of mushrooms and towers

What do you want, outlander? I - er - mean hail, traveler. Do you need anything? If not, you're just wasting your time. And more importantly, mine. (Skyrim rp blog following a telvanni magelord. Crossovers are accepted, and feel free to send an ask or something. I don't bite. c:)

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

That business on your face -- is that makeup or a tattoo?

It's a tattoo, but why is this any of your business?

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

“I could kill you. It’d make me happy.”

[weejathemage]

“You could try to to kill me.” she smirked. “I can promise you it won’t be as easy as you think.”

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

"I think i'd be a lot easier than you think." He chuckled. 

[wandererfromthenorth]

rhysthemiserable started following you

[wandererfromthenorth]

The Nord smiled, pleased to hear that she didn’t appear to be some helpless milkdrinker out wandering the world.

Halldis cringed, “And I thought the Thieves Guild was bad. But they sound downright friendly compared to that lot.”

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

"They're not the most pleasant lot. Especially since those Hlaalu idiots were using them the most." He shuddered at the memory. 

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

The Hangover

[kii-nam]

As predicted the atronach didn’t last longer than two minutes catching the Argonian but surprise and hardly doing any damage except perhaps making him feel bad. How the creature went would be disturbing were it a living mortal body considering the ethereal blades made their appearance again embedding into a tree nearby Rhys. 

He heard a voice cursing about restoration. He headed for the source of the noise. His sword ready to wound but not to kill…not yet at least. He stepped around a tree where he thought he heard the movement from. 

“Huh…” he said before his eyes widened, hearing the sparks being called forth by the Dunmer. This was going to hurt like a sonuvabitch. He did what he could ready to take the pain…and with his other hand preparing to dish it out with a fireball in hand. 

this was going to be messy, and he hated lightning spells.

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

Rhys continue launched the lightning in the general direction of the Argonian. 'General direction' because the sparks were so plentiful they blocked everything else from his vision. He hoped the filthy animal in some way.

Due to his hangover, he wasn't quite as balanced as normal, and tripped over nothing. This was clearly not his day. A rogue spark hit him on the shoulder and he groaned, quickly jumping back up to his feet and summoning a ball of ice to fling at the Argonian.

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

O Prospero

(O Prospero: I will write about my character teaching yours something.)

Rhys jumped slightly as the Argonian slowly came into view. All he wanted was one peaceful day. The three hated him so much. As Kii came closer, Rhys summoned a ball of sparks to which he’d learned the Argonian hated. They’d both managed to survive the initial encounter they had, and ever since then, whenever they’d run into each other, they’d “lightly” have it out. 

They ran into each other much more than Rhys would’ve liked.

With an exaggerated sigh, Rhys stood up to face the Argonian, who had already pulled a dagger out of his sheath, and was looking rather menacing.

“Miss me?” Kii-Nam asked with a twisted smile on his face.

“Aren’t you the one who came to me?” The Dunmer scowled before launching the lightning at him.

The Argonian dodged the lightning and shot a fireball at Rhys that seemed to come out of no where. They said no words as they dueled, which had become a standard, weekly ritual. Rhys kept missing. He decided to quit that and draw his rival in. He put up a weak fight and within a few moments, Kii had his dagger on the Dunmer’s neck.

“Looks like I win.” The Argonian chuckled, unaware to what would happen next. Rhys used their close proximity to touch the scaly elbow and leak a calming spell into him.

“And that, my friend, is how you successfully bait an enemy.”

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

Send a prompt, get a drabble~

O Hero: I will write about my character mourning yours.

O Macbeth: I will write about how my character kills yours.

O Romeo: I will write my character missing/looking for yours.

O Juliet: I will write about my character’s feelings about yours.

O Puck: I will write about my character pranking yours.

O Titania: I will write about our characters sharing a night in bed or sharing a kiss.

O Oberon: I’ll write about my character getting angry at yours over something they did.

O Ophelia: I will write about your character driving mine insane.

O Hamlet: I will write about my character accusing yours of something.

O Brutus: I will write about my character betraying yours, or vice versa.

O Richard: I will write about my character plotting against yours.

O Prospero: I will write about my character teaching yours something.

O Portia: I will write about my character defending yours.

O Cressida: I will write about my character leaving/breaking a promise to yours.

O Iago: I will write about my character lying to yours.

[wandererfromthenorth]

rhysthemiserable started following you

[wandererfromthenorth]

“That they do,” she agreed as she took a bite of apple, “It takes a bit more than a threat and the wave of an iron dagger to frighten me out of my belongings.”

“They’re just a bit inconvenient,” she shrugged. 

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

"You do seem like the type who'd be able to take care of herself." He noted. "Back in Morrowind, before the fall, the only thieves that existed were the Camonna Tong, any rivals were quickly taken out.

"Which was good and bad. Good because if you paid up, you were fine. Bad because if not, they'd kill you." He grimaced.

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

The Hangover

[kii-nam]

Kii-Nam eyes widened for a moment seeing the fireball before grinning like maniac as it went toward him. One thing that Rhys didn’t know about his mage skill was that fire was favorite tool of destruction…

The explosion needless to say was a lot bigger than it should be, and the flames became a mix of red and orange with blue from another source. 

Though to anyone’s surprise or not, Kii-Nam was still there, though his hand was blackened and not damaged and the rest of his clothing was charred and falling off in some places. He let out a cough, “Well…serves me right for trying this shit with a hangover…*cough cough cough*…” he looked up seeing that Rhys had taken cover somewhere. “Huh odd.”

The Argonian pulled out his silver sword and in the other hand had a blue flame ready to unleash whatever hell he could muster before walking toward into the more heavily wooded area. Gods he wish he could remember that anti-hangover spell that one of his kinsmen taught him, a bit hard to considering the situation.

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

Rhys cursed and quickly went through his pack, hoping the tree would provide enough cover. He quickly fingered through his stack of papers before pulling out the correct scroll and using it to summon a fire atronach. 

The atronach wouldn't last for very long, but he hoped it'd hold his enemy off for long enough for him to bandage up the wound. He'd underestimated the stranger, but it wasn't his fault. Who'd ever heard of one of those slimeballs being intelligent enough to cast a spell?

He found a long, thin piece of fabric he could use for it. He quickly applied a weak healing spell to his arm and wrapped the fabric around it. "If i'll be damned I should've studied restoration better."

Now healed and with a sinister grin he stood back up and summoned sparks yet again before stepping out from behind his tree. He'd give the Argonian a storm like he'd never seen before.

[a-masked-smile-blog]

rhysthemiserable started following

“Hello there.” Giving a gruff nod to the other elf. “What brings you out to the middle of nowhere..”

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

"Hail, serjo." Rhys gave a polite smile. "I've got people to kill, argonians to poison. You know, normal everyday stuff."

[wandererfromthenorth]

rhysthemiserable started following you

[wandererfromthenorth]

She chuckled, “No I suppose they aren’t. But out on the road they’re a bit more bold since there aren’t any guards around. They’ll just walk right up to you and demand that you hand over your valuables. It can be quite annoying.”

Halldis smiled and gave a polite nod as she accepted the bit of apple, “Thank you.”

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

"True, although usually they overestimate how strong they are." He coughed and took a bite out of his half before shaking his head. "Ah, it's nothing. I don't need to eat much."

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

The Hangover

[kii-nam]

“No those are my robes, because I wear green” actually it was a cloak and hood, but both having been so hammered last night no one could know at that moment. Though at the death threat again Kii-Nam let out an aggrevated huff of air before throwing up a ward for his protection. “Not until I fill the gap of what the hell happened last night, for all we know we got drugged by some wizard and we had intercourse. In which I’d kill myself.”

“Now shut up with the threats before I pin you to a tree!” he roared his headache throbbing now to the point where it was somewhat unbearable, and using his magic was just as a pain despite summoning 3 blades of arcane aura around him before they turned aiming at the Dunmer. 

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

“Are you colorblind AND stupid, or is your hangover so bad that you can’t see clearly. I would /never/ wear anything from an Argonian, even drunk.” Rhys rolled his eyes before switching into outrage. “How dare you even SUGGEST that I would ever have intercourse with a fish! What kind of dunmer do you think I am?”

Rhys shot the lightning straight at the Argonian in a fit of rage. “You deserve to die for even merely thinking that could’ve happened. Fool.”

[kii-nam]

“Well you are now jackass!” he shouted in anger before hearing that. “I am not a fish you subpar piece of shit!” he bellowed keeping the ward up allowing the lighting to strike it. He smirked and laughed before the 3 swords he had the mind to conjured lashed forward at Rhys. “Then you can burn with Gothren!” 

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

Rhys chuckled and cockily warded two of the ethereal blades, the last on grazing his shoulder. "You're just a fish out of water, you filthy thing!" Rhys summoned a ball of fire and launched it at him before diving behind a nearby tree.

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

The Hangover

[kii-nam]

“No those are my robes, because I wear green” actually it was a cloak and hood, but both having been so hammered last night no one could know at that moment. Though at the death threat again Kii-Nam let out an aggrevated huff of air before throwing up a ward for his protection. “Not until I fill the gap of what the hell happened last night, for all we know we got drugged by some wizard and we had intercourse. In which I’d kill myself.”

“Now shut up with the threats before I pin you to a tree!” he roared his headache throbbing now to the point where it was somewhat unbearable, and using his magic was just as a pain despite summoning 3 blades of arcane aura around him before they turned aiming at the Dunmer. 

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

"Are you colorblind AND stupid, or is your hangover so bad that you can't see clearly. I would /never/ wear anything from an Argonian, even drunk." Rhys rolled his eyes before switching into outrage. "How dare you even SUGGEST that I would ever have intercourse with a fish! What kind of dunmer do you think I am?"

Rhys shot the lightning straight at the Argonian in a fit of rage. "You deserve to die for even merely thinking that could've happened. Fool."

[skyrimconfessionss]

“I would love to see the Dragonborn lead a joint Imperial-Stormcloak attack on the Aldmeri Dominion, aided by the Dragonborn’s various allies. Imagine swooping into battle on a dragon, the Imperial/Stormcloak army bolstered by the Blades and Companions! Cast down magefire with the College of Winterhold! Assassinate Thalmor generals with the Dark Brotherhood! Turn the Aldmeri troops from within with the Vampires! Champion of Daedric Princes? Fight alongside the hordes of Mehrunes Dagon, steal ancient Aldmeri knowledge with Hermaeus Mora’s eldritch horrors, eat the flesh of Thalmor troops with Namira and subjugate the Dominion with Molag Bal!”

image credit [x]

http://skyrimconfessions.com/

[tamrieltrinity]

((…Because it wouldn’t work?

The Imperial Legion (even at full power) would not attack the AD and certainly wouldn’t follow no damn orders from a mere soldier. The Blades would fight the Dominion but would reject you for riding the dragon. 

The Companions and the College of Winterhold don’t get involved in politics.

The Dark Brotherhood works for Sithis - this means that should one of the AD folks do the Black Sacrament to malky off your generals, you’re bound to follow orders.

Whilst vampires could potentially be utilised, isn’t that just…giving them an advantage?

Dagon, Hermaeus Mora, Namira and Molag Bal don’t have to help you or do anything for you (at least without sacrificing something) and to get them all to work together for you? Vivec managed it, oh yes…after years of debate in Oblivion and even then, it failed.))

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

The Hangover

[kii-nam]

“Then what would you rather have me call you? Asshole?” he asked him if a bit offended. “I can’t think straight either, otherwise well….this” he displayed his own show of force sending a firebolt past Rhys’ head. “Now then…since we both know one thing….we were drinking, or one of us drugged the other. So what did you want from me? Huh?”

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

“I would never drink with a filthy argonian like you. Don’t ever even suggest it. You probably drugged me to steal my valuables. Stealing is what you dirty things do best.”

Rhys patted himself down to make sure everything was still there. “Well, it seems you failed, as nothing is missing from my robes. I’m feeling merciful because I have one splitting headache that came straight from oblivion. So i’m going to take my leave.

You ought to not be here for too long, because i’m sending the guards after you, thief, as soon as I get to town. You might be able to outrun them if you go now.”

[kii-nam]

“I can’t steal worth a damn, besides unless you want to do a pat down on me, so be it Rhysssss” he did the stupid reptilian “sss” emphasis in which he never understood why people imagined them doing that so much when Argonians could speak normally.

Kii-Nam looked around and off to the side and pointed, “Um, found your robes” he told him seeing the Dunmer’s robes were on the ground disheveled. 

“And now I’m not running until I KNOW what you did to me” he hissed slightly. He was starting to lose his patience despite the hangover he was suffering, the idea of sending a flashbang spell at him sounded like a damned good idea.

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

"I'm wearing my robes, you fool." Rhys snarled, summoning the lightning again. "Now, I am going to leave, because I don't feel like dealing with you anymore. If you want to continue to harass me, i'll use this on you. I'd have no guilt from killing one of you."

Rhys looked around at the woods. He wondered which hold he was in. "Now, Kii-Nam, if I were you i'd return to the swamp in which you came, otherwise you'll pay the price."

[ahcrapitsnate-deactivated201308]

Send my muse a dream, whether it be a nightmare, a wet dream, a trippy dream, or whatever else and I'll write my muses reaction waking up after that dream.

[weejathemage]

“Really? The way I understood it, we controlled some of your land to the south, and the rest had been rendered completely uninhabitable…”

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

“I’d dare say that what your disgusting reptile relatives control is more that half our land. You’re really starting to aggravate me, slimeball.”

[weejathemage]

“And what are you going to do about it?” she scoffed.

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

"I could kill you. It'd make me happy."

[rhysthemiserable-blog]

Headcanon on 'the Miserable'.

Rhys gained the title 'the Miserable' from his Telvanni peers as sarcasm. Unlike most Telvanni, he enjoyed the company of others (as long as they were /also/ Telvanni, as at the time he was a racist prick to all non dunmer).

It spawned from his friend Kael, who made the joking remark that he was always so miserable. Kael started calling him 'Rhys the Miserable' and eventually it got around to the rest of his House.

He hated it at first, but it stuck.