Pigg?

Me: Ryan Pigg -Writer/ @ryanpigg & @historicalroast- ryanpigg.com 

[ryanpigg]

Hitler Reaction LIVE

Watch Hitler realize he's being roasted for Historical Roast's one year anniversary moments before the show. Edited by Ryan Pigg Graphic animation by Joe White

[paulftompkins]

One of the first comedy albums I was ever given was “Reality… What A Concept.” I loved it. I loved “Mork & Mindy.” I even loved Robert Altman’s “Popeye.” Robin Williams meant a lot to me when I was a kid. I knew nothing of drug use or depression. It never occurred to me that comedians, these...

[inaromanticalway]

Chris Pratt, Parks and Rec season two behind-the-scenes, "Pratt on Parks."

Cue spooky music. 

[inaromanticalway]

[ryanpigg]

America: The Stoner

There's a lot of marijuana critics saying the country will be destroyed if weed is legalized. They think everyone will be lazy and paranoid and fat and...wait a minute. If that's the future how the hell would you describe Americans now?

Here's a short list of reasons why America is a giant stereotypical stoner. 

1) We found America even though we were looking for India.

Like when Harold and Kumar were looking for White Castle, but instead arrived at Burger Shack. Not a perfect metaphor, but it works.

2) We took America cause we were like, "Oh, cool! Free continent!"

3) We revolt against 'the man'.

Women's rights, civil rights, gay rights! We are not afraid to fight for change in our country.

And the Boston Tea Party, one of the first protests in America, was an idea only a stoner could come up with. "Hey man. What's with this corporate tax break? That's not cool. Someone should do something, like dress up as Native Americans and trash some tea!"

4) We're obsessed with aliens and conspiracy theories.

Recent studies have reported about 50% of Americans believe in aliens.

As far as conspiracy theories go, 25% of Americans believed (and some still believe) that Flight 370 was hijacked, destroyed by terrorists, went through a black hole, or was taken by aliens. Alright, dude. Turn off CNN and watch Adventure Time for a bit.

5) We're spiritual.

60% of Americans believe in God. 72% of Millennials in America describe themselves as spiritual (more spiritual than religious). That's a lot of praying and meditating.

6) We're constantly in munchie mode, people!

Fast Food's at every corner. You don't want to drive an extra few miles for McDonalds so you put one at every intersection?

7) We're paranoid.

We have a scale telling us the risk of a terrorist attack! A lot of us think there's a war on Christmas amongst other wars. We thought Sputnik was Russia's spy satellite and they'd soon nuke us. "Dude, don't go outside. They'll know where you are. Let's hide under our desks to protect us from a NUCLEAR BOMB!"

8) We owe SO MUCH MONEY!!

If America was a college student and China was a gang member our legs would be super broken. 

How much debt are we in? $17,576,842,289,814.87

That's more than 17.5 TRILLION dollars! 1.3 goes to China, 1.1 goes to Japan, we owe about 6 trillion to the federal government. 

Wow! 

That's all I can think of for now. Post your reasons below why America is a stoner.

[ryanpigg]

4 Promises To You And Myself For 2014

I have a confession to make, I wasn't the best person I could have been in 2013. 

This year I did a lot of cool things that I'm proud of, but I wasn't trying to be a better person...at all.

I also know a lot of people that had a waaaaaaaay shittier year than I've ever had in my life. Needless to say, I'm not alone as someone who is ready for the new year.

Here's a list of things that I, personally, will be changing about myself so I may become a better person.

1. I'm going to be more considerate of others

I'm currently living in LA and what I hear the most is people asking what's in it for them. I constantly have to give people reasons that will benefit them so they will do me a favor. THE HELL IS THAT?! I helped a friend move a couple months ago and they offered to pay me...AND I TOOK IT! 

That's not the person I want to be. I'm going to get back to doing favors without expecting anything in return, especially for friends and family. 

2. I'm going to become healthier.

First of all, go watch Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead now.

I know I'm not in the least bit overweight, but I have a terrible diet of soda, fast food, and sugar. I don't want to waste all my money on medical treatment from now till I'm dead just so I can save $4 on a meal.

3. No more excuses

I should get this tattooed on my arm. Too many times I didn't take an opportunity cause I thought it was too crazy or told myself to do it later. What I learned from Yes, Man is if there's no huge consequences, then why not go for it? I'm going to stop stopping myself from doing things that could potential become awesome stories.

4. I won't take what everyone says to heart and I'll encourage weirdness more.

Too many times I've stopped wearing a shirt or jacket because an asshole made fun of me for wearing it. The coolest people I know wear fanny packs and vests, so fuck you, I'll do me and you can keep being a boring nag.

And when people tell me I'm not funny or I'm an idiot, they obviously are terrible at observation.

I know about 6 people that are constantly pointing out weird things our friends do and I want to just slap them and scream "THEY'RE A HELL OF A LOT MORE INTERESTING THAN YOU!" 

People want to hang out with someone who's entertaining and goofy so life doesn't suck. No one wants to be with someone who judges people all the time. You know why no one in my group of close friends reminds you of Simon Cowell? Cause we never call those people to hang out. Sorry if I'm being really harsh about this, but so many millennials are like this, and they're bringing us down. 

My friends are all weirdos, my family is full of weirdos, my gf's a weirdo, people I enjoy watching on TV and movies are weirdos, and I'm a fuckin' weirdo. Why did I start pretending not to be a weirdo? 

---------------------------------------------------

I know shit happens, maybe this will be the shittiest year of my life, but I can't blame myself if I try my best to be better.

No excuses? Your damn right.

Happy New Year! Be safe and don't take yourself too seriously.

-Ryan Pigg

[ryanpigg]

This is weird

[communitylego]

Community in LEGO: Main Cast

[allumante-deactivated20150711]

the seniors hired a mariachi band to follow our principal around today, and he got pretty into it

[medacris]

Mariachi bands make a lot of things just that much better.

[tvopeningcredits]

[lordofthefangirls-deactivated20]

[ryanpigg]

BAT WHO

[wanderingtimetraveller-deactiva]

I love my friends. I tried my best to summarize my experiences of my third year in Chicago, but like the other two montages, this only scratches the surface of the adventures we have, and the hilarity we create. The Year of the Cat

2012 - 2013

[communitythings]

Please everyone watch Community! Its an awesome show that does not deserve to be cancelled. Like the vid says, its not that bad. 

Honestly, this show has helped me so much in the past and even now. Its taught me that everyone, despite their crazy ass flaws, can be happy. There are very few TV shows or even movies out there that do this. Its funny, but its got great lessons - how many shows can say this? 

[communitytv]

Wait…

[crackers4jenn]

[ryanpigg]

I remember when this show was about community college.

[effiestrinkets]

[caccamesee]

[ryanpigg]

I think we all need a reminder today that the human race isn’t all bad.

[ryanpigg]

(Read this in the voice of Jeff Winger)

Today is my last day of college/school ever!

After this I start my life in California and my internship at Conan.

For the first time in my life I didn't make a montage video for this moment, but I did want to take a moment to talk about the time I had while going to school at Hogwarts Columbia College Chicago.

Thanks to all the friends who let me stay at their place at one point.  Thanks for everyone who helped me out with my weird sketch videos. Thanks for those who made the birthday video for my 22nd Bday (best present ever). 

Thanks for forcing me to hop fences, swim in The Buckingham Fountain, and hit on hotties out of my league. Thanks for the road trips and the hijinks. Thanks to the friends who would go out to a party with me that they knew were too far but went anyways cause I wanted to go.  Thanks for coming to a lot of concerts with me. Thanks for making me drink more, bike more, laugh more, flirt more, nap more, watch more, skip class more, dance more, work more, sing more, stare more, and be more goofy.

I won't forget you in a year or a decade or ever. You're the friends every person deserves to know but only a few people actually get to have. I was lucky enough to be that person. Thanks for reading this sappy tumblr post. I love you guys. Come visit me in LA.

-Ryan Pigg