street over smart

  Living in the garden of evil, Screwed up, scared, doing anything that I needed.  

[rolandcrum]

graymonroe:

grayson’s blood was BOILING. he didn’t get the chance to voice his ( very strong ) opinions to his father just hours earlier, so he couldn’t help but let all the pent up rage flow out as he was meeting with his brother face to face. this was a man who could potentially ruin gray’s life, after all — maybe not on such an extreme level, but this was ripping him of his normalcy nonetheless. having a secret half brother who happened to live in your state definitely wasn’t mundane, by any means ; this was the kind of shit people go on talk shows for, go viral on facebook for, that sort of thing. so to the brunette, a slight dent thrown into his life completely devastated him. especially when there were so many unanswered questions …. questions that would remain unanswered, because the only person who he could seek out has been gone for years now. 

give the guy a break for being a little dramatic here. he felt like he was about to walk in front of a dr. phil live audience.

much too exhausted to let any tears spill ( although, boy, did he want to ), grayson ran both of his hands over his face, shaking his head & turning around sharply when roland addressed him again.❝ do you really think that i would come out here, dead ass in the middle of the goddamn night, to fuck with you ? do you think i’m five ? ❞ he could only wish that he was able to fuck with him right now.❝ i don’t want to be here, roland. in fact, i’d rather be half way across the fucking country at this point — but my father hooked up with your mother, & i really don’t want your existence to eat at me for the rest of my life, alright ? ❞ he had a feeling that roland’s neighbors were less than pleased with him right about now, but it was their lucky night, because he wasn’t done yet.❝ so, i’m sorry i interrupted your beauty sleep, but i need you to use your brain for two fucking seconds & stop asking stupid questions. i’m not playing with you. ❞

Admittedly all of it felt a little too surreal. Nobody just comes up to anyone’s door and confronts them for being their brother. At least Roland thought so, before he was placed into the scenario. His mother never wanted to speak about his father, she’d always address him as a piece of shit, or a various of the phrase. For a long time, Roland yearned to know about his father, he wanted to understand where he came from. But after awhile of never having the ability to, he just started to feel hurt, rejected, and all of the above. It wasn’t fair that some guy could avoid the responsibility for all of this damage. 

So he couldn’t understand why some privileged kid was bothering him in the middle of the night. Life hadn’t treated Roland with velvet gloves, but he could only assume from the way this guy was acting that he didn’t have a single hiccup in his privileged existence. At least he had the father Roland always lacked. “I can’t tell when you’re acting like you’re five. You’re throwing a fit because you just found out your daddy wasn’t perfect, aren’t you?” Roland quipped bitterly as he scoffed. “Okay, so do you want me apologize for being born? What the fuck do you want from me, dude? I’m not gonna ruin your perfect fucking life anymore than I already have. You don’t have to worry about hearing from me ever. I don’t even wanna know your dad. He’s dead to me as far as I’m concerned.” Roland snapped, not able to control his temper at his point. “What do you want from me? What? I don’t get it. I really don’t. Shit like this happens all the time. Especially when there’s guys like your dad involved.”

[gdibellona-blog]

She turned her back to the other person, having just gotten off the phone with her mother, and rubbed her eyes almost tiredly. They wanted her home, and she was nowhere near ready to going home just yet. “I can feel you caring back there…” She mumbled, subtly wiping her eyes.

[rolandcrum]

“Yeah uh -- you okay? I don’t wanna butt in or anything.” Roland awkwardly gestured as he bounced the weight back and forth on his feet.

[rolandcrum]

jodiewests:

“Yes, yes indeed there is. If one day I woke up in an alternate reality where cheese did not exist, I would kill myself, straight up,” she scoffed, throwing up her hands. “Hm. Well, maybe you’re not wrong,” Jodie teased, grinning against his cheek. “That’s funny. Why would you be jealous?” Maybe it seemed an odd thing to say, but she was genuinely curious. From where she was standing, he had nothing to be jealous of. “With Kyle? God no. I’m not that self-loathing. – Because I miss you too. I always do.”

“Don’t even joke about that. There’s more important things than cheese. Such as... coffee, and alcohol.” Roland explained with a shrug. “And just what is that supposed to mean?” Although he had an idea of what it meant. “Uh... if it’s not obvious, I still have feelings for you. I always will, you know? You were my first love. It meant something to me.” He admitted as he averted his gaze. “Was Kyle an asshole? -- You do not, cut it out.”

[rolandcrum]

evieliudrew:

“I have indeed, and you should be. You’ve got to hope for the best, even in the darkest of times.”

“Impressive. That’s a lot easier said than done. Especially for such a mopey ass like myself.”

[rolandcrum]

☆ what's your biggest regret

“Usually I would say passing up the opportunity to go into the service, but I think -- never fixing things with my ex girlfriend. I wasted so many years being too stubborn to actually just be with her. It’s a really shitty feeling.”

[rolandcrum]

jodiewests:

“Um, hello. Cheesy pizza? Grilled cheese? Mozzarella sticks? Mac and cheese? My god, man. Have yourself some pride,” Jodie groaned, nearly throwing a peanut shell at him. Then her cheeks flushed, and she shook her head. “Am I?” Yes, she was. It was clear by the way she nudged him with her nose, although that was less sexual and more of something else. “Stop! It’s really not a big deal, I’m so over it. You’re sweet to try and take care of me, though. I guess some things never change,” she nodded. “Like not together?“ For a long pause of a moment, she stilled, and then shook her head. “It’s not dumb.” Then she kissed him again.

Rolling his eyes, he shook his head. “Okay, maybe some of those but there’s no need in being so obsessed, is there? I have plenty of pride, too much probably.” He said with a shrug, trying to dodge her peanut shell. “Kinda seems that way.” Roland said before pressing his nose back against hers. “Maybe I’m just jealous as hell of anyone you’re with. Some things never do change, like that.” He tried to say nonchalantly. “So like hooking up?” A pang in his chest started. “No? Why not?” Roland sighed quietly before cupping her cheek, lingering the kiss.

[rolandcrum]

☆ + if you could live inside any fictional verse, which would you pick?

“I’d say either Game Of Thrones or Star Wars.”

[roleplaymmemes]

Send me ☆ + a question and my muse will have to answer it truthfully with absolute honesty

[rolandcrum]

averysimmcns:

“Oh yes, just take my job why don’t you? I’m feeling better about myself already and all thanks to you.” She wasn’t lying either, because he had valid points. “You wouldn’t be a problem for me. If you’re okay with me sitting here and speaking to you about my issues, then why would you think i’d have a problem?” she asks in response. 

“And I don’t even have a college degree. What a miracle.” He mused as he shook his head. “I suppose because I don’t like to open up much to anyone. If I say too much they could be judging me or thinking I don’t make any sense about how I feel, you know that kinda thing.”

[rolandcrum]

evieliudrew:

“Oh yes, you should know that in kindergarten my teacher’s praised me for my excellent pincer grip. I like how you think.”

“So you’ve even got pinch credentials. I’m officially shaking in my boots. I appreciate that, not a lot of people do.”

[rolandcrum]

fckjayde:

“I said it. I was dragging myself, I do that – it’s called being self-aware.” She’d chuckled slightly under her breath, a light shrug decorating her shoulders as she tucked her wallet back into her purse. “No. I am just informing you that it may be possible to do so. It is my duty to make sure you do not get too self-important, you know.”

“Is that what that is? Maybe I’m too self aware these days.” He quipped before looking away. Taking off the apron around his waist, he tossed it aside before grabbing his sunglasses. “Keeping me humble, I get it. I would be sad if you ever did decide to replace me, you know. You’re the only one to ever slap sense into me.”

[sterolinefans]

[rolandcrum]

fckjayde:

“Mhm, I will pretend to keep that in mind for future reference. Though, I am not actually going to since I am a relatively selfish creature and if I were to just kind of silently let my rants about people’s ignorance go unspoken I might actually be rather hostile. I may be rigid as fuck, but pugnacious? Not quite.” She’d somewhat pretended to sneer, but was otherwise clearly content to wait for him to be able to clock out. “Oh? I mean, I do have Luca – though he is mister sunshine perfect human being so it’s less fun to be judgmental in his presence. Erin would possibly be a willing saltmate if need be.” 

“You’ve got a good point, my friend. You better tell me all of your rants because I wouldn’t wanna see that fester into something. Nobody ever said that, don’t turn this into me dragging you.” He teased before turning around and logging onto the bar’s system. “Are you thinking of replacing me? I’m hurt.” 

[rolandcrum]

evieliudrew:

“I’ll do my best, but I’ll warn you, I have a nasty pinch. You could be right, it may be too late.”

“Oh, now are you gonna make me scared of your pinch? Because I might be. Let’s just hope we aren’t. We gotta have faith even if that’s difficult.” 

[rolandcrum]

jodiewests:

“Because I fuckin’ love cheese, Rolly! Don’t knock it. You’re the only one making this completely pure and untouched union weird,” she smiled. “Is that so?” Jodie raised her brows, nearly wiggling them at him. “I could make you a winner,” she said suggestively, giggling softly against his shoulder. “Hm? Oh. His name was Kyle, I’m pretty sure you never met him. Yeah, well. I don’t know. It just seemed easier to kind of coast. I don’t mind it. Most people are better as friends, anways,” Jo pointed out. “Hey-y.” A blush crept on her face. “You can’t say stuff like that, I’ll think you mean it and then I’m gonna get excited.”

“I like cheese on my burgers, and on my nachos. Anywhere else is kinda weird.” He mused with a shrug. “Yeah, actually.” Shooting her a confused look, suddenl he realized it was meant more suggestive. “Are you coming onto me?” Roland asked with an arched brow. “Kyle, I’ll blacklist him from this bar. I’ll black every Kyle in Seattle. -- So like when you mean friends how do you mean?” He quietly berated, realizing anything could just set off his jealousy. Letting out a breath, he kissed her temple. “Maybe that’s what I’m hoping for. I miss you, I don’t know. Is that dumb?”

[rolandcrum]

averysimmcns:

He had a point, but only if he knew all the sorrow and the pain her family had caused other families. It wasn’t just one person, it was all those people she couldn’t help. “I suppose I can just do better.” is all she states before taking a sip from her club soda. As he spoke up about his goals, Avery looked up at him and could only empathize in a sense. He felt trapped and she understood that, because that’s how she had felt. “Is there no one that can help you?” she asks. If he wanted to do something, she was sure he could try, there had to be a way he could continue doing what he wanted to, couldn’t he?

“Can’t we all? That’s life, though. Learning to improve ourselves, or whatever. I’m no expert.” He teased, eyeing her. Shrugging, Roland never asked for help -- not if he could help it. It was a downfall, he was well aware of. “I wouldn’t wanna bog anyone down with my problems when we all got ‘em.” 

[rolandcrum]

erinwillixms:

She nods in response because in that moment she did. Probably because he was standing right there to distract her, or she would have just used her phone to do the inevitable. “I know!” she adds in exasperation when he points out the fact that it would be a mistake, because that’s exactly what it would be. “Do you have any idea how many times i’ve been texting nonsense in a drunken stupor? I feel bad for Milo, I mean i’m pretty sure I once texted him, telling him that the boy next to me is a lollipop and we all know where that could lead to.” she shakes her head, mainly at herself for such embarrassing texts. “just to clarify, no one was licked.” she added in an attempt to clear the confusion. “And then I texted my crush once asking if he was a good cuddler, but that’s so lame because who does that??!” she asks. When he mentioned his ex, Erin raised a brow, “Please tell me more about you and your love life. I will not judge at all, maybe we can help each other out and advise each other–if you want a slightly intoxicated person’s opinion.” she adds, which was another way of telling him that she was interested. And she truly was, not because she was nosy, but because if she couldn’t help herself, then maybe she’d be able to help him out or at least advise him.

Roland desperately wished he could actually take the advice he gave. Considering he had too many drunk calls to random people, much of which never made sense. Placing a hand over his mouth, he muffled a chuckle. “A lollipop? That’s actually really funny. I’m sure your friend doesn’t mind. If I got drunken texts like those I’d probably end up framing them.” He teased lightly as he grabbed an empty glass off the bar top. “No? Are you positive about that?” Roland eyed her curiously. “I think we all do that. I’m even guilty of it sadly.” He said with a sigh, shaking his head. Nodding, he placed his palms flat in front of him. “Yeah, that’d be really nice. I have this ex who is totally the opposite of who I am. Bubbly, makes jokes, always supportive. You know. I broke up with her before I left to join the military, but since I never joined I’ve never been able to mend things with her because of -- pride, I guess.” Roland explained as he rolled his eyes at his own self.