( hi i promise iâm not dead but my thesis did try its best to murder me!!!!!!
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@theartofmadeline
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@cxmeback
( hi i promise iâm not dead but my thesis did try its best to murder me!!!!!!
I knew his grandfather. And his mother. She was an incredible woman. [x]
I started this when the very first trailer for TROS came out. This was rough draft and a gif test, so itâs not perfect. I was going to animate a lot more of it. But for now, Iâm just going to post this, in case I can never get myself to go back to it. Thereâs a lot more ideas occupying my head right now.
A Marriage Story
At the age of 19 Padme Amidala was the queen of a planet and had already saved her people from total crisis
At the age of 19 Anakin Skywalker was married and a general in a galaxy wide war and was considered to be one of the most powerful Jedi in historyÂ
At the age of 19 Leia Organa was a senator in the imperial senate as well as a leader and spy for the Rebellion
At the age of 19 Luke was making vroom vroom noises with his toy planesÂ
I love him so much
Reblog if you empathize with Luke
At Lukeâs age of 19, Uncle Owen established the longest record of holding back the tidal forces of Skywalker bullshit, besting the previous record of 22 minutes set by Obi Wan Kenobi
accurate.
Literally, Uncle Owen dies and Luke IMMEDIATELY gets into a bar fight (Obi-Wan beat his personal best, having lasted 25.3 minutes holding back Skywalkers this time), breaks into an Imperial facility & breaks out a prisoner, joins a gang, and destroys a space station, in, like, 3 days.
darkxreyâ:
debris and destruction is what surrounds them, where a civilization used to lie and now thereâs nothing but the smell of death, blood and putrefaction. the first order really wipe another population to its brim. her nostril blares as she breathes in hard. shrinking her nose as the smell invades her sense.
  â- she focuses on her sisterâs voice, questions that run through her mind long before she asks.
â youâre not a burden Rey ! youâve proven yourself to them many times,â she grows frustrated with the situation, slide her blaster back onto her shoulder and reaches out to grab onto Reyâs arm. making eye contact.â safe? Rey weâre together⊠iâm keeping you safe. weâve got each otherâs back, what else could we find if we leave? thereâs nothing out there⊠no one wants us!â
âBut this isnât what I want!â Rey shouts. The carnage, the wasteland...she cannot believe that they are truly responsible for this. The First Order positions itself as a peacemaking force, but with this kind of devastation left behind, Rey knows now that itâs all a lie. They should have known from the beginning.
Feeling Kira seize her arm, the scavenger shuts her eyes and turns her head away. That feeling is back, the one that buzzes in the back of her skull and reminds her that this isnât right. It reminds her that sheâs different, and something unknown is calling her...away from this place. Away from the darkness.
âI canât do this, Kira.â she says, âAnd you shouldnât have to either. Look at all the pain theyâve caused...this isnât what we should want. Please, letâs go some place else...some place safe and quiet, like it used to be...â
đŻ
send đŻ for a food headcanon
Rey is a total food hoarder. It becomes a bit of a problem when she joins in completely with the Resistance, given that their little band of outcasts is meant to share all that they have. But if anyone where to go into Reyâs things, where she keeps her tools and whatnot, theyâd find lots of old Imperial rations, pilfered from ships and old settlements. Theyâd find packaging from different sweets and the cores from all kinds of various fruits, but not one crumb of anything edible left behind. Rey hoards, but she never wastes. Sheâll eat anything in sight, never quite sure when sheâll go hungry again.
* talk about your muse!
send đŻ for a food headcanon
sendđ„for a drink headcanon
send đą for a mental health headcanon
send đŠ for a physical health headcanon
send âfor a sleep headcanon
send đ for a love headcanon
send đŁ for a stress headcanon
send đ” for a sickness headcanon
send đ€Č for a religious headcanon
send đĄ for a home headcanon
send đŹ for a family headcanon
send đŒ for a work headcanon
send âïž for a sadness headcanon
send đĄ for an anger headcanon
send đ© for a ridiculous headcanon
send đŒ for a happiness headcanon
darkxreyâ:
@cxmebackâ
pain radiates between her temples, ducks, digs, burrows like a vicious mite, into the grubby pink matter in her brain. ever since becoming a trooper, she became empty like a sieve, holes drilled into her spirit again && again.  there is no peace for a woman with a blank slate smeared across her soul; not even the chalk dust is allowed to linger.
undriven snow falls fresh around them. her white suit formal and suiting her best.Â
 blizzards, chill that grips her in its vice && coils around her like a blanket.
her eyes fall onto her sister. blaster pointing down.
â     iâm not leaving, Rey. the first order gave us a purpose, donât you see it? why would you want to walk away from that? if you desert. you know⊠you know iâll have to report,â
Sheâs shaking in the snow, hat discarded, hair whipping in the wind that threatens to freeze every inch of her if she stays out here too long. Even though Kira looks well-composed, a perfect officer and leader, Rey cannot seem to match her. Sheâs never been able to match her; the state of their uniforms is giveaway enough. Kiraâs is pressed, perfect, not a button out of place. Reyâs is crumpled and uncomfortable, a perfect metaphor for how she feels as part of the First Order.
âI canât stay here, Kira.â she says, her voice nearly pleading. The blaster in Kiraâs hands makes her nervous. She wouldnât...would she?
âI donât have a purpose here! Iâm...Iâm useless, Iâm a burden...theyâre going to get rid of me one way or another. If we leave now, we can start over! We can go back, we can be safe...â
When your sonâs a Jedi padawan but he still inherited his fatherâs sass
Finished! âDo or do notâ story.
( i have...feelings about the concept art thatâs steadily been leaked and i need some âduel of fatesâ plots up in here
thejacketthiefâ:
   Finnâs brows raise up a little when she asks if HE feels anything. He doesnât, of courseâ except uncomfortable. This dark, damp cave isnât exactly the ideal spot to find oneself.Â
   âNo⊠Iâve got nothing, sorry.â Heâd figured if anyone was going to sense something, it would be her. And if she doesnât, well⊠does that mean theyâre in the wrong cave?
   âWell, I guess all we can do is keep heading further in, then⊠See if anything pops out.â He presses his lips together, giving a resolute nod before he starts walking forward again, deeper into the cave.Â
   âDo you think itâll be in a creepy box?âÂ
â...right. Pops out.â Rey repeats. Sheâs less than a step behind Finn as they venture inside, into the darkness and stench. She pulls her lightsaber off her hip only once the outside light has receded entirely, using it to illuminate their path...and ward off anything that might pop out.
âDo you want it to be in a creepy box?â she teases lightly, âWhatever it is, it must be well hidden...Kylo Ren would have destroyed it otherwise.â
She can feel him here, too. An old presence. Heâs been to this planet before.
Looking back at Finn, she tries to estimate how far into the cave theyâve gone. Something is calling out now, but itâs dark enough that sheâs not sure which way.
â...youâre sure you canât feel anything?â she presses again, âI thought...maybe you had before...âÂ
darkxreyâ:
Reyâs weight settles besides her; thereâs a simple kind of trust && comfort starting to make its way in as though theyâve been here enough time that this is whatâs right. having her sister by her side. she canât think of a life without her.
â oh you so do,â she accuses, making sure Reyâs feet are as far away as hers as she can. deja vu is a discomfort she has come to know like the backs of her dull-scraped, low-sheened knuckles.  Â
â and what you think none of the things i say about you are true? come on. at least admit it. cocky.â laughter flirts the lilt of her voice muffled in the crook of her shoulder; she curls into Rey as if by instinct. they keep coming together like this, like the sea and the shore. twins. two of the same â just like when they were in the womb. she might act like sheâs so tough, like the world fits in the palm of her hand, as if sheâs always the leader. but truth is Kira craves moment like this, where she can drop the mask. be innocent, not have to play a part. where she can still be young and careless.
â you know    mum would be proud of you,â
âWell, if they are cold, itâs because you always hog the blankets.â Rey quips back, sinking further under the covers and trying not to steal the majority of her sisterâs pillow. This is more comfortable than being alone in her room, which is far too dark and silent. She misses the creaks of the AT-AT, the sound of the wind, the feel of the sand...but Kira is right, this is better. They are safer here.
That doesnât stop her mind from wandering, even still. If their parents ever did come back for them, what would they find? Abandoned ships, no record of where theyâd gone. Would they know to reach out to the First Order? Would anyone in their unit even tell their parents if they asked?
All thoughts for another time, she supposes.
â...proud of me?â she murmurs, âI didnât do anything...this was your idea. I just flew the ship. Sheâd be proud of you.â
darkxreyâ:
Kira smile slip her lips, sun-leather skin making way for the strained ripples flicking in its wake.  smile lines are a luxury like the food theyâve been given on the destroyer. she reaches out to wipe the tears away from her sisterâs eyes.â    i never doubted you,â she confesses under a breath. knowing her sister is the strongest person sheâs ever met.
despite this tattooed, forced allegiance to the first order.
BONDS lace around her wrist between both her & Rey of a different sort.  a past painted with the same brush, shared memories going back to the very roots of her marrow bones sticks her sister with a lionâs heart bellowing roars from her chest.  with Rey⊠itâs  SHARED  EXPERIENCE, shackles smashed with fetters still dangling from their ankles.  dragging toward freedom when the years behind them say anything but locks them together.
she reaches out a broad palm that holds all the reassurance in the world in its weight  &  lays it across Reyâs shoulder.  the edge of a smirk trickles into mirthful features.  crinkles smatter outside her eyes  &  drive into her cheeks.â you can always stay the night     just keep your cold feet to yourself.â she chuckles and jumps on her bed. tugging herself in under her blanket. they might look the part of grown up but⊠theyâre still kids. nineteen. and going strong.
Kira has always known how to make things better, ever since they were little. Though theyâd never know the truth-- or at least it surely looked that way-- Rey firmly believed that Kira had been born first. Sheâs a natural leader, Reyâs guide through practically everything. It was her idea to enlist in the First Order. It was her idea to leave Jakku.
And Rey trusts her judgement, believing firmly in every word her sister says. Theyâll be alright.Â
Finding a way to make the moment playful, Rey giggles softly to herself before glaring teasingly at her sister. She follows Kiraâs lead, tucking herself under the blankets and scrunching her nose.
âI donât have cold feet!â she scoffs. Metaphorically, yes. Physically? Sheâd continue to deny that. âYouâve made that up ever since we were little. My feet are a completely normal temperature, thank you.â
darkxreyâ:
â if they donât want you then weâll pack and go. iâm not going anywhere without you. iâm not leaving you Rey,â sincerity forces it out of her like itâs been choking its way to the back of her tongue this whole time.  thereâs a curl of her mouth; her murmur spins, kind, true. she knows her mind will wander to their parents leaving them behind. something she canât see herself doing.
sheâs never going to let her sister be declined. sheâll pull out a fight and get them both out alive. itâs a promise. to her, and herself.
 trying to warm her up ; she pinches the curve of Reyâs nose with crinkles at the corners of her eyes.â you heard me? if you canât be here. canât do this    we can leave,â the suggestion is open. sheâs not about to let this whole crusade dig a hole between them. not after everything theyâve been through. itâs them against the world. no way sheâll let anything break that.  Â
âNo.â Rey shakes her head, brushing away invisible tears. She doesnât want to have another night like this, all weepy and useless. Sheâs better than that. Sheâs done crying about where theyâve come from and where they might be going. âWe arenât going anywhere...Iâll be alright.â
To prove it, she gives her sister a soft smile and a laugh as her nose is pinched. She bats Kiraâs hand away playfully and looks over to the door, as though trying to will herself to be brave enough to go back to her room. She can do this, canât she? Sheâll be fine. Sheâll be fine.
âI just need sleep, thatâs all.â she murmurs, âAnd something good to eat in the morning.â
But even if she wants to be bold and strong, sheâs just...not there yet. Not right now.
â...can I...stay in here tonight? I promise we wonât be late for roll call in the morning.â
darkxreyâ:
Done being hungry half the time ⊠ at the eye of the hurricane  &  so they can SWALLOW the moment of quiet.  like a mouthful swelling the sucked vacuum of her lungs.  DONE SEEKING HOME as though the last maelstrom time could be snuffed  &  silenced in so simple a decision. Â
Joining the first order was the right thing to do.
she knows her sister will get used to this regimen. she wants her to. for both their sake. ever since they were kids, Kira had always been more of a leader than a followee. sheâs always try to keep her sister in check, to do what was needed and go back to their atat with their prizes. a routine ; one she seeks everywhere she goes. it provides her a sense of security.
â youâd think after nearly ten years they wouldâve come back by now if,â she doesnât want to say. but itâs ticking in the back of her head. that truth that weight on her shoulders.â if they were still alive,â she breathes out. hating herself for popping Reyâs bubble.â look - itâs not wrong. weâre⊠you have me,â she insist.â iâm right here and we can do this. together.â
Rey slumps even further, knowing full well that what Kira says is true. No one had come back for them so far, no one was likely to now. They had grown up in solitude, and if they went back, they were likely to die in solitude as well. Just the two girls in the desert, wasting away.
She sniffles and wipes at her nose, nodding her head along with Kiraâs words. Sheâll work on accepting it, sheâll work on being better. It just isnât easy.Â
â...Iâm grateful I have you.â she whispers, âIâm just...not like you. I donât fit in here, I canât seem to figure anything out.â
Her mind wanders to the uniform sheâs ripped, the commands she couldnât remember, the food sheâd stolen from the mess hall. Kira excelled in this environment. Why couldnât she be more like her sister?
âWhat if...what if they decide they donât want me?â