𝗋𝖾𝗀𝖾𝗇𝖼1𝖾𝗌 is a dependent , private and multi - muse writing blog associated with seasonsfm . envisioned by e ( she + her , gmt - 3 ) . do not interact if not a member of the group .
" so you lied. " she repositions her body as amelia lies down. she props herself up with her elbow, head leaning on her knuckles. " is it because of what was written? do you still have feelings for ... " what was his name again? " ... " the pause is long. " herbert. " the names in britain are hard to remember. " who have you been spending time with for your spirits to be so low? surely, not herbert. " she narrows her eyes, why is amelia trying to be hard to read? mali would not allow her to change the subject by asking the same question in return. " is your brother already trying to make you compete in the marriage mart? "
“ maybe . ” it wasn't a question , so amélia owed her no answer . the laugh that came out of her after hearing the wrong name mali managed to come up with would be considered by any finishing lesson tutor unbecoming of a lady . “ no , that is not it . herbert and i are a thing of the past , whistledown might have seen us speaking , but did not realise there was no romance present in that awkwardly confrontational talk . ” they masked it with fake politeness too well . “ surprisingly , no . he has left me in charge of deciding when i shall start a search for a spouse . i guess the problem is that i do not know if that is what i want . ” she turned to look at mali . “ can you see yourself as a wife ? ”
it was a flaw to admit that sevda kept away from whispers that did not pertain to her and the durmaz family specifically. she found it terribly gauche to pay heed to rumours. although most found a gossip column to be proof enough, sevda hated to lean into rumours. so, she was hopelessly unaware of such arrangements between the miss castelo and the very lord she'd felt her gaze fall upon so naturally. "oh, safiye is off doing something of great interest to herself, i imagine." her little sister was birdlike thing, a hummingbird bouncing from one flower to the next. "you could join us, if you'd like — later, in the maze?" strength in numbers and all. inshallah she would not lead them lost. “the more the merrier.”
“ oh , no , i would hate to impose on your sisterly activity . i shall explore the maze with my chaperone . ” which only meant she would go in alone and hope not to be seen by anyone , or that a large group also found itself in there and she could pretend to be a part of it . “ speaking of , i should get back to my brothers ; i have been wandering around unsupervised for a bit too long . ” when in reality she was the one who wanted to make sure neither of her older brothers had gotten into any trouble since she last saw them . “ it was great seeing you . ”
"and i should happily assist if the need arises again," arthur answers earnestly, for he did not discriminate between princess and mama. under his careful eye, all women should enjoy the water if they so wished! at least it would save him the need to further shed his garments. he pats himself dry rather successfully, only his hair still sopping. the shirt was another story. that was still completely sodden even after he'd wrung out the droplets, more water hidden in its folds like a double-coated dog. "ducks do not attack," he offers helpfully in their defence. at least, he did not think they did. "i am rather fond of peaceable creatures." arthur preferred to imagine a kinship between him and them. “it is hard to enjoy fiercer things at a near distance.”
“ it is good to know your heroism knows no bounds . unless … ” she turned to face him , left eyebrow raised slightly . “ it is limited only to pond victims . ” in which case , the odds dwindled the need of keeping that information in the back of her mind for future reference . not that amélia would run to him if ever seeing another in need of saving ― or were she in need herself ― , but she would love to watch and see if the man truly did have that instinct or this was a one-time occurrence. “ geese do . i know that for a fact , i almost lost a finger . ” an exaggeration , she almost lost a glove . “ that i agree with . but i also think animals are good judges of character , there is no greater validation than a fierce creature being meek towards you . ”
" clearly not secretive enough if i was still somehow sniffed out. " it made him wonder... does the writer know the identity of the girl he was with and opted to leave her name out to save her from a ruined reputation? " amé, you haven't tried! " he laughs at her lack of determination. though, he could not blame her since he would do the same in her position. " really? — " his laughter echos louder as she continues. it amuses him to know how vocally enamoured sevda is of benedict. " does she have amnesia? i find it hard to believe she selectively chose not to remember your history with benedict. you are safi's close friend. " he wonders if safiye knows and how she would react. learning more about sevda and her behaviours only confirms how superficial she really is. " i would have never thought she would be the type to boast about such things. "
“ fael , you could not possibly believe you would have true privacy at the palace , the most guarded place in all of england . ” she refused to believe he was that silly . “ and i will not , i want you to tell me ! ” because speculating and coming to a conclusion did not mean she knew what had happened , and the writer only knew so much , not enough for amélia . “ see , that is what i thought as well , that she was doing it to either be cruel or get some reaction out of me . or , dear god ― ” she turned , as if something clicked in her head . “ do you think that was her way of claiming him ? perhaps she thought i still had interest , and there was competition . how do i let her know she can have him subtly ? ”
he returns shortly after, weaving through the crowd with a small porcelain plate balanced easily in his hand. " good, you are still upright, " he slows as he reaches her and makes note of her posture, her colour, then presents her the plate. " let us keep it that way. i should hate to be on the receiving end of your brothers' contempt. i should have asked if you had any preferences. " it's a semblance of a question, which, in his mind, is as good as the real deal. the assortment he offers is as considered and extensive as can fit on the tiny dish – a cucumber sandwich with trimmed crusts, a chicken tartlet, a lemon sponge square dusted with sugar. nothing that might turn her stomach in the heat.
“ you can hardly be faulted for anything that could have happened , so there is no reason to worry about my brother's contempt . especially since i am alive and well still . ” in an attempt to prove her words , she opened her arms halfway , palms facing up , and smiled . “ i do not ! ” she did , but he had already been kind enough to fetch her something , giving him a list of her preferred taste would be abusing his kindness . “ i truly am most grateful for your help . i do hope you are enjoying your day , or at least were until i whisked you away . but entertain me for a second , ” she started , picking up the sandwich . “ would you ever marry into royalty to have this life , knowing every step you take is overanalysed ? ”
she watches closely as amelia settles on the word – freeing. " oh, how terribly inconvenient, " there's no mockery in her tone, but perhaps something wistful ? "–to have discovered that there are places where one might live without constant observation and, yet, you must find yourself back in mayfair. " why had the castelos returned to london ? a handsome dowry could have very much granted them a happy life in the americas, or even in brazil ! she is certain that amelia was perfectly capable or making her share of friends during her time away. " last season was full of events with very little consequence. i assure you, you did not miss anything worthy of note. i suspect your tales from abroad will prove far more interesting than anything you had left behind here. "
“ not inconvenient , simply unexpected . my brother's marriage , the return , it all happened so rapidly that , by the time i could wrap my head around it , we were halfway across the ocean already . i did not― ” she stopped mid sentence , realising what she was about to say and that it gave way to solidifying what were , so far , only rumours about their family as truth . but then she remembered who it was she spoke with and only lowered her tone . “ did not think us returning a possibility . ” the admission came with an air of discomfort that she quickly shook away . “ things feel rather different , though i cannot place in what sense . but i assume having been here , the changes might not have been as noticeable . i do hope this season has more to offer if the last two were a bore . are you looking to take a husband ? ”
" i am disappointed. i thought you would have said you were here to see me. " she closes her book shut, finally looking to amelia. " i am not interested in telling you about my book. i want to know how you've been. " she stands up, finding comfort on the bed, patting the spot beside her.
“ perhaps i would have if you so much as looked at me when i first came in . ” she challenged , moving to lie down next to mali as invited . “ before arriving in london , great . how i have been since is possibly yet to be decided , if i am being honest . i need to spend more time with you , should lift my spirits . how have you been ? ”
“ so there i was , walking into queen anne's conservatory as if i belonged there because no one had told me it was a ladies only venue . the dirty looks i got i shall never forget . if only i had my daughter with me . ” he would have still been wrong , but a wrong man with a better reasoning than lack of information . were children even allowed there either ? god , he sounded so idiotic . “ it was not intentional . ”
the last of the night's opera finishes as DAIRO SAKIYAMA stands among those restless enough to depart from their boxes.
pipe smoke drifts around the small group waiting; whether it was for the opera to conclude or to catch sight of someone, dairo was still trying to decipher. he wasn't away for long, and yet, he sensed the distance of years widening the chasm even more between polite society and him. it would do him well to stay polite --- but irritation always flashes hot and quick.
"i dare say the quality has suffered since i last attended. unfortunate."
“ serves you right for inviting me here . ” it wasn't that kaito disliked the performing arts , especially not the opera , but it was one of those activities that lacked , well , activity . barely any speaking or socialising or anything happening away from the stage , it was almost as dull as the days in grisham house . “ shall we march on to white's ? ” would his cousin still be accepted there ? oh , well …
“ no , you missed two ladies falling into a pond . different things altogether. the real question is why you are reading a gossip paper at a gentleman's club , that is a drawing room over tea activity . ”
walking to be seen - she understands it in principle of course. it is the responsibility of members of the ton to lead society. to engage with peers and promote civic duty. so the viscountess of greywell is here, pausing to carefully peruse each vendors' goods. she inquires about the origin of the lace in the fans at one stall. at another cart, she convinces the seller to tell her exactly what avantika was smelling underneath the sandalwood in the bar of soap. if she has garned curious looks, the occasional double take if someone recognized her all these years later...hm. well, she couldn't pretend to be surprised. best to focus on what was in front of her. "pardon me - may i look at that pamphlet?"
the question caught him off-guard ; being a somewhat late arrival , it seemed kaito had missed a lot not having been in london for the queen's garden party . so there he was , at the park , reading all about it in a gossip column . until someone asks for it . he looks at her , quizzical look on his face . “ but i am reading it . ” and genuinely curious about what the next few lines exposed . “ can you wait a bit ? i just got to the part about the princes fighting. ”
𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 . fujiwara kaito . 𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 . n/a . 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡 . february 27th , 1781 . 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 & 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐬 . cis man & he + him . 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 . heterosexual & heteromantic . 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡 . grisham house , brighton . 𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 . english , japanese . 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 . mayfair , guest of the sakiyamas . 𝐦𝐛𝐭𝐢 . esfp ( the entertainer ) . 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬 . married . 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐧 . hina ( 4 ) . 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 . english , japanese , greek , french , latin , spanish , german . 𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 . viscount of grisham .
⊹ 𝑏𝑖𝑜𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑝ℎ𝑦 .
it is a sad thing to say someone has never considered themselves to be destined for great things , but it was just kaito's way of thinking . he knew of his reality however , the first and only son of a viscount had no other choice but to inherit the title , no other person to leave it to . did not change the fact that he'd never seen himself as someone who could handle the responsibilities that came with the name . as a child , he excelled at everything only because he had to , and he was never one to enjoy seeing disappointed looks in his parents' faces or be on the receiving end of a telling off for lack of motivation with his studies ― which was always the case . same with his adolescence , carrying all the way through adulthood ; he does things the proper way solely because it is expected of him . had he his way , kaito would be one of those people whose lives are dedicated to travelling and exploring with small to no responsibilities and all of their family's funds , but those were reserved for second or third sons , something he was not .
he met his wife at six and twenty , they spoke once at a ball , danced and suddenly heard whispers of how they would make the most perfect couple , how perfectly she was fit to be the future viscountess , saw the hopeful look in his parents' eyes and , before he even noticed , kaito had proposed . not out of love , or even infatuation , but because he knew he would have to one day , and this seemed fine . good enough . she was easy to talk to , apparently content with the life he had to offer , it was as good as he thought it could get for him . they married , had a daughter , and things continued to go smoothly . only there is no true passion in his marriage , he could see it in his wife's eyes she did not love him either , in fact they both seemed much happier when apart . it wasn't that he disliked her , on the contrary , he adored his wife , she was a great friend and amazing partner , but the romance lacked in an impossible to miss way .
and then , before last season begun , his father passed making him the viscount officially . he panicked , needless to say , not being ready as he thought he'd had more time , but alas , now his responsibilities tripled , and he felt on the brink of madness . chose to sit that social season out in order to get his affairs in check . what a mistake it was , being stuck at home all year with nothing but the things he couldn't be less excited about , only made him all the more agitated , aching to be away , even if only for a week . so when this season started and he heard tale of his cousins , the sakiyamas , making their way to london , he did not make the same mistake , immediately packing some of his things and calling for a carriage . only not before convincing his wife to stay at the estate at least until he settled in london and could send word for her to join . his selfish way of getting away from the life he was nothing but okay with if only for a fortnight .
⊹ 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑦 .
esfp , the entertainer : extraverted , sensing , feeling , perceiving . traits : bold , enthusiastic , positive thinking , hands-on , talkative , sensitive , poor planner , conflict avoidant , easily bored , unfocused . love languages : words of affirmation , physical touch .
" you are too nosy. " there are not very many secrets kept between them, he did it more out of courtesy for sevda. he is a rake, but he still maintains a level of consideration. " if you must know. she is someone mentioned. take a guess. " he takes a bite of his food. " and how was your reunion with benedict? "
“ i have no choice , you are being too secretive . ” not that it invalidated his point , she was nosy , but it was all the more reason to simply tell her or else it would consume her mind , and she would be constantly nagging him about the secret . “ please , i am awful at guessing and you know so . ” she would pick up the paper later and mark with her own pen any names of dark haired ladies . “ disastrous , as anticipated . he said he wrote to me while we were away and seemed so very upset i never wrote back , only i did not receive a single letter . i do not understand why he would even be upset , he clearly has his interest elsewhere . sevda spent quite a lot of time speaking of the time they spent together that afternoon and praising him to me , i do not believe i had ever been so uncomfortable . ”
granville house, with a handful of teenagers and two bewildered chaperones
feat. bernard alderidge ( @regenc1es )
thomas had grown exponentially since she had last saw him last christmas, and had inexplicably started an intense new interest in the italian language. wendy had bought every book she possibly could, even seeking out merchants that had just made the voyage back from the south of the continent ! the thought of her stepson practically begging her for a trip to gallivant through the continent had been cause enough to send word to the boys' godfather, only slightly desperate in her worry.
" is it a girl? had he been introduced to an italian lady by one of his classmates in eton? " wendy looked up from her ledgers at bernard, the sun streaming brilliantly through the windows of her office. " him and william have been whispering to each other over tea the entire weekend and stopped abruptly when i enter the room. marianne keeps complaining that they refuse to include her in their conversations for it is 'not proper for young ladies'. " the baroness frowned, her brows furrowed in confusion and frustration. " did you and your brothers make much trouble for your mother at age 17? i'd like to think that they are harmless, but thomas had always possessed an overly active imagination... "
“ you worry too much ! ” he started calmly , sat comfortably on the setee across from her , holding a biscuit bernard was yet to decide whether he really wanted to eat or had picked up out of habit . “ they are approaching adulthood , their school years are nearly over , it is normal to start wondering of what else is there in the world . why not compromise ? let him do the grand tour , it shall do him good , satisfy this curiosity while also preparing him for the future . i did it . ” whether his godson had taken such an interest in italy for a girl or not bernard would not say , as it was not his place to . “ i cannot speak for my brothers . ” by the time barron turned seventeen bernard was already married and living at heartford house , not quite present for the rebellions , and when it was benedict's turn he was living in the countryside away from everyone else drowning in his own grief . “ but i do not believe i did . in fact , my mother would tell you i am much more of a headache now than i was then . but you need not worry , as active as his imagination might be , i do not think him capable of fleeing the country chasing a girl . him asking you for the trip is proof he could not be so reckless . ”
the whole day, she had been pacing back and forth in her room, punishing herself for last night. she should not have accepted the invitation to meet bernard alderidge at vauxhall. she was put on the spot! how was she supposed to say no in front of so many people at the opera with the possibility of whistledown being around the corner? the writer would definitely dramatize something this small! after all, whistledown is the reason for her anxieties... wenyi has to remind herself — at the end of the day, benedict did not do anything inherently wrong. and, of course, he had options! he is an alderidge! however, she did not want her little sister to be discouraged and feel as if she did not have a chance to begin with. and though she would not like to admit it, bernard aldridge possibly compromising feyza's season continues to weigh heavily on her mind.
" i did not anticipate the weather... " she looks up to the sky rather than finishing her sentence. the grey clouds and the slight breeze unexpectedly lift her mood. if it were to start raining, she could delay a possible confrontation or maybe not see him at all! she could take the time to think of a new plan for xinyi and find different suitors and also help her friend.
he looked up as well , despite having zero interest on the weather . “ it does look a lot more like the london we are used to when the social season is over . ” but weather talk was for people who knew not more than one another's names , or not even that , he did not want to speak of the lack of sun or possibility of rain . “ i know the society paper of this week made our situation a tad complicated , but even so i do not believe it to be entirely bad . ” was he wrong ? saying benedict was seeing speaking to two other ladies was nothing in comparison to him expressing to call upon miss zhao , or them going to the opera together . “ so i want you to speak freely with me , tell me what you think of the matter . ” because he still saw it as a better outcome than the blatant refusal he was met with when first proposing the idea to his brother . it was progress , if anything .
"you are too good to me," the dowager viscountess sighs gratefully, rising from where she sits. abandoning the measure of her temperature, yu jie accepts his arm, selfishly squeezing the strength of his bicep only once. there would be time for more of that later. "you act as if he is a boy," yu jie laughs blithely. "he is near a man. considers himself to be, at least." and would hate to spend any time with her at all. he kept her at a distance and she did not know how to close it, unsure of how to relate to her troubled boy. "griffin is the least of our worries," she hums quietly. she did not want to think of him now. matching his healthy stride with quickened steps, they cut through the crowd until it thins and the neigh of horses draws nearer. "i imagine that your family should be sufficiently distracted for the time being, tending to your sister." she offers the alderidge a sidelong glance, searching for his concern, wondering if he has any thoughts on the party's devolvement. her lips take a serpentine curve, "i suggest you tell me now if you schemed all this to have me to yourself."
“ it has been a while since i myself was five and ten , and my godchildren can hardly be considered a parameter for what regular adolescents behave like . ” or maybe they do and that was much worse . “ so i might have the idea of how they act wrong . ” not that it mattered , all he really wanted to know was if they'd be interrupted . and once he got the confirmation that it would not be the case , her son stopped being a topic of conversation . the carriage was quick to arrive and , soon as it did and the door was open , his hand was offered as help for her to climb in before him . “ you would have to call me the most skilled of planners if i were responsible for all of that happened this afternoon . caroline accidentally knocking over a table could have been my doing ― which it was not ― , but i could not possibly have planned the pond and the fight and the failed engagement as well . instead , i believe fate was simply aware of how much i wanted to get you alone and was on my side . ”
