I Love Humans

Rp blog for Orihara Izaya from Durarara. Smell that? This is what shit smells like. You ought to stop eating shit, then.

[sapiosexualinformant]

Are you OK with non-mutuals replying to your starters?

Always! If you’re ever unsure of how, feel free to reach out to me and we will figure something out.

[churroful]

SHIZAYA HELLHOLE IM BACK

Doing what I couldn't do 10 yrs ago, since my art is actually good now compared to before 🤠👍

[shiza6mo9ya]

Little joys

[coolest-boooom]

They each others sleep paralysis demons

[bookished]

“This is all your fault.” “I hope so.”

“Is that blood?” “No?” “That’s not a question you’re supposed to answer with another question.”

“You have no power over me.” “You sure about that?”

“Are you clinically insane or incredibly annoying?” “I don’t know, probably both.”

“Right now, I don’t know if I want to kiss you or shove you off a bridge.” “Can I pick?”

“Don’t you have a country to run?” “My favorite person is in the hospital, the country can wait.” “I don’t think it works like that.” “I run the country, so it does.”

“I was going to ask if you wanted to do me on your desk, but I thought I should say hi first.”

“It’s been so long. I’m probably not interested in him anymore.” “I’ve seen his Instagram, you’re definitely still interested.”

“If you’re going to die on me, the least you can do is look good while doing it.”

“I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.”

“Why are you covered in neon body paint?” “Best not to ask.”

“No, it’s really not that complicated. He’s a bad person.”

“The king is missing.”

“How could you do this to me?”

“You’ve got thirty seconds to explain to me what you’re doing here.”

“I know this may be hard to believe, but I’m on your side.”

“Never heard of that being used as a murder weapon before.”

[sapiosexualinformant]

Running down the list of my blogs that I want to try writing in again. Please like for a starter!

[sapiosexualinformant]

nyanzaya​

(🐈) Iza didn’t mind how Izaya mimicked his tone, but when he asked his questions Iza only gave a laugh. “What makes you think I haven’t already been mistaken for you? Of course… I would love for that to stop happening. What did you have in mind then? Surely,  you have a solution to such a predicament.” The feline asked, somewhat pulling away from their touch with a flick of his ear.

It was true that he did get mistaken for the Shinjuku informant at times with how similar they appeared but their difference threw a few of Izaya’s potential clients off. Though, it wasn’t like Iza would accept their clients. He had his own he had to appease after all and taking ones that were his simply wasn’t his style. Making it stop did sound appealing.

Izaya gave that twitching ear a last little pinch before allowing the petting session to end. Just for good measure. “It’s quite simple, actually: I want us to remain in contact. We can only be in one-- or two-- places at once, but, with a little cooperation, we could scratch each other’s backs without losing anything at all...” He trailed off with a smirk. “You tell me if you accidentally meet one of my people and I send you yours that I run into.” 

[sapiosexualinformant]

xfalsehcpe​:

She probably shouldn’t be walking around the city by herself so late at night. But here she is, doing it anyway. “There’s so many people still out and about this late at night… Though, I really shouldn’t be surprised.”

They didn’t call this the city that never sleeps for nothing.

“Only the best things happen late at night, didn’t you know?”

[sapiosexualinformant]

nyanzaya​

(🐈) Iza simply hummed, “What can I say? It’s in my nature to purr happily when something goes my way.” As much as he disliked being called monstrous, Iza chose to ignore it. No…the true monster was right in front of him, but he figured he would keep that to himself for the moment.

As Izaya kept petting him, Iza kept purring, trilling when he would go over a spot that he particularly enjoyed. With a small laugh, Iza simply agreed, “Alright, Orihara Iza, no relation to Orihara Izaya, lover of all fresh fish and one of the only cat hybrids to be an informant.” With that Iza pulled back slightly, “What else can I answer for you, Izaya-san?”

That was, to say the least, a very difficult concept to just accept. It was really far-fetched that this creature had absolutely nothing to do with him. With a name had face that were both so eerily close to his own. Well... It wasn’t as if he hadn’t seen stranger. This world was a mysterious one indeed.

“It is very nice when everything goes your way, Iza-kun.” He responded, mimicking the tone pressed to his own name from the other’s mouth. “Would you like to come to a mutual understanding? I think it’s only natural that we have an agreement, since it’s inevitable you and I get mixed up, don’t you think?”

[noisylovepatrol]

Shizuo & Izaya

[sapiosexualinformant]

“What a surprise visit...”

[sapiosexualinformant]

nyanzaya​

(🐈) Iza didn’t think getting head pats would be something he would almost regret. Almost. At least he was getting petted even if their previous actions were a bit annoying. Iza took his hand back when Izaya gently shook his hand away.

He still wanted more information? Then agian, Iza supposed Izaya didn’t exactly ask much yet. A part of him did figure he would toy with the idea of being the one to give Izaya the information he wanted. Something about it made him feel important.

“Nya…I don’t have to act cute for you, you know. What would acting cute get me?” He gave a soft laugh laced with purrs. One ear flicked, before he gave a small trill. “You still have more questions then?” 

“Listen to yourself while you say that. You’re a contented, monstrous kitten... Purring all over.”

Izaya true to their agreement, continued to pet the creature while he spoke, making sure to pay special attention to all the places he supposed a cat person would appreciate. “Let’s introduce ourselves properly first. You seem to know me but-- Orihara Izaya, lover of all, informant to enough.”

[sapiosexualinformant]

nyanzaya​

(🐈) Iza couldn’t help but give a laugh. “Well, it is easier to read your body language than anything else.” It was the truth. Reading facial expressions was always difficult for the feline. As long as he could read someone’s body, he felt there was no need to focus on someone’s face. “Depends on how long you pet me but, it can get you a fair bit but since it’s a discount how about I answer whatever you ask for a few hours?” Seemed fair to Iza, and frankly Izaya was getting a fairly good deal. 

Seeing their hand extended, at eye level Iza’s eyes seemed to shimmer in small excitement as his ears quivered in heightened emotion. As if expectantly, Iza leaned forward, bunting his head on Izaya’s hand. His purrs were apparent, almost content in the fact that he was getting exactly what he wanted.

“There isn’t anything funny about this actually. Though, I guess I can see why you would think it’s a joke.” Iza took in Izaya’s scent, finding a small murderous desire begin to surface. He had Izaya right in front of him, a person he wouldn’t hesitate on getting rid of– No, Iza knew he would find things more fun if someone like Izaya stuck around even if at points he himself was mistaken for the informant in front of him. Being mistaken for Izaya was the one thing Iza hated the most.

Just like a cat. He even had a convincing purr, didn’t he? Not to mention, he couldn’t feel a headband or any sort of rigging on the head to explain the ears. How strange, these were so lifelike. “Is that why you are mirroring so much? Reading into my body language? You should be careful what you reflect.” He said slowly as he continued to pet him. “Better it be that than unfunny.”

Curiously, he let his fingers wander up to the base of the ears, his eyes widening briefly. He had combed his nails against his scalp the whole way and found it entirely uninterrupted. Even the cuff of the ear, which he rubbed lightly between the pads of his thumb and forefingers, felt incredibly real. As if he could feel the very veins thinly veiled in flesh. 

“... Who was your plastic surgeon?” He asked as he unceremoniously tugged on the base of his ear to see if it would pull up.

[sapiosexualinformant]

nyanzaya​

(🐈) Iza gave a hum, bringing a hand to his own face, “Isn’t that interesting. Here I thought you had eyes and ears just about everywhere. Guess that isn’t true, nya? It was never my intention to catch your attention if that’s what you’re wondering.” It was the truth. Iza didn’t want Izaya’s attention per say. Of course, he always wanted someone’s attention but Izaya’s? He knew getting involved could be a good or a bad thing, right now, he wasn’t exactly sure. The feline watched how Izaya pocketed his hands and moved closer to him. 

“Oh, but you must have so many questions for me. How about for the low-low price of a few head pats? Or maybe money is more your style?” Iza’s ears twitched, tilting his head to make the bell on his collar chime before pocketing his hands to mirror Izaya.

“I can just see it so clearly that you are very skeptical.” 

This was really like a lucid dream. Perhaps he had passed out in his office again, feet up and mouth open in utter exhaustion for Namie to find later. It wasn’t totally unbelievable. Although, he may found himself disappointed if he woke up to a boring day instead of this strange distraction. He would have to weigh restlessness against the disorienting feeling of looking into a warped mirror, the just recognizable form of himself approaching himself. 

“I’m an open book, aren’t I? We all have our flaws but my flexible payment system has never been one of mine. What will a nice petting session buy me, hm?” He asked, noticing the very realistic twitching of the ears. Those must have been expensive. He hadn’t seen mechanical ones that natural looking before. 

When they were close enough, Izaya smirked as he held out a hand at eye level between the two of them, clearly expecting to have the gap closed by the other. “As a sign of good humor and faith, I’ll even pay up front.”

[sapiosexualinformant]

nyanzaya​

(🐈) Oh what an interesting turn of events. Izaya asking him for information? How cute. Then again, perhaps it was hard to believe that Iza himself wasn’t related to Izaya at all. It was merely a coincidence that they look similar. Then again with a coincidence as good at this, who wouldn’t want to know the truth?

“Eh? What’s this? You’re wanting to buy some information then? I’m charmed that you would pay for such a thing, but it is funny to me that you couldn’t find what you needed anywhere else, but for you Dear, how about I give you a discount?” Iza spoke, a soft tone of amusement, purrs were clearly laced between his words. Then again, finding information about the feline himself was hard, but not impossible. 

“What’s this? Was I supposed to be looking for you for some reason? You must have been doing a terrible job of catching my attention before now if I don’t know you.”

Now, now, this guy was clearly having a good time with this little game. Who was Izaya to not engage when he was trying to invite him into a polite match? Better this slightly offensive mystery than being bored. He was absolutely going to comb through information on himself later to try to figure out if he had missed this guy parading around with his face. It was a little rude to borrow a mask without asking, wasn’t it?

Casually, he shoved his hands in his pockets and strolled closer to his oddly customized double. 

[sapiosexualinformant]

nyanzaya​

(🐈) Hearing a sound that caught his attention, Iza couldn’t help but feel a little irritated that someone was using that method to get his attention. What he hated more was it actually worked. He turned to look at the source. His first reaction was to give a snide remark but- oh… Izaya-san. Maybe his eyes did dilate at seeing the informant, not because he liked to see them or anything like that.

Feline ears leaned forward. Seeing how Izaya seemed to be tired, ah! Even better. “Well, well, well, if it isn’t the infamous informant of Shinjuku. How would you like it if I went: ‘Info info info’ to get your attention?”

Of course it knew who he was. Well, he might as well figure it out. Whatever weird cosplayer would go this far had to have some kind of interesting reasoning for doing so. Even if it was just because he was getting paid off to distract or unsettle Izaya, you had to be fairly bold, careless, or heavily blackmailed to walk around looking like that.

“Isn’t your appearance a big sign that says info info info? You caught my attention with it, at least.”

[sapiosexualinformant]

This is what I get for pulling two all-nighters in a row again, huh? Izaya was struck dumb as he looked into the eyes of what had to be some kind of joke. Sure, he had seen plenty of photoshops of himself circulating but this? This was an entire person that looked like some weird-eyed cat parody of himself that was late for a haircut. He couldn’t decide if this was funny or not, honestly.

“... Ps ps ps.” What else was he going to do? He had to start somewhere.

@nyanzaya​