So our ship was one sided? Once?
I think so. I strongly feel that during The Force Awakens Kylo was at least deeply fascinated or infatuated with Rey.
He bridal carries her rather than flinging her over his shoulder or passing her to a stormtrooper, which tactically, on a battlefield like the one they’re on makes much more sense. He’s leaving himself wide open to attacks, yet for some reason, he just has to carry her that way. Bridal carries in on themselves carry lots of romantic connotations - not too say that scenes outright romantic. It’s also a very tender way to carry someone.
He’s also interested in her for something other than the map, as the book suggests. He notices something about her, which we can assume now is most likely he being his equal in the Light.
“Something.” He sounded mystified. “There is something…Who are you?” - Kylo Ren.
During the interrogation scene, he acts very oddly. She’s a prisoner that has the key to finding Luke Skywalker, the last Jedi, the man he despises, the uncle and Master who betrayed him and tried to kill him. And yet, rather than taking the information straight away he’s so interested in learning more about The Girl that he’s heard so much about - barely anything really - that he doesn’t do that. Compare Rey’s interrogation to Poe’s which was vicious, straight to the point and effective. Yet Kylo is far more gentle with Rey. He takes off his mask so she doesn’t see him as a creature in a mask. Taking off the mask made him more human, took away a very useful means of intimidation and put him at risk of showing his vulnerability. In the book, he shows reluctance to hurt her, reminding her that he can take whatever he wants, that there’s no use not telling him about the droid as he’ll get the information he needs. He tries to take away a lot of discomfort to her.
When she maintained her silence, he [Kylo] almost sighed. “I can take whatever I want.”
Her [Rey] muscles tightened. “Then you don’t need me to tell you anything.”
“True.” He rose, resigned. “I would have preferred to avoid this. Despite what you may believe, it gives me no pleasure. I will go as easily as possible—but I will take what I need.” - The Force Awakens Novelisation.
Snoke in the books straight up calls him out on his feelings for her.
You have compassion for her.” - Snoke in The Force Awakens Novelisation.
He feels she’s worthy of his attention.
Hux was not worthy of such attention.
The girl, on the other hand… - Kylo in The Force Awakens Novelisation.
Look at the way he looks at her here! This is the girl who resisted him, who helped the traitor Finn and BB-8 escape his grasp, and earned him the displeasure of his Master. The girl who fired at him, insults him at every turn and who fought him on the snow. She’s an enemy of The Order. And yet despite all this, he offers her to be his teacher, to show her the ways of The Force. Which would mean spending lots of time with her and getting to know her. You don’t offer that to someone you don’t have some sort of feelings for.
Then there’s how he acts at the beginning of The Last Jedi before Rey begins to soften up to him. The Girl who slashed his face and left him for dead in the snow and his first reaction at seeing her in the force bond isn’t anger, it’s fascinating. He’s so curious about The Force bond and figuring out why they’re connected. He’s very calm around her, even after everything she’s done to him. Remember this is Kylo Ren, infamous for his temper tantrums and who smashes up equipment over little things and yet, he’s so calm and curious around Rey. He was smitten for her since TFA and at the start of TLJ, I think, whether he realised it or not.
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