Death of a Parent/Sibling/Relative @sammybakken-blog - Tumblr Blog

Children often need extra support and attention for a period of time

Children may worry that both parents will die and leave them alone. At these times, children may find comfort in knowing that, even if this highly unlikely event occurred, the family has a plan about who would take care of them. Consider sharing this plan with your children if they express such concerns. Children often need extra support and attention for a period of time. They might want help with homework because they are having trouble concentrating and learning. You may want to help set up some social time with friends, such as an outing to the park or a trip to the movies. Getting back to school and a regular routine is important for your children’s health and enables them to move along in their grieving process. In general, if children are having trouble getting back to usual routines after several weeks, it’s a good idea to seek outside advice. Check with your children’s health care provider or school counselor.

http://www.ct.gov/dcf/lib/dcf/prevention/pdf/after_a_loved_one_dies_-_how_children_grieve_.pdf

#death #stages of grief #grieving #effects of loss on children #children dealing with death #children and loss

Learn why it's important to have a will, how to leave property to children, what happens if you don't have a will, whether you need a lawyer, and more.

This is just one page of the article, it gives you strategic ways to create a will always keeping your children’s best interest in mind.

#death #death of a parent #how to deal with grief

If something happens to you while your children are young, who will care for them?It takes time and energy to get your important records in order. Some of the…

“If something happens to you while your children are young, who will care for them?” This article gives advice and tips about what parents should put in their wills about the well being of their child after their passing. It really just explains in simple terms the process and some ideas to specify in the will.

#Death #death of a loved one #mourning #coping with grief

Multiple Meanings of Loss

Loss and change of self: Individuals are defined in many different ways. One’s identity, self-confidence, sense and understanding of physical health, personality and role in the family can be changed by a death. Loss and change of security: One’s sense of emotional and physical safety is often shaken.A change in financial security and lifestyle may accompany the loss. Loss and change of meaning: A restructuring and re-evaluation of goals and dreams are not uncommon. In addition, children and teens may re-examine and question their faith and eve the desire to live Adults need to adjust to the environment in which the person is no longer there. Children are faced with the task of investing in new relationships and developing a new identity based on the loss: Realization and understanding occur over time as a death shapes life in new ways. Children face everyday concrete changes in routine as well as changes in responsibilities and role. Coming to terms with the differences encourages active control rather than passive avoidance. Whereas a wife may need to take over the family finances, a teenage boy may need a part time job and may develop a strong bond with a coach as a male role model and guide.

http://www.nctsn.org/nctsn_assets/pdfs/Crisis%20Guide%20-%20NYU.pdf

#death #death of a parent #words for grief #grief #mourning #mourning loss #death of a loved one

Anxiety, Insecurity and Fear

After the loss of a loved one, a child's world may feel unfamiliar and unsafe. The question, “Who is going to take care of me?” is important to answer. Family circumstances may have changed dramatically. The remaining parent is required to take on the responsibilities left by the other parent. This leaves less time for nurture and care of the children in the family. This further destabilizes grieving children. In these cases, we see either an overly parentified child, one who takes on adult mannerisms and responsibilities, or attention-seeking, often disruptive behavior. Even negative attention is better than no attention at all.

http://childgrief.org/howtohelp.htm

#death #death of a loved one #greiving #mourning

Who is going to take care of me?

Since children depend on parents and other adults to take care of them, a grieving child may wonder who will care for him or her after the death of an important person.

#death #death of a loved one #death of a parent #death of a sibling

Who Will Tuck Me In? A New Zealand picture book for younger children (4-8 years) who have a family member with a serious illness. Author Sue Garden-Bachop, a mother of three, wrote this colourful and engaging book after she was diagnosed with leuka...

Although the topic matter is heavy, this is a perfect book to buy to help explain to younger children about death. Mainly it focuses on what will happen and who will take care of them after the death of a loved one.

http://skylight.org.nz/Who+Will+Tuck+Me+In%3F

#death #children #death in the family #death of a parent #death of a loved one

Young children need help and support to understand death and other losses. Helping a young child deal with loss and grief is one of the...

This article is really good for helping explain to care givers what to keep in mind when dealing with a child of all ages that has lost a loved one.

#loss #death #life goes on

This video helps not only children, but people at all stages of life to cope with grief. It explains that there is no right or wrong way to cope, and that it is a process not a task. It encourages people to not feel alone, and to feel comforted while they grieve.

#coping with grief #never alone #techniques for dealing with loss #loss of a loved one #losing someone #death of a loved one #how to deal with grief

Siblings provide each other with friendship and opportunities to learn how to interact with others. They may also be a source of frustration. Though sibling relationships are complicated, losing a ...

This website details how a child is impacted upon the loss of a sibling, specifically psychologically. It explains how these children typically feel about their situation, and how others should react to it.

#loss of a sibling #psychological effects of loss #effects of loss on children #losing a sibling #hard times #support for children

This website explains what a child goes through after the loss of a loved one. It goes into detail about troubles they experience later on in life both in school and in general.

#loss of a loved one #coping for children #effects of death #suffering #symptoms

When a child experiences the death of a parent, the emotional trauma can be devastating. But until recently, few studies have examined the impact of this type

This website provides information from a study conducted that shows the effects of losing a parent on a child. It also provides information on therapy, as well as methods for coping with the loss.

#loss of a parent #loss of a loved one #coping strategies #coping for children #death in the family #death of a parent #finding peace

Death can leave children scared and scarred. But with support of family, friends and community, they can survive and thrive, learning a resiliency they never knew they had.

Jacquie Goetz Bluethmann

keepthepositivityflowing-blog

Parents

Going through life with both of your parents is like climbing a mountain with all four limbs; your mom being one arm and one leg, your dad being the other arm and leg. Losing a parent leaves you with only an arm and a leg for the rest of your climb. Life is just that much harder; you only have so much support to finish climbing the mountain.

As life goes on, you meet new people who then act as your prosthetic limbs, but you’re never really the same. You’ll always be weaker than you used to be and you’ll move more slowly, and with less enthusiasm.

But life goes on, and you move on. You adjust and learn how to live without your support.

sammybakken-blog

It is difficult to express our feelings sometimes, but this analogy seems to sum up exactly what it feels like to continue on living after the loss of a parent.

#loss of a parent #life goes on #support #moving on #adjusting after a loss #strength

hole-milks-blog

The Best Things to Say to Someone in Grief

1. I am so sorry for your loss. 2. I wish I had the right words, just know I care. 3. I don’t know how you feel, but I am here to help in anyway I can. 4. You and your loved one will be in my thoughts and prayers. 5. My favorite memory of your loved one is… 6. I am always just a phone call away 7. Give a hug instead of saying something 8. We all need help at times like this, I am here for you 9. I am usually up early or late, if you need anything 10. Saying nothing, just be with the person

The Worst Things to Say to Someone in Grief

1. At least she lived a long life, many people die young 2. He is in a better place 3. She brought this on herself 4. There is a reason for everything 5. Aren’t you over him yet, he has been dead for awhile now 6. You can have another child still 7. She was such a good person God wanted her to be with him 8. I know how you feel 9. She did what she came here to do and it was her time to go 10. Be strong

sammybakken-blog

Talking to someone about the death of a loved one can be a touchy subject, especially if you cannot find the right words to say. No one wants to have this conversation with another person, especially a child, but when the time comes that you must, remember these tips.

#word for loss #what to say #what not to say #words for grief #think before you speak

parentingtoolbox

Children and Grief

Grieving the loss of a loved one is difficult, especially for a child. When a child loses a loved one to death or incarceration, the loss can have a profound effect on the rest of his or her life.

Emotional, psychological and physical trauma that often come with loss challenge children’s well-being and school performance. Grieving children are likely to feel different, and very alone.

While concealing deep emotional pain, fear and loss of concentration, children are in the pressure cooker of expectations to grow emotionally and academically. They say that seeing friends with parents and parent/child school activities are daily reminders of their own loss.

Children express grief in a different way than adults. They tend to move in and out of intense feelings, rather than sustaining high levels of one emotion for long periods of time. When adults see a grieving child playing or laughing, they may mistakenly believe that the child is “over it”. This perception may influence how much grief support a child receives.

In the United States, approximately 4.8 million children under 18 are grieving the death loss of a parent.

1.5 million children in the US are grieving the loss of a parent to incarceration, sometimes for the duration of their childhood.

Community awareness and support help children heal from loss and excel in life.

Start a Support Group

The loss of a loved one is a universal human experience. How thoughts and feelings about the loss are expressed vary by culture. We encourage you to adapt information in this site to what fits for your beliefs and customs.

via childgrief.org

Ron Huxley Resources: I am preparing for some presentations to professionals who work with adoptive families and reminded about one of the most basic of all clinical tools: grief work. One of the most common assumptions is that children grieve in the same was as adults and therefore, the same tools work for them that work for big people. Each intervention should have individualized criteria built into them. Do you know of a child that has suffered a loss? What worked for them to help them cope and heal? Share with us on our Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/parentingtoolbox or leave a comment below.

survivingsiblingsuicide

#stages of grief #reality of a loss #everyone is different

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