crystal girl.

in any generation, i sparkle.

[rknvna]

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dashofnana   beauty is power, and a smile is it’s sword.  ♡ —— view all 47 comments 1 HOUR AGO

[rknvna]

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dashofnana   didn’t think i would actually miss it, hul ... ( komu probably does too ) —— view all 16 comments 30 MINUTES AGO

[rknvna]

♚┋ ❛ sprinkles on top ,

◆ ◆ ◆  ↝  it’s all for you, @rkbyunbaek ♡

nana has been trying so hard with her cooking as of late.

trying and consistently failing.

but there is some progress. before it was almost as if every food item she touched was destined to be dead on arrival the moment it came in contact with her -- becoming scorched, black, rotten and practically unedible to anyone or anything with a stomach, no matter how diligent she was with following a cookbook. but within the past couple of months there’s something different -- there’s life within her food now. color, a lift, even a smell that doesn’t remind one of burnt rubber upon the pavement.

looks can be deceiving, after all.

it brings about an excitement in nana that causes the woman to bring a little delicacy to lunch -- it’s nothing special, far from what her cook could actually drum up if she would of asked. just a couple of cupcakes that she was hoping to share with soohyun or another willing party, ecstatic that her skill in cooking has gone from -3 to possibly 0.5 within the last year or so. so ecstatic that she doesn’t notice the slight deflation at the top of the small treats, just slathers icing upon the top in a decent way and heads off for training, nearly forgetting about their existence until lunch.

until she sits down and takes a hearty bite of her creation only to find that it’s missing sugar -- and that the inside is more goopy instead of fluffy, almost causing a mess upon her face and thighs as it splashes downward. and she wants to laugh, knew it had to be too good to be true whenever it came to her and cooking. how wonderful.

the woman instead tosses the bag with the remainder on an empty table, leaves it abandoned while she heads towards the line in the organic cafe to eat something that doesn’t taste like slimy tree bark. ( or at least, that’s what she would think it would taste like, not that she has any knowledge on it. ) a sigh passes glossed lips as she strolls out aftewards, wanting to forget the whole thing even happened and just eat -- until her plans come to a screeching halt  upon seeing seeing baekhyun, one of the sunbae’s names she learns by way of others and someone to add on her list of intimidating people -- holding one of her monstrosities in his hand. and it takes everything within her to power walk and not break out into a run to stop him, lithe fingers wrapping around his forearm while she calls out “sunbae!” in a voice that almost sounds panicked, so much that it even startles her, “hello, sorry. um, i wouldn’t eat those if i were you. not if you value your life, i mean.” she attempts to grin only until she realizes how that sounds, a light pink dusting her cheeks before she waves a free hand, “ah, not like that! it’s just ... not ... very good ...”

[rknvna]

———  AUGUST EVALUATION  ▸  " UGLY BEAUTY “ BY JOLIN TSAI    ›  ›  ›  ›   SKILLS TESTED :  language ( chinese ) / live singing / rapping

she wonders how long she has to be a trainee until evaluations stop making you so nervous -- or if that even goes away at all.

or she wonders if the nerves come from the higher standards she puts herself to, how she expects more for her skills and when they don’t reach that goal, how she only pushes herself to be better, that her mistakes came from not practicing as hard as should of. even she can admit that she might be a little too hard on herself, but beyonce didn’t get to where she was today by taking it easy, right?

why should she?

but as nana studies the other performances while she waits for her turn, she comes to think that she should try to put herself out there more and perform in groups. doing things alone builds character, that much she knows through experience, but the pros of being in a group is that the small mistakes are much less amplified, can be covered up by others who do it well.

it actually strikes a little more fear in her than usual whenever her name is called, as she strolls to the marked place of her performance and goes into her beginning pose. she tries to remember the positive comments of her trainers and the trainee that helped her, remembers that they aren’t expecting perfection from anyone in this evaluation and it only helps a bit. whenever the beat fills the room and she parts her lips to sing, she could only hope that every single god or powerful deity up above had favor over her right now.

and it doesn’t help that chinese sounds so awkward coming from her lips -- at least, from her point of view -- and that the song’s register is a tiny bit higher than what she would of liked to sing at. thankfully the choreography isn’t much of a struggle, so she takes it a little easier on hitting every single move in order to make sure that her voice is more stable, that they can understand what she’s trying to say and it doesn’t come out mumbled, breathy, wrong.

especially whenever it comes to the parts where she has to hold out her note -- nana tries to do so to completion and with vigor. she knows that she isn’t a vocalist and probably would never be. she’s happy that there’s a small break from singing within the chorus and she can focus upon her dancing and attitude where in which she shines with ease. it’s only a small break before she’s singing again but it gives her enough time to recoup before focusing on her pronunciation consistently. 

she wants to do the song justice -- nana chose the song in particular because of the message and how it could instill confidence in anyone who sings along. it’s a song that she would hope to release in her future regardless if it was by herself or within a group, and it’s an image that she would like to see more often within the music industry. 

the hardest part for her comes to the small rap break, having to say the words within a quick rhythmic manner was already difficult enough in korean, but it became a completely different monster in chinese. even though it’s the part she focused on the most during practice, she still feels like she’s meshing the words together, a little indistinguishable when compared with her singing. it’s almost like she wants to get through it instead of actually feeling it, and she knows she’s going to be called out for it as well.

and naturally the performance isn’t perfect, but it’s better than what it was in the beginning of the month. and whenever she strikes her ending pose and exits, what she is proud of is the fact that she could see some improvement from when first started some months ago. a silver lining in every situation.

[rknvna]

———  AUGUST EVALUATION  ▸  PREPARATION   ›  ›  ›  ›   LOCATION :  ROYAL PRACTICE ROOM

when it is first revealed that this month’s evaluation theme is about learning new languages, it leaves a bad taste in nana’s throat, brings about a bad memory within the company where her korean language skills were mocked by one of the employee’s own in a rather degrading manner. she’s reminded of the humiliation and anger after being told that in such a manner in front of a classroom of fatigued faces, reminded of the elementary style classes she was forced to attend, the smarmy smirk of the trainer who seemed to revel in her shock --

but instead of remaining within the retrospection, she attempts to will it away -- after all, the same man who conjured up those vile words against her was no longer here, and it wasn’t the same kind of evaluation. royal seems to have evolved from that time, and the woman comes to apprehend that she couldn’t continue to hold it against the company for so long.

nana does find herself a bit annoyed that she couldn’t use her skills in japanese or in english, doesn’t enjoy the fact that she would be seen in a better light to learn a new language that she could potentially use in her years as an idol, instead of ones that she’s about 90 percent certain that she absolutely would use. the work to learn a new language from zero makes her mind feel weak even before she already begins, but she also knows that she’s too much of a perfectionist to just handle being average when there’s an opportunity for something more.

the decision to learn chinese is an easy one. there were already small fractions of the language that she knew due to being friends with ariel and it only made sense to start learning it considering it could be used in the future. she could learn spanish or something like swedish if she wanted to stand out from the crowd ( and it did sound tempting for a long while ), but the cons of learning chinese outweigh the cons and pros of the others. 

but learning the language as an adult didn’t come with the same ease of learning different languages as a child, and she finds that the majority of her time is spent in classes, not just wanting to make sure her pronunciation is stellar but wanting to understand what she’s singing, and wanting to make sure that she isn’t butchering such a beautiful language -- especially since she’s decided to dance while singing since her voice isn’t enough on it’s own. 

she even borrows a chinese trainee during her downtime for that extra assurance, going over the song with her and asking for critiques. she knew she wasn’t going to wow the trainers -- not by a long shot, but nana pushes herself in order to make up for the mediocre to horrible evaluations of the past. 

[rknvna]

❤   💬   ➤ 1473 likes

dashofnana   今こそ ワタシらしく / 咲きたい —— view all 80 comments 3 HOURS AGO

[rknvna]

♚┋ ❛ sweet time ,

[rknvna]

rkhongjoong‌:

hongjoong heard that they’ve gotten new trainees recently, but he hasn’t had a chance to meet with any of them yet.  the evaluations this month are a little brutal, both physically and mentally so he’s doing his best to keep up since that’s practically one of the top priorities when it comes to training.  if they don’t meet expectations on evaluations, then there’s always a chance that royal could give up on them  -  and he gets it, so he always does his best, even on evaluations that don’t suit him well.  unfortunately sometimes things fall to the wayside, and that means that this time, hongjoong hasn’t had a chance to greet the new trainees.  he supposes that they haven’t had the time to greet him, either  -  considering that this evaluation is just that brutal.

he wants to, though.  maybe when this month is over, they’ll all have a chance to meet.

that’s what he keeps telling himself as hongjoong goes through the motions and stretches his limbs to start the day.  he’s keeping to himself for the most part, not really focused on his surroundings but maybe if he was, he’d notice im jinah in a place where he’s not used to seeing her.  it’s been awhile since they last spoke, since they last met even but he’d recognize her anywhere, no matter how long it’s been.

so when she approaches him this time, he almost falls in mid -stretch.  with his eyes wide, hongjoong catches himself and stands upright, lips spreading into one of his signature grins that show all of his teeth.  it’s almost like no time for them has passed at all when she greets him and he smiles.  he’s taken back to the days they were in the same class together, when she’d worry over her new kitten and he’d laugh and tell her she’s going to be a great cat mom.  it takes him a minute to recover but when he does, he literally looks like a meme.  blinking too much, a little shake of his head.  hongjoong can’t help but laugh.  " i didn’t expect to see you here.“  he finally says, raising a brow quizzically to encourage her to tell him.  ” what do you mean since you were last here …“ he mumbles, trying to piece the information together.

” wait, were you a trainee before? i’ve been here for almost two years and i’ve never seen you around -“

sweet and adorable.

and it wasn’t as if nana had overlooked these characteristics of her friend before -- because, in all honesty, they were so apparent within the boy that it was pretty hard to do so -- but even on the chance that she happened to forget, hongjoong’s simple actions jogged her memory within the first five seconds of seeing him again. it was nice to see how he was still so animated even in the mornings, the way he seems to straighten himself up in surprise causes amusement to pull at glossed lips, bringing it into a grin of her own. “i can tell, your face journey made that obvious. is it that crazy to see me here?” the girl questions with a chuckle slipping out. the wide eyed look he was giving her only seconds before makes her want to tell him the good news, resting lightly upon the tip of her tongue --

but she’ll probably make him wait a little more. just because.

the woman lets out a little inquisitive hum at the other’s words, hearing sharp enough to understand what he said but the reception that he receives from her is casual, nothing more but a tilt of her head while she gives a couple of innocent blinks in his direction. she swears she can almost physically see the cogs in his head turning, and she has to swallow down the laughter that bubbles within her throat, wanting to practically give herself away already. “mmh. it was before you were here, i left ... three years ago, i believe? i almost made it to two years too, but ...” nana trails off, ending her sentence with a shrug. it wasn’t really important in the long run anyways. “but i’m here now, and that’s what matters, right? i thought you would be more happy to see me! especially sine we’ll be seeing each other a lot more often. i’m hurt, hongjoong.” she finds herself jutting out her lower lip in a pout, hands covering her heart in faux heartbreak before she whispers, “i thought we had something special.”

[rkrosememories]

CAFE LATTE.

[rknvna]

rkrose‌:

rose wasn’t used to receiving compliments from people so casually. usually, she hears them from her parents or her boyfriend, yet she’s grateful for the compliment from nana, even if she is a little awkward in accepting it. rose doesn’t think of herself as beautiful. she doesn’t really fit the beauty standards of korea, nor has she ever really tried to ( although she did have the figure most idols sought after, so maybe that was a positive on her end ). rose was used to being surrounded by beautiful people at both royal and seocho, but she had come to learn that beauty wasn’t always conventional and that all people had the capability of being beautiful in their own way, as cheesy as it may sound.

the older female explains her past ties with royal, having been scouted some years ago, sticking around for almost a year before giving it up. rose doesn’t bother to query as to why she left it all behind, perhaps that isn’t for her to know. she could come to understand why someone might think like that; after all, she’s been there once or twice. “well, maybe you were meant to end up here in the end.” rose says with a shrug. it’s always nice to have a new face around the company, to be able to meet someone new and follow their journey was always a positive for rose. in her early days at royal, she found it so difficult to find her place and settle in, and now … she really couldn’t see herself anywhere else. she has hopes to fulfilling her dreams under this label. she can only hope that royal loves her as much as she loves it. rose was hopeful that nana would stick around long enough to see a debut with rose and the rest of the girls. maybe it was too early to start being hopeful for these things, but rose already had a good feeling about her.

“i got myself into quite a mess when our schedules were between royal and seocho. it’ll take a bit of time, but you’ll adjust!” rose recalls her early trainee days, the confusion of not knowing where she had to be at what time, and what she was supposed to be doing. it felt as though she was a student all over again. “most of us hang around seocho, but i think with the new building, we’ll be at royal a little more often now.” rose adds with a firm nod of her head. she’s looking forward to having a cup of coffee with nana; coffee dates were always a good sign. today seemed to be a big day for reminiscing for rose, because nana’s question regarding rose’s beginnings at royal has her back there, at square one. rose sighs, brushing her hair back out of her face. “it’s going to be three years this december.” rose says carefully, looking at the older female. “i signed with them in 2016 after i won a contest; red-haired, guitar attached to my hip.”

‘well, maybe you were meant to end up here in the end.’ nana finds it somewhat amusing that the other thinks this way as well -- because it’s not the first time she’s heard something similar to that. she’s heard similar from yoojung, from soohyun, from some of the other trainees as well whenever she explains herself during casual conversation. it could come off as an obvious statement to relay, but as someone who was a definite believer in fate, she comes to think that  maybe it was something that the universe was trying to tell her. “i’m hoping so. i was kind of young and dumb when i first joined, and didn’t really give the company a chance back then. and i know i haven’t been here too long to get a good grasp on everyone ... but at least upon the girls side, everyone seems to work well together which is pretty nice. a little shocking, but in a good way.” she would of thought relationships might be a little more cut throat, but so far it doesn’t seem to be that way.

the girl finds herself chuckling slightly at rose’s words, absolutely believing them whenever it came to figuring out how schedules worked exactly. “i don’t doubt you. i hope you don’t mind me coming to you for help more often -- my sense of direction is ... no where to be found, to be honest.” the woman says with a light grin. if she were to be completely honest, nana isn’t even sure how the merger works in general but that seemed to be an entirely different beast that she would save for a different time, a different conversation. “oh, so you get to choose where to go? there’s no mandatory days or strict schedule or anything like that?” she questions the other, truly feeling like a hoobae at this particular moment. her mind travels away from that and onto rose’s beginnings, raising her eyebrow when she mentions how long she’s with the company. three years? now that’s a commitment. “wow, that’s pretty amazing! three years ... and you play guitar? ah, that actually makes sense. you do give off a bit of flower child vibes.” she nods to herself as they start to walk towards the cafe, “so are you a singer-songwriter? or do you mainly just sing?”

[rknvna]

hi i love rknvna so much! i just read your rkfreestyle solo and i smiled through the whole thing! you're so good at writing ^^ hopefully we can plot in the future ~

* fjdklsa; anon why did u put urself through that but thank u so much sweet anon, this honestly brightened my day!! i’m definitely a slow turtle but i do hope we can plot soon as well!! don’t be shy, i’m always willing!!!!   ♡♡♡

[rknvna]

[ sms ] do you ever think about the fact that you're a trainee and i'm stuck in a dungeon where i cannot see you. i will request samsung ceo to move you to sphere brb

⟨ ˟ 💌 ▸▸ 𝗧𝗘𝗫𝗧 𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗧 ／ 𝘤𝘰𝘰𝘭 𝘨𝘶𝘺 𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘯 ⟩  ‧ ‧ ‧ ➤  ㅋㅋㅋ should of stayed a trainee, then you could of relaxed with me at the vacation house we went to for our last evaluation  ‧ ‧ ‧ ➤  but /no/, you just had to be so full of charisma and talent that they had to debut you asap （￣へ￣）ㅋ  ‧ ‧ ‧ ➤  hmm, can’t say i would mind if you’re there, that’s an automatic plus ~ how is sphere, by the way?

[rkrosememories]

CAFE LATTE.

[rknvna]

rkrose‌:

honestly, she is unsure as to how she is supposed to respond. so, she just continues to smile at nana. “well, i’m happy that i got the opportunity to welcome you.” a welcome, even if it was just a small hello, made everything all that better. it took rose over two years to feel like she was a part of royal’s furniture. she had a good circle of people around her and given her status as a senior trainee, she was starting to go out of her way to welcome the newcomers. rose knows firsthand how difficult it can be at first, the beginning of things are never easy but over time, it gets better. and now, she was lucky enough to have two of her best friends in the same company as her, all waiting for a debut together. so, what more could rose ask for? rose, a unique kind of pretty. she hadn’t ever thought of herself in that light, but she’ll take it. rose isn’t one to argue and she knows that maybe, some other people, would be likely to dispute her not agreeing. 

“ah, t-thank you.” rose says shyly, trying to cover her reddening cheeks. she got shy when people complimented her. she couldn’t help it. “i might as well admit that i was flawed by how pretty you are.” rose admits to nana openly. pretty inside and out, nana at first meeting was both beautiful and kind. this was abnormal, wasn’t it? rose is taken back by the confession that nana is not the newcomer she thought she was. turns out, she’s been here before, in her own shoes. rose looks at her, wide-eyed. “oh, it’s not your first time here?” rose reiterates, brows raised. “like here? at royal?” maybe she didn’t mean royal, maybe she had been a trainee under one of the other big companies. rose relates; that feeling of being overwhelmed, surrounded by new things and new faces. couldn’t be easy to leave somewhere and come back to the same thing, only it’s not.

“i feel you,” rose admits with a smile. “it was a jump to go from royal to seocho, and now this…” rose murmurs, gesturing to the space around them. nana’s next request is heart-warming, it’s weird for rose to be looked up at, to be ‘the sunbae’. rose smiles through her teeth, shrugging. how could she say no to this girl? “how about we start over a cup of coffee at the new cafe?”

to be humble in the wake of compliments is to be expected in this day and age, manufactured into being the standard reply for women especially in order to be accepted. but there was always something so intriguing for nana when she came across people who were genuinely ignorant of their beauty, this especially so for the girl in front of her because it doesn’t seem to just end at the physical; no, there’s a calm type of feminine allure to her as well. along with the adorable way the pink tint seems to stain her cheeks, nana feels like it’s something that should be as clear as day. “no problem, but don’t be so shy about it! or actually ... do continue, because that will just give me more excuses to remind you,” she mentions lightly, a simper spreading across her features.

now it’s her turn to return the behavior when the younger mentions nana’s own beauty, and the woman truly is flattered at her words. “aww, thank you. it’s nice to see that my efforts are being recognized.” she’s laughing. the woman takes note at rose’s surprise, nodding her head lightly at the other’s question before elaborating, “mmh. i was scouted by royal some years ago and lasted almost ... two years, i believe? but i left and didn’t think i’d come back again but well ... life seemed to have different plans.” and royal didn’t bother waiting on her, apparently. she lifts her hand, thumb smoothing along the cotton hem of her neckline, eyebrows shooting upwards at the mention of seocho, “yes, that too! that also wasn’t around when i was a trainee so between the old building, new building and this? i’m not even sure where i’m supposed to report to tomorrow, and knowing me i’d probably end up in some other company’s class.” deer in the headlights look and all.

and she’s truly thankful that rose seems to be receptive to her offer, the smile upon her face growing as a physical manner of thanks to the girl. “yes, i’d love to. i’ve been dying to see if this place is truly worth all the hype.” nana says, moving her arms to the side while she stretches out her spine in preparation. “but also, we’ve been talking too much about myself, i want to know more about you -- how long have you been at royal?”

[rkyooa]

road of miracles.

the news received via text of jinah making it into royal was exciting, but it hadn’t hit shiah like seeing her in the hallways of the new royal building did. it was like a ton of bricks had smashed into her, both of pure joy and excitement, but also of dread and worry. this… wouldn’t be like… dahye… would it? 

shiah had experienced a couple scenarios of knowing someone prior to joining royal, namely females she could have potentially debuted with. the first was dahye, whom she had known through her at-the-time fiance and had become good friends with, who then eventually had left the company, leaving behind their shared dream of debuting together for a set of new dreams. there was seolhyun, whom shiah would’ve loved to debut with, but the other had been given the opportunity and had debuted ahead of shiah, while she herself was left to continue her training. now here stood jinah, her friend from her modelling days, as well as a fellow dancer. familiar bells were ringing in her head… would they get to debut together like shiah desperately wanted them to? or would something happen to separate them from that dream? maybe shiah would debut first, or jinah would find a different dream to pursue. either way… shiah couldn’t help but feel worried to an extent. 

it didn’t overshadow her happiness as she moved to embrace her chingu happily. “finally! i’m not the oldest one anymore!” she laughs. it was only but a few days, but shiah was younger than her. she would still be the unnie, but now she was one of the unnies. thank goodness for that. “do you know your way around yet? or do you need a tour?” she asks, eyebrows wiggling to entice her into a mini shiah tour. it wasn’t the first time she had offered or given one.

@rknvna

[rknvna]

nana has never thought herself to be an incautious person. no, if she could plan every single event of her life down to every explicit moment she would without a second thought; in lieu of the ideal, the woman tends to take extra care when it comes to the situations she decides to put herself in -- every action, every thought, every word along with future ones executed after thoughtful deliberation and used accordingly. but after a few days settling within royal, allowing her body to get acclimated to the rigorous training regiment once more, she comes to wonder if she truly thought this idol dream of hers through.

the woman knows that she’s returning to the same company she swore off years ago with an open mind, so she wouldn’t let past insecurities cripple her mentality as it did once before. but as curious hues gaze upon younger trainees who seem to have more zeal and vigor for what they were doing, more ambition whenever it came to debuting and what it consists of, it causes her to ponder upon how long would she last this time? would she be able to make it to debut, or would she find herself leaving the companies doors for a final time through her own will or the company’s?

it’s thoughts like this that keep her entranced, lost to the circumstances in her vicinity, and it’s why she doesn’t even notice shiah until lithe arms are around her frame. nana finds herself bouncing lightly at the surprise, but the embrace is welcomed and returned with a soft grin and warm atmosphere. “you say that like i’m twenty years older! besides with your status, i’m sure all the young ones will still go to you anyways,” the brunette chuckles. at the mention of a tour nana finds herself nodding while she releases the other, gratefulness etched within her features, “i mean, i did get one before but it wasn’t the shiah special. so ... was it even really a great tour? plus this place is so big that i’m going to need fifteen tours before i actually start memorizing places. i already got lost twice ...”

[rknvna]

♚┋❛ i'm feeling myself ,

it happens on one of the rare days when royal's food doesn't seem to be enough -- when the gray patterns decorating the walls turn bleak and the building seems more suffocating instead of stimulating.

nana has grown used to the bewildered stares of others thrown in her direction, wondering why a girl of her aesthetic and stature was seen alone while eating instead of surrounded by a pair of friends like the others. she pays them no mind -- the simple satisfaction of having the sun's rays kiss her skin while it's at its highest point, and feeling the last remains of summer course through her auburn locks like a soft touch was more than enough for this particular day. friends weren't really needed to appreciate the small things life.

moppy hair atop of a dazzling smile comes into her view on her way back to the entertainment building, stopping her with a polite call her way and a wave of his camera. i only need five minutes of your time, maybe ten tops he pleads as a video camera is now in her line of sight and nana obeys; halting in her spot only to come within a safe perimeter of the boy. "sure, how can i help you?"

i just need you to rap for me, if that's possible. whatever comes to your mind! and surprise reflects within the depths of mahogany hues -- widens the rims of her eyes and pushes a chuckle from her throat and past plush tiers. "are you serious?"

an impromptu beat seeps from the speakers of his iphone and he nods, frame swaying from one side to the other with the music as if to silently encourage her -- you got this! another laugh escapes her, eyes crinkling and a hand raised in front of her mouth as nana scours the area with her eyes. it was all so random, she thinks, and it takes her a couple of minutes to think of something decent enough to say on spot. "okay, okay," the girl lets out a warning of sorts, before the opportunity to jump in makes itself known and she's showing what these last couple of months of training has done for her and her skills.

tell your mom she can her man back, just for night she not gon' like when all the shit we did come to the light she know that my location on if she want to fight i'm more of a pacquiao of words, but if she's with it i'll bite

now wait; bet you weren't expecting bars to come from this face seductive eyes, long legs, and a cute little waist when did beauty not equal talent? why can't those interlace? just know i'm changing the name now, better call me your grace

i'm im jinah, im nana, now known as your leader don't step to me, don't test me, i don't want to read ya' better keep this for posterity, talent like this is a rarity take a minute to let this soak and give you better clarity

ooooh shit! comes from the boy when she ends and nana's lips pull into a grin, reveling in the astonished reaction that she draws from him -- all smiles and radiating energy. before she can dart back to the royal headquarters ( because time is ticking, after all ) he asks for her name, to which she obliges his request one last time.

"im nana -- remember that, because you'll be seeing my name in lights real soon!"

[rknvna]

hi hi!! i’m gonna make this quick and easy -- i’m desperate to get this girl more active, so i need more threads :c so please like this post if you wouldn’t mind plotting? i’ll hop over 2 ur ims asap, or you can add me on twitter ( @nanaesthetics ) for a faster response since i’m on all the time over there. i also have a massive plot page that you could look at, and atm i’m looking for some strong close friendships for her as well as some interesting relationships, and yeah ... please? o(╥﹏╥)o

[rknvna]

❤   💬   ➤ 820 likes

dashofnana   style is a reflection of your attitude and personality. ✨ —— view all 43 comments 1 HOUR AGO

[rknvna]

———  JUNE EVALUATION  ▸  FINAL CHALLENGE   ›  ›  ›  ›   SKILLS TESTED :  SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST VARIETY

her plan was simple: 

find the best place to hide

sit there for all of eternity

in the event that she was caught, offer them money

and generally, so far things were going pretty good.

nana thinks that most would hide in places that were obvious -- cafe, probably try to make their way to the rooftop terrace, underneath the desks in the recording rooms; places that would be the first to look if she were one of those who didn’t even bother to hide, those who were on the offense instead of defense. she thinks a little bit further than that, and instead makes her way out of the gated entrance and into the lobby, pleading with the front desk women to not think of her as weird as she crawls underneath the desk and attempts to make herself comfortable. others have similar ideas to her and she allows a smaller girl to take one of the open spaces near her, but together they shoo away several others that try to stake claim to their place -- a form of situational solidarity taking place between the two.

and for quite a bit, the plan is working well. several others come and look for people but try not to disturb the women while they do their jobs ( because guests and artists and others people don’t stop coming into the building while the trainees roam around like beasts in the wild ) and they don’t really think to look around them. nana remains in her place while the other girl scurries away after the third person comes in the room hunting, and she prays that the other doesn’t get snatched up in the process. godspeed.

she’s actually searching through her phone, comfortably liking instagram photos and silently laughing at dumb videos whenever ears pick up the sounds of light footsteps getting closer -- until she spots them in her vision and a girl with the smirk resembling that of the cheshire cat slowly appears. shit. 

chants of “no no no, you don’t want to do this!” come from nana but they go unheard, the older immediately slamming her back to the floor as she tries to push the other girl’s hands away from her body. “do you want some money? i’ll give you whatever i have in my pocket right now if you don’t tear my tag!” she tries to bargain amidst the scuffle, only the yell of “i’m rich!” gets the other to stop, giving nana enough time to pull out the bills with a number of zeroes behind them. “if you take it, you have to leave immediately and not tell anyone where i am located. you have to promise me!” she says, and lights up whenever the other accepts with a nod of her head and does as she’s told, disappearing within a couple of seconds after pocketing the cash. “unnies, you too,” the woman throws towards those seated at the front desk, who chuckle but eventually also accept what’s given their way as well. 

so as she sneaks her way back into her hiding spot, she prays that the girl will hopefully keep her word. if not, then she will probably have to find a new place soon enough.

[rknvna]

———  JUNE EVALUATION  ▸  PREPARATION    ›  ›  ›  ›   LOCATION :  ROYAL PRACTICE ROOM

the woman was hoping that this month’s evaluation would be better than the last -- but apparently, royal had other plans.

nana’s ability to entertain comes to a halt after she leaves the stage, and she finds herself at a loss when it comes to being funny off the basis of her personality -- maybe whenever she’s comfortable with someone, possibly. but nana is someone who is quite aware of her strengths and weaknesses, and the ability to make someone laugh was far from a strength. it wasn’t like she didn’t possess some talents of her own -- dancing, designing -- but they weren’t all that interesting to show to the public, if at all.

and maybe this evaluation was worse than the last because it preys upon one of her insecurities -- that she’s nothing without her beauty. that once you get past her looks, get used to them, you will see that her personality doesn’t excite others enough to stick around. so how was she supposed to even be decent at variety when she couldn't even entertain others in her personal life?

so whenever free time is available, nana spends it researching -- finding out what other idols do to make themselves shine in that area, seeing what she could copy for a personal skill. there’s a lot of behavior that nana sees that seems kind of cringey, others who seemed like they were trying too hard for attention, a lot of which made her uncomfortable to even attempt to try out. she wasn’t the type that would make herself look like a fool for a laugh, and she would be easily called out if she tried to fake her way through something. with emotions it was easy, but trying to be something she wasn’t -- that was a completely different ballpark.

so maybe she was a lost cause.

phone slides across the floor in frustration, a soft whine seeping past her lips while digits slide into her hair, gripping her head as the room stills in silence. something like this shouldn't be so hard and yet here she is, agonizing and clearly overthinking something that shouldn’t be such a struggle. 

so she decides to rise to her feet, gathering her things before texting her driver to come pick her up from training. maybe she would find a portable pole and show them some kind of simple pole trick, regardless if it was actually allowed or not. all she did know is that she was tired of thinking about this.