|Anna|30|So-Cal babey|They let me be a doctor which is pretty fucked up|I've been on this hellsite for 11 slutty, slutty years main blog for @doctorweebmd
I doodled fanart for your bkdk fics in history class a few years ago, and to this day they are still the best pieces of fanfiction I have EVER read!! Your incredible writing inspired me and others in a lot of ways, so thank you. I do wonder though, how are you able to write such long and detailed pieces without losing interest and/or your sanity? Also, is there a certain character dynamic that you particularly enjoy when it comes to fictional relationships?
the fanart in question(don’t look at the hands.)
alsdk;fjasd;lkfjakls;djf;lkasfej
AHHHH oh my goodddd i love love love love them oh my gosh literally the first picture took me to that scene with picture-perfect clarity and poor Ochako's expression!!! And vacation shirt!!! And Inko is ROCKING it the MILF treatment she deservesss
and morgan!!! and interstella!!! AHHHH oh my gosh i love love love love this so much like literally i can't express it they were my first two stories in the fandom and they feel so rough and sometimes a little embarassing to be honest but i love them so much and your art has made me so happy!! honestly thank you so much for sharing this was such an unexpected treat and I'm just BEAMING
honest answers to your questions under the cut because i am (as you already know) a bit long-winded lmao:
re: writing long pieces without losing interest/sanity; honestly? for me personally it was figuring out that perfectionism and inattention was preventing me finishing anything and, honestly, gaining any skill in writing. because i could never FINISH a story, i just kept re-writing intro chapters or obsessing over specific things about characters/events. and like a lot of readers/lurkers i HATED unfinished fics so i insisted on only ever posting something that got finished. which. well. almost NEVER happened.
intersecting lines came from pure manic inspiration but depending on an intangible LOVE for a story to just GRIP you to that degree is just not realistic. theres a thinkpiece i read at one point about photography saying 'if you only take photos when you have a muse you'll take very few photos and when the muse hits again you won't have gained the skills to take the photos you want' and to be honest the same thing goes for writing (or art! or music! or literally anything!)
getting over myself and understanding what stops me from fleshing out stories (perfectionism, short attention span, insecurity, fear of rejection) has really pushed my writing forward a LOT. for one now i post chapter by chapter on ao3 because otherwise i get stuck in editing hell or constantly re-writing things. plus it gives the instant gratification of 'finishing something' in a short term without delaying it for months/years or stressing yourself out that a project is 'too big' to start because its going to take a year. one piece, one chapter, one corner, one SOMETHING at a time and it all adds up ya know?
two accountability is important to me - writing for myself is one thing but i'm fine with disappointing myself; but if i post a chapter and smuthut69 on ao3 is looking forward to the next one then YEAH i'll do it for them! three challenge yourself with different mediums - its not just a story idea that keeps me engaged, but a particular technique/genre/style. for 'my brother's keeper' i didn't have a plan but thought it would be fun to do alternating POVs/porn/humor and that kept the story going even when I had no idea where i was going with it.
but also like i complain CONSTANTLY about writing long-fic lmao it suckkkssss and yet like. getting into doing it consistently six years ago has been one of the best parts of my stupid life. so.
re: fictional dynamics i really enjoy exploring - i'm a little obvious but definitely narrative foils. i love exploring relationships between characters that are diametrically opposed and seem like they have nothing in common and how they address certain challenges, situations, how they grow to understand one another. i enjoy conflict and tension and catharsis in stories which is definitely why i gravitate towards rivals or pairs that really seem to be incompatible/have very opposing views/philosophies. i just think its fun.
ANYWAY. sorry for the yapping but this made my day your art is gorgeous and thank you so so much for sharing!
As you can imagine, those who had fallen this far had been so worn down by their tortures in the seven other hells that they no longer had the strength to cry out.
HELLO! I know it’s been like 3 years since you’ve written anything about bkdk and ur an EFFING DOCTOR WTF! but i just finished zero sum (so amazing omf genuinely tweaking out) and was wondering 1. if u would ever write for bkdk again! and 2. any writing tips on how to become a better writer/ tips for story boarding cuz the quirk mechanics in ZSG were so well thought out
THANK UUUUU
hello!!! so so sweet of you to reach out :) i appreciate that you liked zsg and also like SO surprised that anyone is still reading it like three years out LMAO reading it for the first time now that the manga is done and the anime is finishing up must be an EXPERIENCE like that shit makes 0% sense AND. AND. i stand by it 100% true bnha ending
BUT! to answer your question
1.) ahhh honestly i dont think i will write for bkdk again. never say never and all that but i dont really have any more stories to tell; i definitely dont think i'll ever write another long-fic for them, although one-shots or short-and-silly things are not out of the question. hoenstly there's so many other (and better!) authors still writing for them and they definitely deserve the world; i've kinda outlived my utility in the fandom lmao but am very very grateful for the years of joy its given me and the stories it helped me write! i truly love zsg more than anything else i've ever written and it will forever hold a special place in my heart
2.) i dont know if there are good/consistent writing tips to follow, especially for an amateur like me! i think the most obvious is like, keep writing. keep reading. you will see yourself get better and your craft become stronger the more you do it. like its VERY obvious there's a huge skill difference between intersecting lines an zero sum game but i didn't do anything special other than keep writing, read other's works and think about what i love about them, and try to write/practice things i'm uncomfortable with!
re: the storyboarding for quirk mechanics in zsg - i write things out, honestly. try to take something canon and expand on it as much as you can! i took the 'shigaraki seeing into izuku's mindscape' and AFO/OFA being positioned as direct and opposite quirks of each other and tried to explain it. honestly the math is probably/definitely not right and i dont think 99.9% of people check but it still make it really fun and interesting. the most fun is taking a concept and trying to see how it fits into canon - any scientific concept or NON scientific concept! for example thinking 'okay if the bnha kids were in a band, who would be in a band and which instruments would they play?' its the same as 'oh if quirks worked like electricity, what would be equal to this factor and this factor?' its a fun exercise and it doesn't have to be perfect - just thinking about different scenarios and how canon fits into it/around it i think is always an amazing piece of inspiration!
but either way, thank you thank you for reading zsg and for messaging :) it truly means the world to me!!!
Hiiiii I left you a comment on the newest chapter of everything in halves and then decided that wasn’t enough so I’m coming over HERE to be annoying and tell you that ‘he can trust Oda,’ and “Now that we are working together, I suppose I should learn your name. How should I address you?” And “he could be dangerous,” ARE GOING TO LIVE IN MY HEAD FOR AGES. I’ve been WHEEZING like there’s something wrong with me. Lucy coming in with the finger-pointing. Atsushi why are you the way that you are, too gay to brain. Dazai the Disaster-man. AKUTAGAWA IS BEAUTIFUL AND I LOVE HIM. R A N P O—
And I have to ask, do you have a favorite part of this chapter?
why are you soooooooo kindddddddd a;ldfjalk;sdjf URGH I DONT DESERVE IT BUT ALSO YESS YESSSSSS NO TAKEBACKSIES I WILL BE RANTING
First of all, I like this chapter a LOT. It marks a completion of the exposition - the scene is set, crumbs of foreshadowing have been dropped, and all that's left is to ramp up the drama. It was incredibly hard to write, but I'm pretty happy with the results!
Now, on to my favorites:
The cemetery scene with Dazai is number one, of course. I love what it reveals about Dazai specifically, and how much it throws him off that BEAST!Akutagawa is the way he is.
A part of it is purely superficial. Out of everyone Dazai's known in his life, Akutagawa is purely and unquestionably loyal to him and only him. In my opinion I think Dazai did that on purpose - I think he selected Akutagawa specifically to groom him. Make him his secret weapon, with little fealty to the Port Mafia. Maybe it was as part of his ploy to take down Mori, eventually Maybe it was something else. Either way, the other people in Dazai's life - Chuuya, Ango, Kunikida - care about him, sure.
But they would not follow his orders without question. They are not blind to who he is. Akutagawa is.
So when he meets an Akutagawa who not only despises him, but sees through his bullshit and refuses to play into his games, he truly does not know how to act.
Its like, you have a friend that is absolutely in love with you, and adore you even though you don't feel the same way. Then that friend suddenly moves on - doesn't treat you different, doesn't prioritize you, doesn't want you anymore - and suddenly that loss is magnanimous. Suddenly you'd do anything for them to look your way, even though you never wanted them until they no longer wanted you.
So the gut-punch after gut-punch Dazai must be experiencing right now has me kicking my feet and twirling my hair. This Akutagawa ignores him, chooses to protect Oda over indulging him, literally does not even know his name. And, just like someone being rejected, I think it actually endears Dazai to him, which is a mindfuck for the poor guy all on its own.
That also flows in a little into Atsushi's role in this chapter. While he shows up pretty briefly, his rejection of BEAST!Akutagawa when the others so readily accept him is a major plot point and ends up being an important part of our conflict and growth. He's also wrapped a little bit in the same bullshit Dazai is in.
He had been Akutagawa's singular point of interest for fuck knows how long. No matter who else is around (unless its Dazai of course,) Atsushi is the sole object of Akutagawa's attention. He's the only one that poses a challenge to him. The only one that can match him. The only one that can merge their abilities together. Akutagawa is Atsushi's burden to bear and, like a good detective, he """puts up with""" it.
Imagine his surprise when Akutagawa shows up and straight up ignores him. Avoids working with him. Doesn't even look at him. And its not like he ever ASKED to be the center of Akutagawa's attention, but now that he's not, it bothers him. It bothers him even more that no one seems to care that their Akutagawa is gone and has been replaced with some stranger.
I'm a little enamored with the I didnt realize how much I cared about you until you were gone trope. Except he's not gone, its still him, isn't it?
NOTABLE RUNNER UP SCENES:
The scene where Lucy tries to threaten him in the cafe. BEAST!Akutagawa is a fan of honesty and bravery, and Lucy's got both in spades. Is there an unlikely friendship brewing, perhaps??? I'd love to see Akutagawa in Anne's Room. Oh he would SO dig it.
Also the scene with Ranpo immediately coming to Akutagawa's defense. I hadn't planned for it initially, but after having written it, I'm a little obsessed. They're both blunt and observant, they both aren't well versed in social norms, they both have no idea how to ride a train. I also think that out of everyone, Ranpo is the least likely to let feelings about Original!Akutagawa bleed into how he treats BEAST!Akutagawa. Ranpo barely looks at faces anyway, all he knows is this is a different dude and he's very, very useful. I'm excited to see how their dynamic plays out.
WOW I"M SORRY. WHY IS THIS SO LONG. THANK YOU FOR SAYING THIS MY BRAIN-WORMS ARE BRAIN-WORMING. I'm kissing you on the mouth pleaseee i WILL overexplain if you endulge me i'm so sorry
Oh my goodness! Aaaaaaa oh my god!! I love your works! Please I am a fan! Oh my gooodddddddd
I have read Battle of the Bands, Zero-sum Game, and my Brother's Keeper, and Fool's Gold many times 🥹😭 I still read them every quarter hahahaha when my roadtripwithlucifer-fics need happens.
I hope you know that I love the way you write, I love your stories and how detailed and creative they are 😭😭😭
Thank you so much for all of them!
I also love your Deku and Kacchan in Fools Gold so much 😂 🧡 💚
Wait seriously?! 🫣🫣🫣 oh my gosh thank you so much?! Quarterly?!?! That’s so wild I was literally looking through the bkdk tag and saw your drabbles and found them super charming lmao we are seriously ships in the night…
BUT AHHH I promise I’m going to get back to Fools Gold as soon as I’m done with my current project 🤦♀️ I miss their silly goofy time and we were just getting to the spicy part too… alas
Thank you so so so much for reading my stuff!!! I am so flattered and appreciate you so so much!! 🥰😍🥰😍🥰😍🥰
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