Rowaelin and Feylin; Parallels and Abuse: Why Context Matters
Right, we need to sit down and have a very serious talk about something: Feylin and Rowaelin. The ways in which they are…Not alike. Not even a little bit. This is a meta concerning the fact that Feylin is abusive, yes, absolutely, without doubt. Rowaelin is not. If you can’t possibly get your head around that I suggest you leave now, the next few paragraphs are unlikely to be ones you’ll respond well to.
For everyone else I’m going to sit here and hammer this out because I feel like it’s something that needs to be said. Perhaps understandably this fandom has started comparing various things between the ToG series and the ACOTAR series. Chief among them are some of the relationships and how the dynamics differ or feel the same. The main ones I’ve spotted have been Feylin and Rowaelin comparisons and FeyRhys and Rowaelin comparisons. I think there are issues in both of them and I will talk briefly about FeyRhys/Rowaelin to further a point or two but the more serious comparison is the one between Feylin and Rowaelin which is what this is going to focus on.
I’ve seen a couple of posts now that try and argue the fact that Rowaelin and Feylin share certain similarities and that, more specifically, Tamlin and Rowan parallel each other and the argument is that Tamlin is abusive and has been shown to be so within the narrative; Rowan is as well, the only difference is that Rowan’s abusive tendencies aren’t called out within the narrative. This is something I have a pretty serious issue with.
Tamlin and Rowan as characters I can understand being paralleled. There are certain similarities between them. Both of them are male (and love interests for our leading lady); both of them are Fae; both of them are warriors; both of them are outwardly quite stoic and reserved; both of them have been shown to have quite territorial and protective instincts. That all parallels on a very surface, very simplistic level, yes, I’ll give you that. That’s where it ends.
You cannot simply compare and contrast traits and use them to say that someone is abusive as a result. It doesn’t work that way. These characters operate within completely different worlds, completely different sets of circumstances with completely different pasts, back-stories, personalities, motivations, drives, and methods. It’s fair to say that they have similar traits; it is not fair to extrapolate from those traits and say that they are the same, that they behave the same or that their relationships with two completely different female characters are the same. There’s no basis for that whatsoever.
The name of the game here is context. Context, especially within media where it’s been very carefully built up and ties in with the character dynamics, developments as well as the plot line, is incredibly important. If I twist and manipulate context I can make anything look pretty much exactly the way I want it to suit my argument. That’s what’s being done here. And to be completely honest I’m sick, tired and fed up with it.
You want to compare and contrast Rowan and Tamlin, their narratives and their relationships with Aelin and Feyre respectively? Fine. Let’s do that. Let me compare and contrast and show exactly how and why they’re completely different, why Rowaelin is a healthy, positive relationship and why I get supremely pissed off when people plaster the word ‘abusive’ all over it to try and suit their ship war needs.
Protectiveness. That’s the main issue that people are comparing in Rowan and Tamlin’s storylines. Protectiveness and the way it can quickly become possessive and controlling. Tamlin is protective of Feyre; Rowan is protective of Aelin; those are the facts. Where the argument on abusive behaviour moves on from here is: Tamlin is protective and abusive; Rowan is protective; therefore Rowan is also abusive. Makes for a seemingly quite neat and logical argument doesn’t it? Except for the fact that it’s blatantly false. There is nothing inherently abusive in being protective; there is nothing inherently abusive in wanting to shield or defend a significant person in your life.
So with protectiveness itself the parallels between Rowan and Tamlin end and the contrasts begin. The way they respond to this protectiveness, their reasons behind it, the context of the narrative in which it’s framed are all vastly different and they’re all incredibly important. These relationships are all very complex, deeply layered, nuanced and there’s a real emphasis on subtlety. This means that making ham-fisted comments like the above argument is pretty disrespectful to the text and the issues that it’s pointing out as well as the character, relationship and world-building that have gone into making them. Simplifying them for the sake of a point is petty, childish and wrong. So let’s not. Let’s compare them properly in depth.
Firstly, the way in which Rowan and Tamlin see and treat protection is interesting and important. Tamlin, as I’ve argued before on several occasions, uses protection as a front for his control. This has been his MO since the moment Feyre walked into that manor house:
· He glamours her so she can’t see most of the faeries around her and the ones she can see look ‘normal’ and she justifies this on him trying to look out for her and stop her from trying to run away and get herself hurt in the wilder lands beyond the manor house. That was indeed his motivation but he’s controlling and manipulating her mind in order to do so.
· The dinner scene on her first night: he uses magic to bind her in place and refuses to let her up until she’s eaten. On the surface the ‘motivation’ behind this is fairly reasonable: you’re about to keel over, I want you to eat something for your own well-being. But again it strips away her agency and the choices that she has every right to make.
· The act of biting her neck on Calanmai with the order “Don’t ever disobey me again.” She disobeyed him; he used physical force to punish her after she disobeyed his orders (orders that he never explained – keeping her ignorant about her surroundings, even when they put her in very real danger, is also another form of control) He then puts the blame for this onto her; he holds her accountable for his responses to her. His assault on her is termed as the consequences of her actions; he never takes responsibility for it.
· Then in ACOMAF this issue becomes even more pronounced and unhealthy. He has guards follow her everywhere and refuses to let her leave the estate grounds despite her repeated requests to do so. In the end he uses magic to forcibly trap her in the house to prevent her from leaving and keep her safe. This triggers her PTSD and causes her to have a panic attack as a result – this is the final straw, the thing that makes her realise that he has placed her ‘protection’ and safety for his own peace of mind above all else – including her physical and mental well-being and it’s the final thing that makes us as readers realise how controlling and abusive this relationship has become.
So, in each of these instances Tamlin does something incredibly problematic in that each one of them results in him controlling some aspect of Feyre’s life. They all strip away her agency, her freedom and her choices. But they’re also all apparently for her own good. They’re also all framed in such a way that makes it very difficult for her, or anyone in her situation, to see them as abusive. He justifies them all with ideas of love and protection. These are things that generally have very positive associations with them, loving, protecting and wanting to keep those you care about safe is not an inherently bad thing what becomes bad is when you do this to the exclusion of all else; when protecting them becomes controlling them because you’re smothering them and refuse to listen when they tell you so or stop when they ask you to.
Tamlin stripping away Feyre’s agency, choices, freedom and control is what makes this dynamic abusive and unhealthy. Not Tamlin’s protectiveness in and of itself; there is nothing unhealthy in that; there is something very unhealthy in the way in which he uses it.
Rowan’s idea of protection is very, very different. He never crosses that line; he never attempts to use that protectiveness as a way to emotionally manipulate Aelin or force her into accepting his control. Several times Feyre feels obliged to go along with Tamlin’s abusive behaviours and accept them even though they’re hurting her because she thinks he has her best interests at heart. Rowan never does this; Rowan I don’t think ever actually outright forces Aelin into doing anything .
Their storyline, from the very beginning, is dictated by Aelin’s choices; not Rowan’s. Aelin chooses to allow Rowan to train her and determine if she’s worthy to join Maeve; that’s what sparks of their whole Heir of Fire plot. Aelin chooses to accompany Rowan into every single dangerous situation that he takes her in to as part of her training.
Rowan does not manipulate her in any one of them; Rowan explicitly lays out the scenario for her and she chooses to enter into it. So yes Rowan’s training sometimes puts Aelin in danger but he never manipulates her into it; never backs her into a corner or makes her feel like she has no choice. Aelin has very clear and very defined choices throughout their relationship and in fact at one point she chooses to leave and Rowan makes absolutely no move to stop her. He goes after her to stop her from getting herself killed…But then she chooses to return and train with him.
Consent and agency are important here. The fact that Aelin is running everything is important when we’re talking about this in context of a potentially abusive relationship. Unlike Feyre and Tamlin Rowan gives Aelin very clear choices. She is free to leave whenever she wishes. She is free to stop training with him whenever she chooses. She is free to remove herself from this situation the moment she’s not happy or comfortable with it. Feyre doesn’t have that freedom with Tamlin; she becomes trapped in her situation by his abuse and that is why it’s unhealthy.
Back to the issue of protectiveness which is something people seem to have a bigger issue with in QoS than HoF (HoF has a whole other host of so-called ‘issues’ that I may or may not get into more) but this scene in QoS I’ve seen referenced as evidence for Rowan’s abuse of Aelin:
“I was perfectly safe.” Lie. She hadn’t been sure whether Lorcan would even show up—or whether he would fall for her little trap. Rowan poked her cheek gently, and pain rippled. “You’re lucky scraping you is all he did. The next time you sneak out to pick a fight with Lorcan, you will tell me beforehand.” “I will do no such thing. It’s my damn business, and—” “It’s not just your business, not anymore. You will take me along with you the next time.” “The next time I sneak out,” she seethed, “if I catch you following me like some overprotective nursemaid, I will—” “You’ll what?” He stepped up close enough to share breath with her, his fangs flashing. In the light of the lantern, she could clearly see his eyes—and he could see hers as she silently said, I don’t know what I’ll do, you bastard, but I’ll make your life a living hell for it. He snarled, and the sound stroked down her skin as she read the unspoken words in his eyes. Stop being stubborn. Is this some attempt to cling to your independence? And so what if it is? she shot back. Just—let me do these things on my own. “I can’t promise that,” he said, the dim light caressing his tan skin, the elegant tattoo. She punched him in the bicep—hurting herself more than him. “Just because you’re older and stronger doesn’t mean you’re entitled to order me around.” “It’s exactly because of those things that I can do whatever I please.” - (Queen of Shadows, Chapter 36)
On a surface level I get why people call this part out and start taking issue with it. But on a purely surface level, without further consideration, Tamlin’s behaviour can be excused away. It’s why Feyre and the reader were taken in by him in ACOTAR and why she struggled to accept the situation she’d fallen in to and the realities of it. If you actually look at this scene in greater depth I think I can explain why it doesn’t imply anything unhealthy at all for Rowan and Aelin’s relationship.
First of all, on a pretty basic level, there’s a massive, massive difference between what these two male characters are having an issue with/becoming protective about in these scenes. Tamlin is saying: do not leave the house or gardens alone, I don’t think it’s safe, my own PTSD and trauma is making me obsessed with your safety and I’m perceiving threats where there are none and refusing to listen to when you try and counter that.
Rowan is saying: the next time you sneak out of the house and nearly get yourself killed by the most powerful warrior in Maeve’s cadre would you please tell me about it first. (Note that Rowan in this scene never actually says to her: never do that again; he just says, the next time you do that, don’t do it without a bit of back-up which, I don’t know, personally, sounds a hell of a lot like common sense)
There’s been a question of Rowan questioning Aelin’s independence here and tying that in with Tamlin stripping away Feyre’s agency and yes; I think Rowan is questioning Aelin’s independence (rightly so) but not in the same way that Tamlin strips away Feyre’s.
Aelin struggles a lot in QoS with her shifting roles, with completely letting go of Celaena Sardothien, the assassin who did not have to follow any rules or laws, didn’t have to worry about perception or politics, who existed and behaved exactly as she decided with very little thought of the consequences. Aelin can’t do that. Aelin can’t have the same sort of independence that Celaena had because Aelin is a queen. Aelin has the hopes and hearts of an entire nation; an entire people, in fact an entire continent balanced on her shoulders. She cannot do the things she once did. She cannot do whatever she pleases. She cannot just do everything alone with no thought to her personal safety because Rowan is right; it’s not just her damn business anymore: it’s the whole of Terassen’s.
Aelin as a character, especially in QoS, is incredibly independent and incredibly mistrustful. The girl just gets shit done and she rarely hangs around to discuss those plans with anyone else. But she can’t think or operate like that anymore. She is a queen who is gathering a court to her; she is not a reckless child. Her growth in this book is very largely centred around that fact: around her learning to really become Aelin, a mantle she rejected for so long precisely because of the responsibilities and restrictions that came with it.
Rowan isn’t looking at her and seeing someone he wants to control: he’s looking at her and seeing his queen here. And he’s seeing his duty to her. Rowan is bloodsworn to Aelin; he will give his life to protect hers, he will kill and main and fight and die for her if need be. But that’s a give and take relationship: he protects and serves her so she can protect and serve her people. There’s a reason that monarchs have protectors like Rowan: they’re important; they’re the one we need to keep alive; because they do not represent their own individual interests anymore: they represent their people’s.
This is what Rowan is referring to here when he tells her it’s not just her damn business anymore. This is what the issue is for him with her sneaking out to do things on her own. It’s not that he personally doesn’t want her doing it because it puts her in jeopardy (though I’m sure he wouldn’t be jumping up and down at the thought of it) he reacts this way because it his sworn job and duty to serve and protect her, to keep her safe and make sure she wakes up every morning. He swore a blood oath to this effect and it’s something he takes incredibly seriously.
For contrast; consider the scene in Heir of Fire where Aelin leaves Mistward. He lets her go (again; as he let her go that night with Lorcan; I’ll get to that in a minute though) He doesn’t try and stop her but he does go after her and stop her from getting herself killed because she’s bitten off more than she can chew. This is the same idea as that. In both instances he helps her and saves her from a dangerous situation (because he did save her from Lorcan here; she’d have been in deep shit if he hadn’t found her) the only difference in HoF is that now she’s not just his student or a person he wished to save from an unpleasant fate: she’s also his queen.
This is what informs on his behaviour; this is what makes her tell him the next time she does something like this to bring him with her. It’s not a desire to control it is a genuine desire to protect someone that he’s sworn to do. He’s essentially saying here, look dear, I get it, you’re an independent assassin who can take care of yourself, but you’re also making my job fucking difficult, could you not?
As a queen, baiting and trapping Lorcan the way she did has very far reaching consequences (I doubt Maeve would have been delighted if she’d killed her commander for instance) Rowan is there to protect and serve. His job, his duty, the duty that she chose for him to have is to protect her, to keep her safe and make her consider the things that she’s not considering herself.
Finally, on this point, I think there’s also a lot to be said for the difference between actions and words. Rowan here tells her that “I can’t promise that,” he can’t promise not to come and protect her if she does something daft and dangerous again. But he does not say I will stop you doing it. When he’s initially telling her off he doesn’t actually get pissed at her decision to do this; just that she keeps him out of the loop and doesn’t tell him what’s going on (which again makes his job difficult)
Rowan never actually tells her that she can’t do something. And Rowan sure as hell doesn’t actively stop her from doing anything. That’s another big difference with Tamlin. Tamlin uses magic to forcibly and physically trap Feyre inside the house. He forces her to comply with his will, he forces his choices and his authority on her and utterly strips her of her agency and control in the process. Rowan never tells Aelin what she can’t do. Rowan never forcibly stops Aelin from doing anything or forcing his will or authority onto her.
He says he can do as he pleases, he orders her to tell him the next time she does something like this. But he never follows-through on that. He never forces her to comply with his will. He expresses his unhappiness at what she’s done; he explains why; he calls her out on her reckless behaviour. But at the end of the day he never actually does anything about it. He never restrains her or locks her up or does anything at all that strips her of her agency. He lets her make her choices and lets her do what she sees fit: he just also tags along to make sure that in doing so she doesn’t get herself killed (which is his job.)
That’s another issue that I have with the Rowaelin/Feylin comparisons. Not only are their motivations completely different their relationships are completely different. And I’m not just talking about the fact that Feyre and Aelin are incredibly different characters in themselves I’m talking about the actual basic stripped back relationship dynamics. Feyre and Tamlin’s relationship is almost exclusively romantic (he deliberately shuts her out of any kind of power; she will be his wife and consort but never his High Lady or equal, she does not have power)
Meanwhile at this point Aelin holds almost all of the power in her and Rowan’s relationship (though she never twists it in the way that Tamlin does with say Lucien) but if anything Aelin is more comparable to Tamlin here status wise. She is Rowan’s queen; as Tamlin is Feyre’s High Lord. Tamlin and Feyre’s relationship is based on their romantic partnership Aelin and Rowan’s is far, far more than that. They have both taken on various different roles, mentor and student, commander and soldier, queen and protector, friends, carranam and finally lovers.
The dynamics are completely different which makes all of their interactions informed and altered by this dynamic. It’s another thing that needs to be taken into consideration because, as I think I demonstrated above, the queen and protector dynamic is the main one that’s in play here. Yes I’m sure Rowan is also looking out for Aelin as his friend but in this scene, when she’s recklessly endangering her own life she is his queen first and foremost and he is adhering to his duty to defend her which completely and utterly transforms the nature of this scene.
Once again, I’m going to reinforce the fact that context matters. You cannot strip this scene of its context or Aelin and Rowan’s relationship of that context and talk about it as starkly as has been done.
In looking at each of the above scenarios, both with Rowan and Tamlin and considering and evaluating their behaviour I considered the context very carefully. As it happens I can pretty easily twist each of the above Feylin scenarios and sell that as being a healthy relationship if I so choose:
Tamlin is trying to protect Feyre. Tamlin just wants to keep the person that he loves most in the world safe. Tamlin gives her guards to look after her and has her stay in the grounds and the manor house because that’s where she’s safest and that’s his number one priority: looking after his betrothed and keeping her from the harm he couldn’t keep her from while they were trapped Under the Mountain together.
See? If I strip that relationship of all of its context; if I remove Feyre’s past, if I don’t consider the broader circumstances surrounding this: the fact that Feyre feels suffocated by this, the fact that it triggers her PTSD and puts her physical and mental health in extreme jeopardy (a fact which Tamlin seems content to ignore), the fact that it strips her of her control and her agency, the fact that she’s specifically told Tamlin this and he only tightened his hold and made things worse than I can make Feylin sound actually pretty positive when in fact it’s horrifically abusive.
This is the same effect that takes place when people try and argue against Rowaelin. They strip away context; they strip away the relationship dynamics, they strip away the narrative arc, they strip away Rowan’s motivations, they strip away all of the character and relationship development these two went through in QoS, they strip it down until we’re left with very bare, surface actions that, when removed of everything above, have about as much to do with them as the theory that the moon is made of cheese: if all I use to go on that is the fact that “well they look really similar therefore they must be the same” I can sell that shit to anyone who’s willing to listen. But it doesn’t stop it from being what it is: a steaming pile of complete and utter bullshit. Same difference here.
Finally, just to address one last thing while we’re on the subject of ACOTAR and ToG comparisons in relation to this discussion I’ve also seen Rhys and Rowan contrasted to try and make a point. Rhys’ very strong emphasis on reinforcing Feyre’s choices and agency set against Rowan’s protectiveness and things like the scene I quoted above to try and show that Rowan is abusive and that Rowaelin is unhealthy…Because it doesn’t function in exactly the same way to FeyRhys and obviously there is only one exact template for a healthy relationship and if it doesn’t fall into that category it’s abusive. Yeah. Great logic.
Once again (at least it’s consistent) this completely and utterly ignores the context of both relationships. I mean first of all it’s really quite disrespectful of Aelin and Feyre as individual characters? Rowan and Rhys respond to them differently because they are very different people with very different backgrounds, situations, personalities and needs.
Aelin is learning to become queen, Aelin is learning to grow into her crown and Rowan is helping her do that by pointing out the fact that she no longer exists solely for herself. She has a greater purpose now and she cannot do that entirely on her own. Meanwhile Feyre has just come out of an incredibly controlling and abusive situation. Rhys reinforcing the idea that her agency is valid and completely her own, reminding her repeatedly that she has choices and freedom is what she needs because that is vital to her recovery and her learning how to be in and form healthy relationships again.
Rowan and Rhys’ responses are different because their partners, the people that they are responding to are completely different and need different things from them. What would be bad is if they were identical. Tamlin refuses to vary his treatment of anyone in ACOMAF; his own well-being, his own recovery, his own mental health reinforced by his feeling in control is prioritised not only over Feyre’s well-being but also Lucien’s and his people’s. He calls in the Tithe and reasserts his control three months after Amarantha’s downfall; exactly the same way he does with Feyre. Varying responses based on situation, personality and need is good. Of course they don’t respond the same because Feyre and Aelin aren’t the same and don’t need the same things from their partners.
This comparison is also incredibly reductive of Rowan and Rhys’ characters (and the effort and obvious time and care SJM has invested in crafting them) A character’s motivations and actions in this series never come from one place alone: they’re tied in to various different aspects of the story as whole; the narrative itself, the themes of the narrative, but also their own personality, the relationship dynamic in question but also their own pasts.
The way in which Rowan and Rhys respond to Aelin and Feyre in these instances is; as well as being the response that benefits and supports them, is also deeply tied into their own histories and traumas.
Rowan protects Aelin, Rowan emphasises keeping her safe and doing his job and his duty to her because he failed Lyria. He was bound to protect her too as his mate and the mother of his unborn child and he failed her. He left her. With that in mind these scenes where he goes after Aelin, where he makes sure that he’s there for her if she needs him is directly died into his own history with Lyria. He left her alone and completely undefended and she was brutally murdered because he wasn’t there.
He makes sure that he is there to protect Aelin; he makes sure that he will never fail her the way he failed Lyria. But he never crosses into that same extreme as Tamlin: he makes sure he’s there but he never stops herself putting herself in danger or doing what she feels like she needs to do. He just makes sure he’s not a million miles away when the danger is happening.
Meanwhile Rhys’ responses to Feyre are very keyed in to his own past, to the rape and abuse that he suffered at Amarantha’s hands for nearly fifty years .Remember that Rhys has only very recently come out of his own abusive relationship where his agency, control, choices and freedoms were denied him just as Feyre’s were. He sees her and understands her struggles on a very personal, very intimate level because he has lived through them too.
He gives Feyre what she needs in reinforcing her choices and her agency because he understands that that’s what he needed to. When he was finally freed from that relationship he needed someone to remind him that he had choices and agency and control and this is the lesson that he helps Feyre learn as well.
Trying to just flatly parallel these two characters and situations without considering any of this is, frankly, idiotic. Their responses are informed both by their partner’s needs and situations but also by their own pasts and traumas. And all of that is ignored in favour of trying to make a character look bad/abusive in order to discredit a ship.
That’s actually the thing I have the most problem with here. Tamlin and Feyre’s storyline resonates with and is incredibly helpful to the people who have survived that kind of abuse. The idea that he can love her but still hurt her is important. The idea that he can call it protection but it can actually be abuse and control is important. The idea that someone can truly wish to help us and protect us can cause us incredible amounts of pain and damage us is important.
And all of that is getting brushed over for the sake of trying to ‘call out’ abuse to discredit a ship. Frankly, if you can’t see how that might be wrong, if you can’t see that very shallowly plastering a very real, very serious issue over a fictional relationship because you don’t really like it is a fairly fucked up thing to do we need to talk.
I’m not saying that people have done this deliberately or even actively but I’m saying that ignoring canon, ignoring the context of these nuanced delicate situations can lead to drawing conclusions that can actually be very damaging to people. Abuse is not something to be thrown around lightly or used to make a point on why a character should or shouldn’t be with someone.
SJM has done an incredible job with the Tamlin/Feyre relationship and the representation that she’s very delicately and carefully handled with it. It’s very saddening to see so much of the rich complexity of this series and of these relationships glossed over at best and utterly ignored at worst for the sake of petty fandom ship wars, and in all honesty, the fact that this is being routinely done kind of disgusts me. Abuse is not something you can wave around the way you would the thought that ‘their personalities clash’ or something. It’s a very real, very serious real life issue that Maas has done an incredibly job drawing attention to and it’s not something that I want to be obscured for ship wars, that’s the bottom line here.
TL;DR: Feylin is abusive; Rowaelin is not. Tamlin and Rowan are both protective, yes, but Rowan is genuinely protective and has every right to be as Aelin’s bloodsworn shield defending his queen. Tamlin’s protection transcends it and very quickly becomes a paper thin justification for control and abuse. The context in which Rowaelin and Feylin take place need to be considered: their specific relationship dynamics, the difference between Feyre and Aelin, the power imbalance in Feylin which isn’t present in Rowaelin.
Protectiveness itself is not abusive. The way in which Tamlin manipulates it is what makes it abusive: he strips away Feyre’s agency, choices, freedom and control and justifies it with love; he prioritises making himself feel better by thinking he’s keeping her safe over her mental health and well-being and excuses it because he claims to be protecting her. This is never present in Rowaelin. Aelin drives that relationship; Aelin’s choices drive that relationship and have done from the moment she agreed to allow Rowan to train her.
The characters and the world have been built up with an extraordinary amount of care and detail. The abusive relationships that are present have been handled with an incredible amount of sensitivity and delicacy: something that the fandom is very clearly missing when they draw and draw poorly thought out parallels that are damaging to abuse survivors and show complete lack of respect for the very careful narrative which has been drawn up here.
Characters relate to one another in different ways for different reasons and their responses are often framed by their own personalities and pasts. It is impossible to strip these away when analysing the content of these novels. It’s possible to completely change the way something looks if you remove all context. It’s something we need to stop doing because it’s damaging, reductive and just flat out wrong.
Feylin is an incredibly well crafted abusive relationship which has been handled so well by SJM. Rowaelin simply is not. There is no actual evidence for Rowaelin being abusive in any way shape or form. You cannot parallel any of these characters to such an extreme extent without the conclusions being paper thin and honestly just false. Please stop doing it.
If you have the time, read this. If you don’t, it’s definitely worth a good skim. Quick shoutout to @luchs2 for sending this to me
