“I waited for him for so long and he would not, did not come.
And at first it made me cry, yes it did make me numb…
How come,
I ask…
In a flash, I could experience a love that made me experience incarnations life times long,
And then almost in an instant, it was gone….
And then, once more, there was no home.
It was a nostalgia that mimicked de ja vu,
The both, wrapped in two, In summery- mid Spring, melodic hues, and tunes, I knew that he felt familiar, that I had sailed across oceans to find him, to be with him again, and he had died, and been reborn into the souls of unfamiliar men - just to lay beside me again.
In whatever form we chose..
But we always arose with the dawn, and made sure that by the morn, we had found one another.
The pain every time that we separated felt like sweet death all over again, and at the time I wished exactly for sweet death, physical death to sweep me off my feet, to put an end to my defeat, to submerge me in waters ocean deep - for I could not sleep, I could only stand to mourn, to weep, for a lover who no longer wanted me…
I cried a cry that clenched my chest, I did my very best, I said my prayers with zest, and all the rest… But to no avail,
A sorrowful tale,
I say why it is just a test, a trial, upon numerous trials - to bring me to the best version of me, to taste redemption, the likes of which I had never seen.
Such a great, great sacrifice,
To lose him once again in this life, this time, not to war, or famine, or strife,
But to life, itself…
He wanted to taste true freedom, I cannot blame him. I remember the ways in which I hurt him - things that a woman should never ever do,
Split him through the middle right in two…
Yet, forgave me, he did,
For his love was just like a kids, so pure, so true, so innocent, I have never known a soul so magnificent,
And I will never, ever stop reminiscing..
Love, on what was….
I wonder, will it be, again, my sweet, old soul-ed friend?”