and green all over

Edward E. Nygma. Private Investigator. Former head of the GCPD Cyber Crimes unit. May I help you? Part of Justice Lounge, closed rp.

[riddlemenomore]

ooc

((Back from vacation! Dealing with jetlag and a family emergency, but I'll be back to posting in a day or two))

[riddlemenomore]

ooc

((Just popping in to say that I've been getting ready to go on vacation, and won't be online a ton in the next two weeks (my flight leaves tonight, and I come back on the 16th). I'm bringing my laptop with me, and I'll still try to post and stuff, but in all likelihood won't be very active until I get back.))

[riddlemenomore]

[text]: yuo dint say if i shuold come ovr to yuor place or if yuo were gonna come ovr here so i got bord and chuged a botle of odka

[txt] Oh shit, sorry, I got caught up in something

[txt] I need to finish reprogramming some of my data stores so I don’t have people poking around in there, then I’ll be over.

[txt] Are you alright?

[thelostredhood]

[text]: ist fine

[text]: im ok jsut a litle dizy

[riddlemenomore]

[txt] No, I mean.

[txt] Emotionally. Emotionally, are you alright?

[txt] ...I'm very bad at this.

[riddlemenomore]

[text]: yuo dint say if i shuold come ovr to yuor place or if yuo were gonna come ovr here so i got bord and chuged a botle of odka

[txt] Oh shit, sorry, I got caught up in something

[txt] I need to finish reprogramming some of my data stores so I don't have people poking around in there, then I'll be over.

[txt] Are you alright?

[oodelollie]

Really? So clowns don’t ask riddles? Is there some kind of professional boundary that you don’t cross, or something?

[riddlemenomore]

Assuming you're referring to the abomination that is the Joker, no, clowns don't tell riddles. He tells jokes, I tell riddles, there's a difference. And it's of the utmost importance for us Gotham villains to keep our modus operandi separate.

[riddlemenomore]

oodelollie replied to your post:If you had a catchphrase, what would it be?

Are you sure? I thought it was the Cheshire Cat. Or the March Hare. Or maybe the Joker. Or some random clown with too much time on his hands. Hey diddle diddle, the clown and the riddle, you know that old rhyme.

No, no no--while it's true that the 'hey diddle diddle' one originates from an old nursery rhyme, 'riddle me this, riddle me that' was original. And certainly not the Joker.

[riddlemenomore]

If you had a catchphrase, what would it be?

...Are you kidding me? I was the one who invented that phrase 'riddle me this'.

[riddlemenomore]

brick + mortar - terrible things

sometimes I think of doing terrible things i know i shouldn't think it but I do anyway maybe i'm just crazy like i got a disease

[gidjun]

One of my all-time favorite Batman pages.

[thelostredhood]

Let it Burn || @riddlemenomore [Slight Flashback]

The taxi arrived at Edward’s apartment quickly enough. Familiar with the place from a few visits before, Jason casually snagged the key out of Edward’s pocket to let himself in while he paid the cab fare. He would pay him back for that later,but for the moment, his leg was throbbing sharply and he just needed to get off his feet.

So he hobbled into Edward’s place and plopped down on the couch, kicking his bad leg up onto the cushions.

[riddlemenomore]

Eddie hadn't noticed Jason had swiped his keys until he had already paid the cabby and was impatiently waiting for the elevator to take him up to the sixth floor--absently thinking that hopefully Jason remembered what apartment number he occupied--and had reached into his trouser pocket. His first reaction, was, of course, to panic, but then realized exactly who had accompanied him home. In all likelihood, Jason had taken his keys. Hopefully.

After an anxiety-ridden elevator ride, during which Eddie checked his pockets another three times just to make sure, his previous suspicion was proven correct when there was no sight of Jason Todd in the hallway.

The door was unlocked, so Eddie let himself in, grateful to finally be home. The familiar, inhumanely clean and neat surroundings were comforting, especially after their little adventure in the burned building earlier. He peeked into the living room, and tried not to let himself get too worked up over the fact that Jason had put his feet on the couch (deep breaths, Edward, he thought), before quietly slipping away into the spotless kitchen.

He was reaching for a water glass and snapping his pill organizer shut, idly wondering about the earlier events of the evening when he realized, with an awful start, that his life was boring.

Here was a perfectly detailed, challenging puzzle laid out for him, and then here Eddie was, with a career that mostly consisted of spying on cheating spouses, reluctant to get involved in anything bigger.

...Did he really want to spend the next six months of his life like that?

Edward choked down the rest of his pills, and wandered out into the sitting room, very green eyes fixing themselves firmly on Jason.

"Okay," he conceded, voice wavering just the slightest amount. "Consider me--temporarily--back in the game. Maybe the Riddler isn't dead... yet. And I know for a fact your crowd are going to need his help before this big mystery is over."

[theblondebat]

"Nope!" she said, popping her lips on the ‘p’. "Just stopping in to say hi. Plus we had a Jeopardy marathon playing on the tv at work and it made me think of you." She looked down at her feet and with some embarrassment took note of the bit of mud she’d tracked in. Steph did a quick backtrack and wiped her worn, muddy sneakers against the welcome mat, shaking out her damp hair from her hood. "Sorry about that. Here’s a teaser to say sorry: What goes up when rain comes down?" 

[riddlemenomore]

Eddie couldn't help but give a little satisfied smile at the mention of jeopardy. "I auditioned for that show once, you know--I was so good they thought I cheated, and wouldn't let me go on," he said, matter-of-factly, sounding a tad bit impressed with himself, even now.

The riddle was... a little unexpected, and he found himself answering "an umbrella" before he could really even think about it, slipping back into the compulsion effortlessly. He winced, and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, and proceeded to quickly change the subject.

"I'm... surprised you came to see me, I wasn't under the impression we were on very friendly terms, after that business with your father," he started, awkwardly, looking lost in the interaction, unsure of quite what to say or do. "I'm sorry about that, by the way," Eddie added, a little softer, a flash of remorse in his eyes. He sighed. "But, here I am, turning over a new leaf. How are you doing? I assume you're still playing with the Bats?"

[helveticaes-deactivated20180220]

batman: arkham origins + Enigma/Edward Nashton game over screens

[why-i-love-comics]

Injustice: Gods Among Us - “Chapter 16”

written by Tom Taylor art by Mike S. Miller

[riddlemenomore]

Eddie and Babs - Bonnie and Clyde AU

"When you said you’d steal the… the stars for me if I wanted them, did that bracket include a little extra t-time?"

He means it as a joke, maybe, but any humor in the statement falls flat long before his voice cracks, a lump welling up in his throat. Eddie swallows, fights it down, blinks away the sudden pinpricks on the back of his eyelids.

"…Eddie, I’m so sorry," is all Babs can say, voice quiet, tortured. She rolls forward, the MRI brain scan copies sliding off her lap to be forgotten on the floor of their dinky, musty motel room purchased under assumed names.

"It’s okay," he says, but it isn’t. It isn’t as if they hadn’t both known what they were getting into, Eddie already diagnosed with a seven month expiration date back in April when they’d met.

They’ve made a dangerous couple in the meantime at least, given Catwoman a run for her money as far as thievery went. They’ll be infamous forever, a sort of modern Bonnie and Clyde, but that’s small comfort for Eddie, who… has a month left, two at most, and he doesn’t want to die like this, on the run and wasting away in seedy motel rooms while the chemo and the cancer make him progressively sicker. He’s already starting to lose motor coordination, he can’t speak without stuttering, he can’t think without feeling fuzzy around the edges (and that’s by far the worst part).

"I-I just… just always thought I’d go out in a… b-bang or something, you know?"

She’s silent for a long moment, and Eddie almost thinks he’s being abandoned when Babs turns her chair around and heads for the door, until she stops just short of it to say something.

"I think the air in here is going to poison me. Let’s go for a drive."

The police are on the lookout for our car, we have to lay low, you know that—he doesn’t say, and swallows thickly, the knowledge passing between them that if they walk out that door, they’ll never make it back alive.

History repeats itself. Eddie thinks of Bonnie and Clyde.

"Okay," he says, and moves to hold open the door.

[riddlemenomore]

Dick and Eddie, College AU

"I can explain!" Dick is saying, complete with wild hand gestures to illustrate his point, although honestly Eddie has no idea what point that is, and feels a strong urge to duck before he gets accidentally punched in the face. Maybe he’s trying to perform some sort of… magic warding ritual, seeing as Dick has parked himself firmly in front of the door to their dorm room, and has been denying him access for the past fifteen minutes.

"I don’t care,” Eddie snaps back, neurotically adjusting his glasses, and eyes the door handle under Dick’s flailing arm, wondering if he possesses enough speed or force to reach it. In the end, the best option seems to be to make a dive for the door handle—Dick lunges for him when he does, arms wrapping around his torso, but not before the door has swung open just enough to reveal…

Glitter. What can only be about a tonne of glitter, covering every surface imaginable.

Eddie near about has an aneurysm on the spot from the combined shock of what’s happened to their poor room, and the fact that Dick’s hands are placed securely over his pectoral muscles.

[riddlemenomore]

Eddie and Jason - Student/Teacher AU

"This is incredibly inappropriate,” Eddie protests hotly, even as Jason pushes him flush against the edge of his desk. He tries to find some sort of leverage, but only manages to put his elbow in a mug of cold coffee, tipping it over and sending it spilling over sheets of hand copied computer code and students’ essays. oddly enough, he can’t bring himself to care much, but he’s always had a hard time focusing when Jason makes that look at him, eyes dark and mouth curved upward in a shark-toothed smile, looking ravenous, as if he hadn’t eaten in days, was about to devour Edward alive—

"Hey, I’m not even asking for a grade this time," Jason shoots back, and even though he’s still giving Eddie the look, he manages to sound completely innocent. “And I gotta keep up with my extra-curriculars,” he adds, an afterthought as he leans in.

Eddie closes his eyes, lets out a stuttered breath at the scrape of teeth on the delicate skin of his neck. Jason only laughs, quiet and low in a way that sends shivers down Eddie’s spine, and breathes “isn’t that right, Professor?”

[riddlemenomore]

Eddie and Bruce - Sexy Secretary AU

It’s not that was trying to seduce his boss—okay, well, maybe a little, but to be fair, so was everyone else, so Eddie had really needed to step up his game, take things to the extreme if he wanted to be noticed.

…Although on second thought, maybe showing up to the company Christmas party in a backless, very sequined green dress was a little too much.

And then that thought was erased completely when he felt a large, calloused hand come to rest on the bare skin of his back, a rich, deep baritone in his ear: “Edward.”

"Good evening, Mr. Wayne," Eddie managed to breathe back, heart fluttering like a caged bird in his chest, and turned to face his boss in the dim light of the slowly emptying ballroom.