This is a post that I was hoping I wouldn’t have to make. Because it’s long, I’m going to hide some stuff under the read more, and I’m also going to tell you what it’s about straight away:
This is a call-out post, about a person who has been harassing members of the fandom to a frightening degree. This person abuses, gaslights (makes people feel crazy), hurts, and backstabs people on a regular basis. If that were all there was to it, I wouldn’t be making this post, (and I encourage others to reblog with their own experiences about this person so that others know they are not alone).
However, this person has taken her harassment offline again and is still illegally stalking and harassing some people from tumblr irl. This is not only unacceptable, it’s criminal. Therefore, this post needs to be written.
Some of you will know who I’m talking about just from the description, and first and foremost, I want you to know that you aren’t alone if she (carolraven/carolravenbr/furiousbeast/emiliamamamia/sharakufighter/themonsterhollywood/more probably because they spring up when you block her) is bullying you.
In the time that I spent talking to Carol (chatlogs linked at bottom of read more), she was not only rude, she was also insulting my friends, harassing others, and using Aspergers as an excuse. As someone who has Aspergers, I can tell you that her behaviour is not symptomatic of the syndrome. She is using it as an excuse to be an arsehole.
Carol is 24 (a year younger than I am) and abusing people younger than her on Tumblr to make herself feel better. Despite not being attracted to women (conversation excerpt below) she told me that it’s okay if she hurts her ex-girlfriend because she is hurting (she abused a good friend of mine who drew a roppizaya picture, saying the ship “triggers” her).
To another good friend of mine, she harassed and slandered him, stalking him for two years in order to “warn others” about him. His crime? Blocking her after she harassed him, talked about him, and stole from him. She then told me a series of lies about him, saying that she had stalked him and gathered his personal information.
She has done this about and to multiple people.
Carol uses manipulation to hurt others and make them feel as though they are worthless. She uses your insecurities against you (“If only other people got to know you…”, “I guess you’re somewhat nice”, etc) so you believe that only she understands you. She says she will hurt herself so you don’t stop talking to her. She is not going to kill herself, and is using this as emotional blackmail. She has done this for years and has not attempted to harm herself in this way.
On top of that, she has isolated people from their friends, broken friendships deliberately, attempted to ostracize people (myself included) from other groups of friends, and done everything in her power to harm even the people she likes.
I’m including the chat logs (minus information that may help people locate her, myself, or others) so that you can see for yourself. I’ll be upfront about this as well: After Carol belittled and hurt my friends, I trolled the ever loving fuck out of her. It wasn’t mature or kind, but I was pissed off and I’m not a role model.
Below the read more are links to the conversation, how to spot bullying, how to stop bullying, etc. If you need help with blocking her, or anyone, either send me an ask or add me to skype (professorbuttington).
I’ll be completely transparent and answer any questions you have on Carol for the next two days (barring things that may hurt others), and will not be RPing during this time so that this is seen by my followers.
Thank you for reading.
TL;DR: Angry woman harasses the masses, leading Tsuku-mun to drag her cape out of the closet and yell about it.
PS: IF YOU HAVE BEEN HURT OR HARASSED BY CAROLRAVEN, PLEASE REBLOG WITH YOUR EXPERIENCE. YOU ARE NOT ALONE, AND THIS IS THE ONLY WAY WE CAN GET HER TO STOP.
PSS: Carol, if you see this, we don’t hate you. We just want you to leave us alone and seek help. Stop hurting people.
EDIT: Chat links will be sent out after this in a separate post.
Psychological abuse can look like:
Humiliating or embarrassing you.
Ignoring or excluding you.
Provocative behavior with opposite sex.
Use of sarcasm and unpleasant tone of voice.
Mean jokes or constantly making fun of you.
Saying things like “If you don’t _____, I will_____.”
Making everything your fault.
Isolating you from friends and family.
Constant calling or texting when you are not with him/her.
Threatening to commit suicide if you leave.
The following is a list of behaviors that may indicate a potential batterer. It is not the purpose of the listing to imply that every person with some of these attributes is a batterer or potential batterer.
At the start of the relationship, an abuser will equate jealously with love. The abuser will question the victim about who the victim talks to, accuse the victim of flirting, or become jealous of time spent with others. The abuser may call the victim frequently during the day, drop by unexpectedly, refuse to let the victim work, check the car mileage, or ask friends to watch the victim.
In the beginning an abuser will attribute controlling behavior to concern for the victim (for example, the victim’s safety or decision-making skills). As this behavior progresses the situation will worsen, and the abuser may assume all control of finances or prevent the victim from coming and going freely.
A victim often has known or dated the abuser for a brief period of time before getting engaged or living together. The abuser will pressure the victim to commit to the relationship. A victim may be made to feel guilty for wanting to slow the pace or end the relationship.
An abuser expects the victim to meet all of the abuser’s needs, to take care of everything emotionally and domestically.
An abuser will attempt to isolate the victim by severing the victim’s ties to outside support and resources. The batterer will accuse the victim’s friends and family of being “trouble makers.” The abuser may block the victim’s access to use of a vehicle, work, or telephone service in the home.Blames others for problems.
An abuser will blame others for all problems or for the abuser’s own shortcomings. Someone is always out to get the abuser or is an obstacle to the abuser’s achievements. The victim or potential victim will be blamed for almost anything.
Blames others for feelings
An abuser will use feelings to manipulate the victim. Common phrases to look for: “You’re hurting me by not doing what I want.” “You control how I feel.”
An abusive person is easily insulted, perceiving the slightest setbacks as personal attacks.
Cruelty to animals or children
This is a person who punishes animals brutally or is insensitive to their pain. The abuser may expect children to perform beyond their capability (for example whipping a two-year-old for wetting a diaper or teasing children or siblings until they cry).
“Playful” use of force in sex
This behavior includes restraining partners against their will during sex, acting out fantasies in which the partner is helpless, initiating sex when the partner is asleep, or demanding sex when the partner is ill or tired. The abuser may show little concern for his partner’s wishes and will use sulking and anger to manipulate compliance.
This behavior involves saying things that are intended to be cruel and hurtful, cursing or degrading the victim, or putting down the victim’s accomplishments.
The victim, almost always a woman, will be expected to serve. For instance, a male abuser will see women as inferior to men, responsible for menial tasks, stupid, and unable to be a whole person without a relationship.
Dual personality “Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde”
Explosive behavior and moodiness, which can shift quickly to congeniality, are typical of people who beat their partners.
An abuser will beat any partner if the individual is involved with the abuser long enough for the cycle of abuse to begin. Circumstances do not make a person an abusive personality.
This consists of any threat of physical force meant to control the partner. Most people do not threaten their mates but an abuser will excuse this behavior by claiming “everyone talks like that.”
Breaking or striking objects
This behavior is used as punishment (breaking sentimental possessions) or to terrorize the victim into submission.
Any force during an argument
This may involve an abuser holding down his the victim, physically restraining the victim from leaving, or pushing or shoving. Holding someone back in order to make demands, such as “You will listen to me!” is also a show of force.
What to do if someone threatens suicide/self harm
Emotional Blackmail: Suicide threats in abusive relationships
13 signs of emotional abuse within a relationship
Suicide threats and the Narcissist
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