fanfiction authors moodboard
Keni
will byers stan first human second
Misplaced Lens Cap
dirt enthusiast

oozey mess
šŖ¼
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
RMH
One Nice Bug Per Day
AnasAbdin
almost home
art blog(derogatory)

blake kathryn
taylor price
noise dept.

Kiana Khansmith
No title available
Jules of Nature
Acquired Stardust
Peter Solarz

seen from Brazil

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seen from Bangladesh

seen from Türkiye
seen from Netherlands
seen from United States

seen from United States
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seen from United States
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seen from United States
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seen from United States
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@rdarkstorm
fanfiction authors moodboard
Elsa & Nokk
I empathize completely
I empathize completely
My heart is so full
Listen. I am shown a great many catte images by my loyal adherents and followers. But this short film clipā¦is of a caliber beyond most others.
The mother-in-law bribe backfired
This is not my story. Ā This was told to me by a woman I knew from work several years ago; sheās a very sweet nurse.
Nurse graduated from nursing school and decided with her friend to move to one of the cities that was listed as having āthe most eligible bachelorsā from some publication. She moves and starts dating her future husband.
Future Husbandās mother is a viper and decides Nurse is not good enough for her family. Ā The Ā happy couple eventually get engaged and future mother-in-law is having none of it. Ā Tries for several months to break them up; tries to convince Nurse to go back where she came from and simultaneously tries to gently convince her precious son that Nurse may not be good for him.
To add some more context to this situation, this MIL is pretty nasty to Nurse but hides it well to other people, always making sure sheās super (fake) sweet to everyone when others are around.
Finally wedding plans are set so MIL gets desperate. Ā She gets Nurse alone with a āgenerousā offer: leave fiance and never come back in exchange for $10,000 (note: this was almost 30 years ago so I guess it was kind of a shitload of money for most).
Nurse is so sick of this womanās shit and is incredibly insulted. However, sheās intelligent and maintains her composure. Ā Nurse accepts the offer.
Nurse takes the money, does not leave, and gets married anyway. Nobody else knows about this.
MIL cannot say or do anything about it without exposing herself to her family as a horrible person.
Nurse and husband are still happily married; their kids are grown; husband still has no idea this went down.
MIL has suffered silently for almost 30 years.
I reblog this every time I see it, because itās a Machiavellian power move AND I LOVE IT!Ā
Fox canceled Brooklyn Nine-Nine, and Twitter is rightfully angry. This show did wonders for thoughtful, authentic representation; Iām really sad to see it go.Ā
concept: i slowly fade out of existence. nobody misses me and itās ok. the people i love are so happy and nothing is hard. iām content
ć¾( ̄ā ̄)ćć
is it weird that i feel like iām max in this universe and i just want to jump through the screen and screamĀ āIāM SO SORRY I MISS YOU CHLOE I WISH I WOULD TALK WITH YOU TOO PLEASE DONāT HATE MEā
Iāll never not be amused by the fact that I can drop the words ācrucifix nail nipplesā into a conversation and some of you who have been with me since the livejournal days will join me in the flashbacks, screaming and crying all the way.
I require context. Because this is a very interesting start of a story, and now I need the rest of it. Could I get a link, or a summary, or something? Pretty please?
All right buckle the fuck up kids, itās the year 2012 and Iāve just been handed what should be an easy editing gig by my senior editor. Itās a vampire erotica story because one of the final Twilight movies is about to come out, and everything is vampires. Everything. I havenāt edited a single thing in months which isnāt about vampires. I am ready, I can do this. So I open the file and notice thereās a typo in the title, which really should have been my first inkling that something horrendous was about to go down, but you see Iām not quite dead inside yet so I carry on, bushy tailed and bright eyed with my faith in humanity intact. Itāll be dead by page 24, but I donāt know that yet. Iām just editing one more vampire boner fest.
The MC is a girl who weāll call Sue. Sue is a Good Girlā¢, Sue is Not Like Other Girlsā¢, she is pale and awkward and a virgin and has somehow managed to find herself a Bad Boy⢠for a boyfriend. Weāll call him Dickhead.
Now Dickhead as previously stated is a bit of dick, he tries to pressure Sue into sex because he knows she is The One⢠but he loves her really so itās okay. Except itās not okay because Sue is a Good Girl⢠and holding out till marriage which heās fine with except heās got such a bad case of blue balls that one night walking home an attractive stranger lures him into an alley with the words āhey studā and he follows, dick out before sheās even finished her sentence. Well turns out that was a mistake for Dickhead because sheās a vampire, but not just any vampire, a Dick Biting Vampire. So what started out as a skeevy blow job behind a club that heāll feel bad about in the morning, turns into him being bitten on the dick and drained of his life essence and left for dead. Except DBV fucked up and now heās a vampire. Are you still with me? Good, cause itās about to get weirder.
Realizing he is now an abomination, Dickhead flees, becoming a creature of the night and feeding on animals rather than humans to repent for being such an asshole in life. Sue meanwhile is heartbroken, but carries on valiantly with her life and goes to bed each night crying for the loss of her One True Love⢠who she would do anything to bring back. Well guess what Sue, Dickhead never really left you! Heās been āinstinctively protecting her from rapistsā by hiding out on her roof and fighting hobos who try to get to her open window via the fire escape for months now. Because thatās not fucking terrifying at all.
Upon learning of his predicament and how it happened, Sue can do nothing but blame herself. Oh if only sheād let him touch her secret places, then perhaps all of this could be avoided! Meanwhile Dickhead is having another dilemma of his own, realizing too late that his vampire powers have given him super senses and now he can smell her blood and he canāt decide whether he wants to get with her or eat her. And I donāt mean in the French sense. But he is strong! And over comes his base manly vampire instincts and neither rapes not kills her. Hurrah! And this is so romantic that Sue gives it up, but not before she launches into a theory about how in all fairy tales, True Love saves the day, so maybe her magical pure vagina that has never been touched by anyone, not even her, can bring him back to life. So Dickhead being a dickhead agrees and rips her clothes off, but not before he takes one last moment to marvel at the beauty of her purity, because he will never again look on her again and know she is Pure.
If youāve only vomited once by now, I applaud your resolve.
So they hop on the good foot and do the nasty, except she is literally so pure in spirit, her flesh burns his. And I quote you from memory because these words are burned into my soul: āher breasts bit into his hands, like crucifix nail nipples tearing at his flesh, but he did not care because he loved her so and couldnāt stopā
This phrase haunts me. I dread that it will be the last thing I think about on my death bed and my last words will literally be āgod fucking dammitā as I die, carrying that mental image with me into the afterlife. My own solace is in knowing that I inflicted it on other people too, like @ahzuri who is somehow still with me after all these years.
When the magical burning sex fails to heal him and leaves her bruised, battered and broken with āa dainty blue bells of bruises around her secret flowerā (I am genuinely quoting this, I could never make something as horrendous as this up without being on acid) Dickhead leaves. Yeah. Off he fucks, leaving her to the mercy of the hobos at her window, and into the night to be the true monster he really is. But wait, thereās more. Remember the dick biting vampire? Well turns out she has figured out she made him into a vampire and has also been stalking HIM and is totally jealous of Sue, so tries to kill her. But again Sues Purity saves her, because sex before marriage which was done out of True Love is not a sin, so she is still a spiritual virgin and Iāll be honest, I started drinking heavily at this point and itās all a bit of a blur.
A fight ensues some pages later after Dickhead returns, realizing the mistake he has made. And he rescues Sue from the Dick Biter, but not before he assaults Dick Biter, and calls her a slut for luring innocent men into alleys cuts her heart out by cutting her breasts off, at which point i screamed āTHATāS NOT HOW YOU REACH THE HEARTā and my brain short circuited completely and I have no idea how it ends because I realized there was 30 pages left and my soul couldnāt take it. I emailed the chief editor like ?????!!!!!!????!!!!!! and the book was immediately pulled from the work line and the author dismissed from the publishing house. Turns out she was a friend of a friend and that was how she got the manuscript past our entry levels for requirement.
And thatās the story of how an author sent me death threats for over a month because I stopped her shitty vampire porn from ever seeing the light of day. Youāre all fucking WELCOME.
dragonborn: ah yes, the poison. the poison of weakness to poison. the weakness to poison poison. that poison?
Next Time Youāll Know Better
by reddit userĀ IPostAtMidnight
Have you ever walked into a room and found a vampire?
No, not the sexy kind, but a foul creature with bony limbs and ashen skin? The kind that snarls as you enter, like a beast about to pounce? The kind that roots you to the spot with its sunken, hypnotic eyes, rendering you unable to flee as you watch the hideous thing uncoil from the shadows? Has your heart started racing though your legs refuse to? Have you felt time slow as the creature crosses the room in the darkness of a blink?
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ā¦ā¦.FUCK! I do that all the time!! I havenāt been feeling too well lately eitherā¦ā¦
GOODBYE. GOOD FUCKING BYE.
GOD FUCKING DAMNIT NOT THIS SHIT AGAIN
Okay but really, this one will freak you out. Itās short and not a word is wasted. This is brilliant horror right here. But seriously, if youāve got bad paranoia, probably donāt read this at night. Or maybe at all.
Instant favorite.
What if there are are no time travelers from the future, simply because there is no futureā¦
no homo. weāre fresh out. we should get a new shipment in on monday
can you check in the back