Ribbons & Geekery

Its a blog about something, I just haven't decided what yet.

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If you don't think Punk or Feminism are for you then you need to check out 'Pussy Riot: A Punk Prayer'. 

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Remember when Nu-Rave was a thing? CSS were the only good act to come out of it, mainly because they didn't seem incongruous with other attititudey female fronted dance acts like Peaches and Le Tigre, so they had meaning beyond that silly nu-rave label.

My friend Johnny & I went to see them in 2007 and Crystal Castles supported. My head hurt so much that I gave up on everything for a while there.

Eight years later I woke up with Meeting Paris Hilton in my head, which makes a change from my usual screaming, crying or moaning from frustrating anxiety dreams. Looks like everything coming up Millhouse. 

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Well this is going to be the opener for all dj sets forevermore.

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Who loves Costume Quest? I assume everyone does because it couldn't possibly only be my favourite game of all time. And since we all love Costume Quest SO DAMN MUCH, I of course presume that I don't need to explain what Creepy Treat Cards are.

Furthermore, as we're all table top gamers as well as video gamers we are surely all united in rapture from the news that Double Fine have created Creepy Treat Cards as collectible merchandise that can also be played as a game with a similar mechanic to Magic the Gathering!

The Creepy Treat Cards are $6 per pack, with a recommendation of 4 packs for a good deck. That seems a little expensive, especially when you factor in international shipping and the fact that none of your friends will have a deck or want to play with you, because dammit Shahnaz, no-one knows what Costume Quest is.

You can watch a demo of the game below with Matt Franklin (Programmer) and Amarisse Sullivan (Office Administrator and True Beauty). 

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Can you all seethe with jealousy at how amazing these images are, so I don't have to waste anymore emotional energy doing it?

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This 2008 documentary about 90s Punk Rock is doing the rounds on Facebook today and obviously I'm smitten.

I suck at reviews, but my main findings are as follows:

This serves as the perfect prequel to Punks Not Dead which pushed all the right nostalgia buttons, but problematically burns the early 00s pop punk bands as being being naive watered down copycats rather than inspired youths.

For once Tom Delonge doesn't appear to need kicking in the balls.

Goodbye forever Tony Sly.

Joey Cape is so beautiful its unfair.

Will Tim Armstrong ever get elocution lessons?

Maybe Dexter Holland isn't so bad after all.

Where all the WIMMIN at? Seriously they talk about L7 endlessly but they're nowhere to be seen? And Operation Ivy are in it but they don't even namecheck Dance Hall Crashers? Go to hell straight white boys - who produce music I adore.

And finally, Greg Graffin is the most insightful man alive IDST. There is not a word that comes out of his Dumbledore-esque mouth that doesn't make me nod sagely and hold a hand over my heart. For instance "I call it the democratisation of punk, when punk left the urban centre and you could find it in malls throughout America and the World". While I'm sure Greg is talking about albums in record stores, it made me rethink my hatred of places like Urban Outfitters which I despise for co-opting a culture that misfits and outcasts are led to through piecemeal discoveries which lead them to the scene like breadcrumbs. But maybe I'm wrong, maybe thats the cynical, elitist in me that wants to keep punk to myself in spite of every ideal i hold wanting to spread punk to all. Thats right, Greg Graffin made me rethink my entire hatred of Urban Outfitters based on one vox pop. But despite rethinking it, I still hate it, I mean Minor Threat T-Shirts, WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK? But of course everyone deserves to find out about Minor Threat somehow, and maybe that is by seeing their t-shirt in Urban Outfitters?

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Top Somethings of Somewhen

Everyone likes to review their lives at this time of year, and thats fine. The only reason I didn't think about reviewing my life at first is because its so fucking fabulous, and I'm so modest that I just don't want to put you all to shame. But because New Years Eve is a hollow sham, I am writing some top things. They are as follow:

Top gigs of 2014

Saves the Day at Dukes, London 12th April 2014 followed by Saves the Day at The Peel, Kingston 13th April 2014. It was a three hour set until 3am on the 12th, then a small, undersold show where I had enough space to flail around like a ribbon in the wind on the 13th. Plus did I mention I love them forever? Plus did I mention I requested Jessie and My Whetstone and they played it and I cried? I did a lot of crying this year.

The Menzingers at the Old Blue Last, London 30th April 2014. I was at the front for the whole show, Greg asked me to keep an eye on his drink (ah Greg!) and everyone sang along. The only downside to this show was the shit for brains vice photographer who stole Gregs drink (The one thing he asked me to fucking look after - no wonder we'll never be friends) and crowd surfed with his camera which hit everyone in the head.

New Found Glory at The Forum, London 28th November 2014. They were great, Hayley Williams sang My Friends Over You with them. I screamed hard. It ruled hard.

I only picked a top three. This says more about my enjoyment of shows this year than the amount that I attended - not that I'm bragging. Maybe I'm not cool anymore, but I think I'm too critical of audiences now I'm old and over think everything.

Top songs of 2014

The Hotelier - Your Deep Rest - The best emo track from the best emo album this year. You can't listen to this song without crying, which is great when you love crying as much as I seem to.

Cayetana - Madame B - The whole Nervous Like Me album makes me want to cry without really understanding why. But this song especially seems like a watery eyed call to arms.

Taylor Swift - Shake It Off - I hear a lot of people hate this song because it's massively overplayed. But I don't listen to the radio so I wouldn't know, HA! Therefore I'm allowed to say its one of the best songs this year with no fear of reprisal.

Charla Fantasma - JEZ - Or at least I think its called JEZ, I can't find a recording, but they've played it live every-time I've seen them and its the best catchy sing a long pop punk song EVER (this year).

Petrol Girls - Restless - This song is about orgasms and destroying parliament. Its angry, shouty, seductive hardcore and I LOVE it and you're an idiot if you don't too.

Top Bullshit in 2014

I guess I didn't like buying a house that much, never go through that if you don't have to.

Smiling whilst holding back the tears of increasingly horrendous social anxiety.

Crying when I met Laura Jane Grace on 2nd March, and not being able to think of anything to say other than that I was horrendously depressed and her music helped me. I'm sorry Laura. Seriously. You didn't need that.

Respecting someones boundaries like a vampire lifeguard trying not to jump into swimming pool of beautiful athletes with strong heart beats, only to find the athletes are all already vampires anyway.

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Lady Gaga & The Muppets Holiday Spectacular

Honestly, just seeing Kermit the Frog on a screen is enough to get me welling up. I love that dude and his whole goddamn crew, he's my motherfucking Aslan, he fills me with the warmest fuzziest feelings. Lady Gaga however has never really ignited many feelings in me, other than wanting to sing and dance to catchy songs - oh and dress & make myself up however I want, but I endeavour to be that kind of girl anyway.

Imagine my joy however, when I discovered that last year Gaga & The Muppets teamed up for a Christmas tv special!

The 50 minutes of pop joy and Muppet love feature SO MANY strong looks from Gaga that I almost passed out with the excitement of that alone. But I remained strong, even when celeb after amazing celeb cropped up onscreen (Veronica Mars, Tommy from Third Rock From The Sun AND RUPAUL!!) and even when Gaga kept singing amazing songs, usually accompanied by the greatest characters on earth (I'm talking about The Muppets you guys, come on, stay sharp) I still managed to stay alive.

As a person who finds the whole Christmas season horribly difficult, this made me super happy, and I'm planning on watching it again today. RECOMMENDED.

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Is This Band Emo?

My first thoughts upon seeing this site were "Finally, technology does something for me". I was willing to leave it there, because as long as The Get Up Kids (much against their wishes) & Saves the Day still count as emo then everything in my life is fine... Also what fun I had playing with it!  It wasn't until I investigated further that I uncovered the dystopian reality. Due to being contributed to by judgemental musos, it transpires, 'Is this band emo?' does not consider emos third wave emo. That means despite what you may have heard or thought, My Chemical Romance and Fallout boy must now relinquish their claim to the genre. I'll admit the third wave was not for me, especially not when it was most popular. When Panic at the Disco and Taking Back Sunday were mentioned, I would cringe and react horribly. But the shared opinion of mid-30s hipsters who have the first Early November record on vinyl dosnt make it okay. I realise how much of a snob i was being now of course, and I will gladly revise my opinions, I mean believe it or not, I did once believe in Santa and think sex was gross. 

I guess i'm fed up with attitude i used to have, and more than that i'm fed up with the muso majority who sanctify that exclusive attitude. Those third wave bands were the first to actually site Sunny Day Real Estate, Fugazi and Split Lip as their inspiration. They were also the first badge wearing emos to sell out stadiums and make it possible for all those emo bands I love to reform and tour so I could go and see them as a wage earning adult. 

So they're more nu-metal, than pop-punk? They're more exhibitionist than lacking in self confidence? I don't give a fuck. They're fun to dance to, and if they consider themselves emo, and are inspired by emo, then I guess that makes them emo. 

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Every now and then I'll see something so cringeworthy I need to blog about it. I think Marilyn Manson performing Ava Adore with The Smashing Pumpkins is one of those things. I've re-watched several times, hoping to see the good in this, but all I see is:

Marilyn (I think its more fitting that we call him Brian now) with a smart little crew cut. I'm not into it.

Billy looking more like Fester Adams than ever.

A publicity stunt, based on a contrived 90s animosity which was frankly more transparent than Blur VS Oasis.

Despite my criticisms though, I don't hold the same contempt for Courtney exploiting the sham.

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Maybe its the tacky synth playing in the background, or maybe its Keanus hair, but this scene in Bill & Teds Excellent Adventure makes me well up every-damn-time. 

'Be good to each other & party on' might is the sentiment to end all sentiments.

That's why I made a new placeholder image for mine & Zaks disco.

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I hope Aubrey Plaza will be my best friend once she see's this unflattering drawing what I done of her.

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There Are No Fake Geek Girls

Gosh you guys, does anyone else find being a passive canvas for the projections of strangers difficult? I always fail and end up revealing that I have interests and passions, and most of the time someone - usually a guy - will have to test me to make sure I really do like the stuff I've somehow imagined I like. I understand fully, I mean how on earth can I just expect to waltz into the personality club without reciting my top 5 games for each generation of every console since the 70s? Or every lyric to every Bad Religion song perfectly, and in chronological order?

It's been a while since my geek credentials have been 'tested'. I can thank my intensifying anxiety over the last few years for protecting me. It's been quite good never going out or socialising for exactly this reason. But sometimes meeting new people is unavoidable, and at the weekend I ended up meeting several people who rather than engage me in conversation ABOUT the things I like, felt the need to quiz me to make sure I met their standards instead. I just think you should know, if you do this you are a dickhead, and to those heroes who leave the house often enough to have this happen regularly - my heart goes out to you! 

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<3 <3 <3

Daayum Sleater Kinney, why you gotta go and drop a banger on the world when I didn't manage to get a ticket for your crazy awesome world tour??

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So my bestie and I enjoyed our disco SO MUCH that we're only putting on another bloody one at The Montague in 13 days!

You should come if you enjoy:

dancing (no obvious talent required)

sugar

pop music

pop punk

emo

punk rock

having quasi-religious experiences over said musical genres

AND if you have an overwhelming sense of being unwelcome in most public spaces and casual social situations: we're here for you! Even if you're too shy to come and say hi, we're happy you'd come in the first place!

Seriously it's the only thing to look forward to this month, so come and have fun with us! ...Unless you're a judgemental muso - in which case I guess you'll be turning up your nose at all the genuine fun and joy we'll be swimming in!

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Life is too short to waste it pretending you don't like bands you actually fucking like.

When I was 14, like all 14 year old girls who were into punk, I was nuts for New Found Glory. Here are the facts of my crazy love:

I had a mad crush on Chad, but an even bigger crush on Cyrus, who looked like a boy I had a crush on in real life.

I saw them at Reading in 2001 and hated myself for not being able to get anywhere near the front, such was their boyband level of popularity at the time. Until this day that was the most violent pit I've ever been in, I saw a girl leave bleeding from her eye!

'Nothing Gold Can Stay' was the first album I ever bought that incurred me a judgemental comment from a record store dick, I wanted to tell him to 'go fuck himself', but as a self conscious teenager with zero confidence, I didn't realise that was an option.

Of course, despite having zero confidence, I was also a pretentious idiot. I decided that New Found Glory were poser-sellouts the moment they released Hit Or Miss and other people at school knew who they were. For this indiscretion I rejected them entirely, despite continuing to listen to bands who were to all intents and purposes, exactly the same, and in most cases not as good. This became my default mechanism for having to share my toys bands until I was about 25, I couldn't deal with other people staking a claim in music I HAD FEELINGS FOR.  Through my twenties I dipped in and out of love for New Found Glory, never quite capturing the same level of my teen adoration again, but this week I got tickets to see them for my birthday, and holy shit I've missed out on such a lot for 14 years, the energy they have live is astounding, Jordan's voice works so much better live than on record and Chad is intense on guitar in a way I'd never have realised as a teenager. I'll admit, New Found Glory might not be to everyones taste, but the lesson to be learned here is this: Life is too short to waste it pretending you don't like bands you actually fucking like.

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Resist Psychic Death (The Zine)

I would never normally tell anyone to buy anything, other than the things that they truly need or desire but I will tell you to buy this zine:

I picked up a copy last night at the Lipstick Homicide & The Petrol Girls show at The Montague Arms and I couldn't stop reading it on the bus this morning, I felt like every contributor had managed to distill my thoughts on this topic perfectly. I've tried writing about my experiences and frustrations about being female in at punk shows on here prior to now, but thinking about it overwhelms me and I'm unable to be concise. I know through conversations with basically anyone who will listen over the last few weeks that I am not alone in this, and I've been growing keen to raise awareness of it in a more tangible way. This zine compounded what I've been thinking in that the punk scene is not unaffected by sexism, racism, transphobia, ablism and homophobia. Just about every aspect of the world we live in exists in a microcosm in punk and while I am all for the eradication of these things from every area of society, the thing chides me about it in punk is that its a subculture that prides itself on difference and inclusion, to such an extent that any complaint of exclusion is swept under the rug. 

All Hail Resist Psychic Death, thank you for making me feel like I have a voice even when I'm too overwhelmed to make it heard myself.

PS - Now is a good time to enjoy the Zines namesake xoxo