you're the one who's spent five years wanting to go back. i thought there was enough good work to do here. the other side stopped being home when everyone i loved died. i knew i was going to die here... kara, why did we have to come back?
a low-commitment multimuse roleplay blog by sans.
private & friends-only. sporadic activity. vibes-based, fun-priority, replies slower than the horsepower of 2000 snails. please read my guidelines to know what you're getting into, and please do not follow if you do not know me already - this is my space to be a monkey. i will drop threads and i will forget to answer anything and everything. i am chill about most things, we're all tired adults with real lives and health conditions here, and roleplay is literally just a hobby. i am a bad roleplayer, please keep this in mind the whole time and let's try to have fun here. i love you, thank you for being here, may your week be as lovely as you. your well-being and life always comes first, please don't worry about anything with me so long we're on the same page of things. monkey :)
current theme. helena wayne of detective comics. #e7154e. #2fd9c3.
hello, this is gonna be a pretty big rant about my oc, heather neveah holland! she goes by neveah holland, to be honest, i also think heather is a pretty name for her too and she got to choose her own name anyway, so her rules :)
content warning: politics (fictitious content), transphobia, etc.
to start with, neveah is one of the npcs i've created for my dazzler, she is a permanent & founding member of alison's management team "team +dazzler"; i'd surmise neveah's role as someone who handles the numbers, the statistics, the graphs, the data, the logistics, and often times, her work confluences into the social media management and pr / optics management side of dazzler's personal brand, though alison already has a social media manager and pr manager. officially, neveah prefers to be recognised as dazzler's PA (personal assistant), she doesn't like having much attention drawn to herself -- something something, look like the flower and be the serpent underneath.
of course neveah understands the power of social engineering, optics, and public opinion manipulation; she comes from a political and affluent background, being not just the youngest child of fictious universe of marvel and not real life new york's mayor turned president, but also his prized campaigner that helped him win mayorship i'd sayyyyyy 5-6 years ago. neveah was always a precocious child, thinking and talking faster than her chaotic, dysfunctional surroundings in her god-awful family. she found stability in the world of maths, data, statistics, and she ended up pursuing an education in fields pertaining politics, economics, finance, and legal studies; utilising her family's wealth and resources, neveah worked supremely hard to finish highschool fast and fairly get into an ivy league university the hard-earned way. she recognises she has resources many people won't, and she wanted to make the most of that instead of sitting on these privileges.
neveah is transfemale; her politics lean very democrat and liberal, while her family were centrist at best and in recent times took a hard right lean. neveah is also a mutant; while i have not settled down on the specifics, i'd say neveah doesn't really have any powers, her mutantism primarily shows up in the form of something subtle yet physical visual cues, like aquamarine scales or pointed ears.
neveah hates all of her family. her father is a sexist old-timey tradbossman stereotype, her mother is an entitled enabler, and her siblings are the worst; her siblings are the likes of podcasters and lifestyle coaches and wellness gurus who really are just snakes oilmen that specifically prey on vulnerable people. neveah hates that. she understands how her siblings are successful and found a great financial loop, and neveah hates, hates, hates it. she likes manipulating numbers, not people. not real people with struggles, interiority, and emotions. that is not the work she wants to do just 'cause she's got a sharp memory and a strong analytical mind and can do complex calculations and make statistical predictions in her head.
neveah was in the closet up until she was 19-21; though she did not agree with her family, she wanted to play the long game and get the hell out of there. thus, the education, the preparation, the drive, the ambition. in hindsight, neveah regrets being the primary campaigner for her father and helping him win the mayorship of new york, but at the time, neveah was truly thinking he'd stop there and not get worse, and she truly thought that the pros would outweigh the cons and that at least her father would have her back.
he didn't.
shortly after her father became mayor, neveah was unfortunately outed as both a mutant and transfem long before she's even ready to come out. the optics of this get REALLY bad. democrats go from disdaining her to pitying her, republicans turn on her hard. her family drops her without a word. she's exposed, she's stripped of all defences and safety nets, she has to transition faster than she would've liked, she has to find a quick source of financial stability since she's going to be cut out of the family will and kicked out of her home soon, and she has to make sure she doesn't get hurt or worse, knowing damn well she's made a hell ton of enemies in the country during a terrible unstable time.
this is when dazzler shows up; it's by coincidence that this is around the time alison first started to seek out mutants in various industries and parts of the country after she rebelled and quit her very anti-mutant and exploitative record label, which is one of the huge and prestigious ones in the country. alison doesn't know the full extent of neveah's story, but she meets her as she is -- a promising young woman, by all accounts -- and asks if neveah would like to join dazzler's crusade, alison already convinced (my other oc,) civilian rights activist & lawyer turned hr manager who also got ousted by her job due to being exposed as a mutant tracy gatsby to be her manager.
though this is not what neveah ever had in mind, she was readily open to the idea for a number of reasons. neveah is young, fits dazzler's demographic perfectly; but most importantly, neveah likes to work with big numbers and general public optics, and dazzler is perfect for that, way better than any politician neveah could've once worked for. why? because alison is nice. alison doesn't want to exploit people for her success. neveah feels good about working for dazzler because she gets to experience her own interests and strengths without having to sacrifice her personal ethics.
currently, neveah maintains a safer life as a private citizen; though her father is literally the president (former or otherwise), working with dazzler as well as due to alison's love and protection of her people as well as the success of dazzler(tm), neveah has been able to bounce back from the controversies before. she's changed her name, grew out her hair, has been on estrogen, and she basically faked her death as the kid of that fucked up rich family. she doesn't forget where she comes from, of course, and neveah does wish that her life didn't get derailed from her lifelong plan of moving out quietly and growing into herself at her own pace in europe or something. and yet, neveah is glad she had said yes to dazzler, because even with all of the hatred and dysfunctionality in the world, neveah gets to be herself and grow into the promising strong woman that alison had seen when most people didn't.
neveah is very genz and up-to-date, she's very responsible for how dazzler's brand is actually following trends and adapting to the new time without ever giving off "how you doing fellow kids" type. neveah is real, but kind and sweet, and she and alison work so well because they both want dazzler's fans to have the best experiences at her shows and on their social media feeds. this is why they succeed ethically, because who knew you'd have more supportive fanbases and make money sustainably if you consistently look out for accommodations and accessibility, never alienate any age group or population, consider the needs of all your fans in mind, not participate in fast consumerism, and actually invest in quality in a way that generates profits? yeah. i love neveah and i think she's a very fun character in my head especially in adjacent to dazzler; alison sees her as a younger sister for sure, and neveah feels that kindred found family connection with dazzler. especially because neveah doesn't have to perform or hide parts of herself to be respected by alison.
my current fc for neveah is kate godwin of dc comics, who's also transfem nod nod... live action, i'm still looking, neveah gives me the vibes of kathryn newton honestly, i just would like to find a blondie who's also transfem to keep things harmonised <3
hello oomfs! i'm in a mood to rant but my mind is all over the place so would someone be a dear and pick just one oc of mine or a book idea ( 1 / 2 ) of mine on here? :) i'll go with the first comment!!
thank you for showing your interest, @brinasversion, @superbloomin, @djdivius, @revivaiist, @invulnerablextouch, and many others who've shown interest in these characters! 🩵🩵🩵
okay to interact/like/reblog with this post, all mutuals & non-mutuals // face-claims in consideration:
salem rob raco, matthew broome, hudson williams, woo do-hwan; comics.
weasel jack antonoff; comics.
arena angel mattea murdock (marvel comics), alexis kaye (dc comics), mia goth, samara weaving, rina sawayama, revy (black lagoon), michiko (michiko and hatchin), adria arjona, sonoya mizuno, sza, rila fukushima, arden cho, ursula corberó, kiko mizuhara, yoruichi shihōin (bleach), sevika (arcane), juri han (street fighter), bayonetta, velvet (tales of berseria), power (chainsaw man) && inspiration: infinity pool (2023), the neon demon (2016), tragedy girls (2017), spree (2020), assassination nation (2018), cyberpunk 2077, bladerunner 2049, tag (2015, sion sono), bodies bodies bodies (2022), missing (2023), the menu (2022), money plane (2020), i saw the tv glow (2024), possessor (2020), when evil lurks (2023), late night with the devil (2024), the beast (la bête) (2024), the substance (2024), cam (2018), funhouse (2018), companion (2025), the assessment (2025).
sera still looking for face-claims for her; otherwise comics art is preferred as always. :)
hellooooo i am considering fleshing out my portrayal of salem saberhagen >:) as a sarcastic talking cat + a shape-shifter warlock... while we're at the topic of archie comics, i think i'd like to try writing betty cooper for fun...
you know what i think theresa COULD be your scary guard dog privileges once you are close to her and she likes you like. she has sonic powers (can be loud AND she can manipulate people with her voice) and morally grey and cares so much about her people. of course you could be a sweetie and be like "PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE EXPLODE JOKER WITH YOUR VOICE GIVE HIM A MIGRAINE THAT KILLS HIS NERVE CELLS HYPNOTISE HIS INNER VOICE AND MAKE HIM THINK EVERYBODY HATES HIM" and she sighs deeply before going. "........ cover ye'r ears."
not trying to project but i feel like northstar would be self aware and be aware -- from years of being an activist, leading teams, working with people, and learning from his past & realising that his traumas don't give him a pass but they don't shame or define him either -- he's benefited from the patriarchy as a white dude and it just is a way of life. it's unfair. at the same time, he's going to be able to get away with being a bitchy diva and still be respected as a leader and hero, while his peers would be termed a bitch for not smiling. he's aware that even with his struggles, he's systematically benefited and instead of having a saviour's guilt or whatever, he uses said advantages to help his female co-workers, he's willing to be the bad guy to let them be in peace, he will be a safe space and he will respect their choices, etc. he will not go soft on them, he will be a bastard to them too because he just is a very stuck up french man. at the same time, he genuinely loves his sister and his co-workers and genuinely looks up to several heroines as he would with men. and it's equity, not equality, because he knows people of all genders are equal, but they're not treated equally at societal and systematic scales. he's not going to mansplain feminism to you, he's simply going to be your ally and be aware of his own social footing without making a show of it. he knows he doesn't get a pass to be a sexist just because he's not attracted to women; how he feels about woman is not relevant to how he treats them, and treating women is not different from treating men because only society will make you think that women are different species with no interiority like men. he's a diva, not performative. he also just dont care
the sun sheds its brightest rays gently upon the curves and contours that make up the boneyard for what it stands to become and dares to remain as today. nothing escapes the unbridled mercy of the sun or the reach of its light; fast, infinite, unsparing. it is not kind so much as it is thorough. it’s as if the sun takes everything in its path and claims it whole by painting them in heavy strokes of the golden light of hope, revival, and forgiveness, really laying it on thick.
in the sun, her hair is lighter, more rind than flesh, closer to the peel of a blood orange than the dark, bruised red interior of it. newer, deeper patches of freckles form constellations across her face and her skin. the green of her eyes catches the light in wave after wave until it’s thrown straight back at her, reflected and doubled, when she’s cradling the bottle in a gloved hand. she looks like someone who belongs in the magnificent warmth of the sun.
theresa hates it.
she hates all of it. the green light of forgiveness feels like hot iron on fragile wounds exposing the nerves when she’s in the darkness for so long — that, and the daydrinking doesn’t help much, either.
“for the umpteenth time —” she ripostes instead of responding, her mercurial temper making itself known before her eyes do, still having yet to meet lorna’s. “— i’m not going t’jump!”
siryn doesn’t mean to do it, that’s the worst part; a couple of unruly sound waves rattles loose through the fractures in her composure cracked by her anger, and the bottle vanishes over the cliffside. the echo follows a second later. it’s followed by the wingbeat of startled crows, scattering in a ragged burst of black shapes visibly distressed by the disturbance, the domino-effect of her folly.
the irony lands fast, too. humbling.
“not again,” a quiet sigh with the quietening of her voice, gaze tilting to reconnect with the sight ahead of her granted by the height of the cliffside. “anyway.”
a small mistake, and yet it feels worse. inevitable, and yet a choice. freedom from the crutch of the alcohol and from the clutch of morrigan’s manipulation has only left theresa alone to grapple with the sheer emptiness in her ribcage that only makes her feel more like a cadaver split open on the autopsy’s table, scrutinised and observed and catalogued and investigated for the cause — rather than a mutant who was saved by the collaborative efforts of her -
friends. theresa knows she hasn’t been a good one in ages.
knows she’s been smoke and falling beams and locked doors, knows she’s the house and the fire and the poor bastard sitting idly by the door. siryn takes the blame the way other people take shelter, gathers it all in and lets it collapse all on her, because that part feels familiar. controlled. inevitable. chosen. self-imposed. lorna deserves better than ash and apologies, better than someone who keeps burning the room as a safety measure. the least terry can do right now is not waste her time — what amount of time lorna’s going to be at the boneyard for, before new york pulls her away. inevitably. and it still feels sorely preventable.
“don’t let me hold ye up, lor,” theresa says, softer now, easy as breath, that old warmth slipping back into her voice, she almost sounds like herself again, like she’s talking about vermont and ice-cream in space again, about roads and old maps and all the places they might go, might’ve gone. no temper this time. the fifth stage of it, maybe, that bastard, grief; she’s accepted she can’t be what lorna deserves; a good friend, honest company, a peace of mind. “ye’ve better places to be.”
lorna’s the best person terry’s ever known, in this lifetime and the next, and so on. theresa won’t be the ashes clinging to polaris’ light, that’s a vow she makes to no one important.
something about northstar that's so fascinating to me is how he's not afraid to have traits that media/society tend to paint as "feminine" -- he's very family oriented, he puts his husband first, he's very protective of kids, and he provides emotional support when it's needed. but at the same time, he is comfortable in his skin, gender identity, and sexuality, he's very much a leader, he doesn't sugarcoat things or perform bullshit for the sake of performing bullshit, and he's not threatened by other authority figures because he doesn't care about authority figures/tyrants. he is all of what he is, he can't be put in a box, he embodies And defies stereotypes and expectations that his labels follow, because at the end of the day, he doesn't give a fuck beyond what he wants to do and achieve. and it does make sense, considering his role as an activist and revolutionary; caring about social faux pas or image etc etc doesn't do much for his protests against injustices and for what's right 🤷♀️ and the last time he checked, it's not illegal for him to serving cunt occasionally and glamming out when he feels like it and still show up for an x-factor debriefing
one thing i love about northstar is that he's not afraid to care. he's a sarcastic french diva who won't hesitate to insult you, but he's not emotionally uncomfortable. he cares about his family and his friends so much and he's not ashamed of that. he is a responsible leader and he also sees his team as people he cares about and want to be in a better place. the type to call you an idiot and say that when he and the x-factor help you, they're not erasing a mistake or fixing a problem or easing a burden -- they're fucking taking care of a friend when they help you. when they save your life. when they rescue you. when they resurrect you. all of this is an act of life even if you feel like the problem for being the villain or the victim. it's rotten work and he will do the rotten work for you because he cares about your well-being and he can admit he's selfish enough to want you to get better because he can't stand to see you hurt. he's selfish enough to desperately want to be close with his long lost twin sister, his dead daughter, and his husband kyle, and do the selfish things to keep them in his life and keep them happy. he will die before he ever sees his teams as disposable, pawns, or soldiers; he refuses to let younger or vulnerable mutants harm themselves for a mission but also not patronise them and still take them seriously, he can be such a protective dad or big brother figure at times, and he's just such a fierce. and loyal friend who is blunt and cuts to the bullshit because he cares about you, and he won't play the game of making you understand that before you let him help him because that's good enough reason for him. he is so complex and flawed but also just UGH. big fucking emotions about him and the moments when he helps people or cares about them while also being a cynic realist jerk
my northstar accidentally speedrunning (heh) my dazzler's lesbian journey when she addresses his dear friend alison blaire as also homosexual like him in an interview or something not to out her or anything but because jean-paul can SWEAR dazzler has always been a lesbian and has come out as one in 2016. alison's like "i literally told you about my boyfriend Lobster Man last week" and jp is like i thought you were messing with me ali. as an atheist gay man the men you've told me about don't even seem like the type of beings even god would make. respectfully
and northstar making a correction for the press but being his usual sarcastic diva self like "ah yes i misspoke in my last interview when i mentioned dazzler is homosexual. the word i intended to use was homophobic." and alison is calling him again stat like no hello no nothing just I AM A QUEER ALLY JP THAT NEW STATEMENT IS THE OPPOSITE OF HELPFUL
