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Seventeen

[rsfvha94j1]

2015: the first year I actually took the initiative to give up on friendships and let go of forced ones. If you don’t hit me up, I won’t either. I’m done hitting people up first all the time. Peace out to the handful of friends who were once really good friends but obviously you don’t appreciate me or take me for granted or are too busy with your own lives to care about mine. And that’s fine I just wish u all the best y’all are really old memories now though. Quietly letting go of such friendships may come off as passive aggressive but there’s nothing angry about my decision anymore lol its senior year DEUCES

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good vibes only I’m lucky enough to have so many real friendships that if one doesn’t match up to it why keep it?

[childishnes]

[rsfvha94j1]

Something I learned from living in New York City: Look, act, and seem like you know what you’re doing, and no one will ever question you

[rsfvha94j1]

Dating tip: Run as fast as you can towards God,and if someone catches up, introduce yourself. -Matt James Fitness

[wordsnquotes]

I don’t do anything with my life except romanticize and decay with indecision.

Allen Ginsberg, The Book of Martyrdom and Artifice (via wordsnquotes)

[lovequotespost]

[rsfvha94j1]

hqlines:

[egzpl-deactivated20160802]

The realest people don’t have a lot of friends.

(via bl-ossomed)

[yeezusquote]

[lovequotespost]

[rsfvha94j1]

hqlines:

[rsfvha94j1]

I don’t know why i act naive when my friends lie to me. I think it’s because I’m always in a mix of emotions. They make excuses, because they know they’re wrong but they want to be right and justify the shit thing they did. Or they act dumb. Or they just say sorry but they totally don’t regret wtf they just did. I think the mix of emotions I feel is first shock, denial, disrespect, patience, disbelief, kindness, and then hopefulness.

Shock, because I would’ve never expected my friend to ever wrong me like that.

Denial, because I don’t want to believe that my supposed “best friend” just wronged me

Disrespect, because I feel walked over and treated with no regards at all or any thought put into or even the littlest of care

Patience, because I’m not mad. I’m disappointed, and I’m waiting for the effing day my friend will realize her wrong and I don’t explode I just stay as cool as possible

Disbelief, because after thinking it all through, yup like I wasn’t already off the bat 100% sure I just got disrespected, running through whatever just happened I was just screwed over by my friend big or small :)

Kindness, because I forgive easily and I forget easily, BUT ONLY IF YOU DON’T DO IT EVER AGAIN. “Making it up” doesn’t count. I don’t want no fucking food or extra time spent with you, foh, just don’t ever fucking do it again. Simple as that.

Hopefulness, because yet again I’m still hopeful that I didn’t actually just realize my bestfriend(s) is as amazing as I thought or care ab me the way I do ab her and that you’re actually little enough to her to wrong. lol.

[rsfvha94j1]

Honestly my friends will always subtly wrong me and I’ll never say shit I’ll speak to them less and they’ll wonder why I’m being distant lmao.

So many things on my mind right now

Like the few times I’ve been lied to by my friends, nearly stood up to hang out with other friends, and me just acting totally naive like I DON’T know she just fucking lied to me and is hanging out with other friends, and guy friends. The other day marked twice that happened to me. That’s never effing happened to me before and this school year that’s happened twice. Why the hell would you waste my time and disrespect me like that for your own selfish wants. If you made a commitment, keep it. Where the hell are your values and morale? If someone is giving you their time, you sure as shit better give them your time as well. Don’t fucking leave them early just because there’s a more exciting event to go to and lie ab it and don’t fucking act innocent and totally unaware and naive of everything you’re doing. Whatever lol. Some people were just raised pretty dumb I guess. I thought things like this was basic ass courtesy and common sense but I guess not.

[rsfvha94j1]

I really hate having friends with boyfriends. Once they’re in a relationship or if they’re in one I just lose appetite for the friendship but nonetheless still of’c love them and whatnot. It’s just that inevitably they will revolve around their boyfriend, their boyfriend will be their primary go to person to chill or talk to, their mood depends on their boyfriend, chilling with them isn’t the same bc they have their boyfriends constantly messaging them or if they’re the strict annoying as shit ones then they can’t go out and have fun with me like they used to, all their energy and money goes to their boyfriend and they never seem to realize how much of their lives are conformed by their boyfriends. I don’t know it’s just really annoying. Unless you’re the kind of friend who’s the dominant girl in the relationship and don’t get all sad when their boyfriend is mad at them or whatever and just tell them to stfu. So annoying having whiney friends who are like “________ is mad at meee :(”. It’s even more annoying when you have friends that tell you abs nothing ab their relationship and it’s like okay lol u go and have fun with him w whatever y’all are doing. If I’m not told anything or given any updates on how the relationship is or like if you don’t mention to me things here and there things that he does for you then you and your relationship will become irrelevant to me and our friendship will resume to its normal strength when y’all break up. lol. I hate having friends with boyfriends where the vibe is that I’m hanging out with a couple, not just 2  friends. I have friends who are in relationships and I can chill with their boyfriends and them no prob and its not a bother but I have other friends where even if they try to make it not a 3rd wheel things, it is. Like I don’t even get why my friends are dating right now and are getting so hung up on premature little 17 year old boys. Like god you’re a fool stop looking for love and being lonely. If you’re dating at this age how serious you take the relationship should be at a limit. I also hate that my friends don’t know the “chicks before dicks” rule. Like that shit only applies sometimes. I don’t give a fuck ab if your man is going to get mad if you’re with him and you’ve already spent some hours with him and I hyu saying ugh can we chill I’m so mad/sad then you sure as shit better effing leave him and come over to me and cheer me up or something. i think this is all just really annoying because what I would do for my friends in a heartbeat, they wouldn’t do for me. They cut corners, make it seem like me > their bf but ik what’s real and what’s not. I would leave my bf in a heartbeat if we didn’t JUST meetup and we weren’t doing anything imp to go meetup with my friend, I would never let him control my feelings or ruin my vibe so when I go chill with my girls I’m not being annoying af and a burden. I also wouldn’t let my bf set up stupidass rules like who i can chill w and what I can and can’t do and limit not just me but all the things I could be doing with my girls. Idk just rant rant rant lol. Idk what’s worse my girls that have bfs and they’re sus af don’t tell me A N Y T H I N G and make me feel indifferent ab them bc obviously I’m not important or significant enough to know or my friends that tell me ab their boyfriends and they’re so annoying ab it acting all sad and shit. Wtf like stop being a little bitch and tell your bf to sit the fuck down and correct his ass when he thinks he can raise his voice at you.

[rsfvha94j1]

I honestly wonder what happened to me. I just noticed I became so much more blunt, bitchy, totally apathetic and indifferent of how people feel about me or think about me or say about me, the complete opposite of someones who panders or are people pleasers. I’m not gentle or soft with people when I first meet them or are with them at all. Lol wtf. When did I become like this haha tbt to when I used to be known as like nice or whatever. lol. But it’s okay the people who matter are by my side nice and cozily close. 

[rsfvha94j1]

Will freak out if I don’t have a ride to Flushing this Sunday.

[wnq-music]

Who’s to say tomorrow won’t be the best day of your life?

Matty Healy  (via wordsnquotes)

[luxuryera]

[rsfvha94j1]

Miss it

[rsfvha94j1]

Apathy.