What I learned from my 3-Day Juice Cleanse.
I hate healthy juice. That is what I learned. One may ask, âWhy do a juice cleanse? Are you trying to lose weight? Taking on a healthier lifestyle?â My response, âLOL. No. I love me some In-N-Out and Milk Jar Cookies way too much.â I really wanted to do a juice cleanse because I have lived in LA for two and half years, and havenât tried one yet. I feel like itâs an Angelinos right of passage. Iâve already jumped on the hiking and wearing workout clothes in public bandwagon. Also Iâve learned to bake gluten-free sweets and make my own organic butter, so a juice cleanse seemed like the next step.
Now a lot of people think juice cleanses are hard. They make you feel miserable and all you can think about is the moment you can eat real food. Surprisingly, that wasnât the case for me. I found it easy. Lies. I couldnât stop pursuing Pinterest for new recipes. Jk. Sort of⊠To be honest the hardest thing was actually getting past the taste of all the green. So much green!!!! Not a fan. I like my juices full of sweet, fruity flavors. Kale and celery are the last thing I want to cross my lips as I am sipping on some juice. And I canât forget to mention that awful taste that I could not get out of my mouth. It was like a mixture of garlic and raw potato skin. That was the moment when I couldnât understand why juicing all of these fruits and vegetables was better for you than just eating them.
I scoured the internet for a reasonâŠ. And by that I mean I Googled âjuicing rather than eating vegetables.â I know genius, right? I found an article that explained juicing gives you more nutrients than eating and it removes indigestible fiber. Ok. That makes sense, and gives a reason as to why everyone and their baby is so obsessed with juice in LA⊠because of all of their stomach âproblemsâ. Stomach problems are in fact the trendiest of all problems to have, but I digress.Â
Now for my experience with the juices that I drank throughout the cleanse. Recipes from here.
Morning Green Juice #1: Kale, Spinach, Romaine, Cucumber, Celery, Apples, Parsley
Ok. Disgusting. Point blank. I should have realized that my first juice cleanse should not come from a website titled âVeganCooking.Comâ. Mistake number one. Meat and cheese are life in my mind. So taking juicing advice from someone who hasnât had either in years probably wasnât the best idea. Miss Kristen Marie, blogger of this cleanse, has a much more developed palette than I when it comes to greens.
Morning Juice #2: Apple, Pineapple, Mint, and Lemon
I had high hopes for this baby. But I think I made a huge mistake by making the liquid salad (Juice #1) before this one, and it tainted the flavor.
Green Juice #3: Kale, Spinach, Celery, Grapes, Pear, and Cucumber
Seriously couldnât taste the difference from the first two.
Juice #4: Ginger Apple Limeade
One a scale of one to Vegan, Paleo, Crossfit Junkie, this juice seemed like it would be about a Magic Bullet Healthy Cooking Infomercial. I was the most excited about this one, because after Juice #1 I knew green is not the way for me. In juice and life. Sorry haters but I get my Diet Coke in a Styrofoam cup from McDonaldâs. Itâs so much better that way⊠So, Ginger Apple Limeade. I was actually really disappointed. Totally left me hanging. It actually grew my hatred for gingers. Except for you Prince Harry. You are still my number one.
Juice #5: Beet, Broccoli, Kale, Parsley, Celery, Grape and Apple
Real talk for a second. This is the one that really got me. About 15 minutes after drinking half of it (which took me 2 hours) I had to run to restroom. On top of that horrific event, every time I do something with beets, I can still taste a hint of dirt. Definitely not appetizing.
Juice #6: Vanilla Almond Date Shake
Now I actually enjoyed this one, but only after I filtered out the ground almonds. I think it is because it was the sweetest and reminded me of milk. Oh milk. And cheese. I miss you.
It seems that I had a pretty miserable time while on this cleanse, hating the taste of just about every juice and bashing it. But⊠I really had a good time. I think Iâll be sure to do a little more research for my next cleanse to find juices I actually like, like 100% Martinelliâs Apple Juice and Orange Juice from Lucyâs Diner (my favorite Mexican place). Overall a good first experience. Now that I have completed my cleanse, have blogged about it, and have a more positive outlook on life, I think I can say I am officially an Angelino!