Thinking about how the point of origin for Alan and Nadia is the bathroom. But for Alan, itās the bathroom in his apartment, and for Nadia, sheās so afraid of truly facing herself that itās the bathroom at her best friendās apartment.
She shirks away from anything remotely maternal or comforting or about brining people together. Sheās not hosting her own birthday, thatās too much responsibility to face and accept (both in the sense of believing and being willing to receive) that that many people love her, or at least would care enough about her to show up. Itās easier to pretend she has no friends and to be surprised when she shows up at the party, than having to be the one that brings everyone together.
Itās established that mirrors are a point of reflection, so it makes sense that both of our players start in the bathroomāthey arenāt reflecting or acknowledging that there is something wrong in how they are living their lives. But Alan has just finished taking a shower (heās not wearing a shirt so thatās what Iām assuming has happened) and heās brushing his teeth, symbolizing his compulsive need to be clean and over-prepared and looking like heās put together even if he isnāt, truly, on the inside.
Nadia, we donāt even know if she washed her hands, we just know the water is running. Maybe she only turned it on so people wouldnāt bug her and sheād have a minute to herself (not working out too well, by the sounds of the insistent rapping on the door).
Just thinking about how Alan keeps coming back to his homeāsomewhere familiar and safe, even if gravely cold and sterileāwhile Nadia is somewhere warm and busy and where she is the reason for the party, but itās not her home. Itās not her space, no matter how comfortable she is in Maxās apartment. But, honestly, she doesnāt seem that comfortable. At first she points out that it used to be a Yeshiva as a kind of cool fact, almost an armor to show off how much she knows and how intellectual yet unorthodox and anti-authority and devil-may-care she is, pun intended. Yet, as we continue to follow Nadia, we learn that sheās actually unsettled and uncomfortable with the fact that Max lives somewhere that used to be sacred and religious, it should be untouchable, but instead itās forgotten and renovated.
So there are those differences in the two āfirst positionsā, but also the differences in how the characters are portrayed with their hygiene. As Natasha Lyonne has said, weāve never seen Nadia take a shower (have we even seen her brush her teeth or wash her hands?). The last difference is Alan rebooting shirtless while Nadia is wearing so much black clothing. Alan doesnāt have issues with isolating himself, he actually depends on his inner circle too much, hence the willingness to be open to other that him rebooting shirtless symbolizes. His issue is not being honest with himself, thatās an internal, personal thing. Nadia, doesnāt let people in, hence the cost and shirt and the jacket. She goes through the journey of realizing itās okay to have people in your inner circle, itās okay for relationships to be permanent and healthy rather than meaningless one night stands (or sexualizing self hatred, which is such a perfect Nadia quote). Alan realizes that he has to look at himself directly instead of ignoring how he feels. Sort of like the fruit being rotten on the outside but ripe on the inside, but backwards. Things look alright from an outsiderās perspective (heās clean, heās healthy, heās taking care of himself), but itās performative and heās rotting on the inside. The same with Nadia, just different specifics. Itās easy to fool people with confidence and good looks.
Writing and thinking about all this really makes me realize how perfect the season 2 finale is, I love the final shot so much. Nadia stares back at herself, fully accepting her past and her heritage and herself, and smiling. Itās comforting and haunting and familiar yet so mature and loaded. Sheās smoking and itās a bit of a distance, a smoke screen, if you will, from the audience and possibly herself. But itās also familiar and habitual, we canāt expect to be perfect all the time or become perfect overnight. And she just went through a really wild and rough experience, I think a cigarette is warranted.