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The Memory - Chapter 7
The Memory – Chapter 7
Chapter 7 “Hello, Robert?” the voice came from over my shoulder I, and as I turn around in my seat, I am greeted by an average height man with glasses. He is also wearing a mask, something we all should be doing but they are rather lenient on surprisingly. Either way I greet him with a half-hearted smile. “Hello.” “Do you have a minute to talk? Over here…
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The Memory - Chapter 6
The Memory – Chapter 6
Chapter 6 The faint sound of phone ringing causes me to wake up from a deep sleep. Within seconds I realize that something does not appear right, and as my eyes adjust to the night, I see that I am no longer in the cold cell, but I am in what I think maybe a hotel room of sort. In the confusion, I jump out of bed and rush to the window to see what is happening. From my window, I see…
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The Memory - Chapter 5
The Memory – Chapter 5
Chapter 5 Negotiation time. Think quick but think slow enough to process every word. Rebuttal when needed and hold your tongue when needed as well. This will be difficult for many reasons now because if either of us think with emotion, the game can truly be lost forever. This confrontation will test everything for the both of us. Are we truly capable of fighting for our beliefs? He…
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The Memory - Chapter 4
The Memory – Chapter 4
Chapter 4 Tonight, will be the night we achieve freedom finally. As long everything goes according to plan. Part 1 was flawless. The rats have eaten Madame Magnolia and her two helpers, killing them slowly. Violet is still shaken by the horrific scene; I stay busy trying to keep her calm. Rebecca and Sarah are doing the same with the other girls. Time for part 2. With the key in hand,…
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This is Me Trying - A Poem
This is Me Trying – A Poem
Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Can they hear me? Am I skinny enough for you Pretty and thin for you Only when you thin You will be forever adored People will hold the doors For you Wait on hand any feet For you Well they use too The internet spread a lie A virus this time Fucked up my mind Thin is pretty That’s all i wanted to be But this is me trying Look in the mirror And…
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Looking In The Mirror - A Poem
Looking In The Mirror – A Poem
Looking in the mirror I see a perfectly imperfect kid Sitting in the corner With the heart of fire Shining bright but playing dull He had to let it go I wish him well Looking in the mirror I see a family full of love With a dysfunctional side A past of pain Scattered through the life of the kids They are innocent But they don’t know better I hope they are well today Looking in the…
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The Memory - Chapter 3
The Memory – Chapter 3
Chapter 3 Use what I remember about them. Use what I remember about them. Use what I remember about them. I just keep repeating these words over and over praying for a clue. Sir Daniel does not have any hints, and after what has felt like hours of probing for more answers, I am left with still no idea as to what that truly means. I remember them all so well. Violet with her dark hair and…
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The Memory - Chapter 2
The Memory – Chapter 2
Chapter 2 I grabbed The Key and within a second the bedroom I was in started to crumble around me. The room folding and crumbling almost like paper slowly burning. Reality was leaving, warping into an image it would prefer, yet it left me just as confused as before. How is all this even happening? We were all still in the same spot. Daniel, his army, the Candle, myself. We were all just…
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The Memory - Chapter 1
The Memory – Chapter 1
Chapter 1 It 4am, and the phone rings causing me to wake up form a deep sleep. Within seconds I realize that something does not appear right. As I slowly start to see a bit better, after my eyes adjust to the night, I see that I am no longer in the cold cell, but I am in a bedroom. In the confusion I jump out of bed and rush to the window to see what I happening. From my window I see…
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You Must Become and Island
You Must Become and Island
You must become an island. That line from the Sara Bareilles song always hits me in a hard, and different way. To me, an island is on its own meaning it must be independent and self-sufficient. Now, in modern day, all islands are connected via a bridge or boat (now this is an over generalization, but the idea is still the same) so no island must be alone or truly independent. This metaphor always…
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All Due to Me?
All Due to Me?
“I have worked at a few different jobs, and at each one I said I was bullied out of it due to harassment by my managers. I swear it happened, but was it truly as intense as I claim? I guess we will never know. It is my word against theirs, and when it comes to every story there are 3 parts. The truth, mine, and theirs. That does not invalidate any story because in the end both points…
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Memories: Bullying
Bullying is the one thing that can turn even the strongest of people into someone so feeble and self-conscious. It can make someone do some of the most idiotic things, that will only ever make sense to the victim. Below is a LARGE snippet from my book to give a more inside look as to me being affected by bullying. After that, I will tell 2 more recent stories I have remembered, both from back…
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Looking to the Future
Looking to the Future
Where do I begin. I keep telling you about my past, with good reason because I know I should get help, and I work on that every day. I work on trying to obtain that idea of self-love, but the work you need to put in is not easy and at times very difficult. This can take years to find that moment of self-love. For some people that could mean medication, for others that could be talk therapy. For…
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To My Dear Brother,
To My Dear Brother,
Cute, you have a problem with me, and you always have. You are the most pathetic person I sadly have to call family. You will use everyone as a scapegoat to deflect your own problems, then you will get mad when you call you out on your BS. You are truly pathetic. You are no brother of mine and you are not even a part of my family, and I can easily say that because you feel the same already. You…
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What I Want for My Birthday
What I Want for My Birthday
All I want is for my parents to actually love and accept me as transgender. I have been fighting for this since 2017, and at this point if I can’t transition I just want to die. I have tried and tried and they don’t seem to care about who I am and my mental state. It is always about them and how they will be viewed. Who cares what people think about them! I wish they would finally care about how…
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The Doctor
If you bought my book, you may already know this story, but I wanted to share it again here because it is important. Life is messy, and sometimes, even the ones you love can make things worse. That is the case with this reflection upon my past. Now, at the time I wrote this, just think about what happened would trigger horrible anxiety, and would even cause me to pass out altogether. This was a…
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Looking In the Mirror
Looking In the Mirror
When I got my copy of the book, I looked back and saw it was ending abruptly on a sad note, where it felt as if I never really healed. I wanted to make it clear that have flaws, and just because I am on medication does not mean the world will be all rainbows and unicorns. Life can still be shitty, and it will remain that way so long as I hate what is in the mirror. Every time I look in the…
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