I fly all the way to the hotel, on the bus, through the cow-riddled fields I can’t see in the dark, until I’m flying through the lobby, already all the way up in his room in my head…until the valet stops me, tells me I need to check the front desk.
It’s not my thing, but sometimes shit gets broken…I always enjoy dealing with that sort of stuff, insist they come to me personally.
“What’s broken this time?” I act the bored chaperone part to get us off, but inside I’m almost always thrilled.
“Nothing.” He looks spooked. “He just left the key. Said he needs you in his room.”
“The pool?” His eyes widen; his accent slips, revealing he’s a little American in little England.
“Thank you.” I give my sweetest smile, all poison viper.
“Hey.” He hugs me, dressed less like a rockstar in something like yoga pants, knit sweater. “What took so long?”
“Hmmm. What about the pool?”
“They should be heating it up as we speak. Why the change in scenery?”
“Come check out the balcony, it’s sick. What did you have to do to get it done?”
He scoffs. “What did you really have to do?”
“Just had to say I wanted it…didn’t even have to say it was for you.”
“I know…couldn’t argue with him though, I like being boss.”
“In all but name, not that I mind.”
He throws open the door, and wow: it is sick.
The view is all countryside, which means except for a few pinpricks of light in our vicinity, there’s nothing for miles and miles…and then there’s the tub, tucked in one corner, filling with water, about halfway.
“What took you so long?” I’m only teasing him as I test the water…it’s warm.
He doesn’t answer, so I turn to face him, to find that he’s flushed, unusually.
“Almost. Although…we can talk about that later.”
“Cool…are we inviting anybody up?”
“I thought it could be just us…I really don’t wanna deal with anyone else right now. Oh, and, uh…I had to give over both our keys so we could have this room free of charge. Do you hate me yet?”
“I could never hate you…especially not for this.”
“I was worried for about two seconds. What’s up with the tour schedule?”
“They set tonight’s show to two days from now, and I called down to the label so they can fix the dates on the rest of the tour.”
“Cool. Tell me what they change it to when it comes through?”
“Always. Now, who’s going first?”
He laughs, takes off his shirt, jumps right in…getting covered in goosebumps where he’s out of the water.
I take pity, slipping out of my shorts and going in just my shirt, reaching to hug him.
“How are you always so warm?” He wraps himself around me the rest of the way, and I don’t make him let go, though it feels strange.
“The heat’s in my blood?”
“I was born someplace warm too, and I haven’t got that.”
“Luck of the draw, baby. Maybe yours was a cold year.”
“Is that how you think it goes?”
“Could be…or maybe it’s just a matter of choice.”
“Hmm. What’s that thing around your neck?”
“Secrets come in silver now?”
It’s actually the ring, though now isn’t the time the way I thought it would be…I look up, up at the sky, and then we’re quiet, until my phone rings in my shorts.
“Could be the front desk.”
“Wanna bet on who broke what?”
“Nah…you always win. Taking me for all I’m worth.”
“I don’t need a bet to do that.”
She rolls her eyes and slips halfway off the tub, bending to reach her shorts…I’m sure she’s about to fall over, so I reach to hold her waist…her underwear’s black, watersheer…how the fuck am I gonna tell her?
“Hi?” She’s already sliding back in next to me, careless as fuck, always.
“Oh, cool. Thanks. Take the…yeah. Oh, yeah…that’d be great. There’s no need to…yeah, slide it in. Thank you.”
“Slide it in?” I cock an eyebrow.
“Dirty fucker.” But she’s distracted. “They’re bringing the keys to the pool…wasn’t sure they’d actually do it.”
“I don’t think they heat it usually, and it’s up on the roof, maybe uncovered? They probably had to wake millions just to get it ready.”
“You’re not too bad yourself.”
“Underneath everything else.”
“So…do you wanna go up now?”
“Yeah, might as well. Need to put on something else…don’t want to get a call about wet streaks in the hall.”
But she’s gone, beelining for the closet, where I left her backpack…I stare at her as long as I can before making my way out of the water, closing the tub so we don’t have to start again, get undressed.
She throws open the glass door, stripping immediately, jumping in before I can even get all the way out of my clothes.
“Come over here and do it yourself.”
I give her what she wants, jumping into the water…it is warm, thank fuck.
She swims closer to me, reaches a hand out to play with my hair, laughing at the way it looks…I do the same to hers.
“Maybe…it’s getting a little long.” She slips her fingers around the edges, brushing my neck.
“You know I’ll always say grow it long…but you should ask people again, it makes them feel like they’re part of the show.”
“I should grow it, just for you.”
Her eyes get distant, and that scares me so much, I start to slowly lose it, though I try not to show it.
“You’ll look great no matter what you do, J.”
She laughs. “Last time I grew my hair long, I almost died.”
“It hurt…but the worst of it was that it became unbrushable.”
“I’d brush it if you let me…”
Her eyes are still drifting, distant, colder than the night air…until she stops, turning to look at me, swimming closer.
She stops inches away, and then wraps her arms around my shoulders, even as I get mine around her waist…
“I got you something…it’s…fuck, it’s so cheesy, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“I’ve just said one of the cheesiest things of my life…that’s just us.”
She nods, slipping her fingers away; I hold her against me halfway, as she reaches behind her to unclasp the necklace she hadn’t been wearing earlier, taking it in her hand, before slipping something out of it.
“I know you’ve got tons of metal, so I wanted to get something different…the colors are boring, but still…”
She slips it into my hand, and I turn it over, accidentally pulling her closer, her fingers going across my back, along my neck…it’s a ring, black pink woven together, unlike anything I have.
“It’s…it’s great. Where…where did you get it?”
“Some country mall…I wove it myself. I used to have one of these a while back and because I was a hopeless useless romantic even when I didn’t want to be…I thought if I ever found someone I really liked, I’d make them one…and it couldn’t be metal, because that hurts, and it’s bad enough that you’re…that we’re doing whatever this is.”
“Right now…but it has been. And I know I’m fucked, that I’m not easy.”
“I’m not, either. I don’t mind. This…no one’s ever given me anything like this…thank you, Y/N/N. I love it.”
It feels like barely a second, until we’re kissing, her breath mixing with mine, the two of us tangling together in the water…we stop, for barely a second, just long enough for her to slip the ring on my finger, and then I’m lying on my back on the pool steps, and she’s making her way over my chest, up and down until she’s down, just enough…I don’t know how, but she’s always ready, reaching into her shorts for a condom, sliding her tongue hard enough that I feel dizzy, lost…we don’t even talk, I couldn’t anyway; I only have to slip my fingers over her arm for her to slide up, slide in, legs around my waist, hair everywhere…I slip my fingers around her hips, sliding her underwear all the way down, slipping in slowly so I don’t hurt her…she pushes down, though, the rest of the way, and then we’re pressed chest to chest, and I’m kissing her.
“I love you so fucking much.”
She doesn’t answer, doesn’t need to…she bites my shoulder, and I come…finish her off, until we’re both on our backs on the steps, and I’m all the way under her, the only way to chase away the cold.
