Is this hell or are we even?

Remy Alaire. Apothecary in the Spring court.

[remyalaire]

( François Arnaud , 40/500, Remy Alaire, cismale, he/him + Illyrian ) Underneath the sparkling sky, did you see FRANÇOIS ARNAUD being tipped by the Cauldron? No, that's just REMY ALAIRE, who is the APOTHECARY from SPRING. I heard that on most days he’s MODEST and INSIGHTFUL but if you catch them on a dark night, they can be VULNERABLE and COWARDLY. But if you really get to know them, you'll know that they vibe with DIRTY HANDS, A FULL GARDEN, A WARM BEVRAGE ALWAYS AT HAND.

[pinterest]

BASICS

FULL NAME: Remy Alaire

AGE: 500

PLACE OF RESIDENCE: Spring court

GENDER: Cismale

PRONOUNS: He/Him

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Bisexual

TITLE: Apothecary

FACECLAIM: François Arnaud 

BIOGRAPHY

Being born an Illyrian and placed into a camp was meant to forge a killing machine. A perfect little soldier with no fear or feelings, not even a name, just on more number. Twelve. They tried to kill every weakness, break his spirit but there was something in him that wasn’t willing to stop him from dreaming. There was more to life than pain and suffering, he could feel it, he could almost taste it in the nights he spent whispering questions in the air, looking at the stars and knowing, just knowing someone was listening. He was listening. His cohort, Seven.

The night Seven took his hand and pulled him away from the camp, that was the first time he felt unbreakable and fearless. But it was short lived. He managed to escape but when he looked back, Seven wasn’t behind him. Instead, there was an arrow through him and he was down. He covered his mouth in horror as the tears that he had never lent to suppress, fell down his cheeks. He heard someone say Seven was dead so there was only one good thing he could do for him. Run.

So he ran and ran and ran past his bleeding feet and burning lungs. He ran until his body couldn’t keep up anymore. He didn’t know how far he got before his body collapsed.

When he woke up in the Spring court, he didn’t know where he was but he was finally free. He gave himself a name, one of those he used to dream about with Seven. Remy.

Remy had to learn to live a life in freedom, with others. He hid in the village and watched faes, tried to learn from them and he slowly started to integrate into their life. All he wanted was to be good. Have a peaceful life. For Seven. He learnt how to be an apothecary, getting himself a little shop with a small room above it and that was enough for him.

After years passed and Remy was settled in his new life, he found a young lost fae wandering the woods behind his home. They seemed lost, just as lost as he was when he first arrived in Spring. Remy took them in and swore to protect them like he couldn’t do with Seven.

[flreclouds]

she would hope that the fae near his home would look after his horse. she knows that karasu had befriended some of the market vendors and had looked out for the crows, but horses do not have free reign to come and go as they please the way the crows do, normally. “they do have their structure in the back, but they’ll come in with you if they want to spend time with you. they don’t usually come inside when no one is home. perhaps i’ll do morning food and you could take the evenings, if you want, and we’ll just both refill as we need to when we’re around if they need. they have a fountain back there for water so they don’t have to ever wait for me. and if they want food and we don’t get there first, they are good at taking care of themselves.” after all, the crows had done so without her for plenty of time before she’d befriended them. “i do think they will like you. i have a good feeling.” it’s again an offer she normally wouldn’t make, but she would never tell someone that their family is unwelcome, if she has welcomed them, unless there was a reason for her to not want that family around. “nonsense, of course i will. she’s your kid. family. if she doesn’t want to stay, she of course does not have to. but if you want to stay together while in starlight, i would not ask you to return to staying at one of the inns in order to be with her. and if it’s only to visit and not to stay, she is welcome to do that as well.” there is no requirement for anything, but astoria doesn’t want anyone to be separated from their family just because they worry it will impose on her. family is important to many — she often wished her own had been better. even though she and her siblings remain on good terms, it has been a while since any of them have checked in. “i will ask around if anyone knows anything. let florencia know that she should ask around with the vendors at the market. they’re usually quite helpful.” she understands not wanting to go out, especially in an unfamiliar court. “it’s okay not to want to spend much time out. this is an unfamiliar place, and it’s crowded with all the other courts here. i will ask around, and if florencia is looking around as well, someone will surely be able to point her out. do you know anyone else who might know her that i could ask?”

[remyalaire]

The arrangement sounded more than fair and Remy was happy to help feed the crows so he nodded. He was going to learn as he went but he was sure the crows weren't as different as the animals that lived around his cottage in Spring. Even if they were all his, he took care of their needs whenever they were around. "I'll make sure they have food in the evenings. I'm probably going to be here.." Like he said, he didn't go out much anyway and he wanted to stay away from whatever was happening in the palace.

Whenever he met new fae, even when he first moved to Spring, Remy had to prove he wasn't a monster before anyone treated him well and didn't shush him away. This sort of kindness from a stranger wasn't something he was used to so the offer and the care Astoria was putting on him and, potentially, his kid, it touched him. He teared up a little so he quickly chuckled, feeling silly. "I'm sorry, don't mind me." He looked away as he laughed and dried his eyes. "This is more than I could ever ask of anyone. Please, do not hesitate on revoking any of this at any time. I'll understand." All his life, he was used to standing guard and ready for things to go wrong.

Remy turns back and nods as Astoria sounds understanding of his predicament, "I can ask around when I go down to the shops as well. When in Spring, I usually go first thing in the morning when they're just opening." He's made friends with the vendors there after making sure they trusted him. When he first moved, they were scared of him, they had all heard horrible things about Illyrians and Remy couldn't blame them, all of the things done to him were done by other Illyrians after all. "Thank you Astoria, truly."

[lightcfaureleigh]

AYLIN WASN'T SURE IF THE MAN WAS REASSURING HER OR HIMSELF AT THIS POINT. Still, he did not seem like a threat - he seemed a bit lost, but given how they were all in an entirely new court, she wasn't entirely surprised by it. She, too, had felt lost - and she'd reckoned everyone else had shared that sentiment.

but, it's not like they could do anything about it yet.

They were all stuck here - and a bit of innocent spying on her surroundings was definitely a smart idea. "It is. I have to remember to ask one of the Starlight people about it. I doubt this is their secret animal. But, then again, everything in here was kept secret from the rest of us. I do wonder why." she spoke, frowning at the latter.

why keep an entire court a secret?

Aylin lightly chuckled at the latter. "yeah, birds are great, don't get me wrong. But, they're not as awe inspiring as the creature in front of us, or the Night court's shadow foxes. They're just plain, slightly larger eagles than those seen in other courts." she remembered to explain her commentary from before. "So, I take it you're Spring court, then? Or at least a frequent visitor? Have you been to Dawn?" she found herself chatting up.

[remyalaire]

Remy didn't wonder why. He didn't wonder about much. He wasn't even that surprised about a hidden court because he didn't know all the courts, honestly so this wasn't as much of a shock and betray to him as it was to everyone else. "Secret animal or not, they are a marvel to see. I feel privileged to witness all these new sights, even if I long to go home."

All animals were awe inspiring to Remy, no matter the size, it was more about the things they could do and the way they weren't conditioned by other's look on them. He envied that a little. "Yes, I live in Spring. I'm not from Spring, but I have been living there for a long time." He looked at his large wings, evidence that he was an Illyrian. "No, I have never been to Dawn. Other than the Illyrian camp I was raised in and Spring, I hadn't been anywhere else before the Winter ball." And that in on itself was a bit of an accident. He wasn't even supposed to be there.

[witchoftheshdows]

lia is now sat up a bit more, self cautiously brushing some hay and dirt off herself as she keeps lightly petting leto's feathers, and nodding before her brows furrow just a bit at his apology, immediately feeling embarrassed and shaking her head at the thought of him taking her flustered state the wrong way, because it was so far from the truth. "no, no please don't apologize." she's now pouting, eyes wide and it almost feels like a soft plea, not wanting him to ever feel like he has to apologize with her, especially not when she made a fool of herself like this. "i-it's...good to see you, really. i've actually been...wondering how you've been, I just...wasn't expecting to see you, is all...and you're not a bother. at all. I didn't know you knew astoria..." her head is hung low, looking down at the crow on her lap, and babbling out her response, and it only stops at his next words, where she looks back up at him, head gone fuzzy and cheeks going pink. he had been thinking of her. he was making bread for her. she stops, glancing down at the apron he had on, the small bit of flour that was on his nose. "....you're making bread for me?...that's really kind of you...i-i would have brought something with me, too if I'd known you were here..."

[remyalaire]

He watched her, not really understanding her reaction. Remy was terrible at ready and understanding others so he simply listened. He nodded when she asked him not to apologize and he won't if that's what she wants. When she doesn't make eye contact with him, something he knows now it's important when communicating, he feels bad that he had made her feel uncomfortable perhaps but he proceeds to explain why he was there. "I don't know Astoria— or rather I didn't know her when we met, that's why you didn't know. You couldn't possibly know." He added, "I hope that's alright? I wasn't sure if this was allowed. Perhaps it isn't but it has been good, being here where there's more space."

When her cheeks turn pink, he wonders again if he has said something wrong or uncalled for but having her sitting out here like neither of them are here or there, he opens the back door a little wider and steps out. "There was no need, you already brought something to me. It was a way of thanking you for your gifts. Would you like to come and wait inside? I can make you some tea. Or coffee? I think we stocked some as well." He gives her a soft but nervous smile, hoping that a warm beverage would make her more comfortable. "I hope you weren't affected by the ground shake. Is the inn alright?"

[flreclouds]

she twirls a strand of blue hair around her fingers, slipping through the market until she finds the fresh produce, plucking an apple from a stand. she starts to fill a basket, deciding she’ll see about getting access to a kitchen to bake, and pays for her fruit. she looks around the area, and her brow furrows when she sees the tips of illyrian wings a few fae ahead of herself, and she smiles when she realises it’s @remyalaire, relief washing over her since she hadn’t seen him since before winter. “remy!” the mind witch calls out, running to catch up with him and almost dropping apples from her basket.

[remyalaire]

The market was starting to fill up which was Remy's cue that he had been there most of his morning and it was time to head back to the cottage before it was too crowded. After the ground splitting under everyone, the stalls and shops had taken a big hit or so he noticed the next time he was there and the villagers and shopkeepers weren't able to fix up everything as fast as they could with so many fae around. Remy decided to start coming in early and lend a hand with whatever heavy rubble needed to be picked up and anything that was to tall to be fixed by anyone that wasn't as tall as the Illyrian.

He frowns when he hears a small voice calling out to him, not expecting anyone looking for him but he turns and sees it's Shriya saying his name. Remy relaxes and waits for her until he sees her basket threatening to spill so he steps in to help. "I'm not going anywhere, slow down." He says with a small, shy smile, saving one apple from almost falling and putting it back on the top of the pile. "Hello, Shriya, how are you doing this morning?"

[lightbcrn]

to: @remyalaire

He knew Remy's schedule. Not because he'd been tracking him... he hadn't been tracking him since their last meeting, because that would be strange and something he would need to explain. Virgil was good at patterns. Camp Morrock had trained him to notice routines. Remy left his residence (or what he assumed to be his temporary residence) every few mornings, early, when the market was still quiet. He walked to the village stalls, bought produce, sometimes dropped off bread at the shopkeepers' doors like he was delivering gifts instead of running errands. It was predictable and easy to remember. It was just... tactical awareness.

Virgil told himself he wasn't waiting. He was just passing through the area at the right time. A coincidence. It happened. He intercepted Remy between a fruit stall and the baker's, stepping out of from behind a broken column like he'd been inspecting it for damage.

"You take the same route every time." His voice is flat. "Same path, same time. It's predictable. Anyone could track you." A pause. "And no, I'm not tracking you. I just noticed." Too fast. Too defensive. "You should vary your route. For safety."

[remyalaire]

After his encounter with Virgil,— that was still hard to wrap his mind about, finally putting a name to the face and number he's held in his heart for so long— Remy kept mostly to himself, carefully tucked away in his new accommodations. A kind Starlight fae had let him stay at her cottage better suited for someone with wings and he reluctantly accepted the help. Now he tired to give back; to her for her hospitality and to whoever he encountered because he had no currency to buy anything but he could bake and cook and perhaps the shopkeepers could worry less about that with everything that was going on.

Remy was keeping himself away from what was happening behind the closed gates of Stellaria palace. He lost his powers, the ground split beneath them but he didn't ask any questions or tried to solve anything. He simply went on. More worried about finding his kid than anything else happening.

It almost gave him a heart attack when Virgil appeared from behind a column suddenly. He wasn't expecting to see him or anyone this early for that matter. Remy had been coming in early to help some of the villagers with moving big and heavy rubble for them after the rumble. "Oh—" he said, startled, taking a step back and adjusting the bags in his arm. "I... am not being tracked." He looked around, looked behind him and back at Virgil. "I don't think? Why would anyone track me?" He was irrelevant, just a no one.

"Hello Virgil." He then added because that was the proper way of greeting someone when you meet them or so he had been taught.

[flreclouds]

whether he goes out a lot or not, she wants him to be able to get in and out without issue, if she is out at the same time, since none of them can winnow right now. with everything else being difficult, she’d rather at least try to create some amount of comfort in all of this. and she appreciates that he does seem to want to help with things, even if she doesn’t want him to have to go out of his way. “i hope that he is alright as well. it must be hard to be away from him,” she says softly. she thinks the crows will like remy. he’s kind, genuine. they’re both awkward and the crows had taken to looking out for her. she’ll ask karasu to take care of him. she’s pretty sure leto or hannelore will grow attached as well. “i think the crows will like you.” she shrugs, “you won’t be in the way at all, don’t worry about trying to stay out of my way.” she tries to sound reassuring, watching as he walks around the room. she nods when he asks her to look out for his kid, “of course. if i meet her before you find her i will show her how to get here so you can be together again. she is, of course, welcome to stay if she wishes.” she has no intention of separating a family from each other if they are able to find remy’s kid. “i will ask around as well. hopefully someone will know something. did you get separated when we were all brought to starlight, or in winter?” she says softly.

[remyalaire]

He hoped that Rafi was alright as well. He trusted that the villagers in Spring would come in a check on him when they realized the High Family and Inner circle were gone and him along with them by accident. He shouldn't have let Dosia convinced him to sneak into that party but he was glad he didn't let her go in on her own, even though he wasn't sure where she was right now, at least he knew she was in Starlight and it was a matter of time before he found her. "I hope they will. I'll make sure they always have food and clean water and a way to come in if they want." Remy promised.

Astoria's offering caught him by surprise. By no means he was expecting her to let his youngling stay there as well, that was just too much to ask of her. He just wanted to know where she was staying so he could go see her and see that she was alright. "Oh, um— that's. You don't have to do that. I just want to make sure that she's alright. I'm worried." Remy admits. "There were talks about lives lost in Winter. I just really need to find her and see that she's alright." It's all he wanted, to see her. "Florencia is on the look out as well. I should go out and try to find her too but I just —" He panics, He sees a lot of fae and he panics and he can't think straight, he can't deal with the noises, he feels trapped again.

[lightbcrn]

Remy stepped closer and Virgil felt the walls closing in. Not the walls of the Starlight Court... those were silver and glass and cold, indifferent to everything happening on this balcony... but the walls inside his own head. The ones he'd built brick by brick in the hole. The ones that kept him upright when everything else was falling apart. The ones that Remy was threatening to dismantle just by standing there, just by looking at him, just by saying his name like it meant something.

"That must be nice," he said, and his voice was flat but there was something ugly underneath it. "To be yourself. To decide the number doesn't matter. Just walk away from everything they tried to make you." He laughed, a short and bitter sound with no warmth in it. His hands were still shaking. He shoved them into his pockets to hide it. "I think the number stuck just fine. I think you spent all of these years pretending you were someone new, pretending you were whole, pretending the camp didn't touch you. But it did. I can see it. It's in the way you stand. The way you flinch. The way you're looking at me right now like you're waiting for me to hit you." He tilted his head. "You're still Twelve. You're still the scared little boy who couldn't hold formation. You just got better at hiding it."

He wanted to stay. He wanted to grab Remy by the shoulders and shake him until all the softness fell out, until he stopped looking at Virgil with his soft doe eyes. He stepped back. His heart was swelling in his chest, traitorous and undeniable, and it made him furious. He could feel it in his throat, his temples, the scar on his wing. "You got your answer," he said, his voice quieter, colder. "You know I'm alive. That's more than I ever got." He turned toward the corridor and didn't look back, just walked, one foot in front of the other. The cold silver light and silence was waiting to swallow him whole again. It was easier in the silence. It had always been easier.

[remyalaire]

Every word Virgil said was probably true and right. Remy was still that scared little boy who couldn't hold formation and he was looking at Virgil like he was waiting for him to hit him. But he was sure he never pretended to be whole or like he left the camp behind because he never did. He carried it with him in every little interaction when he tried to make himself small in front of anyone. When he had to remind himself how to interact with other or to hug back when being hugged. Accept love and kindness and help.

The conditioning didn't work all the way but it didn't left scars like something that dug its claws when he tried to rip it off.

Remy watched Virgil walk away, fighting every urge he had to go after him but he couldn't move. He stood still in that balcony until the Illyrian was out of sight and then a broken sob spilled out of him. He took his hands to his face as he tried to process what just had happened. Virgil now knows he is alive as well which was also more than he ever got too.

[end of thread]

[ultra-violences]

François Arnaud

[flreclouds]

she would have understood if he’d declined the offer.  she’s still confused about herself. they’re not friends, nor is the red-headed girl who made the introduction. she supposed there is room to become friends. she’s not opposed to friends. she’s just distrustful. but she knows she’d be uncomfortable in the inns. between feeling congested by all the other fae and feeling like there is not enough space… and he’s taller and broader than her. his wings surely need more space than the inns can provide. and if he does not feel comfortable staying in his court’s area of the palace, that is his right.  “no, please keep it. i just did not want you to have to use my keychain if you do not want. but it is yours to do with what you wish.” she says. she smiles when he agrees about animals, “they’re predictable. animals behave how their instinct tells them. and they are far more loyal than the fae.” she hums. “none of us deserve them, and yet they remain with us when they decide we are a friend.” “yes, i have an oven. you are welcome to bake whatever you would like to,” she nods, smiling. “we can share the cleaning. i can’t ask you to clean up after me,” she replies. “i do prefer to keep things tidy so i try to do so.” she nods. her home was sparsely decorated, although she had trinkets the crows had brought her scattered throughout. “the one thing that does sort of look like trash is a bowl in the sitting room of miscellaneous shiny things like bottle caps that the crows have brought me. i don’t really know what to do with them but i feel bad if i do not keep the things they gift me.”

[remyalaire]

Remy kept the key chain and nodded, putting the key in his robe for safety for now. He wasn't sure he was going to be out of the house a lot, not far anyway but it was good that he could keep a key for whenever he needed to go into the village to get things, maybe help around with the shopping if Astoria wanted him to.

"I have a horse back home that I miss very much. I hope he's doing alright and that the fae in town are taking care of him." He explained to the Serpahim, perhaps in hopes she'll trust him with her brids. He had every intention of taking care of them and respect them like his own. Remy would never let anything bad happen to them.

He chuckles at the bowl of trash but understood. "Well, I appreciate you letting me stay here and use your kitchen and your cottage. I promise I won't get in your way much. I mostly keep to myself." He says. After all, it was the truth. He walked around the room for a moment and then looked back at Astoria with something in mind. She was a High Fae of Starlight and knew other fae here. Perhaps he could ask her to keep an eye out for Dosia. "I hope you don't mind me asking this but I've been looking for my— kid. Well, she— I —" How could he explain this to her. "If you ever come across someone named Dosia, Theodosia. Could you tell her I've been looking for her? That I'm staying here?"

[lightbcrn]

Remy's hand lifted, and Virgil saw it coming. Saw the intention in his eyes, the way his fingers extended toward the edge of his wing. His body reacted before his mind could catch up. A sharp flinch, a half-step sideways, his wing pulling back like a startled animal. Don't. The word slammed through his skull, but he didn't say it. He never said it. He just flinched and pulled away and hated himself for both.

"Don't touch my wings." His voice was rough, scraped raw. He cleared his throat and tried again, and it came out flatter this time, colder. "Don't touch me." His words echoed and he hated how they sounded. So harsh, cold, and final. He didn't mean them. Or he did mean them. He can't tell anymore. Remy touched his wing and Virgil flinched like a child. Like a recruit on their first day, like he hadn't spent decades learning to take a blow without moving. But it wasn't a blow and he still flinched. That was the problem.

"Remy," he echoed, and the name tasted different this time. Less bitter. More like something he was trying to understand. "You said you gave yourself a name. Just chose it like it was nothing. Like names aren't earned in blood. I don't..." He stopped, swallowed. "I don't understand how you could just decide you were someone new. How you could walk away from Twelve like it was a coat that didn't fit anymore." His wing was still pulled back, trembling slightly. He forced it to relax and forced his shoulders down.

"Vigilant. Then Vigil. Then Virgil." He said it flat, like a report. "That's what I was. That's what they made me. A watcher. A guard. Something that never rests."

[remyalaire]

But Remy wanted to. He wanted to touch him. Touch his face, his chest Feel his warm skin under his palm again. Seven, Virgil, got to touch him and even if it was rough and violent, the contact still warmed up and brought back to life something that was cold and dead inside him.

"Sorry, I'm sorry." He stepped back, even if he didn't want to, shaking his head, eyes fixed on the floor. His hand moved to touch the back of his neck while Virgil's back was towards him. Remy didn't know what to do but he knew he didn't want to leave. Not this time, not again. It will hurt to know that Virgil is here in the same court as him, under the same unrelenting stars of Starlight and he hates him. But he is alive. And that was enough for him.

It was the first time he heard his name coming out of Virgil's lips and it felt like it was the first time he heard it. Like he was giving it meaning, making sense of it. Even if it stung when he said it. "I don't know that I was ever Twelve. That I was ever just a number. I never wanted to be. I'm not someone new, I'm— me." Without the boot in his neck, Remy managed to be the person he wanted to be. With all the hardships that came with. He was all alone in the world when he left the camp and there was a void in the shape of Virgil that he could never fill with anything, with anyone. So he planted seeds around it so good things could grow from it and cover it without really hiding it. It made it bareable.

"Virgil." Remy nodded. "It makes sense. A watcher, a guard. Someone who cares and protects. It's what comes to mind when I think of you." The apothecary tried again and closed the space between them, slowly like he was approaching a hurting, scared animal. "Where did you end up?" He asked, softly.

[flreclouds]

she knows he didn’t want to impose on anyone, but she’s glad he didn’t decline. astoria’s cottage is spacier, and as scary as the seraphim seemed at first, she seemed… nice? maybe. and with things getting increasingly worse, she thinks they all need at least a little comfort. and remy, of all fae, deserves comfort. she does almost pull back when he freezes, but then leans closer when he hugs her back, relaxing when he rubs her back. she’s careful not to touch his wings, “good, i want you to be good. is astoria nice?” she asks as she steps into the house, looking around as she follows him into the sitting room. “me too. everything going on is… a lot. and confusing.” she murmurs.

[remyalaire]

Remy invites her to sit down at one of the sofas in the sitting room and in front of her, he had set up two cups of coffee, some freshly baked bread, butter and a blackberry jam he made himself as well. He wasn't sure where Florencia was staying nowadays so he wanted to make sure she was eating something. "I thought we could share some food while you came to visit, if that's alright with you. I made coffee just how you like it."

He sits next to her, careful to keep his wings out of the way, draping them behind the back of the sofa but they tower over them a little. "Astoria is perfectly polite. We get along." Remy wasn't sure if Astoria was nice just like he wasn't sure he was nice. But both of them were respectful, helpful. They were sharing the space just fine. A good match. "I don't mind the lack of power. It feels— odd but it's not like I had much use of it." Remy didn't fly much, especially not since they got trapped in Winter. And as of his fighting abilities, well, he hadn't use those in a lot longer than that. Remy lent in and whispered to her, even though they were completely alone for miles. "Are we— really in danger? Under threat?" He asked, terrified of the answer.

[admiraljia]

Jia pulled a strand of her colorful hair behind their ear. "No need to apologize, we've all been in such situations" It was odd being the one showing everyone around instead of the one that wandered.

They shook their head. "I have not been harmed, but there has been other things on my mind" Nothing that an apothecary could assist with, Jia figured. "I need to be out on the sea, getting some air" Jia pulled herself together. "The shops are a bit farther north than Stellaria Inn. It should not be difficult to spot.

[remyalaire]

Remy nodded politely— if not a little awkwardly "Again, thank you for your help." He gave them one last look before marching away and towards the shops and inn to find his way around this new court and see who he could find that he knew. He was usually one to be better on his own but not here in a strange land and under threat.

[end of thread]

[ultra-violences]

François Arnaud

[flreclouds]

astoria had not expected to bring someone else into her home, but the very clearly terrified red-haired faerie from summer who had been very adamant that she tell no one she’d been there… she’d asked, and then introduced astoria to @remyalaire. and astoria had understood. most places in general weren’t built for illyrians. she'S sure the females have a hard enough time, and the males were much taller. it makes her wonder how much of prythian outside of illyria is designed with illyrians in mind… she’s unsure what similarities other than wings and flight the illyrians and seraphim might have, but at the very least, her home is designed with wings and height in mind. some counters might still not be tall enough, but at the very least, her ceilings and doors are, and the low-backed chairs and larger bed are designed to accommodate wings. and while she’d never actually intended to house others, she’d kept a spare bedroom, mostly in case lia ever decided to visit, since she hadn’t exactly had other friends, and tia and her “sleepovers” were usually at the palace.  “here,” she hands him a key attached to a crow keychain, “you can put it on a different keychain or something, i just thought it would be easier if it was attached to something. oh, also, the crows will be nice so long as you’re nice to them. karasu is the one who watches over them, and if you find one inside, it’s hannelore or leto. they like berries and unsalted peanuts, if you want to feed them. they’re better company than most faeries.” she steps further into her cottage, the entrance an open space leading into the living room. she gestures towards the archway that leads to the kitchen, “the kitchen is through here, feel free to use anything in it, including food.” she doesn’t know if the spices or other things she’d have are the same as what he’d find at home, but she doesn’t have anything that she’d be upset about sharing. she’s maybe a little a lot nervous, since she is rambling. but she does want him to be comfortable and she doesn’t want him to worry about whether it’s okay to use anything. “the bedrooms are upstairs. yours is on the right. there's an armoire and attached bathroom. if you need anything else, you can just let me know and i'll do what i can to get ahold of things.”

[remyalaire]

He almost said no to this.

Staying at a complete stranger's house in a court he barely knew wasn't something Remy would have done on his own, ever. But Florencia insisted on helping him and honestly, it felt bad to turn her down. He was so used to being uncomfortable his whole life that it didn't even seem like something he needed to fix. It was such a good change, though. Remy was forever thankful to his friend because the Seraphim's home was rather beautiful and big and he didn't feel trapped anymore.

"I'll keep this if that's alright with you. Unless you want the key chain back? That's alright as well. I'll put the keys on a string." Remy listen with attention at the explanations about the crows. He liked animals. His horse back home was probably his best friend. "Most animals are." He agreed.

The kitchen was what interested him the most so at that he asked, "Do have an oven? Could I perhaps bake some bread for us? I'd like to do that." He offered. "I can keep the house tidy and clean as well, help with the upkeep." Remy was very organized and he liked a space without chaos so he was good at keeping spaces clean.

[witchoftheshdows]

CLOSED: @remyalaire

after all the chaos that kept unfolding around them iliana was far more than grateful to have friends that they could lean on that they knew they could just...exist with. not having to be a weird, soft spoken witch that had caused a small stir within prythian after mostly everyone had lost their powers, except for the witches or cauldron made, or a daemati who no longer had that ability either. truthfully she was still trying to wrap her head around that one; the voices suddenly just stopped all together when it happened, making her wonder at first if it was just her, but then dorian had lost his own abilities, which led them all to now. she had decided to finally come back to visit astoria,dressed down to see a friend with unsalted nuts and berries in a basket with her knowing that was what the murder of crows preferred as a snack with a trinket that had reminded her of her friend when she saw it in the market, with hair neatly under a bandanna.

she makes her way through the backside of the starlight home, where she knows the murder of crows usually are, this being the first place she was shown when first given the tour, too excited to share the basket of treats with the birds that had equally become her friends alongside astoria, this not being the first time the witch goes to greet them first, and when leto and hanni perk up and squawk at the sight of her, a grin breaks out onto her face and she moves in closer to them with a coo, "hi ladies! i've missed you all! and I brought snacks, today!" she's laughing as they slowly start to surround her in anticipation and she decidedly sits herself down in the small sleeping stable of theirs, beaming at them as she goes to put some of the treat on the skirts in her lap. and holds out a few in her own hands.

it isn't long until the fae hear's the stable door that leads to the house jingle a bit, perking up as they expect to find their friend astoria like usual as the crows help themselves, a few curiously making their way to the fruit in their lap, leto on their shoulder as she nuzzle into the witch's hair and hanni helps herself to the food they have cupped into their hands. some crows even taking a peek at the fruit and nuts still in the basket and lia can't help but giggle at how they must look once the door opens fully. "hiii! I hope you don't mind, I couldn't help my--" the excuse, made with a bright and breathy tone and slight giggles in between stops in her throat once she finally comes face to face with a much taller figure and a completely different set of wings...a face that embarrassingly kept creeping back into her head since their first meeting and this throws her completely off guard as she flushes a bit at just the sight of him, now fumbling at her words as the crows go about their business, happily pecking away without a care in the world. "I...oh, um..h-hello uh...sorry, I thought you were--wait i'm sorry, I didn't realize you knew...i'm...i'm not interrupting a current visit, am I?" she sits up a little, brushing some of the hay off when she notices what looks to be an apron that's just a bit small on him, head tilting to the side a bit as she notices, and leto, as if sensing the surprise caws again, as if asking lia if she was alright, curiously hopping back onto her lap and she lightly strokes the crow's feathers, grateful for something to do in the moment as she tries to piece this all together, brows now lightly furrowed in confusion "...i-i should have checked with her first to see if it was alright to stop by."

[remyalaire]

Remy wasn't anywhere near Sterallia when everything went down but whispers blow with the wind and what came to his ears wasn't something he was expecting to hear. Something bad happened at the castle, something terrifying. The Illyrian didn't even know what to make of it when Astoria told him about it. Astoria who was now hosting him graciously at her cottage that better suited his wings and frame.

It didn't take long for Remy to feel a little better in a place where he didn't have to make himself small to fit or fear that the furniture would give in under him. He could stretch his wings and even do something useful like bake in Astoria's fully equipped kitchen. And it was quiet there, so quiet. Even though Remy was still terrified and longing of home, he felt useful here. Keeping the house clean and the crows fed, making friends with them (Leto seemed very fond of him eventually even though his wings scared them a little at first)

Ever since meeting Lia back at the inn when they all first arrived in Starlight, the witch kept popping into his mind. Her warmth, her kindness. He wondered how she was doing through all of this. He decided to go see her to check on her and since the first time she came to see him, she had an offering, he figured he could do the same. Remy found an apron that belonged to Astoria that was a little small on him and set out to bake some bread for his new friend. Or hopefully his new friend? When the loaf was in the oven and he was washing the utensils he had used, he heard some commotion next door with the crows and thought that perhaps Astoria was back. Remy dried his hands and came out to check when, coincidentally, on the other side of the door, like a vision surrounded by the dark birds, was Iliana.

He tilts his head at her reaction, finding it different to the first time they saw each other when she was all bubbly and confident and he wonders if it's him who's making her uncomfortable. "Astoria is at Sterallia at the moment but you are more than welcome to wait for her here. I won't bother you, I apologize." He says quickly and vows his head a little. "Um— but if you don't mind me saying, it just so happens that I was thinking about you just now." Remy nods, looking away. "I'm baking bread. I was baking bread for you. To take to you." Is he even making sense? Hopefully.

[flreclouds]

florencia slips through the gate to astoria’s cottage, glancing at the crows that are sitting on the trees and fence around the property. “hello, i read that crows are very protective of their home and their faeries, and that you like berries, so i brought some for you,” she offers a container of berries that she sets on the ground near the path to the door after opening it for them, before she continues her way to the front door and knocks, silently hoping that @remyalaire opens the door and not astoria. because even though she welcomed remy, she isn’t sure she’ll feel as welcoming towards florencia, when she comes from one of the courts that didn’t want to work with starlight. and either way, she's still scary. florencia smiles and reaches out to pull remy into a hug when she sees him. “are you alright?” she asks, arms tightening around him, just in case he feels negatively towards her at all and this is the last time for a while that she gets to see him, even though logically she knows he wouldn’t. “i know the whole, lack of powers must be rough. and then this new… whatever they are… sound scary.”

[remyalaire]

Accepting other's help wasn't something Remy found easy. In fact, when Florencia suggested asking the Starlight Court's Seraphine for advice, he almost said no but now he was glad that he didn't. Astoria's cottage was a little like his own back in Spring with high ceilings, big doors and spacious rooms. The tightness in his chest, the feeling of being trapped was gone and even though things got increasingly worst since they arrived in Starlight, staying at Astoria's made it all a little bit easier.

He froze for a moment when Florencia pulled him into a hug, hesitating. It wasn't the first time they hugged but physical contact was still something Remy was learning to accept. He knew he felt good during and after a hug but the camp's conditioning still made him doubt that he even deserved it. Remy hugged her tiny frame, delicately. One of his big hands stroking up and down her back softly. "Better now that you are here." He stayed in the hug a moment too long before he finally separated. Wings contracting against his back to make way for her to come into the house. "Please." Remy invited her in. "Astoria is in Sterallia. Make yourself at home." He guided her to the sitting room. "I'm— overwhelmed, scared." he said, honestly.