retromusician

kill me (she/her)

[retromusician]

i am in love with trans drag queens 🤍💙💖

[retromusician]

blame it on the little italian man who lives inside me

[retromusician]

if jesus is the king of kings, then rupaul is jesus's wife (queen of queens)

[retromusician]

happy birthday to me & joe biden

[retromusician]

browsing r/dph for the first time is almost as scary as taking 40 benadryls

[retromusician]

yes, i would like 7.5 billion dollars of f1 authentics, how did you know ?

[retromusician]

i'm eating Nutella out of the jar while watching rip vine complications and f1 funnies and cuddling a stuffed animal. guess what kind of day i'm having.

[retromusician]

my sim's son had a play date, he brought his friend inside to warm up by the fireplace. the neighbor came to the door, my sim makes polite conversation, then my child's playdate catches on fire, and my sim refused to call the fire department because the couch is in the way. the only reason that the fire was extinguished was because the sprinkler system finally turned on. then my sim promptly took a nap on the couch that prevented my sim from calling the fire department

[retromusician]

[retromusician]

the internet goes out for one (1) day, and when i come back hideo kojima has killed shinzo abe

[retromusician]

my favourite part of video games is when you're in the middle of a mission and the janky ass physics gets you stuck in a wall while getting the shit beaten out of you by a level 2 enemy because you can't move

[retromusician]

so i'm playing assassin's creed: origins, and my character gets stuck on a wall (bc ubisoft) and i'm trying to find a way to reset my character, and i start clicking some alt+function keys. and my dumbass presses alt+f4. i trolled myself. like problem solved BUT NOT THE WAY I WANTED

[retromusician]

==OBI-WAN KENOBI EP. VI SPOILERS==

the obi-wan finale literally made me cry like a bitch iykyk

[retromusician]

morbius shitposts are the only thing keeping me alive rn

[retromusician]

you're not from Ontario unless you've cut off the corner of your bag of milk with a serrated knife bc you couldn't find the kitchen scissors

[retromusician]

sumthn abt scratching ur junk after a long day just hits different

[retromusician]

sweaty in the sun

roasting like a potato

trapped in the hot car