hi i exist sometimes

you expect a description of "me"? buddy do "i" have multiple news for you

[oneheadtoanother]

[escuerzoresucitado]

[foone]

My robot GF runs windows 95 so this is very easy. Hell, sometimes we don't even make it to the sex before I'm having to ctrl-alt-delete her.

[foone]

fun fact: why I wrote this shitpost, I had a windows 95 VM running upstairs on my computer. I didn't know it at the time, but it had already bluescreened.

[foone]

NSFW

[guerrillatech]

[despazito]

I hope that little german boy is still playing fortnite und trinking cola

[fadingpeacedogg]

[bigstupiduglyogre]

[dearpercocet]

Gender affirming surgery of give me elf ears

[dearpercocet]

Gender affirming surgery of give me vampire fangs

[dearpercocet]

Gender affirming surgery of give me teifling horns

[sirmalican]

congratulations you are now a homestuck troll

[dearpercocet]

This is the worst possible reply to this post have a horrible day

[thatsparrow]

i know this is how the vampire survivors secret is phrased, but out of context, this is incredibly fucking funny to see as the title of a steam thread

[jb-blunk]

What people don’t get is when you comment on a post on here you’re not talking to an audience or to generalized presence or the void the way you are when making a post on here, you are talking directly to the person who made the post, to me. you are plopping down onto my lap slinging your arms around my neck looking into my eyes and saying whatever you just said bc it is my post and I am the only one getting an alert about it. You are speaking to me. And I’m going to murder you.

[ailuromantic-deactivated2022122]

nobody tears through library books quite as fast as a 12 yr old girl with no friends

[ailuromantic-deactivated2022122]

only ppl on this post who matter r the ppl who r saying "me except im not a girl anymore" & "me except i wasnt a girl yet"

[aropride]

my brain every single night deciding what to think about

[canisbeta]

animal sniffing something: hm….. object. woagh

[catasters]

[valtsv]

Why are you problematic

just for fun

[tinfoilvalentine]

metal gear characters will be named shit like penis delirious 

[tinfoilvalentine]

metal gear characters will be named shit like penis delirious and have three clones called penis serious penis mysterious and penis imperious

[leolaroot]

heh.... he doesn't know about .. my Instant Pounding Headache technique....! *stands up too fast* *screams in agony*

[kiyomimooon]

does anyone else completely ignore the queue option on tumblr. i’m here when i’m here

[sweatermuppet]

they should invent a myself that isn't at its limit