Ben was shaken, completely unsettled by the fact that she could hear his voice. His lips pressed together and then parted once more. Seeing her experience such anguish wasn’t something he’d ever wanted. He just wanted to comfort her, to let her know that even if she isolated herself and hid her feelings from those she loved that she still wasn’t alone. How could he say nothing? How could he just bear witness to something as heartbreaking as a girl full of light sinking into sand, tears pouring down hot cheeks? Watching as she looked around, he breathed out, feeling useless. He leaned back on his knees, watching her above him. He didn’t say anything for a moment, wondering if he’d made the wrong decision in saying more.
There was no taking it back. He’d spoken, he couldn’t stop speaking, as selfish as it felt to respond when this was the last thing she needed. “I am. I think… I don’t know.” Ben wanted to comfort her, not leave her reeling with a million questions. Lifting himself from the sand, he pursed his lips, his expression becoming one of regret. “I don’t know how. To show myself, I mean. I don’t know if it’s possible. Maybe this is all more complicated than I thought.” He clenched his fists at his side, stepping close to her but knowing that even if he reached out, she wouldn’t feel him.
“I can see you.” He answered quietly, already second guessing his instinct to tell her the truth, always. This truth was painful, he shouldn’t have been burdening her with it. “I can just see you, your surroundings. I’m… I don’t know what I am, but it doesn’t matter.” Ben replied firmly. He had to stop this, before she held on to hope that she shouldn’t, before she got ahead of herself in thinking that he wasn’t still gone. He was sure he was, even if it wasn’t in a way he understood. “I didn’t know that you could hear me, I’ve just… been watching. I’m here with you, but I know you can’t see me.”
There was a brief moment of silence, and Rey shuddered to herself, convinced that this was just a very vivid, cruel hallucination. Perhaps it was the heat; she’d been away from the desert for so long now that being back was an adjustment, as strange as the thought was. Wiping the sweat from her forehead, she was nearly about to shake her head and dismiss the entire thing - until she heard his voice again.
She’d had visions of him before, but never like this. They were quite often in her dreams rather than when she was awake, but never had his voice been so clear, never had she been able to grasp onto the sound of it for longer than a few seconds at a time. This was...something else. It had to be. Rey glanced around desperately for the third time, hoping, if anything, that she’d see his force ghost waiting there for her. As painful as it would be to see him like that, it might have been even more painful to hear him without seeing him at all.
He didn’t...know how to show himself...he was there, but...invisible? This was all so confusing to her, as although she’d studied a few different force theories, nothing had quite explained this. But the more he spoke, the more desperate she became, gasping at the sound of the voice that she’d missed so terribly. How dare the force taunt her like this, to only give her part of him, to not let her see him. But he could see her - Rey inhaled sharply at this spectacle, listening further as he went on. Ben had been there. For how long, she wasn’t sure, but he’d been watching her for at least some time. He had just now chosen to speak.
“You mean - “ Rey struggled to find the words, tears still brimming her eyes as she tried to decide what to focus her eyes on, finally deciding on the sand beneath her feet. “Y-You’ve been watching me...never saying anything...f-for how long?” It broke her heart all over again that this was suddenly their new reality, but at the same time, knowing that he was somehow still there - where, she wasn’t sure, but present - it gave her hope. In fact, it didn’t take long for her tears to dry as she stiffened, crossing her arms firmly over her chest. “You’re not dead, Ben! You’re alive, somehow, somewhere, a-and we...there has to be a way to get you back!” Her determination was quickly returning, and she began sprinting back towards the Falcon without a second thought, assuming that he’d still be with her wherever she went. “I’ve got to research this, as soon as possible!”
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