đđ€ Varney Headcanons | not really realistic but im bored and its a fun pasttime đ€đ
I did Ratko, i am beyond bored so now im doing Varney/Death. I've got more plans for Ratko on the future. Because why not.
A lot of these will be unserious, Because Varney is completely unserious in and of himself.
#1: his fangs are long and slender compared to Ratko's thicker fangs. Fangs of a vampire's are very regional and tend to vary from place to place to accommodate the needs of the vampire. There may be the occasional difference, but fang structure is relatively the same.
#2: Varney was either made by the Reaper or was a vampire that it took over as a form of its own. If he was made by the Reaper, thats why he looks (and smells) so bad. Because the Reaper cant make something truly functional and living. If he was a vampire who was taken over, he was likely either cornered into giving himself up, brute-forced or silently convinced to, whether it be with power, security, etc.
#3: Varney lowkey nearly freaked the hell out when Ratko turned around and called him out ("I am a soldier, is still do not know what you are supposed to be"), but definitely had fun with that after finding out it was just Ratko raving again.
#4: he was very [in]discreetly dangling the carrot over Ratko's head ("you dont know what I am, but I tolerate you simply because you're good at death. It nourishes me"). The fact he couldn't keep his mouth shut after being told off was enough to make Ratko suspicious.
#5: Again, what he said made Ratko suspicious. Extremely suspicious. Ratko said just the right thing to get Varney to turn and nearly let the truth slip. Considering the pair didnt get much farther after that was irrelevant.
#6: he is painfully used to getting things thrown at him by Ratko.
#7: his nails are atrocious. Actually. This isnt a headcanon. He has horrible nails.
#8: compared to most other vampires, he cannot turn into a bat, only a cloud of smoke and dust. This isnt doubted because of vampires like ChĆ, who turns into mist instead of a bat.
#9: he can be very domineering and snarky towards people he thinks he has power over. And he does it so effectively (and effortlessly) most would fail to even realise he doesn't.
#10: hes mentioned this before, but he can smell the decay on people. Thats how he found (and probably became enamoured with) Dracula and Ratko.
now for the silly headcanons.
#11: he is stupidly both stubborn and selfish, and that only gets him so far.
#12: despite looking like a 40 year old man in a mid-life crisis, he is a total princess. Really. Him and Ratko are the original princess and the knight duo.
#13: hes the type of guy to carry around pocket sand to get out of situations.
#14: the type to throw tantrums. Will look at your weirdly if you tell him he is throwing a tantrum.
#15: sure, hes a tall guy, but hes comically short compared to Ratko. Like up to his shoulder. Frequently used as an armrest. Thats what makes it comical.
#16: probably a blue raspberry or cola lover when it comes to candy. Idk, he just has that vibe.
#17: much like Ratko, he kicks, throws and hits things a lot. Will scowl at you if you tell him that, too. "You dare compare me to that oversized buffoon! Dont you know who i am?!"
#18: really likes his earrings. Thinks they're the best earrings in the whole of Wallachia. And the whole world.
("Ill have mostly silly headcanons, because hes silly" i say, as i actually have more serious headcanons than silly ones.)
There we go. Once again done for today. Ill be back with more Ratko and some Nikolai headcanons sooner or later (if i can find any gifs for Nikolai đ). Byeeeee đŠđŠđŠ