Birdman

I only got a Tumblr cuz everyone else had one. Sam Wilson, aka Falcon, aka Uncle Sam. Nice to meet you. Be safe kids, and remember; family comes first. Father to one lucky kid

[penbwl]

What he said

[bunjywunjy]

got any cursed facts about falcons?? 🥺👉👈

compared to hawks, falcons have shorter and weaker talons and shorter beaks! this, combined with a lighter overall build, means that falconkind is really badly unsuited to do the hawk/eagle/owl thing where they just plunge out of the sky and stab a rabbit to death with their feet.

so what they do instead is fly really high in the air, keeping an eye out for unwary birds they could get the drop on, and then they DROP. and as they drop, they curl their talon into a fist, which they use to strike their unwary prey at speeds well in excess of a hundred miles per hour. (this either stuns or outright kills the unlucky target) 

and this method works so well that they can even take down birds much larger than themselves, like ducks!

so basically,

FALCON

PUNCH

[bunjywunjy]

now why don’t we give that a slo-mo action replay?

GET WRECKED.

[tipsfromabird]

Let’s just clarify that ‘compared to hawks’ thing up there.

Hawks, like eagles and buzzards and vultures, are all accipiters (order: accipitriformes). Basically this includes MOST of the non-nocturnal birds of prey.

It does not include falcons and kestrels (order: falconiformes).

However, thanks to the whole convergent evolution thing (= if you want to do the same job you end up evolving similar strategies) a lot of hawks look very like falcons. Similarly, thylacines look(ed) like dogs - even though thylacines are marsupials, and so they’re more closely related to the bilby than to dogs, and dogs are more closely related to whales than to thylacines!

So you end up with a hawk…

… looking very like a falcon….

… even though literally the only thing they have in common, in terms of ancestry, is that they are both birds.

Falcons are actually far more closely related to passerine birds (perching birds like sparrows and corvids) than they are to hawks and owls.

But you know who they’re just as closely related to (and, let’s face it, who they most closely resemble)?

These bastards.

[todaysbird]

birds are gay button

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“You’re a fighter. Look at everything you’ve overcome. Don’t give up now.”

— Olivia Benson

[sam-therealfalcon]

Guess who got a good grade 😁

The suspense is killing me

[sam-therealfalcon]

Sam I am so happy you are back! I look up to you and I hope your day is well. May I have a hug?

Aw, thanks kid, I appreciate it. I'm glad to be back too, and you may have two hugs. But that's it.

[sam-therealfalcon]

Sam have you seen a hamster around here?

Uh...no? But I'll keep an eye out for it. Hope ya find 'em!

[sam-therealfalcon]

hello!-👁👄👁

Parker, is that you? Get tha creepy face outta my inbox kid

[sam-therealfalcon]

Hey Sam*smiles*

Sup Seli

[sam-therealfalcon]

Fucking love you Sam, I wish I could meet you

Thanks kid, the love is returned. And just saying hey to literally any bird is the equivalent of meeting me, so there

[in-omnia-paratusss]

IM GONNA GO GET A BIRD BE RIGHT BACK

[sam-therealfalcon]

my bird is best bird tho don't tell the others...or Red

[bubbabarnes-deactivated20210124]

Now that I told bird brain (Sam Wilson) to kiss my ass, I’m low key expecting him to show up in my inbox with a retaliation message, BECAUSE AYO BIG BIRD.... LEAVE BUCK ALONE! Didn’t your mother tell you to always respect the elderly?!

[sam-therealfalcon]

I don't know what I did to deserve this, but it's kinda valid

[bubbabarnes-deactivated20210124]

Apparently, you were teasing him and told him that he was “getting too soft” when it comes to me and..... I’m simply just defending him 😂

[sam-therealfalcon]

@ask-j-b-barnes SNITCH

[sam-therealfalcon]

Fucking love you Sam, I wish I could meet you

Thanks kid, the love is returned. And just saying hey to literally any bird is the equivalent of meeting me, so there

[sam-therealfalcon]

Congrats on the bird! I'm glad you got medicine, and I'm so sorry to hear about the assault. If you ever need to talk, I'll listen.

((Thank you so much love, I love and appreciate you!))

[bubbabarnes-deactivated20210124]

Now that I told bird brain (Sam Wilson) to kiss my ass, I’m low key expecting him to show up in my inbox with a retaliation message, BECAUSE AYO BIG BIRD.... LEAVE BUCK ALONE! Didn’t your mother tell you to always respect the elderly?!

[sam-therealfalcon]

I don't know what I did to deserve this, but it's kinda valid

[sam-therealfalcon]

Hey Sam, do your birds work for the bourgeoisie

I can't confirm nor deny that

[sam-therealfalcon]

So just to clarify things.......you really are the falcon.

The one and only

[sam-therealfalcon]

Birb?

[kestrelsparverius]

Your conure is literally the most precious thing ever. Amazing sidekick. 14/10

[sam-therealfalcon]

///unfortunately, I wasn't able to get this one :c here's my little brat