“Okay, I know I told you I’m an alien and everything but I swear to god if you try to get me to say ‘greetings earthling’ I will punch you. Of course no one says that! What is this an ‘80s film!”
There’s this new kid in my school and they’re pretty weird. Not the cliche kind of weird, as in they actually don’t know how to fully operate as a human being and I think they might be an alien.
“What am I if I fall in love with a being from a different planet? … No, i’m just wondering of course.”
“Uhm, hey, long story short I’m not from around here and there are people (with guns) chasing after me please please please let me hide in your house?”
“I don’t know what would’ve been worse, me finding a bear in my kitchen at 4AM eating all my food or a cute alien eating all my food at 4AM.”
“Are all humans this cute?”
“I got hunted down and dragged out of hiding and now I’m in some scary lab (pretty sure I’m about to be dissected) but just before the operation this scientist came in to check everything was alright, wait what you’re unhooking me from the machine now we’re running away out of the science lab. man, maybe humans aren’t that shitty afterall.”
“We crashlanded on Earth and despite being rivals we’re too scared to think straight and we keep clinging onto each other for dear life, oh god those humans think we’re a couple, quick you zogloid kiss me before they realise anythi— damn, you actually did it.”
“You’re my alien friend and I’ve decided to run you through all the human things you don’t understand, starting with films. I decided to pick Star Trek and I can’t get over the fact how you’re so fixated on the screen and characters, omg you’re adorable.”
(Alternatively) “You’re my alien friend and I’ve decided to run you through all the human things you don’t understand, starting with films. I decided to pick Star Trek and honestly I’m about to lose it because all you’ve been doing throughout the whole film is rant about how it’s so inaccurate and how that would never happen and watching you get so (adorably) angry about it is a lot more entertaining that watching the film.”
“I was meant to only come to Earth to get information about humans so my race could figure out how to dominate the planet but I think I’m falling in love with my test subject, shit.”
“I don’t understand human emotions or motives but who the sparax made you cry I’m GOING TO HUNT THEM DOWN AND KILL THEM — too much?”
“I was always taught that humans were really horrible creatures, but something must be wrong with your DNA because you’re the most adorable, funny human I’ve ever seen… did I say that outloud?”
“Dude, just because I come from a different planet doesn’t mean I can’t understand English. Yes this does mean I did understand that comment you made about my butt.”
dailybridgerton
andulkaphoto
yousharknotpass
ellievsbear
prguitarman
theartofmadeline
janainaart
annaxmalina
vaporwave
dededos
snowghoul
