Curse of the drowned sim @rusiky-blog - Tumblr Blog

maviayicik

unimpressedcats

why only 3 socks kitty??????

nerdfighterwhatevernumbers

List of things to say when someone asks why you don’t want kids

I promised my firstborn to a witch and really don’t want to make good on the deal

Well you can have them FOR me if it’s that big a deal to you

I don’t think I could get a good price for em on the black market

Fight me Helen

I can’t be a better parent than Angelina Jolie so why even bother

That’s my nindo. My ninja way.

I literally JUST sat down

Recite “The Highway Man” from Over the Garden Wall

Kids? What are those? I don’t understand. What are these youOH GRAVY WHAT IS THAT!?

Oohhh no, I’ve seen Disney movies, I know what happens to mothers

Centipedes? In my vagina?

*Angrily* YOU SEE!? This is just like that episode of Spongebob! *insert the plot of any episode of Spongebob in excruciating detail*

I heard they’re.. you know.. itchy. Like, as soon as you have a kid. Just totally itchy. Everything.

I’m an Aries

Well, we already got an even number so.. *shrug*

I must first capture the Avatar to regain my honor

I’m allergic

That’s just what the communists want!

I’ve been dead for seven years

Santa didn’t bring me one last Christmas, so I guess it’s no meant to be

I’m afraid they’ll have bad taste in memes

It would be unfair to my cat

I’m chaotic neutral

*long farting noise lasting at least 45 seconds*

“I don’t want to have children, I want to stay single, and let my hair flow in the wind as I ride through the glen firing arrows into the sunset.”

captainkirk94-deactivated201903

The News will try their HARDEST to avoid admitting acts of racism.

Closed caption:

reporter: We’ll never know why he shot those people.

Killer: fam i just wanted to kill black people

Reporter: his motives and reasoning will always be unknown.

Killer: dang maybe she can’t…. BLACK PEOPLE I WANTED TO KILL PLACK PEOPLE

REPORTER: Maybe it was an attack on christianity

Killer: My only problem with God is that He made black people.

Reporter: let’s not jump to the conclusion that this was about race.

Killer: NEGROEEES……THE NIGLETSS…….AFRICAN AMERICANNS

Reporter: We Don’t know what that means

Killer :Dark Brown individuals from the African Diaspora

Reporter: but its not just a black issue

Killer: UPPP GIMME THE MIC. I’M RACIST

thebootydiaries

i almost broke my neck

thebootydiaries

if one more soggy toilet paper roll tries to convince me im being oppressed i will personally send you a frozen turkey so that your mom can cook it and you can eat it and then you can watch it go through your entire digestive tract since your head is conveniently shoved so far up your ass that you have a great view of your colon

sheekeepsmewarm

that was PHENOMENAL WOW best comeback I’ve seen

abovethearbys-blog

‘The City Council would like to remind you about the tiered Heavens, and the hierarchy of Angels. The reminder is that you should not know anything about this.’

micdotcom

This 14-year-old Muslim American student was detained for bringing a homemade clock to school

Ahmed Mohamed, a 14-year-old Muslim student was arrested at his high school in Irving, Texas, after bringing a homemade clock to class, which school officials mistook for a bomb. Mohamed showed his engineering teacher first, but when the alarmed went off later in the day, that’s when the trouble started.

aviridios

tastefullyoffensive

Duck!

thomas-is-my-name

Guy 1: Shit, duck! Guy 2: (laughing) Ah, cos of the duck, is it? [A duck flies directly into Guy 2’s face with a loud “FLUMP” sound]

tr-apstar

So far this year I have learned that I am: 1) out of control 2) gayer than I thought I was

katstes

ohmy-morninglovely-deactivated2

don’t just reblog this.. think.. there are women in this world who have inserted coat hangers into themselves in order to force/create an abortion… because.. men in government thought more about the words in the Bible than the rights of women and their bodies.

Illegal abortions caused the death of many many women, infertility, horrendous internal damage and infection and royally fucked with the emotional well being of so many woman.

rad-feminism

THERE ARE WOMEN WHO HAVE STUCK HANGERS INSIDE OF THEM IN ORDER TO INDUCE AN ABORTION BECAUSE THE GOVT CARES MORE ABOUT WORDS IN A BOOK THAN WOMEN’S LIVES.

NEVER AGAIN.