people have probably already seen this, but...weevils are pretty cool.
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people have probably already seen this, but...weevils are pretty cool.
new chess piece called the jester which can move anywhere on the board but can't capture anything. it just gets in the way to annoy your opponent
hold on let me look something up
what yhe hell
reptiles I can't look at while stoned or I'll cry
welcome to my self-indulgent post where I will blab about The Creatures
You know who I am by now. I cannot resist the hoggie, those sweet little eyes, the upturned nose, the inquisitive nature. This is a plains hognose but every hognose out there is an A+ animal. And honestly don't get me started on colubrids, they are all so fuckin cute I want to kiss every one ;~;
Listen to me. You can't sleep on skinks. They're all so cute and varied, and have fun personalities. I can't possibly cover them all in one post but just. Look at them. Little dragon creatures!! Tell me what's not to adore. I dare you.
Sand boas are sweet little noodles and just adorable. This one's a rough-scaled sand boa, my personal fave. But you gotta look up the other species, they have the funniest little faces!! These creatures are just innocent sand dwellers and so deserve more love than they get!
Idc what the haters say, I love the boa faces even more than I love python faces. They look so cute, everything about them is just delightful. Did you know they have pelvic spurs that are essentially vestigial leggies? Adorable.
SPEAKING OF PYTHONS. Here are some babies! A ball and a berm! I mean, look into those eyes. Just innocence in there. Too precious for this world. I need to cuddle one on the couch with a blanket and watch a movie with them. Self-care done proper.
Do NOT get me going on geckos. ALL of them are precious beans and I wouldn't know where to start describing them all, but here is a leachie. I love all of the New Caledonian geckos to a heart-wrenching degree, but shoutout to the leachie for those giant peets and wrinkles. I have yet to hold one and I will stalk the next gecko vendor I see until I can touch one of these babes. Too fuckin cute, like a chilly, wrinkly, furless teddy bear.
( s o u r c e s ! )
yiké
just don’t do that
i just spent entirely too long on this
hunting down tumblr posts i see on pinterest part 1193
Erotic smoke detector roleplay
Waking up ur bbgirl at four in the morning to a deafening screech cause ur batteries died but yall don't have any 12-volts so she's gotta jam a pillow over your face until the noise stops n she can go back to sleep
KILLING STANCE: TEN SOUL RENDING CLAWS
Random storytime:
Back when I was studying interior glass design (like how you make those church windows and stuff), most of my schoolmates were a collection of the gayest looking alt girls considerably possible. Like my class year was about 8-12 people (depending on how you count) and in that section there were two that had a mohawk, two that had dreadlocks, and two that had blue hair. Notable mention to the one who was standing firmly in all three categories, having a blue dreadlock mohawk. But anyway I digress.
On my third year there, the new class of students had a girl who looked so wildly out of place there. Dressed all in soft vintage-y pastels with never-been-dyed sandy blonde hair, no piercings save for pearl earrings, no tattoos. Sweet, quiet, so soft-spoken that she was almost inaudible - to the point that we made jokes that we all have to learn sign language because it's the only way she could make herself heard in a rowdy art school classroom. If you've ever been in a zoo that had one of those tropical enclosures with parrots and monkeys all screaming at ear-shattering volumes and tackling each other for shits and giggles, imagine one of those rooms but there's a tiny little big-eyed white-dotted baby fawn sitting shyly in one corner.
Anyway this one time I was out with schoolmates, and she had come along. Having been at the bar for a few drinks, we retired to another classmate's place - she didn't live in the same student housing as I and most of the rest, she had her own apartment and an adorable pink hairless cat who was oddly extroverted and wanted to personally greet and inspect all guests. Didn't like me very much, on account of my hands being cold.
Anyway we sat in the living room - some on the sofa, some on the floor, drinking beers and other such beverages, talking random shit - when I noticed that Little Fawn Girl wasn't there. I knew she didn't smoke so she had definitely not snuck out for a quick one, so I had to go find her. That didn't take long, she was sitting at the hallway by the door, in the dark, with her shoulders hunched up and the hairless cat loudly purring on her lap. She was softly, very softly, petting the cat's smooth leathery skin.
Figuring she wouldn't be here if she'd want to make a scene of all this, I quietly got to her and asked if she's okay. She had tears running down her face and she was shaking, trying to draw a shivery breath to talk, clearly having difficulties to just form a sentence, not to mention also being audible over the loud rumbling engine of Pink Leather Therapy Goblin 3000 on her lap. Eventually, not being able to speak up any better, she leaned in to whisper into my ear.
"It feels just like foreskin", she said, pointedly stroking at the cat. She was drunk and was silently laughing so hard that she was crying, because the cat on her lap had the skin texture identical to that of a cock.
Hey so will my chemical dumping in the frog pond impact the trout population. I've tried my best to seal it off from the lake but I can't perfectly seal it
i don't... know what chemicals you mean?
All of them
all of them?
All of them
did you think twice before doing this?
Well I did my best to leak proof the pond
i'm concerned that i have to be the one to tell you this, but that was a bad idea, sir. the trout population will be negatively affected.
if you were trying to turn the frogs gay, i believe you've only turned them dead.
Actually they have a 97% survival rate
well, sir, not to be rude, but i find that unbelievable.
Wild caught clownfish will be like ‘hm you see, the anemone you got me is a slightly different color and tentacle width than the one I had back home, so I will not begin hosting it. I’ll be a sort of wandering ronin for the rest of my days.’ And then a captive bred clownfish will be like ‘ok so I have this curved rock I found and I just sit above it and it take care of me 👍’
Some of my favorite clownfish hosts
#mybrick
never forget the universal rule of the order of things: People Will Not Read It
signs at stores? émail? menu ?? instruction ? post online ? caption with andswer to question ? group hand outs ??? street sign ??? no. The Written Word Is The Enemy
#The number of compliments i have gotten for reading a thing
The ability to occasionally Read A Thing will make you a hero in your workplace, especially if it is for example an error message that tells you what you need to do differently, or instructions on unjamming a printer.
how dare you say we put jam in the printer
Ok reblogging this again because story time.
I work in tech, and much of what I do is support sales reps within the company by resolving errors with the software they use.
There is one sales rep who, every single time I send her a message or email with extremely specific instructions that will resolve her issue, does something completely different from what I tell her. Every time. Without fail. It is so glaringly obvious that she has never read even a single word that I have written to her.
So one day, she sends me a message that says little more than "(software) is broken, help"
So I do my standard song and dance of asking her what she's trying to accomplish, and what specifically is stopping her from doing that. And eventually, after much unnecessary back and forth, she tells me there's an error message. I ask her to send me a screenshot of the error message. She does.
The error message basically says, "these two required fields are blank. To resolve this, please fill in these two specific fields, and then click save."
So I take a few deep breaths.
Then I lie to her.
I message her back, saying "hey yeah, for some reason it's not loading that screenshot on my end. Could you type out the full text of the error message for me?"
She does.
I ask her if she still needs help.
She does not respond.
I have similar story from tech support.
Client is reporting that Some Thing Program doesn't work. I ask if there's an error message with further information about what's not working. Client says "no". I go over and ask Client to open Some Thing. Client double-clicks on the icon for Some Thing, it starts to boot, an error message dialog flashes up on screen, Client closes error message before I can read it, Thing closes after the error.
"What did that error message say?" I ask.
"What error message?" asks Client.
I tell Client to open the Some Thing again and then not click anything else. Client opens Some Thing, error message appears, Client clicks it away again.
I tell Client to stand up, step away, and give me physical control of the computer. I open Some Thing, start looking at the error message without closing it, and Client says "You should close that." I tell Client that I am reading the error message. Client is apparently accustomed to treating error messages as a kind of spam email that should be deleted as fast as possible, and gets agitated that I'm reading it.
I read the error message. It tells me what the problem is. I fix the problem. Some Thing works now.
---
Later, I start thinking about how such an error message might perhaps be engineered to be more attention-grabbing and close-resistant as a way of making people read it. It's not important for some random program here, but there are more important systems (medical, etc) where it would be reasonable to demand the user's attention because people's lives depend on paying attention to the error message.
But then people with a perverted intellect would still be thinking about ways to avoid reading the message, like dragging it off edge of screen or hiding it behind another window. So maybe the dialog box could have an always-in-front feature to override other windows, and the alert could use the computer's hardware "beep" functionality that can't be switched off by muting the regular sound system, and keep beeping... shit, I realize I'm reinventing pain, and get philosophical about it.
Story from The Past about My Mum:
She was a computer programmer / analyst, a... Long Time Ago. Called in for a system she'd installed before, the office folk said they kept having problems where it Didn't Work Right (no error, a malfunction)
She investigated, and told them that could only happen if they did 3 specific things in a specific order, which they should not ever do.
So, she asked, did they ever do that?
No! Of course not, was the answer.
So she made a couple of small changes, packed up and said that should be fine, but they should call her if there were problems.
The next week
She had a call saying "We're getting a strange error message on the system, can you help?"
She said, of course, can they tell her the error?
And the message was:
"You Said You Didn't Do This"
Let's swarm mama!
never forgetting that girl in my high school who said sandwiches are gross because, "they have different ingredients together"
People who work within a system: okay so studies show that the normal system works 90% of the time, but because it’s very bad when it doesn’t work, we’ve set up a process to manage those outliers. We need six well-trained workers to run the system 100% of the time without any serious incidents.
CEOs and politicians, every time: Well i just saw it go right twice in a row which means the normal system which you say works 90% of the time actually works 100% of the time. We’re cutting the team down to one person pulling 18 hour shifts without breaks
wikipedia is good
there's this one gay porn studio i'm subscribed to email updates for just because i am never prepared for what each email contains
pretentious gay sluts i am very fond of you
FUCK AMERICA HAPPY 100TH BIRTHDAY CEASAR SALAD 🇲🇽🇲🇽🇲🇽❗❗❗