Seeking Answers || Rundon
landonākellner:
Landonās face felt hot as he allowed a few tears to slip from his bright blue eyes, blood flowing to his cheeks even while he tried to calm himself down. Mantras he had learned in his therapy sessions started to flow through his mind telling him that his mind was lying to him, that he couldnāt help this and it was nothing to be ashamed of. But it was Rubyās touch that had his breathing on the right path to regulation again, his slightly red eyes meeting hers when she started to speak. Relief took the place of panic in his chest, the feeling of something heavy weighing against him slowly fading as her words danced through his head.
It was something he hadnāt expected and a small smile pulled at his lips when his eyes fell to the floor.Ā āYouāre likeā¦the happiest person Iāve metā¦you know, like naturally happy. You may be confused a lot and you can get hurt easily but your smile is always so genuine. I think thatās what I first noticed about youā¦that youāre a little ball of sunshine in this fucked up little world.ā Running his thumbs over the tops of her hands, Landon pulled her closer to him until she was sitting in his lap, an arm snaking around Rubyās waist.Ā
āIām sorry I didnāt tell youā¦I just didnāt want you to think of me like this. This isnāt how I want to be seen.ā He was barely whispering the words as Landon didnāt know if the explanation would make sense either. He wasnāt sure of himself, he never was really, but she deserved to know why he hadnāt brought this up before.Ā āI hate these stupid episodesā¦ā
Ruby had to laugh gently. She was confused a lot, she couldnāt deny that. And she was overly precious about silly things, but somehow it coming from Landon, it didnāt feel like he was calling her stupid or immature. It felt like he saw her flaws as positives, and even with everything going through her heart and mind, she felt her heart swell at that. One more reason she was falling for him, really. It was bittersweet, really. This whole conversation. It was heartbreaking to learn these things about him, but she could almost see the bond between them strengthening with each word.Ā
āYouāre the reason for me smile these days, mostly anyway.ā She let him tug her down into his lap, stealing her chance to nuzzle into the curve of his neck briefly, stealing some comfort for herself before pulling back to be the one to comfort him. Her fingers brushing hair from his forehead, and hand rubbing soothing circles into his back.Ā āSo itās only fair Iām your little ball of happiness.ā Sighing slightly, she bit the inside of her lip. There was still things, thoughts, feelings, she didnāt know what to do with. But none of that really mattered right then. Sheād find another time to ask.. it was just..Ā
āI get why you didnāt tell me..ā She continued biting her lip, feeling selfish for even bringing this up, but she had to ask this of him. There was no way sheād be able to deal otherwise.Ā āI just.. please donāt disappear on me again.. Iāll drive myself crazy worrying if youāre okay.. Just, text me.. a code word, anything. And Iāll.. come hide from the world with you, or give you space.. whatever you need just.. donāt keep disappearing.āĀ
