a suggestive spell, like the one the potions in the food cast, only took you so far, especially when watered down. alexander could have gone throughout the night in blissful ignorance, just living for the kisses and the cuddles, wherever he was to get them from was irrelevant as long as he had a man holding him in bed. but that man, thankfully, turned out to be maximus. his beloved maximus, the one man he wanted to have forever. that sensation, that oh so familiar sensation of having been bitten, and now being held against his loverâs bare torsoâŠit strung a chord inside alexander. for just one moment, that sugarcoat that clouded his brain dissipated. bits of it banished with the bite, but it wasnât until the aftermath came that he truly felt the spell wear off- not completely, it was powerful magic after all. but the human brain was just as powerful, arguably much more complex. and that was a human brain, mind you. a witchâs one was not as easy to curse.
the hand on his skin was what prompted alex to open his eyes again, green irises fixed on the wall his head was facing in their bedroom. their bedroom, how stupid - maxâs bedroom. but thatâs where the familiarity kicked in, and it hit hard. there was a time where they would live together, alexander wearing a mask while deceiving maximus into loving him. but that mask was gone, and yet the scene played out frame by frame, just in a new background. the witchâs smile was gone, and obviously didnât want to show that to his lover. he simply snuggled himself against the strong body, not minding a bit the chill. he wanted to warm him up, he wanted to give him all the love and warmth max had given him once. and, after everythingâŠstill did. a lazy, quiet question, one he thought he knew the answer of, but that part of him that was still enchanted by the cake begged to hear it come from those beautiful lips anyway. maximus loved paul dwight once, butâŠ
âmaxâŠdo you love me?â
THE QUESTION EVOKED a draw of breath, hopefully quiet, but sudden in nature. it wasnât the answer that was the issue, no, he loved alexander to lengths unknown & that was something that never seemed to waver in the guaranteed uncertainty of life. it was the weight surrounding that promise that frightened maximus. god, he loved alexander in ways even his enhanced, experienced form couldnât muster enough to accurately express. it was the kind of love that easily overwhelmed, beckoned disbelief, and entirely challenged who you were. how could he express that with a quaint âyesâ? the thought of alex misunderstanding the weight of how he felt, seemed like an insufferable fate.
he resents his current inability to seem happier. âalex,â he begins, still figuring out the taste of that newfound name on his tongue. his head lolls back and forth to himself as he scrambles for the right words, considering, gazing at the ceiling among other vague places in between. â..i love you in ways that terrify me.â maximus decides. he thinks about all that time spent, bent over this idea that one day heâd reunite with this glimmering concept of a man he once loved and cherished, and he remembers that feeling of loss and how much it felt like a dagger to his heart and back. he thinks of all those things heâd never dare tell his lover, in fear of sprouting guilt or a sense of dangerous obligation. he supposed it was exactly love that caused that urge for restraints in order to protect someone else above yourself. his next words are said with a light bout of familiarity-evoked laughter, âi love you in ways that exceed who iâve always been. stubborn and relentless,â
he traces circles on their skin as he continues, glancing around the room with leisure. âyouâve always come to me in this particular way.. a way that is entirely unavoidable to me.â a pause, âeven when weâre apart.. i think of you, and then i look at you and i just know. itâs like iâve found this one thing that makes everything else so much easier to understand.â he worries about the severity of that, and how that would come off. either way, he finds himself going on. âi think i wasnât prepared to lose that so suddenly, but i never once stopped loving that person i knew.â is said with a certain confidence, yet heâs quick to correct himself on one account; âthe person i know.â