Books are home.

"Good book don't give up all their secrets at once." ~ Stephen King "Books are the plane, and the train, and the road. They are the destination, and the journey. They are home." ~ Anna Quindlen "A great book should leave you with many experiences, and slightly exhausted at the end. You live several lives while reading." ~ William Styron

[read-in-order-to-live]

When at least 20 books are still waiting for me on a shelf:

Me: I need to go to the workshop. I have nothing left to read!

[read-in-order-to-live]

Title: Heart of the Gladiator (Affairs of the Arena #1)

Autor: Lydia Pax

Notation: 5 stars

Style: Historical Romance

Synopsis:

His love was rough, but it could not be tamed... or denied. Aeliana hates gladiators. They’re crude, violent, arrogant, and will toss the skirts up of any available woman after a fight. It may be her job to treat their injuries, but she has no interest in being just another conquest. So, when the former gladiator champion Caius arrives in her life, she is stricken by how immediately she falls for him. He's a merciless killer in the arena, not at all her type. But he’s also damnably handsome, built like a god, and turns Aeliana on like nothing she’s felt before.

Being with a gladiator is always a bad idea. Even if they’re known the Empire over for the intensity of their bedchamber passions, they have a lifespan about as long as a sword. Aeliana’s convinced that there’s no way that someone who could have any woman in Rome would want to stay with her for long. But his affection, while rough, seems completely genuine. Caius’s return to the arena is shrouded in mystery, but the more Aeliana discovers, the more she falls in love. When his lifetime of violence catches up with them both, Aeliana must decide whether she can afford to bare her heart to a man so effortlessly dangerous. As it becomes obvious that their love shouldn’t be, Caius and Aeliana fight the odds like warriors in the arena. Aeliana's strength will be tested again and again, along with their love. But it is her strength that will win the heart of a gladiator.

Commentary:

~~ Thank you to the author for having kindly provided me an ARC of this book for an honest review. ~~

Usually, I don’t read stories about gladiators as they can be harsh with violence and I’m not fond of that. So, I started to read this book with some hesitation but... I shouldn’t have!

This book is truly great, with the just amount of violence, of suspense, of sensuality and of love.

The historical part is amazingly told, greatly detailed, allowing us to merge fully in the background, to enjoy wholeheartedly the story. We are in Puteoli and we can totally imagine living there. When Aeliana walks in the market, it’s as if we walk next to her, during the moments on the underbelly of the arena, it’s as if we could feel the atmosphere of the place.

The characters are a strong part of the quality of the story. Each of them is interesting, well worked. You can’t stay insensible with them: you love them, you hate them, you feel both... they all prompt reactions from the reader and that’s a great thing!

The love story is also a strong interest in the story. I loved the fact that it was an important part of the plot but that it doesn’t overwhelm everything. Also the fact that even if there are some sensual scenes between the heroes, they are not too detailed and not too harsh was a good thing, being a sweet add to the story and not tainting it.

To continue with the good balance between the theme in the Heart of the Gladiator, even if Caius and Aeliana relationship is beautifully written and very attractive, it’s not the central part of the story; others themes are well developed too! The brotherhood of the gladiators, the rivalry between the different ludus, the resentment some can feel and the consequences to such hatred... the relation between a father and his daughter in a world when violence was common and almost the first rule in life...

Now, I’m afraid there will be a lot of spoilers so if you don’t have read the book for now, please, don’t read anymore. To be honest, the part I really dreaded to read was the combat between Caius/Lucius and the tiger/bear. I can't stand seeing – or reading - an animal being hurt even if it's only fictional. So, when I started to read this moment, I was ready to let the book down. But it turned out that this fight is wonderfully written, with a lot of suspense, a lot of details that make it real and fascinating– not gore or bloodshed details though. So, I continued to read the book ^^

As I said earlier, the relationship between the characters are a strong quality of this book. Each character is deeply worked, their interaction with others enthralling and so true. The feelings the author make you feel are real, deep, giving credibility to the characters and to the situations.

I love the relationship between Caius and Aeliana:

I'm not really fan of the « love at first sight » thing usually, especially cause often the authors made the heroes give way to their desire and passion to quickly for my taste. But in this case, it's different.

I enjoyed so much the way Miss Pax writes this love story. Of course, you can feel the pull between them since the beginning. But they build their relationship slowly, sweetly, with tease and friendship, with consideration and respect.

"Perhaps I shall call on you later and you can tell me more of how I am a fool?" There was a way to say such a thing and be biting about it - to be cruel and petty. And yet there was also a way to say it in a jovial, happy manner, and this is how Caius clearly meant it. She just smiled and nodded and returned on her way. (page 16)

They not let their feelings and desire take the best part of them. They talk a lot, are here for each other even if they burn for each other.

”The reasons why I’m here. I have a daughter, Fabia. As things stood, I was too poor to give her the life she deserves. I fight for her. She’s the only thing in this life I have worth fighting for.” She responded without thinking. “And dying for?” ”Especially that. Only that, if it means a good life for her.” (page 46) ”I...” she stumbled her words now, lost in the deep dark pools of his eyes. Gods, but there was so much want there. “I should really enjoy speaking at length about any subject you may choose.” ”I know.” ”But... but. I don’t think that’s what you’re really after.” ”I was right. You are intelligent.” (page 114)

And when finally, they let their love openly revealed, they find something to fight and live for !

”You told me that your daughter was the only thing worth fighting for. Dying for.” ”Yes.” ”And what if you had another?” She clasped his hands tight to her chest. “What if you were alive and well, for me? I love you, Caius. I want to stay with you. I want you to stay with me. Slave or not. We can be together. So we should. That’s what I think.” ”You love me, truly?” ”Yes. Don’t you love me?” ”Of course I do, Aeliana. Of course I love you. I just -” She closed the space between them, kissing him hotly. ”Then live,” she said finally. “Live for me. Fight for me.” (page 208-209)

The relation between Aeliana and her father was a part that moved me a lot. At first, his father is harsh with her, using horrible words that hurt terribly Aeliana as she still loves her father.

”And yet still she could not shake the need to make him proud. Despite everything, despite all his harsh words and stern looks, all his doubts and sabotage, she could not help but love him. It was a weak love, stretched long and thin, but somehow it remained intact. She had been born with love for him, and whatever reserves existed there had not yet been exhausted.” (page 75) Aeliana set the letter down, Then, finally, put her head in her hands, finally, you and did her very best you will be doing honourable work. not to cry. (page 75-76)

But at one point, she succeeds to face her father, showing him that she is not the feeble person he thought she was. And she finally wins him when she writes him her letter asking him to help her save Caius and Fabia.

”Your father has been saying nothing but good things about you for the whole day during the matches. ‘Look at this one. See his shape? My daughter’s work.’ ‘You see that scar? Healed by my daughter.’ And so on.” (page 221)

And then something miraculous happened. As the two stepped down the stairs to the underbelly to retrieve Caius, Vitus grabbed her hand. At first, she thought he might be steadying himself from falling. But not. The hand stayed there, Vitus looking straight ahead, and he squeezed firmly before letting go. (page 224)

I loved so much the moment in the epilogue when Vitus confesses to Caius how he regrets the way he raised his daughter.

« You are good with your own daughter.  […] I tried for much strength with mine. I do not know that... » Vitus drifted. His eyes settled on Fabia, tugging at the hair of her doll. « I think there are better ways. » (page 227)

The relationships between Caius and his fellow gladiators - Septus, Lucius, Conall – and the others members of the ludus – Murus and Iunius – are also an important part of the book. They live together, they fight together, not only for the glory of their ludus and their dominus but also for their own glory and the prospect of maybe someday being free.

”That friend is your brother. And he saved your life in the arena, more than three times over. And you ought to be grateful.” (page 168)

They are rough together, they not share their feelings for the other, but they have each other back, particularly when they understand that Caius daughter's life is threatened.

”Whatever you need doing, we will do.” The gathered crowd all voiced their assent, patting Caius on the back and shaking his hand. He had never felt such assurance from a group before. It was gratifying to feel he had not worked unnoticed. (page 196) He didn’t know what to say. It had been one overwhelming moment after another. Place him in an arena full of men trying to kill him, and he was right at home. But in a room full of men wanting to help him, and he felt as lost as a dove in a snowstorm. (page 196) Iunius shrugged. “Sometimes there are more important things than sums.” ”Watch out, Iunius,” Lucius chuckled. “You may have morals in you yet.” (page 214)

What moved me was how they rejoice with the good fortune of their brothers. Of course, longing could be here in their heart but they know how much pain and suffering they all share together and seeing one of them free is a piece of hope for them.

The underbelly of the arena was full of joy. Gladiators always loved to celebrate when other gladiators were freed. It gave them hope - something to live for, and something to fight for. Cheers for Caius – sometimes for Ursus – were constant and loud. The din shook the stone foundations, dust trembling from the ceiling. (page 224) Gladiators cheered all around Caius and Aeliana. Their kiss was long and sweet, a victorious embrace. (page 225)

The relation between Caius and Flamma was one I really enjoyed. At first, Flamma hates Caius deeply and even tries and kills Caius on a fight. He is rough, harsh, brutal and ready to do everything that Portia asks him to do... well, not really everything as when she asks him to burn Caius' shoulder with the brand, he doesn't want to. As he has no choice in the matter, he finally does it but as lightly as he can. And afterwards, he can't stand the idea that Caius could think it was his idea, reason why he earnestly apologises to him.

“It wasn’t my idea,” said Flamma. [...] “It does matter.” Flamma put his hands on his hips. “You listen to me. It matters.” [...] “Hey.” Flamma squatted down. “I’m trying to talk to you, here. It wasn’t my idea, you see? She pushed it on me. She said it would be nothing. Just to scare you.” [...] “I just wanted you to know my side of it.” (page 132-133)

Flamma can be brutal but he is also loyal and takes Caius side when Fabia is threatened. He perhaps not like Caius but he doesn't want to be part of something so low.

“I may be a bastard.” Flamma nodded. “But I’ve got a few bastards too. If their mothers would let me near them, I’d do anything for them.” (page 197)

Portia's character is well defined by Aeliana thoughts :

“Do we understand one another, slave?” Aeliana looked down. The ground was covered with dirt. It was all dirt in this place. All so dirty. “Yes, Domina.” (page 92)

For her Portia is like dirt... and that's so true. The way this woman manipulates everyone, always putting her interest at the first place, ready to hurt everyone around her as long as she gains what she wants and has her revenge... It is the most hateful person in this book and the author writes her incredibly well... you can help loathing her !

Truly, this book is a great mix of suspense, adventure, love, friendship. As soon as I started it, I couldn't put it aside and I know that I will reread it as soon as I could.

The author told me that the Affairs of the Arena are a trilogy and that each book can be a stand alone. Maybe... but I already know that I am looking forward to read the others two stories !

Quotes :

“You don’t sound sorry.” “Well.” Her feet shifted. “I am. I don’t like to offend others.” “But you do like to voice your opinion.” Her hands shifted down to her hips. " Yes". "It seems those two desires would often run over each other." (page 14) "Don't call her that," said Lucius. " She doesn't like it." "What, Faun? Isn't that her name?" Septus turned to Aeliana. "Isn't that your name?" "It's Aeliana," said Caius, " and it's very lovely." There was that flush again, creeping an tugging at her neck, like the knowing grip of a long-time lover. Lucius turned to Aeliana with a great grin on his face. "Oh my. You two did come in together, didn't you? Have you been prancing about with the bear, little faun?" "You just told me not to call her that." Septus frowned. "You said it as her name. I said it in jest. It's a world of difference." (pages 42-43) “You like someone, you tell them. Life is short. And shorter here than in most places, from what I can tell. You should kiss him before someone kills him.” That, thought Aeliana, was exactly why they would not kiss. What was it with men in her office telling her to kiss Caius? Was he running a campaign? First Lucius and then this one. (page 84)

“Will you do this for me, please Chloe? It’s important. He is hurt and he needs help.” "Of course I won’t, Aeliana,” she said, smiling. “He’s going to do it himself.” Smart girl, Aeliana thought again. (page 103)

She was going to kiss him, she decided. She would kiss him just this once and if he kept saying such nice things then really she would have no choice but to continue kissing him until he shut up. That was the only way she was going to get him to stop making her feel this way with all those glorious words - by kissing him as thoroughly as possible. Yes. A perfectly logical conclusion. (page 115)

Never had she imagined that she would be in love. But her heart burned for Caius like nothing she could have imagined. The spark had been set off in exactly the right place, under exactly the right conditions. Every breath she took belonged to him and him alone. With the knowledge he was alive - and that he would thankfully not have to fight for many moons yet - there was only joy in her heart. Soon, they would find one another in a hidden corner of the ludus. (page 164)

This was love. But she couldn’t say it. Saying such things aloud too soon ruined them - and this was a feeling she could not bear to ruin. (page 181) It had been smart of him, he rationalized, to tell her that he didn’t love her. Another part of him circled like a fly, refusing to go away and demanding to be noticed. That if he was to die soon anyway, better to tell her the full amount of his feelings for her. Better to live every moment he could. (page 194) I love you, she wanted to say, but the words wouldn’t come. He kissend her, instead, drawing her close into his naked strength with everything he had. Their lips locked only for a few brief, delightful seconds. (page 201)

“Don’t hold your breath, little Faun” said Lucius. “It won’t help. And you might faint.” ”Just because I am a woman doesn’t mean I’ll faint.” "No. You’ll faint because you keep holding your breath. Stop it.” (page 213)

[read-in-order-to-live]

Title: Abeille  -   Honey-Bee

Autor: Anatole France

Notation: 5 stars

Style: Fairy Tale

Synopsis:

Abeille and Georges are two children who had been raised as brother and sister(knowing they weren't) but who loved each other dearly since the first time they met.

Once, while they were walking to a forbidden lake, they disappeared from the face of the earth for 7 long years.

Abeille is kept captive by the merry dwarfs while Georges is raised by the wonderful undines.

Commentary:

This book is one of my mother's favorite when she was a child and had been given to her by her own mother.

My mother decided to read it to me to make me discover a really beautiful treasure of the French literature.

"Abeille" is a very sweet fairy tale, written for children but very enjoyable for grown-up too as long as they kept a children soul.

Don't hesitate to read this beautiful story if you can 'cause you will have a very pleasant time doing so. And most of all, share this book with children, I'm sure they will appreciate this journey with you.

Others Covers:

[read-in-order-to-live]

Title: The Winter Rose

Autor: Jennifer Donnelly

Notation: 5 stars

Style: Victorian Romance

Synopsis:

When India Selwyn Jones graduates from the London School of Medicine for Women in 1900, she is advised to set up her practice in a fashionable neighborhood.

Instead, the idealistic India chooses to work in the East End, particularly in the awfully dangerous WhiteChapel district, serving the poor.

There, India meets Sid Malone, one of London's most notorious gangsters. Before long, an unpredictable, passionate, and bittersweet affaire ensues.

Commentary:

It's the second times I read this book, first in French and this time in English. Always a real pleasure. It's like I discover it anew everytime I read it!

This story set in Victorian London, in full of adventure, angst, love, sadness, hope... in short, a true roller-coaster of emotion.

The characters are deep, strong, and the story is the same. What moved me the most - I think except of course the main love story - is the depiction of Whitechapel in 1900.

Mrs Donnelly immerses us in a living hell; the condition of the poor is simply amazingly portrayed with all its brutality, its atrocity, its despair... but also with the pride parents tried to preserve to help their children to hold on and the hope they tried to feel even when everything seems too far gone.

At first India comes to Whitechapel with a full mind of idealism and a full medical bag of nutrition advice leafs...to finally discover that she was on the wrong; Whitechapel with its desperate citizens can't be helped if she works by the book. She needs to discover who her patients are, how they live, why they live the way they do and only then will she be able to help and cure them.

This book shows us - among other themes - the long journey India will have to do go through to fulfill Sid Malone's words:

"You're a good doctor. Do you want to be a great one?"

Now, I’m afraid there will be a lot of spoilers so if you don’t have read the book for now, please, don’t read anymore.

Mrs Donnelly is an excellent writer and her way to describe her characters is simply excellent.

Each of them is deep, moving with their skills and flaws, their past and their hopes, their fears and their failures.

Even Frankie Betts or Freddie Lytton succeed to touch me at one point or another because of how desperate they feel, of their terrible past and the awful and profond scars it let them. .

Of course, India and Sid's love story is what I loved the most in this book because of the passionate way their relation is tell and how deep and full with fire their love is.

One of my favorite moment's about the two of them is when India stays at Sid's side after she operated him. I love how she confides in him things she never told anyone while she can't bear the sight of him:

Her gray eyes sparked with passion as she spoke. Sid looked into them and for a second he glimpsed her soul. He saw what she was - fierce and brave. Difficult. Upright. Impatient. And good. So good that she would sit covered in gore, shout at dangerous men, and keep a long, lonely vigil - all to save the likes of him. He realized that she was a rare creature, as rare as a rose in winter. (page 126)

She closed her eyes again and buried her face in her pillow. She wrapped her arms around it, squeezing it tightly. "Ouch," the pillow said. "That's me sore spot, luv." [...]She was at the hospital. With a patient. With Sid Malone. And it appeared she had fallen asleep on him. "Oh, God... sorry," she babbled. "I fell asleep. I slept. Here. With you-" "Just a minute, missus," Sid cut in. " That's how rumors get started. I've me reputation to consider. You were not sleeping with me, all right? You were sleeping on me. It's a different thing entirely." (page 141)

How they struggle with their relationship is also a very interesting thing. First Sid Malone is a villain while she is on the "good side". They come from totally different backgrounds and they can't understand each other sometimes because it's like having be raised on two different worlds even if the sadness and the loneliness are similar to the both.

[...] for an instant it wasn't night and he wasn't here with Madden and Griz...[...] He was by the sea. With India. And it was morning. He quickly pushed the image out of his mind. He'd been thinking of her constantly since the night he'd kissed her in Whitechapel. And he didn't want to. She'd hurt him, made him feel like a fool. But worse than that, she'd make him love her. He could forgive a woman a lot of things, but he couldn't forgive that. (page 252)

But the main issue comes to India; since she has lost Hugh, her youth love, she can't let herself get close to anyone. She is too afraid to feel again at the risk to suffer again.

She knew that if she had cried for Miss Milo, if she had leaned her head upon his chest, he would have let her. There would have been no words, just his strong arms around her, his cheek pressed against her own. And she knew that she'd wanted his warmth just then, his touch, more than she'd ever wanted Freddie's. She knew it, and it terrified her.(page 177)

I also liked a lot the idea of Sid's redemption, of what he was ready to do to redeem himself from his past sins. And my heart broke everytime I saw how desperate he was to escape knowing how difficult his situation was.

He wanted to stay like this, with the sweet weight of her in his arms, with ther needing him. He wanted to keep walking with her, out of this unforgiving city, out of his unforgiving life. He wanted to walk all through the night, then sit with her somewhere radiant and beautiful in the morning. By the coast. At the water's edge. Where the stiff salt breeze would blow away the stench of his sins and the sea would wash him clean. (page 226)

He felt anguised. He would have given anything to be able to do what she asked of him - to turn his back on his life and start again. With her. But he knew it was impossible. Althought he didn't say it out loud, because he didn't want to upset her, he knew that once you were in his world, you never got out. Unless it was in a pine box. (page 354)

Most of all what I loved about this couple is that both Sid that India are ready to fight for protecting the other. They are ready to lose everything to help the other, to save the other from their inner demons or from their outside perils.

Their love is not as easy one, it's almost an impossible one from the start but they didn't give up. They feed their hope, they launch all their strength in it because it's the only thing worthing to fight for.

Sid needed her and she would be there for him. Loving him. Protecting him. No matter what it took, no matter what she had to sacrifice, they would begin again. There were beginnings, not only endings. She would show him that. Make him believe it. They would leave the past behind. No one would hurt him ever again. He was hers now. Hers. And she would never let him go. (page 385)

The last night they's spent together at Arden Street - the night he'd told her about his past - he'd felt something kindle deep within himself. Something bright and warm and perilously fragile. It was a feeling. One he'd lived without for years. One he'd forgotten. But one he still recognized. It was hope. (page 406)

Even separate they can't stop loving each other, thinking to each other. Simply because without the other, they are incomplete.

He didn't dare use Malone, and Baxter - the name he's used at Arden Street with India - had come out of his mouth before he could stop it. He wished he'd said Smith, Martin, anything but Baxter. He'd wanted to forget India, forget what they'd had. Now he was reminded of her every day of his life. (page 498)

"I'll wake up and think I dreamed this," he said. "Tomorrow. When I have nothing again." "We'll have this," she said. "This day. This memory. This love. No one can take that from us. I know you're alive, Sid. That's so much more than I had." (page 619)

I liked how in just some words the author makes us feel the abominations prisoners had to bear; enough words to make us shiver at the thought. I thank her to not have describe more because it would have been too difficult to read.

In those words, the book shows us how deeply wounded Sid was after his journey in jail. Frankie Betts's words at the end of the book made me so sad when he remembered the advices Sid gave him:

He told me that scars on the outside are nothing compared to the ones they'll put on the inside. He was right. Why didn't I listen? (page 574)

Fiona and Joe's story is also a pretty good one. I haven't read "The Tea Rose", the prequel of "The Winter Rose" which is telling the start of their relationship but it wasn't necessary to appreciate this couple.

They are two strong and fierce characters wanting to fight for their dream: to improve greatly the life of the WhiteChapel's citizens for him, and to save her brother - now known as Sid Malone - from his villain life and get back her beloved brother, Charlie Finnegan.

What I liked the less on this amazing book is probably Seamie/Willa's relationship.

Don't get me wrong; it is well written and all the part of their journey to the Kilimandjaro and what happens next is really interesting but I just couldn't really "ship" them.

"Who is she to you?" Seamie stared down at his clasped hands. "No one special. Just the love of my life."  (page 635)

Nevertheless, I was happy that Mrs Donnelly gives a light of hope in this sad story. Cause even if Willa doesn't want to see again Seamie, even if she lost her leg, she continues to fight! I was afraid she would give up her life, trying to kill herself and was relieved when Seamie tells us that "she wants to see Everest".

She continues to pursue her dreams and I am grateful to the author for this note of hope and light in the terrible tragedy Willa had to suffer.

Maybe because I would have loved to see more of Sid/India's interactions instead, I don't know.

The relationship with the Finnegan's siblings was also really interesting. I loved how Fiona, Charlie/Sid and Seamie acted when they were together, close as ever even if they had been separated for so long and even if so much had happened since the last time they were together.

"That's all?" Fiona said. "Charlie's leaving and never coming back, and that's all he said? 'Hope you find the North Pole'?" Seamie shrugged. "It's blokes, Fee," he said. (page 479)

And of course, I was in love with the whole Moskowitz's family! How couldn't I? They are a bunch of wonderful persons, each of them; Yanki and his songs, Ella and her temper, Posy and her cuddles... without forgetting Mrs Moskowitz of course! This woman is amazing: she welcomes India as one of hers, gives her place to open her clinic, has always the good words at the right moments, is loving and caring and so brave!

"You must miss your home," she said to her. Mrs Moskowitz shook her head. "No, my dear," she said, smiling. "I never left it." She nodded at her husband, her children. "My home is where they are." (page 249)

Mrs Moskovitz's words came back to her. " You do not choose love. Love chooses you." And as they did, India realized she had her answer. Love had chosen for her. And love had chosen Sid. (page 250)

"Thank you. Truly. But it would be impossible." Mrs Moskowitz reached across the table. She covered India's hand with her own: "With all respect, my dear India," she said, "I look to God to tell me what is possible. Not to you." (page 325)

As always when I love a book, I couldn't stop talking about it. I hope at least I give you desire to read it!

Anyway, this is a story I love to read and probably will read again before long. This journey from the dodgy area of Whitechapel to the huge plains of Kenya and from the deepest despair to a place "where the sky touches the sea... where the world begins" is one of the most beautiful I ever read.

It is an ode to the Hope, a way to help fighting even if sometimes life seems too rough to bear because someday, at one point, we will find what we have always waited for:

"The story ends happily, then?" [...]"It does, Mr. Baxter," she said. "It has." (page 707)

Quotes:

"I'm going to get some beef tea into you, if I have to strap you down to do it." "Promise?" India rolled her eyes. (page 142)

"It's my job, Mr. Malone," she quickly said, brushing his gratitude off. "Ah. Your job. Of course." [...]Sid looked at India, who looked away. "Why, Dr. Jones, I do believe you care," he said. "You may believe whatever you like." (pages 142-143)

"You went to far, Mr. Malone. You shouldn't have said what you did. You shouldn't have kissed me; It was highly improper. I imagine you enjoyed yourself immensely, but-" Sid snorted. "Don't flatter yourself." India looked so hurt that he immediately regretted the remark. He was about to say so, when he heard laughter. It was Frankie. He'd forgotten all about him. (page 221)

She put her arms around him and held him tightly. He tired to push her away again, but she wouldn't let him. She felt him dig his fingers into her back, felt his body shudder, then heard his sobs, harsh and tearing. His tears were hot against her skin. She held him and rocked him, whispered to him and kissed him and cried for him, but she did not let him go. (page 382)

"All this, India... all this because of a bloody criminal. I don't understand." India, doomed and heartbroken, smiled at him. "No, you don't,"  she said. "You couldn't, Freddie. It's called love." (page 477)

"Hello, Mr. Baxter. How do you do?" Sid turned around slowly, ever so slowly. He lifted his eyes to hers and quietly said, "Not so well at the moment. And you, Mrs. Baxter?" (page 586)

[read-in-order-to-live]

Title: The Kiss of a Stranger

Autor: Sarah M. Eden

Notation: 5 stars

Style: Regency Romance

Synopsis:

When Crispin, Lord Cavratt, thoroughly and scandalously kisses a serving woman in the garden of a country inn, he assumes the encounter will be of no consequence.

But he couldn’t be more mistaken— the maid is not only a lady of birth, she’s the niece of a very large, exceptionally angry gentleman, who claims Crispin has compromised his niece beyond redemption. The dismayed young lord has no choice but to marry Miss Catherine Thorndale, who lacks both money and refinement and assumes all men are as vicious as her guardian uncle.

Trapped between an unwanted marriage and a hasty annulment, which would leave his reputation tainted and Catherine’s utterly ruined, Crispin begins guiding his wife’s transformation from a socially petrified country girl to a lady of society.

Their unfolding relationship reveals encouraging surprises for both of them, and privately, each of them wonders if theirs may become a true marriage of the heart.

But their hopes are dashed when forces conspire to split asunder what fate has granted, and as a battle of wits escalates into a life-threatening confrontation, will it be possible for Crispin and Catherine to live happily ever after?

Commentary:

I read this beautiful book in less than 2 days because I couldn't put it aside. "The Kiss of a Stranger" is a real delight to read, full of emotion, tears, laugh, love and sorrow.

It was the first book of Sarah M. Eden I read but I'm actually looking forward to read another one because she is really talented and her characters sound so real that you can't read this book without feeling every emotions they feel.

The plot of two strangers forced to wed each other while not having the less feelings for each other is certainly not a new one but I really liked the way the author describes the situation and makes us share the characters' fellings.

Now, I’m afraid there will be a lot of spoilers so if you don’t have read the book for now, please, don’t read anymore.

The characters on this book are really strong, beautifully written and full of real feelings.

Crispin is a gentle man with a real struggle to admit his feelings as he is afraid to recognize them and by doing that to put himself in danger. Sometimes he can't restrain his temper particularly when he is jealous, an emotion he had a lot of difficulty to bear.

I love how he depicts himself as a knight in rusted armor wanting nothing more than to help his wife but totally awkward with his "trapping". He is full of humour and self-mockery.

He is human with a lot of weaknesses but with a real strong; his gift to reassure, comfort, love her and make her laugh.

"I won't let him hurt you. I would never let him hurt you." (loc 2218)

"The sole purpose of a cravat is for crying into." Crispin felt a tremendous amount of satisfaction serving as a shoulder to cry on. (loc 2224)

"For another thing, you turned me to a life of crime." He felt her laugh. "I thought we agreed your mother bore the blame for your tendency to steal pastries." "Either way, I have become a hopeless criminal - most ladies would object to that." "As well they should." (loc 4136)

I was particularly moved by Catherine; the author makes us really feel all the insufferable things the young lady had to bear, the violence with which she lived for eight years and the terrible fear, the feeling of inadequacy and awkwardness that such trials can make one's feel for the rest of one's life. I couldn't sometimes catch hold of my tears because of the truth of the feelings related.

She for the first time in eight years feels safe at Crispin's home and particularly in presence of her Lord husband. Of course, sometimes Catherine can't understand his shift of mood and that lets her troubled by the certainty he doesn't like her as much as she loves him. But at time, she feels so close to him, so safe with him that she allows him to tease her and even dares to answer him on the same tone. I simply love their banter about the fairy cake and the one about the cream made me smile so much!.

"The Glaffords will be in attendance," Crispin said with a knowing rise of his brow. "Heaven help us all," Catherine muttered. "So I should bring my cream pitcher, then." "Malicious, Catherine." Crispin laughed, shaking his head. (loc 1458)

"[...] would you retrieve a fairy cake for your famished husband?" "Famished?" "A fairy cake may mean the difference between a long, prosperous life and expiring right here in the sitting room." "I would sorely hate to be a widow after only a couple weeks." [...] (loc 1779)

"Heaven help her, she was in love with him. What she wouldn't give to hear him say he loved her in return." (loc 3602)

"Furthermore, you threaten me with your fountain." "I'm shameless." He looked into her sparkling eyes and smiled despite himself. (loc 4142)

The supporting characters are too really well created and I liked them a lot: Lizzie and Edward, Crispin's sister and brother-in-law, Philip Jonquil, his best friend since their childhood, Hancock the old butler that treats his "master" and his lady wife as member of his own family.

There you have it, Lizzie. I am perfectly capable of taking care of her. Philip can find his own wife. (loc 2224)

"Face facts, old friend. You've committed the most inexcusable offense known to Polite Society." Crispin truly hated when Philip added dramatics to his already affected demeanor. "What would that be?" As if he needed to ask to get an answer. "You've fallen in love with your wife." (loc 3839)

Crispin rubbed his weary eyes. "She's all I think about", he admitted, a man beaten. "I miss her after ridiculously short separations. She looks in another man's direction and I'm jealous as a greenhorn. I'm willing to make a cake of myself just to see her smile or hear her laugh. It's pathetic." "Sounds like love to me." "It's torture." "Sweet torture." Was that a smirk on Philip's face? (loc 3856)

Hancock cleared his throat in an obvious attempt to stifle a laugh. (loc 472)

Hancock, though unwilling to offer any details - a change in loyalty that had Crispin wondering just what kind of spell Catherine had cast over his house - indicated that "her ladyship" was, indeed, awake but remained in her rooms. (loc 3077)

There are so many others aspects to talk about but I will not say something further and let you discover it!

This book is really a great moment like I already said it and I'm sure I will read it again soon because I want to enjoy again the story and the characters that I already love.

Quotes:

"Marriage really ought to come with an instruction manual" (loc 2052)

"Perhaps I should take out an advertisement. 'Found: one wife. Inquire at Permount House if interested." (loc 2071)

He adored that smile. She couldn't be completely opposed to their marriage. She wouldn't have turned to him for comfort nor felt reassured enough to laugh with him if she wanted nothing more than to be rid of him. (loc 3260)

"Oh, Crispin!" Catherine threw herself into his arms, precisely where he needed her to be. (loc 4127)

"To begin with, you've turned this home into a hothouse." "I can hardly be blamed for being irresistible." She was decidely irresistible. (loc 4134)

"I love you," Catherine whispered against his mouth several moments later. The old, rusted, battle-weary knight straightened his creaky armor as he bent his neck to kiss her once more. "And I will forever love you." (loc 4177)

[read-in-order-to-live]

Title: The Escape

Autor: Mary Balogh

Notation: 3,5 stars

Synopsis:

The Escape is Number 3 in the series the "Survivors' Club"

In this poignant novel of longing and salvation, a hopeful widow and a resilient war hero discover the promise of love’s magic and new beginnings.   After surviving the Napoleonic Wars, Sir Benedict Harper is struggling to move on, his body and spirit in need of a healing touch. Never does Ben imagine that hope will come in the form of a beautiful woman who has seen her own share of suffering. After the lingering death of her husband, Samantha McKay is at the mercy of her oppressive in-laws—until she plots an escape to distant Wales to claim a house she has inherited. Being a gentleman, Ben insists that he escort her on the fateful journey.

 Ben wants Samantha as much as she wants him, but he is cautious. What can a wounded soul offer any woman? Samantha is ready to go where fate takes her, to leave behind polite society and even propriety in her desire for this handsome, honorable soldier. But dare she offer her bruised heart as well as her body? The answers to both their questions may be found in an unlikely place: in each other’s arms. Includes Mary Balogh’s charming short story, “The Suitor.”

Resume from the Paperback edition.

Commentary:

I just finished this book and I can't understand or really explain why but I feel a little disappointed. As if something was missing, something I can't put words on.

I mean, I'm a huge fan of the author and this book doesn't cast doubt on Mary Balogh's talent, that's not that... cause it's really well written and the descriptions are, as always wonderful and moving.

I just... haven't been catch by the story.

Usually, I start one of her books and finish it the following day or in the worst case two days later. Here, I started it in the middle of july and when I was at the 3/4 of the book, I simply put it aside, waiting for better days. I only took it back yesterday to end it but the fascination, the infatuation wasn't here at all.

This story was not usual as for once, the hero is not the strong, handsome, perfect man but a broken, "cripled" one. Not perfect for sure but amazingly positive, strong-headed with a real desire to exceed his handicap, to have a "normal" life.

"I was not expected to live. You did not expect it, George, did you?" "On the contrary," the duke said. "I looked into your eyes the day you were brought here, Benedict, and knew you were too stubborn to die. I almost regretted it. I have never seen anyone suffer more pain than you." (loc 261)

Ben is really well described and his fight to survive is really interesting. I really liked Samantha's background and character too.

"We have something in common, you know," he told her, stopping abruptly before he reached the door. "I want to dance too. Sometimes it is what I want to do more than anything else in life." (loc 821)

I liked the idea of the "Survivors' Club", all those friends in bonds with the others because they had to fight the same battles and could understand each other so well, always being present one for the other.

"No one can ever solve anyone else's problems. But it always helps just to unburden oneself to listeners who really listen and know that glib answers are worthless." (loc 294)

"When I spent those years at Penderris Hall with my fellow Survivors, I had six confidants. They understood my thoughts and feelings because they were experiencing similar ones. They knew when to advise, when to laugh at me or cajole, when merely to listen..." (loc 1051)

Was it the fact that the hero was so injured that made me feel so awkward? I don't know but I don't think so. As an handicaped person myself, it was great to see a different story putting in the light people normally in the shadow.

I found in another review a sentence that I can apply to me to explain a little more what I feel :

I'm finding that I have to push myself to finish reading [it], because I don't feel the connection to the hero and heroine that I want to feel...

You can feel the connection between the characters and the love story is sweet and sometimes passionate though I really wasn't moved as I usually am with Mrs Balogh's work.

But some parts where really enjoyable and I liked the way Ben and Samantha first meet and their first thoughts about the other.

"It really was a shame that good looks and elegance and an overall appearance of masculine virility were wasted on such a nasty, cold, arrogant, villainous sort of man." (loc 460)

"It would have been more satisfying if he had been ugly. All villains ought to look the part." (loc 581)

"He had expected her to be ugly. She had looked ugly through her veil. She was, to the contrary, utterly, stunningly beautiful. And younger than he had estimated. (loc 679)

Don't get me wrong, this is a good book and I will probably like it more next time I will read it again but for now, the story leaves me with a feeling of incompleteness.

I was also a little surprised by the name of the heroine, it seems a little too modern to me.

But I found it funny when I discovered at the end of the book that the name had been picked up after a contest. The name of the winner should have been picked for one character but she prefered that her sister's name was selected, hence "Samantha".

I don't know for now if I will read the other parts of the "Survivors' Club" cause I am afraid to feel the same way with the serie as Mrs Balogh's writes each book of a serie in the same style...

Meanwhile, I have many others Mary Balogh's books to read ^^

Quotes:

"Pets become as much a part of one's family as the other persons in it," Beatrice agreed. "While our spaniel was still alive, on of my sons once accused me of loving her more than I loved him or his brother. And my reply was that sometimes she was easier to love. I was smothering my son with hugs while I was saying it, I hasten to add." (loc 722)

"It is never easy, ma'am, to decide which wounds are more severe than others." (loc 792)

"I want to live. I want to... to dance." (loc 796)

"If you had been [married] and you had died," she said, "would you have been shocked if your widow had wanted to dance three months later?" "I suppose," he said, lifting one finger to rub along the side of his nose, "at that point it would not have mattered much to me, ma'am, what she did. Or at all, in fact. [...] I suppose that, being human, I would have liked to think that she would grieve for a while too, but not indefinitely. But could she not have remembered me fondly while she smiled and laughed and danced?" (loc 796, 808)

"But he wanted to dance too." (loc 870)

"We will go into the garden and find a stick for you to chase. Though that is not a fair game at all, you know, for you never throw the stick for me to chase." (loc 1215)

"And so I am safe because I am a recent widow," she said. "But what if I were not still in mourning?" He stared at her for a few moments. "Then you would not seem safe at all,” he said. (loc 1482)

"We have to believe there is joy," he said. "In the meantime, we have to believe that our lives are worth living." (loc 2419)

"I fought hard enough to live," he said. "Now I have to prove to myself that the fight was for some purpose." (loc 4086)

He did not turn to look at her, but he smoothed a hand over Tramp's head. "Take care of her, you great wretch of a hound." (loc 4246)

"That all your life your heart will dance as your person did in that alcove before Christmas." (loc 4696)

[library-lessons-deactivated2014]

-via Books That Rock My World

[read-in-order-to-live]

  Title: The Last Praetorian

Autor: Mike Smith

Notation: 5 stars

Synopsis:

Commander Jonathan Radec is a man desperately trying to escape from the mistakes of his past. Now the owner of Vanguard Shipping, his primary concerns are trying to keep his ships flying and his crew alive. Let alone his undying love and concern for Princess Sofia Aurelius, daughter of the Emperor Marcus Aurelius, the jewel of the Galaxy. However, the shadowy Syndicate organisation has set their sights on the Commander and his business, having sent an amazing pilot and beautiful assassin to kill him, Miranda.

    Commentary:

As the book is a e-book, I give the location where to find the quotes I share here. I hope it will help you.

I started this book 4 days ago and finished it this morning at dawn. It was really difficult for me to put it aside when I needed it cause I was really immersed in the story. The Last Praetorian is the first of the "Redemption Trilogy" and if the two others books are of the same quality, this is going to be a really great trilogy! The story is strong, the plot twist really interesting, the characters personality strongly built-up. M. Smith succeeds greatly in writting amazing combat scenes, particularly those in space. I really like how the author describes the ships, the universe... it's as if you were there! There are a lot of emotion in this book, suspense, pain, love, tenderness and a lot of humor, welcome to lighten the tension. I really like too the flashback we find at some chapters, explaining us what happened between Jon and Sofia five years before the present time. The timeline is really well created so you're never lost and can enjoy every moment of the story. Now, I’m afraid there will be a lot of spoilers so if you don’t have read the book for now, please, don’t read anymore.

Concerning the humor part, I really like the relation between Jon Radec and Paul Harrington, his second in command at Terra Nova. Paul dares teasing shamelessly his boss who is a real part of his family as they know each other for years, are close together and, funny detail, John comes often reading bed times stories to Paul's children.

"Hey! It's no problem to me," Paul responded with a grin. "I just want to know who is going to be signing my paycheque if we ever have a power failure in this section of the station." "And here I thought you were gunning for the Chief Executive position."  "No way!" said Paul holding up his hands in defense, "The paperwork would kill me." (loc 927) The moment the door to medical slid shut, Paul leaned against the corridor laughing his ass off. "Oh, to see the look on your face when you walked in," Paul crooned. "If I only had a camera so I could store that look for future prosperity... and blackmail." Paul laughed. John only shot Paul a dirty look before replying, "I'm failry sure it says somewhere I am in charge, doesn't that mean I can fire your ass?" Paul only laughed louder. "So I assume we are going to forgo the rack and thumbscrews?" Paul inquiered. "Perhaps a dozen red roses and a box of chocolates instead?" Paul asked with another laugh. They had finally managed to put Paul's kids to sleep, which had involved complex negotiations, followed by a round of 'Good Cop, Bad Cop.' With Jon, as the more senior, threatening the kids that if they did not go to sleep he was going to space their teddy bear, they had agreed and settled fown to sleep. (loc 1938) "I cannot believe it", John stated in disbelief. "She mentionned she was thinking of going into politics the last time that I saw her." he said, thinking aloud. "Would that have been the time that she was clinging to you like a barnacle in tears?" Paul commented with a wide smirk. "Or the other time when she was throwing things at you and threatening bodily harm if you ever set foot within her sight again?" Paul was trying to suppress a laugh. (loc 2224) "Remember when Carol asks, it's all your idea." "Yeah, like she will ever believe that," Jon teased, slapping his oldest friend on the back. (loc 5303)

I particularly love the strong link Jon feels with his sword. It's like this Velerian sword was his soulmate, like a real part of him, the one he "trusts with his life", for real!

Jon remained silent, but inside he seethed at the thought of anybody touching his blade. Nobody, absolutely nobody else held that weapon but him. (loc 1286) As if time had slowed, Jon watched the blade descend towards him but he felt no fear, not of this weapon. The Emperor, Marcus Aurelius, had presented the sword to him personally a few years before on his promotion to Commander of the Praetorian Guards. The minute he felt the blade touch him for the first time it was as if a bolt of energy had been transferred from the blade into him. Something seemed to have clicked inside of him, as if part of his soul that had been missing his entire life was re-joined. From that day onwards the deadly weapon had never left his side, as if they were now one, a right hand to his left. Idly, for a moment, Jon considered doing nothing, wondering if the blade would simply bounce off him or even just pass through him. (loc 1312) He hesitated before reaching for the sword. He had not wielded this weapon since abandoning his oath to the Emperor, since he betrayed Sofia, since he turned his back on his old life. He did not feel worthy to possess such a weapon, but at the same time he could not part with it. The blade was part of him, part of his soul, and he could no more abandon it than cut off his right hand. So instead he had kept it close, but never touching it. However, now with possible intruders on his station, in his home, threatening people, families that he loved... Shoving aside his own fears and inadequacies he reached out and grasped the hilt of the sword, pulling the blade free from the desk. As always when holding this blade, his blood seemed to sing with the song of battle. Casting one more glance over his shoulder, outside the viewport, still dark with the inkiness of space, Jon departed for C&C. With his blade still wrapped firmly in his hand, the office door slid shut and sealed itself behind him. (loc 3826) However, the other part of John's nervousness was from having to leave his Valerian sword on the 'Light. It would have completely destroyed the façade they were trying to project of a married pair of young, independent traders. No trader would ever wear such a thing. Instead he had holstered at his side a standard pulse pistol, but Jon still felt naked without his sword. John knew it was supoerstitious nonsense but he honestly flet the blade protected him. John secretly feared that the day he died, the weapon would be out of his reach. (loc 5017)

The relation between Jon and Sofia is really beautiful, strong, funny, full of love and tenderness. I love how at first they seem to not stand each other while hiding their true feelings.

No matter how exasperating John found Sofia, he would have to confess, but only under torture, she was stunningly beautiful. (loc 170) "You know, it was my sister who encouraged me to join the Navy." John decided he did not want to consider the future, not when the present looked so dazzling. "Really?" Sofia asked, giving a weak smile and looking up into his eyes. "Really," John confirmed. "She told me I would one day become a famous navy pilot and marry a princess." "Really?" Sofia's smile broadened. "Really!" John insisted. "Although she was only six a the time, she thought I was a prince and told me I really needed to get a horse." (loc 262) "You never harmed me and I was never frightened by what you did. Ever since father made you head of the Praetorians I have always felt safe with you around, knowing no one could harm me, as they would have to go through you-my own white knight, with his magical sword." Sofia explained wistfully, with a hint of sadness. (loc 377) "For the moment let's just concentrate on getting you to Eden Prime safely. We can worry about what happens next after we arrive." "You won't leave me?" Sofia asked in a small voice. "Not unless you wish me to." John replied truthfully, but inside a little piece of his heart died. Upon her arrival Sofia would be crowned Empress and Jon would continue to serve her, just as he had her father, but never again would he hold her in his arms. (loc 604) "So what was all that about, in front of the clerk?" She asked sleepily. "Hmm" Jon responded, distracted by her smell. "Me strong warrior... you weak female," Sofia replied, with a giggle. (loc 1235) Suddenly her mind cleared and she stared into the dark brown eyes of a face she did not recognise. Not the misty grey eyes of the person that filled her thoughts and dreams. (loc 1273-1274) Even many years later, when thinking back on their first shared kiss, he wasn't sure how long they stood there so entwined-perhaps seconds, perhaps centuries, perhaps forever. (loc 3177) "This time I do not plan to let you out of my sight for a single instant. You seem to be a magnet for trouble whenever I am not around." "Me?" Sofia replied with a laugh. "What about you? All I asked for is a dinner and some dancing, and you start a brawl in the middle of the club. Anyway, if you plan on waching me all the time, where are you going to sleep?" she asked playfully. "With you," Jon shot back, with a heated gaze. "I'm not letting you out of my sight for a moment." The tight knot of fear and worry that had settled in Sofia's stomach when she agreed they change course to Memphis abruptly vanished. Suddenly she was looking forward to this excursion. (loc 4935) This time, however, instead of the disapproval she was used to seeing, his expression turned to a warm smile and he nodded his approval, with a simple "I like it." Sofia decided she liked this reaction almost as much and decided in the future she would just have to alternate, to keep him guessing. (loc 5005) "No!" she insisted firmy. "I am not going to leave you." She would not accept that future for herself. Better to stay here and die together with the man she had fallen in love with, than accept that future. "If you want me to go, then you have to come with me. Otherwise I am going to stay here, together with you," she insisted. (loc 5138)

Jon had no idea of how Sofia knew about events taking place at Terra Nova. In another time and place he might have been outraged at her impulsive intrusion back into his life. However, this was not the time or the place to look such a gift horse in the mouth. He would deal with Sofia another day, probably by pushing her against a bulkhead, professing his thanks and then kissing her senseless... assuming he lived through today." (loc 5408)

Paul and Miranda's relation is very nice as they trust each other, talk a lot and don't hesitate to tease the other. Not the same strong attraction Miranda experiences with Jon as she isn't attracted by Paul but something close to a brother-sister relationship that I find really sweet.

"Anyway, he was very grateful you survived the destruction of your ship. He said he would have been mortified if he killed anyone with such a great posterior," Paul added glibly frantically trying to nurse the engines into life. "He said what?" Miranda exlaimed in disbelief, completely forgetting about the approching threat and turning her full attention to Paul. "Uh..." Paul said, frantically trying to change the topic of conversation. "I probably shouldn't have mentioned that, should I?" (loc 3334)

"Let's get to the part you were discussing my ass." Miranda insisted, venomously. (loc 3334)

"Don't worry," Paul added reassuringly. "I am sure they will not be billing us for the damage." (loc 3362)

The relation between Jon Radec and his parents Irene and Ryan is very tenderly related too. The way they engulf him in their warm embrace when Jon and Sofia come to Altair is very nice, showing that even if the background on which Jon grew was not an easy one, he and his little sister were always surrounded by love and affection.

His parents gave anything to help him escape Altair and her poverty and Jon rewarded them much than they would ever realise as they don't even know what he does to them.

John stared at his father intently. This was entirely is fault, as he had planned to make detailed introductions before now. "Not a word son, not a word." His father exclaimed, wagging his finger at his eldest son before heading towards the bedrooms to prepare the guest room. "So what am I meant to do?" Jon asked the empty room rhetorically. (loc 2568)

The author really touched my heart by showing how close Jon and his father are. They hadn't seen each other for years but as soon as they meet again, they talk intimately, trying to understand each other, proving how much their relation counts for them.

"While I did sleep with her, once, just once, I'm not sleeping with her if you know what I mean?" "No," his father replied just staring at him, perplexed. "Look dad, we are both adults here, let me put this simply. I am not having sex with her!" Jon exclaimed loudly. (loc 2659) "Now don't get your knickers in a twist, son," Ryan replied and added with an evil grin. "And come to think of it, you stay away from your Princess's knickers." Jon just rolled his eyes and replied, "She's not my Princess, dad." "Could have fooled me, the way you two were drooling over each other earlier." "I don't know what you're talking about," John replied, desperately trying to change the topic. (loc 2728) "Now don't forget, I want you both home by midnight, and no necking in the cab," his father warned him seriously, which was rather spoilt by the grin that was threatening to split his face in half. "You are having far too much fun with this," Jon warned his father. "His father gave the accusation careful consideration before he replied, "Yep." (loc 2968)

Other thing that I really liked is how much his team loves and is devoted to Jon. The Praetorians and the Altair crew are fond of him, showing him a respect colored with awe, being ready to follow him to death, trusting him with their own life.

Unfortunately the rest of the crew did not share Jon's lack of self-worth. Paul knew with absolute certainty not one member of the crew was going to leave if Jon insisted on remaining behind to face the fleet alone. (loc 4665)

I have a crush on "Gunny", he is strong-builted, grumpy but he makes me think of a big teddy bear! I particularly loved when he loses his dare against Miranda when she kisses him. This moment is really fun.

This man tries to hide what he feels but he is really great and the kids on the station are sure of it!

The station's kids had been in awe of the Marine Sergeant, ever since Lieutenant Castle's daughter had recounted the story of how he had wasted the monster that was hiding in her bedroom wardrobe. (loc 4747)

Even the children present, while they did not understand the seriousness of the situation, agreed they were all better staying on the station with their parents. If the imposing marine sergeant promised them they would be safe, who were they to doubt him? After all, they had all heard what Gunny had done to the monster that was hiding in Lieutenant Castle's daughters wardrobe. Any bad people trying to get onto their station were going to be in big trouble! (loc 5312)

At first, I was a little anxious by Miranda's arrival in Jon's life. I can't say that I'm fond of love triangle and I really hoped we will not have to endure one as for me it was Jon-Sofia all the way!

Quite the reverse, I really liked what the author wrote about Jon and Miranda. Of course, the attraction is present, Jon is very attached to her and Miranda is head over heels in love with him; the kiss they share before his leaving is the best evidence of it.

But I really enjoyed the fact that Miranda realises that for Jon, there will always be Sofia, as proved when Jon and Miranda dance in his quarters and when after, she looks in the mirror, trying to understand what just happened. She is smart enough to feel that Sofia is a ghost haunting Jon with his approval.

And Jon knows perfectly well that even if he really cares for Miranda and even if at some point he thinks perhaps she could help him to feel better, he will never forget Sofia as she is a real part of him, as he can't think of anything or anyone else.

As his senior command staff filed out of the conference room, Jon's thoughts turned back to Sofia. It had been at least eight hours since he had last thought about her. Jon idly wondered if he was going to spend the rest of his life thinking about her. (loc 2293) "Please don't leave me," Jon cried desperately. "I have been so alone without you." Admitting it to himself at the same time as saying the words aloud. Twirling back, closer, Sofia touched her hand delicately to his chest, in the same fashion she did on the Imperial Star, she explained in a soft voice. "You have never been alone, Jon. I have always been with you, in here," she said laying her hand over his heart. [...] "I'm sorry," Jon said aloud. "I never wanted to hurt you, I love you..." Admitting it to himself, for the first time. (loc 4111)

As I think you have understood, I really loved this book and to be honest, I wanted so much to know the rest, I started the second book instantly after having finished the first! Sadly my tablet computer had shut down permanently when I finished writting this reveiw so I will have to wait to continue the second book :(

It is very difficult for me to find a good book of science-fiction without "magic" or "fantasy" things, with great adventures, without to many violence, too many graphic scenes of sex, with strong characters and a beautiful love story... but I find it on The Last Praetorian and I'm really glad I did it!

I really hope the 2 others books will be of the same quality!

Sometimes, I found there was to many repetitions of the same words ("hence" for example was one of them. I have the same issue myself with some words and when I write, I have to work a lot to do my best to fix it. It's probably why I noted that.) or some expressions, sometimes at the same page.

It's not a big deal but it is a little disturbing.

However, don't hesitate to read it, you will have a great moment of entertainment.

    Quotes:

The Commander was a man that nobody crossed twice-few lived past the first encounter! (loc 113) Jon teased her, liking the feel of ther hand in his and assuming he would be spared the usual penalty of death. After all, she touched him, not the other way around! (loc 267) At the end of the evening, Jon admitted to the princess she was right. Real coffee was far superior to the stuff served in the ship's canteen. He did not admit to the princess that her company was far superior to the coffee. (loc 267) Actually Jon was not entirely sure what the Emperor would do, but he was very much attached to his head and would prefer that it remain well attached. (loc 358) "Who knows?" The Emperor continued after a brief pause, giving Jon a knowing look, "She might meet somebody on Eden Prime and decide to settle down and start a family." Jon kept his face impassive but inside was debating what action he would take if any such suitor materialized. Thoughts of choking such a suitor to death felt very appealing. (loc 436) The chief was well connected with the fleet scuttlebutt and, like most, had heard the rumours whirling around about Commander Radec and the Emperor's daughter. Like most he had dismissed them as fantasy but, well, you could power a reactor with the sort of sparks those two were emitting. He cleared his throat-wich suddenly felt very dry. "Not a word, chief" Jon ordered. "Not. A. Word." He then followed the Princess into the Eternal Light to prepare the shuttle for departure. (loc 500) "Princess, it's been... fun." Sofia looked up, surprised at the kind words from the Praetorian. "Sofia. You can call me Sofia... anytime," she replied. "Sofia," Elsie replied, seeming to try out the name before she nodded in thanks. For a moment it seemed to Jon that an unspoken communication passed between the two women, then after a small nod from Sofia, Elsie once again turned her gaze towards Jon. (loc 777) "Yeah, well you grab a fighter and come up and fly against these guys," the Commander complained. "Anybody flying in a straight line for more than an instant is going to be flotsam!" With that he cut the channel and got back to trying to stay alive, shaking his head at the stupidity of fleet officers. (loc 828) As he engaged the FTL engines Jon gave one final long glance at the aft scanner. It reported the 58th was no more. Jon was all that remained of the squadron. The Last Praetorian. (loc 845) He wondered what is was about being human that made you always desire most the one thing you could never have. (loc 1558) "Anyway, Jon had no intention to returning the cargo, knowing full well what they had in mind for it. Hence he kept the ship and the cargo. Well, at least Jon managed to keep hold of the ship but not the cargo." He laughed at his obviously personal joke. (loc 1738) "I guess I was just a natural. I love flying," Miranda explained wistfully. "The only time I eer feel free is when I am flying." (loc 2128) As his senior command staff filed out of the conference room, Jon's thoughts turned back to Sofia. It had been at least eight hours since he had last thought about her. Jon idly wondered if he was going to spend the rest of his life thinking about her. (loc 2293) Wondering what life would be like if he could wake up every morning with her at his side. With a gentle sigh, he slid his body out from underneath hers to start his day, fully aware if he did not move soon he would find further excuses never to leave her bed. (2639) She could feel a growing knot in her stomach, as Ryan repeated Jon's words, describing this beautiful woman, with flawless skin, beautiful eyes and the grace and manner of a princess. Sofia could hear the words as if coming from Jon himself, conveying the love and affection he held for this woman. (loc 2878) "Excuse me? We are talking about the same person here? Commander Jonathan 'my word is my honour' Radec? He betrayed her? And you saw this with your own eyes?" (loc 4062) "Been seeing anybody recently?" "No, not since I betrayed and then abandoned my last girlfriend. You might have heard of her, no? She is now the Confederation President." (loc 4347) "We had to consider all the various tactical scenarios, sir," David responded stiffly. "I hope you did not discount invasion by armed hostile aliens then." "No, sir, there was a tactical scenario for that." "You're joking, right?" "No sir." (loc 4501) "Hence, we hope for the best but prepare for the worst." (loc 4533) As far as Paul was aware there were only two reasons why Jon still fought for his beliefs and ideals. The first was the love Paul knew still resided in Jon's heart for Sofia. Occasionally he would still see the spark in his old friend's eyes and a sad smile grace his face, and he knew Jon was still thinking about her, fighting to make the galaxy just a slightly better place for her, and maybe one day her children. The other reason... well, Paul did not need to see the hate smouldering across the table in Jon's eyes to guess the second reason. (loc 4627) Paul could only curse at history, duty, fate, whatever or whoever seemed so intent on keeping these two apart, and both miserable. (loc 4727) Paul idly wondered what Jon would do or say if it became common knowledge that Sofia was involved with someone. Probably wish her the best happiness, and go back to his office, dark and alone never to be seen or heard from again. (loc 4747) "Well Jon might think his life is not worth much, and does not care if he lives or dies. But I do, and I expressly forbid him to go and get himself needlessly killed." Paul had to smile at the statement, as it reminded him so much of the younger Jon and Sofia, when the impossible was just another day for them. (loc 4822) "Then I think it is high-time for Jon to find out who is really in charge," Sofia said with a predatory smile. Paul could only stare in horror at Sofia's smug look as he thought about the meeting between these two volatile personalities. They were going to either end up killing themselves, or naked and entwined over Jon's spacious desk, or possibly both! (loc 4839) Jon had no idea of how Sofia knew about events taking place at Terra Nova. In another time and place he might have been outraged at her impulsive intrusion back into his life. However, this was not the time or the place to look such a gift horse in the mouth. He would deal with Sofia another day, probably by pushing her against a bulkhead, professing his thanks and then kissing her senseless... assuming he lived through today." (loc 5408)

"But the knight errant only wins the heart of the fair Princess in fairy tales. We both know that does not happen in real life." (loc 5558)

"Who was it said, 'better to die with honour than live the rest of your life as a coward'?" Jon narrowed his eyes angrily. "Somebody has been telling stories that they should not be. Anyway I was far younger back then, I had no comon sense whatever." Miranda laughed heartily over the communication channel. "In that case you have not changed one little bit." (loc 5740)

With all the other alarms drowned out by the collision alert, Jon closed his eyes one final time. Suddenly the sight of Sofia, smiling, appeared in his mind's eye. Desperately, Jon took a tight hold of the apparition for one last time. This time to sustain him for an eternity. (loc 5922)

Not a word was spoken on the flight deck, the only sound the occasional cry from Sofia as the crew stood at attention saluting a man they had all respected and loved. A man who had made the ultimate sacrifice in order to ensure their lives. (loc 5997)

Looking at the stars Miranda wondered what it was about this view that drew Jon's attention time and time again, sometimes for hours at an end. Noticing her own reflection being projected back at herself, Miranda wondered if Jon had ever actually been looking outside, or instead contemplating his own, internal, demons. (loc 6012)

As the two women stared outside, separated by only a few feet, but from backgrounds light-years apart, both women's thoughts were affixed on the same man. One reflecting on a past that would now forever remain lost. The other reflecting on a future that now could never be. (loc 6012)

[read-in-order-to-live]

Title: The Temporary Wife

Autor: Mary Balogh

Notation: 5 stars

Synopsis:

Anthony Earheart, Marquess of Staunton, son of the Duke of Withingsby, twenty years old, leaves Enfield, the family estate, after a terrible fight with his father, swearing to never return again.

8 years after, Lord Anthony is summoned by his father to return home to see the Duke who is recovering from a serious heart attack, and to fulfill the promise of betrothal his father concluded for him seventeen years before.

Except that Lord Anthony doesn't want to obey his father. What better way to have his revenge that by arriving at his family home with his wife, a totally unfitting one, a wife his father would never accept because of her lower rank and fortune?

And how better way to choose this perfect dullest creature than by sending an advertisement to "hire" her as you would hire a governess ?

Of course, he has no desire to live with his "wife" all his life... No, it is a temporary agreement as a few weeks should suffice to annoy enough his father. After that, this "quiet mouse" would be send her way with five thousand a year, a home, a carriage and servants, all her year-by-year household expenses being covered.

Charity Duncan, eldest sister of 6 siblings, orphan, struggles with her brother, Philip, to gain their living and cover the debts her father established before dying. She can't find a work or at least keep one because of her tendency to state her own mind. When she finds an advertisement for a work as governess, she couldn't help but apply as it is her last chance to find one or she will be in need to go back to the country and take care of her young siblings.

When Lord Anthony meets the shy and reserved miss Charity Duncan, head lowered, hands on her lap, wearing the dullest brown dress ever, he is certain to have find the perfect applicant, the dullest quiet mouse ever...

Commentary:

I just ended The Temporary Wife and I am quite fond of it.

It is a regency novel book really beautifully written, with a real depth as by the storyline as by the characters.

I know, some might say the end and some events of the book are predictable but even if, the author succeed to make this story really attractive, pleasant and moving, a real enjoyment to read.

Now, I’m afraid there will be a lot of spoilers so if you don’t have read the book for now, please, don’t read anymore.

It been a while since I cry because of a book and this one made me weep two times:

- during the dinner before the "wedding ball" when Anthony tries to tear the necklet up Charity's neck, feeling every feelings the young woman feels, her incredulity, her sadness, her shame...

She hurried from the room with her head bowed. She was not even sure she would go up to her room to fetch her things. She was not sure she could bear to stay at Engfield even that long. (p. 177)

- at the old Duke death, particularly the emotional reunion between the Duke and Anthony.

He felt foolish weeping for a man he had hated - and loved, but he was powerless to stop the painful sobs that tore at him. And then the hand lifted and came to rest on his head. It moved once, twice, and they lay still while the rasping breathing continued. It felt like forgiveness, absolution, a blessing, a benediction, a healing touch. A father's touch. it felt like love. The marquess despised the feelings at the same time as he allowed them to wash over him. His father had touched him with love. (p. 207-208)

Anthony and Charity's relation is really beautiful. I love how things evolve between them and how the quiet brown mouse with her startling blue eyes wins little by little the Marquess's heart.

So much for his quiet mouse. She did not really exist, he suspected. (p. 88)

He gazed at her, his expression unreadable. He drew a deep breath at last. "And so to dinner, then, my little mouse," he said. (p. 179)

"A crusading little mouse," he said, relaxing his hold on her. "With her head in the clouds and her feet in quicksand." His face was stern and pale, but there was a certain tenderness in his voice. She had half expected a furious tirade. (p. 201)

Some events are really moving, making my heart melt and awed me with tenderness. Others are really funny.

"You should be asleep," he told her. Tomorrow will be a busy day." [...] "I have counted all the sheep in England," she said. He pursed his lips. "I had just started on those of Wales when you spoke," she said. "Now I shall have to begin all over again." He had expected a meek little "Yes, sir." (p42)

"I have never been so nervous in my life," she said, smiling at him during a lull in arrivals. He raised his eyebrows. He ever would have guessed it. She looked as if she had been standing in receiving lines for years. "Not even on your arrival here, my lady?" he asked. "Oh." She laughed. "I was not nervous then. I was terrified." (p. 182)

Their first kiss at the lake was particularly beautiful because even if they had already shared the married bed, that didn't involved their feelings as such this first touch of their lips... at this exact instant, their true feelings blossom, no longer repressed.

"Have you ever been kissed, little mouse?" "No." It was just a whisper of sound. [...] "Is this a lovely enough setting for the first?" he asked her. "Is the moment right? Is it the right man?" "Yes." When spoke the word, her lips brushed his. (p. 193)

And when Anthony comes to take his dearly wife back to home, I love the way he explains how much he needs her and how he can't live without her missing the most important to say:

"You really love me?" she asked wistfully. "The devil!" he exclaimed, looking over his shoulder. "Did I forget to say it? The thing I came to you?" (p. 244)

All the relations with the family are described with acuity, creating a tense atmosphere, allowing us to feel how much sadness and love this family hides behind their sober behavior.

"And are you really going to be like a papa?" she asked. "Like William is with Anthony and Harry?" "Do you want a papa?" he asked her. "Or would you prefer a big brother?" She did not hesitate. "I want a papa," she said. "Then I am he," he said. (p. 213)

"He loved you, dear," he said. "You were his own little girl. And now you are mine." (p. 213)

The Temporary Bride is really a breautiful story that I recommend to everyone and that I will certainly read again soon.

Quotes:

"You should be asleep," he told her. Tomorrow will be a busy day." [...] "I have counted all the sheep in England," she said. He pursed his lips. "I had just started on those of Wales when you spoke," she said. "Now I shall have to begin all over again." He had expected a meek little "Yes, sir." (p. 42)

Now her words suggested a certain sense of humor - or those eyes. He wanted her to be nondescript, devoid of character or personality." (p. 42)

"I like you in brown!" he said, his eyes sweeping her from head to toe. "They are loathsome garments, my lady. The sooner they find their proper place at the bottom of a dustbin, the happier I shall be. " (p. 126)

"We have a dinner to attend," she said firmly, "and a ball. Perhaps you are lacking in courage, my lord, but I am not. You ran away once and have never been able to outrun the demons or ghosts or whatever you may care to call them. You will not run again, I think, when you have taken a moment to consider." He gazed at her, his expression unreadable. He drew a deep breath at last. "And so to dinner, then, my little mouse," he said. (p. 179)

"I know the steps of the waltz," she told him as they took their places on the floor, "but I have never danced it. I hope I will not disgrace you and trip all over your toes or mine." "You will merely provide me with an excuse for holding you closer," he said. (p. 187)

"Where did you learn such foolish gallantries?" she asked, amusement rather than censure in her voice. "Here at Enfield," he said. "Today and yesterday and the day before." Steady, he told himself. Say nothing you will forever regret. Steady. She said nothing. (p. 191)

He had decided to spend the night alone. But his need for his wife gnawed at him. He did not believe he would be able to get through the night without her. Once they were back in London, once he had her settled in a new life, he would have to do without her for the rest of a lifetime. But tonight was different. After tonight, once he was away from Enfield, he would be able to cope alone again. He could feel his resolution slip. Perhaps he would have held to it, he thought, if the need have been a sexual one. But it was. (p. 203)

He drew her into his arms and against his body, wrapped the bedclothes snugly about her, and kissed the side of her face. "Sleep," he said. "I will have you warm in a moment. Just sleep. I forbid you to so much as think of sheep or their legs." "Sheep," she murmured sleepily. "Who are they?" She was asleep almost instantly - and so was he. (p. 204)

She felt a total fraud. She was a fraud. And all the servants called her your grace and treated her with marked respect, and all the neighbors who called on them with condolences addressed her by her title and looked upon her with almost awed respect. She was a fraud. She was a fortune hunter. (p. 221)

"Yes, I am indeed a married man," the duke said. "I married your sister the day after interviewing her in Upper Grosvenor Street. We do not yet have four children or even one, but I have hopes. Much depends upon whether I can run her to earth." (p. 233)

"I need you so much that I cannot quite contemplate the rest of my life if it must be lived without you. I need you so much that - Well, the words speak for themselves. I need you." "To look after Augusta?" [...] To look after Enfield? To provide you with an heir?" "And to be my friend and my confidant and my comfort. And to be my lover." (p. 241)

"You did not tell me you were a thief. I had to come after you to recover my stolen property." "But the pearls-" She would have died of shame if she could. She had thought the pearls were a gift. "Are yours, my love," he said. "They were a wedding gift. What you stole, Charity, was my heart. I have come to get it back if all else fails. But I would rather you kept it and brought it back to Enfield with you." (p. 242)

"The shock is going to wear off any minute now and they are going to be bursting in here to ask a million questions each - of each of us. Be warned. It is no light task you have just talked yourself into undertaking." "Dear me," the Duke of Withingsby said with a haughty lift of his brows. "We had better proceed with that kiss, then, your grace. Clearly I need something with which to bolster my fortitude." "Exactly what I was trying to say," she said while she could. She was certainly prevented from saying anything else for a good long while. (p. 244)

[read-in-order-to-live]

Title: The Star Thief

Autor: Jamie Grey

Notation: 5 stars

Synopsis:

She might only be twenty-three, but Renna Carrizal is the most notorious thief in the galaxy. There’s just one problem – all she wants is to get the frak out of the business. But when Renna rescues an injured boy from the warehouse she’s casing, she finds herself on the run from the mob instead of enjoying retirement on a garden world. Turns out, the kid was a plant to lead her to MYTH, a top-secret galactic protection agency...

Commentary:

Recommended for 17+ due to mature themes and sexual content.

I discovered this book thanks to an advice from GoodReads and as soon as I read the synopsis, I wanted to read it. Before that I took a look at the reviews and couldn't wait anymore so I bought the Kindle version and started reading it as soon as I received it.

This book is really wonderful, I couldn't let it aside before ending it... for a few nights, even my sleep couldn't win against this story.

The plot is really good, the rythm increasing at each chapter and the suspense well protected with a great switch at the end. I suspected things were not as simple at it seemed at the beginning but I didn't have all the solution and for once, that was a real pleasure to be surprised!

The worlds are well described even if I would have love to know a little more about the genesis of this coalition of planets; maybe we will have a glimpse of it on the others books. In the same idea, I can't wait to know how Renna succeeded to steal the Saphire!

I really appreciated the different races of the characters and the description made of them; it was as if I could see them and it was really great to imagine how handsome Viktis is; it's help to understand why Renna seems to have difficulties to control her sensations towards him or even more how she can't resist to the incredibly attractive Finn.

Now, I'm afraid there will be a lot of spoilers so if you don't have read the book for now, please, don't read anymore.

What I really enjoyed the most is the relationship between Renna and the others characters.

Renna-Myka: this is the most touching relation of the book I think; I loved how Renna who always had been alone - except for the little time she had with Blur, Finn and the Gang when she was sixteen - has to deal with this little boy so afraid and hurt. Without knowing it, she comes to love him, to care for him, to worry about him; she feels again and this feeling is the most pure ever because it's a maternal one, the kind of which helps you to bear anything and everything only to be sure the kid you love is safe and sound. The boy ties himself to her practically instantly and trusts her wholeheartly, helping her to believe she worths more than what she thought.

Myka looked up at her with big,dark eyes, and Renna's heart twisted. For some reason, this kid trusted her. Nobody ever trusted a thief. She couldn't betray him after everything that happened. (page 38)

"You came," the boy whispered, staring up at her like she was some kind of hero. "I told him you would. You promised." (page 328)

The author gives a real touch of tenderness in this relationship. How I appreciated Renna's reaction when she discovers about Myka's real nature; she loves him for him and doesn't care for what he appears but for what he IS.

Renna was not going to fail him. Not now, when he'd already been through so much. She blinked. What had all this maternal concern come from? (page 135)

Renna-Keva: A difficult relationship at the beginning between two women on two complete opposite sides but loving the same man and pushed to work together to save the world. With time, they learn to respect each other if not like and I really hope her relationship will become some sort of "friendship" even if it is an awkward one.

Renna-Gheewala: Renna understands Gheewala and the reserve she shows with everybody because of her special skills. She is one of the few Tech empath who succeeds to survive to the terrible consequences of her ability. Their relationship is made from respect and understanding, each other trying to help and encourage the other. I find it really sweet.

Gheewala watched her with wide eyes as Renna approached her station. " You have an electronic signature," the woman said. "Lucky me." Renna grimaced. "At least you'll always know how to find me if I'm close." "I'm so sorry." Gheewala stared down at her computer. "I wish there was something I could say." "Hey, don't worry about it. It's thanks to you we made it this far. Make sure the rest of the crew know it." She squeezed the woman's shoulder and moved on. (page 369)

Renna-Viktis: This relationship is really the most difficult to explain; they are friends, friends-with-benefits, partners, foes... I think they are really tied one to another but not really in sentimental way but only because Renna never let her protective shield down - in part because of her fear to be left alone again, in part because Viktis tried to kill her when the reward was interresting  but mostly because she never get ride of her so strong attachment to Hunter/Finn.

"So am I to assume he's the new fling of the week?" "Viktis..." "Don't worry. I promise I won't try to kill you this time. I'm more than over you." Renna shook her head. "You never loved me, Viktis." He smiled sadly, his violet eyes almost going soft. "You never let me." (page 319)

I love the fact that there is not a real love triangle in this story. Viktis and Renna are really close but I couldn't imagine Renna let down Finn for Viktis and I really hope it will not because it would be too like others stories when you finish by being really annoying by the heroine not knowing who to choose. I really enjoy this fake love triangle because I love how Viktis likes to tease Finn, enjoying how jealous the other man can be and how Renna tries to make them act as adult around her.

To Viktis, he turned and said, "You're like a bad disease  that just keeps showing up." Viktis grinned. "And you'd know  all about bad diseases, Captain?  I hope you were tested before you slept with our girl here." Dear gods, would the man ever grow up? (page 304)

I really hope we will have more of Renna-Viktis interaction in the others books because there is so much possibility to work on with them but I can help but beg there will be no real loving relation between them except for the real friendship with sentiments (sorry, in French we call it "amitié amoureuse" but I can't find the real words in English... you know the kind of deep feelings and attraction you can feel for a friend while knowing you could never love him enough to be your husband or your wife.) they already have - without the "benefits" side. I love how they tease each other but in the main time how they soothe each other sometimes and how they support and protect the other.

"Viktis and I have an understanding. When he's not trying to kill me or sleep with me, he's a decent guy. I think he can help us with this." (page 286)

"Where should I put my stuff? Am I bunking with you, Renna, love?" "Hell no. Keva vill find you a place to stay." (page 308)

Finn-Viktis: The two together are really great even if they can't bear each other. In fact, I think Finn can't support Viktis because he believes Renna slept with him to free the crew and his jealousy blinds him even if he has to admit Viktis is here to help them when needed. In the other side, Viktis seems to like Finn for his courage and the love Renna shows him even if he likes nothing more than teasing him and infurating him. I look forward to see them work together in the next book, hoping they will not destroy each other but really act like a team to protect Myka and find a way to save Renna.

Finn shook his head and strode past toward the CIC. "He can stay. But one Ileth toe out of line and he goes in the brig." "Damn, Renna. This guy is a gem." Viktis frowned at her as they followed Finn through the ship. "I can see why you choose him over me." "Renna slanted him a look. "Enough. We barely made it out of there in one piece. We don't have time to ice your injured pride right now." (pages 304-305)

Plus, Viktis depicted everything Finn ran from and what he never wants to become again so being around the merc is something the space marine can't bear easily.

"I promised myself I'd never go back to that life, Renna. And here I am about to turn traitor." (page 379)

Renna-Finn: Their relation is obviously the only real sentimental one and I quite like it! I love how the author makes them know each other for several years and how Renna never gets ride of Hunter for so many years. I enjoyed so much how Finn's react when he meets her again, all his anger for what he thought she did taking the best of him, infuriating him to no point. Proof that he already deeply loved her when she was sixteen even if he never dared to tell it, Blur lying to him by assuring Renna and him were together.

"You are my problem. Have been from day one. I don't want you on my ship, on my team, or in my life." (page 183)

The way the author describes Renna's feelings for Finn is enjoyable, in a very sensual poetic way. And how strong her attachment to him grows is beautiful melting my heart and giving me desire to feel such amazing sensations.

But there' been something about his kind eyes and the lopsided smile he'd used with her that had already had her falling in love with him. (page 65)

She met his expressionless gaze, ignoring the twist of lust in her gut. It was just residual, left over from a childish crush. (page 66)

She hated that she recognized his scent. Hated even more that it made something warm and safe curl through her. (page 184)

Their relation is made of passion, of courage, of respect and of humor and I really like this aspect because it lights a little the tension they always feel when they are together.

He rubbed a hand over his face before looking at her, and she noticed how tired his blue eyes looked. "Can you? Forgive me, I mean?" She shrugged. "I haven't shot you yet. That's always a good sign." (page 196)

"Don't go falling for any sexy mercenaries while I'm gone, or I'll have to track you down." "Well, if that's all it'll take..." He smiled sadly. (page 379)

The author created a lovely and sweet moment after they escaped the complexe. Finn is injuried and Renna explains how she had her terrible scar on her neck while waiting for the Athena to save them. He is the only one she trusts enough to talk about her past and all the while, he holds her hand, squeezing it sometimes to give her courage and remind her he's with her. My eyes burned with tears while I read this moment because you can feel their love and connection. When they are together, they feel like home and can finally trust someone and be really them and that's notion to be really seen by the other is quite important in this book where everybody always wear a mask. They crave to be know for who they really are but most of the time their fear to be betrayed is their deeper and strongest emotion... except when Renna and Finn are together.

His gaze never wavered, and she felt itchy and uncomfortable, like he was truly seeing her.

But if this was the end of the Renna as she had been, she wanted someone to have seen her. (page 365)

In each other's arm, they can be them, the ex merc became a space marine and the lonely star thief who finds again her heart and becomes a loving woman strong enough to recognize her love for Myka, her deep friendship for Viktis and how she can't live without Finn.

I think I will end this review here or you will never see the end of it. All I can add is:

 "Thank you so much Jamie Grey for the great story you gave us! Thanks for all those marvelous hours I could share with your characters, in the amazing world you created. I look forward to read the second book in summer 2014! Believe me, I will buy it as soon it will be released, I promise!"

Quotes:

Finn followed close behind. His presence felt warm, like sunshine on her back. When she was younger, she'd gotten really good at knowing when he was close. That skill had come back faster than she'd expected. Old habits died hard. (page 207)

She knew better than to get involved or let her feelings get in the way, but this mission - with Myka, the facility, the mechs and the clay - was based on nothing but feelings. Running was her only option. Promises be damned. (page 246)

Running made her a coward, but staying... staying made her stupid. (page 249)

Finn was going to be fine. But as the fear drained away, the tsunami of relief was even more unsettling. She cared what happened to him. Too much. (page 265)

Renna rose to her feet. She couldn't afford to get involved with a man like Finn. He stood for everything she'd fought against: law, order, blindly following the rules. But instead of leaving the hospital, her feet took her into Finn's room. (page 266)

"I've missed you," Finn whispered against her hair. Something warm and sweet twisted its way through her heart. "I missed you, too. I'm so glad you're not dead." (page 291)

She forced a stern look to her face. "For now. But I can't wait for shore leave. You still owe me some more convincing."

He traced a finger across her jaw. "I promise." (page 315)

She let out a sigh and let the image fade. She needed to focus, to get this job done no matter what. The kid was counting on her. The universe was counting on her. No pressure. (page 318)

"But if you're with me, I'll be fine." He slipped his hand into Renna's, and her heart twisted. (page 368)

Myka shrugged. "I'm not worried. When I'm bigger, I'll protect all of you."

"I bet you will. Now get some rest. We should be at your uncle's lab soon." (page 369)

He pulled her into a hug, and she inhaled his familiar scent of cedar and starfuel. "I figure I owe you one after trying to kill you. I'll keep your men safe."

She grinned at him. "I'm going to hold you to that. You know you're included, right?"

"I was hoping. Maybe I have a chance after all." He winked and squeezed her hand. (page 379)

She smiled up at him. "And don't kill the pirate. We need him." (page 379)

View all my reviews

[read-in-order-to-live]

Title: Le Petit Prince - The Little Prince

Autor: Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Synopsis:

The story is counted by the narrator, an aviator whose plane crashes in the Sahara desert, far from civilization. He is greeting by an incredible strange boy with golden hair, a scarf and a lovable laugh. During eight days, while the narrator is trying to fix his plane and after he drew a sheep for the "little prince", he starts to be attached to the little boy who counted him his amazing life.

Commentary:

I read this book when I was a teenager but knew it by heart because I had an audio tape read by Gérard Philippe.

This is one of my best childhood memories because this story makes us travel so far, following The Little Prince in his peregrinations. His unconditional love for his rose and his deep friendship with the aviator, the narrator, are really moving. I think the best part for me is the way he learns how to win over the fox. It's the most romantic part and certainly the one I never forgot and never will because it's so true and so pure. Saint-Exupéry's genius is proved by the way he wrote this little novel. At first, this book seems only a tale for children because of the age of the Little Prince, the simple words the writor uses and all the incredible adventures tell. But if you read it at different ages, you will find different level of interpretation and the "tale for children" can become a real philosophical study. Saint-Exupéry wrote it during the Second World War, and it was a symbolic conception of the life. That's why "The Little Prince" is studied at the university.

Quotes:

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye. You become responsible forever, for what you have tamed. You risk tears if you let yourself be tamed. It is such a secret place, the land of tears. To me, you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world...

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[read-in-order-to-live]

Title: The Chronicles of Pern: First Fall

Autor: Anne McCaffrey

Synopsis:

First book in the chonological order of the wonderful saga of the Dragonriders of Pern, written by Anne McCaffrey.

First Fall is a collection of 5 short novels:

Survey P.E.R.N

The Dolphin's Bell

The Fort of Red Hanrahan

The Second Weyr

Rescue Run

Commentary:

This book is really a pleasure to read. The stories are short but not rushed, deep enough to be really entertaining. The characters are fascinating, giving us the desire to know more about them.

Survey P.E.R.N - the really beginning of the saga - allows us to discover how Pern was discover, why she received her name and why it was a blessing for her futur residents to have been qualified as P.E.R.N. The Dolphin's Bell set during the First Pass, at the same time as "Dragonsdawn", explains how the dolphins interact with the humans on Pern after they went to the Northern continent. The Fort of Red Hanrahan tells us how Red Hanrahan, father of Sorka Hanrahan first queen rider of Pern, builts a new fort named afterwards Ruatha where he breeds quality horses and wants to re-established horse racing. The Second Weyr - my favorite - explains how Benden Weyr was created. It tells us too the beginning of Torene - Alaranth's rider - and Mihall's ( M'hall) - Brianth's rider and eldest son of Sean and Sorka - story, characters we meet again in "Dragonsblood". Rescue Run is the last novel of "First Fall" collection. It narrates us how the rescue team came after receiving the warning sent by Ted Tubberman when Threads fell for the first time.

This collection is important because it helps us to know better of the first human's steps on this so beautiful but mysterious planet. If you didn't already read it, don't hesitate to do it, you will not be disappointed.

Main Characters or Characters the saga will refer to:

Sean Connell: first dragonrider of Pern, he impressed bronze Carenath. Husband of Sorka Hanrahan, he created the first Weyr, Fort.

Appareance: "First Fall", "Dragonsdawn"

Sorka Hanrahan-Connell: she impressed Faranth, the first golden queen. Wife of Sean Connell, she is also Red Hanrahan's daughter - the one who created Ruatha Hold and re-established horse racing thanks to the horses he breeds.

Appareance: "First Fall", "Dragonsdawn", "Dragonsblood"

M'hall (Mihall): first Weyrleader of Benden Weyr, impressed bronze Brianth. Son of Sean and Sorka, long life mate of Torene.

Appareance: "First Fall", "Dragonsblood"

Torene ('Rene) Ostrovsky: first Weyrwoman of Benden Weyr, impressed golden queen Alaranth, can hear all the dragons. Long life mate of M'hall.

Appareance: "First Fall", "Dragonsblood"

Quotes:

"The Second Weyr", P. 175 (Ballantines Book Edition)Torene is caught dreaming about how she loves butter by Alaranth:

You like me better than butter? Of course, I do, but there's absolutely no doubt that you couldn't be spread on hot bread!

"The Second Weyr", P. 190 (Ballantines Book Edition)Mihall and Torene discussing about the future Alaranth's first rising fly:

"The question is, how does Alaranth feel about Brianth?" "Isn't it more how I feel about you?" The words tumbled out before she could stop them, and she shook her head and stamped her foot in annoyance: That wasn't at all what she had intented to say. Mihall rose slowly until he was looking down at her, an intense expression on his face. "Now, it's ultimately the dragons who decide: the one who decides how to fly this queen, and the one who decides who she'll let catch her."

"The Second Weyr", P. 209 (Ballantines Book Edition):

We both have what we wanted, said a dragon in a sleepy satisfied tone. Try though she would in all the years she and M'hall were the Weyrleaders of Benden, Torene was never sure which dragon had spoken. Or to whom.

Others book's coverts:

  Illustrations:

"First Fall" by Keith Parkinson

  "First Fall" by Wojtek Siudmak

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