it absolutely does and I for one am delighted

[daimboy]

some beautiful little stories

[daimboy]

i just heard thé news that yahoo answers will be permanently shut down, so i will share these again :-‘[ 💔 also edit: here’s two more

[daimboy]

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

[outofcontextyaoi]

[outofcontextyaoi]

every single reblogger has tagged this with some variation of ‘me’, except for the one person who tagged it

[thatwitchrevan]

I personally wanna see less 'you are not a burden/it's not work to love you' and more 'you are worth the work it takes to love you.' I KNOW I'm a burden sometimes. that isn't such a terrible thing! humans are strong. we can carry burdens. and it is work for me to be there for my friends, but it's work I'm willing to do.

we need to acknowledge this because pretending love isn't work will never make people like me feel less guilty for accepting love. we need to talk about it so people don't feel bad for having boundaries and not always being up to do the work. we need to accept it so we can properly appreciate what others do for us and what we're doing for them.

yes it does take work to love you. but guess what? you still deserve love, and you deserve people who are willing to do the work to love you. it doesn't make you bad. all love take work. and everyone is worth it.

[garfleas]

[hunterbadbatch]

[brodiebutt]

hating popular things doesn’t make you interesting

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

yes it does

[aimmyarrowshigh]

[rootbeergoddess]

Oh my god yes

[mollyscribbles]

I noticed the date on the article was 2018 so I checked and – trailer’s out.  Summer 2021:

[helloitsbees]

modern art

[beautifulscreaminglady]

they’re not going to give you a title for your performative mourning on instagram

[synthetic-ultramarine]

there is a lot of unintentional humor created by the fact that the characters in “Dracula” do not know that they are characters in “Dracula.” 

[synthetic-ultramarine]

“The people in the village are warning me about a local legend called a ‘vampire’. How quaint. When I meet Count Dracula I shall have to ask him if he knows more about this peculiar superstition.”

[highly-radioactive-nerd]

“I never drink…. Wine…”

Some guy in 1893 reading Dracula for the first time: Huh.. What a strange fellow…why doesn’t he drink wine?

Me, reading in a time where Dracula is the most instantly recognizable villain in pop culture: LOL HE SURE DONT