some things about me: i am Jewish, white, bisexual, an anti-zionist, USian, and a transsexual that uses he/him exclusively.
i’m a horror fan and often find dark subjects interesting to explore in fiction. this means that sometimes i talk about media with themes around stuff like violence, abuse, SA, etc on this blog. filter that out if it bothers you.
if i say something fucked up without realizing it, i want to know. feel free to send me an ask about it.
enjoy your stay 👍
general stuff:
this is a bit of a smorgasbord blog
relevant tags:
#myscrabbles - for my writing.
#storycrafting - about my current projects
#tsoh - about tsoh, one of my current fiction projects. it stands for something but don’t worry about it lol. if any of these posts interest you, i have a sideblog called @tsoh-archive you can follow for more pieces and
#// ventilation - vent posts, probably about transphobia or antisemitism etc. filter out if that bothers you.
some of my general positions for reference:
i’m a Jewish anti-zionist. i believe in the rights and liberation of Palestinians and i also will not tolerate antisemitism from goyim who may share some of my beliefs, because those things are not mutually exclusive.
as a rule most things are nuanced
i don’t believe in transandrophobia: as in, i think it’s a stupid descriptor attempting to describe real experiences (trans men experiencing transphobia) in an unfeminist way. block me if you don’t like that.
bottom line opinion of mine is that human sexuality is naturally weird and has all sorts of facets, ppls kinks are value neutral. the only real exception to that imo is raceplay, something im not even going to try to defend nor do i want to.
discourse topics that get a whopping Who Cares from me: bi vs pan discourse, micro labels being the supposed fall of queer community, most Problematic Kinks, any specific beef between users on here that you’d need an entire encyclopedia to understand
Going through an authors interviews/writings and then ‘she’ starts suddenly talking about how ‘she’ wanted to be a gay man and felt disconnected from womenhood
Reading Anne Rice quotes about their gender makes me profoundly sad because they died clearly repressed, but also god damn that explains a lot about some of the gender stuff in Rice’s books. I read the interviews and my eyebrows went up and went “oh that explains a lot”
anyway i need tvl to show magnus turning lestat in that evil fucking tower asap so i can edit it to ptolomaea by ethel cain, probably interspersed with lestat’s other worst moments (dropping louis, letting claudia die, etc)
that scene from Queen of the Damned where marius and armand meet again while a newly-turned daniel stumbles around in the background is insane. pov your dad shows up and launches you into an immediate fawn trauma response so hard that you completely forget about your newborn infant
daniel’s stumbling around blissed out on ancient blood running into walls and shit. everyone’s like armand your baby is drunkenly interviewing a lamp can you come get him but armand is gone. armand is not present. armand is fawning so hard he’s made a new world record. that bitch is in venice as we speak and it will be weeks before he comes back up for air. dude he doesn’t even remember daniel’s fucking name
The skeleton of a young girl, about 14 years old, was found in a room [in Pompeii] holding an eleven-month-old baby in her arms. The infant was adorned with bronze ornaments, which shows it belonged to the higher classes. The girl cannot be the mother, since she was still in her prepubertal phase. Moreover she clearly did not belong to the upper class. An analysis of her teeth reveals that she had been severely ill or undernourished in the first year of her life. Various molars displayed abscesses and shortly before her death a few teeth had been extracted. Her shoulder muscles bore traces of unremitting physical effort caused by lifting heavy weights. Most probably, Bisel concludes, she was a slave girl who was given the care of the baby by her master, unfit for other tasks, as she was worn down by hard labor.
another one for the ‘incredibly haunting archeological find descriptions’ files ["child slaves at work in roman antiquity," christian laes]
i’m probably like the only person on earth who thinks one of the most interesting characters in the sagas of the iliad/oddyssey/oresteia/etc is fuckin’. helenus of troy, cassandra’s punk ass brother. like who cares…. but it’s me. i care
i’ve condensed my major Helenus Interests into three broad categories
helenus as brother of cassandra/lover of apollo & the implications therein. there’s a lot to be explored in the idea that the start of the story for these two characters is their exploitation by a literal god and the fact that it both blesses and dooms them. helenus is spared the curse of his sister for whatever reason, and that must create a rift between them, dooming her to eternal frustration and him to eternally trying to translate for her or perhaps his failure to do so. did he abandon her struggle, as the only person to understand her, receiving the very same prophecies she did? or did he graft himself to her side in a vain attempt to fix something outside of his power in every way? and in the end both of them partitioned off as spoils of war, leaving cassandra to a much more grisly fate than her brother; as was always the case. he couldn’t (or didn’t) save her in every way. both victim himself but also a more empowered victim than the person he couldn’t save. where does that leave him?
helenus the prophet that brought troy’s destruction. to make a long story short, helenus throws a fit over not getting to marry helen and runs off to sulk in a cave; there he is found by Odysseus and forced (?) to divulge the prophetic information that achilles son pyrrhus will end the war. essentially, helenus throws a very entitled hissy fit over the fate of a woman he didn’t care about and the result of this action was the end of his freedom, the death of his sister, and the destruction of troy. the guilt of that burden! the responsibility he must feel! and this time the fate of his family really IS his fault! the tragedy! the drama!!
helenus as husband of andromache and king of epirus. at the end of his tale helenus’s master pyrrhus is killed and his lands partitioned off into different kingdoms, one of which helenus comes to rule. he also marries andromache, the widow of his beloved brother, concubine of their shared master, and mother of three sons who could only have been conceived through rape. helenus and her presumedly raise these sons together. what does this marriage look like? what did their relationship look like before that marriage, when they lived under the same man in the same household? does andromache blame helenus for the fate of troy and ultimately her murdered infant? does she even feel permitted to harbor such resentment? what do they tell their sons about the crime that bore them? how do these two survivors go about living the rest of their lives when finally allowed to settle freely in the wreckage? so! much! material!
not my fault anne rice was born in 1940’s new orleans with the sensibilities and temperament of an ancient athenian pederast and decided to make it my problem
Guy who watched 1 Hail Mary video log: I think he fucked the rock
Guy who watched 5 Hail Mary video logs: comments like that belie a narrow, heteronormative view of relationships. Dr. Grace and Rocky’s bond is something that likely transcends baser human categories like “sexual” or “romantic”. Either way, all this speculation on the nature of their relationship takes away from more important conversations about Dr. Grace’s contributions-
Guy who watched all the Hail Mary video logs: I think the rock fucked him
my friend's puppy has baffling levels of attitude for someone who's only been around for a handful of months. he understands concepts like deceit and civil disobedience and other things i didn't fully grasp until well into my 20s. this guy doesn't even know the seasons loop yet. he's probably like okay spring. what's next. some other new bullshit i bet
