𝔠𝔬𝔪𝔢 𝔡𝔢𝔰𝔡𝔢𝔪𝔬𝔫𝔞 @sarasfm - Tumblr Blog

She’s like warm days, sunshine, honey and love.

kass.

“ I CAN’T EITHER, “ she says with a small laugh, though kass is still in shock. it’s not until they pack up all of sara’s things and begin walking towards the dorms with her that the brunette begins to RELAX, the severity of the drunken confession from earlier slowly beginning to fade. it’s hard for it not to, when sara moves around the hallway like a wannabe james bond with an empty bottle of wine, making kass unable to stop laughing. “ i think you’ll be JUST fine, “ she teases, but she means it ; if anyone could handle being at gallagher, it would be sara davies. “ HEY. “ her hands reach for sara as she loses her balance, arm wrapping around her waist for support. but then kass stops them from walking, giving her friend a long look before pulling her into a TIGHT hug. “ i’m really glad you’re here, “ she murmurs into her hair, because she’s not sure she said it before.

“ AWW, KAAASSSSS, ” sara coos as she lets herself be pulled into the tight embrace, arm wrapping around the girl’s shoulders as she does. “ i actually hate that i’m here, ” she confesses, before a chortle escapes her, barely muffled by her hand, but her tone remains unchanged, still cheery and bright despite the message of her statement. if it weren’t for the wine in her, sara wouldn’t have been so candid, kept the truth in her and let it rot until she was out of gallagher’s walls. “ but much less now that you’re here. ” there’s a newfound sway to her movements, too drunk to simply stand strong, her unstable weight dragging kass along with her as her other arm moves to circle her waist. “ way way less, i mean, who knows ! maybe i’ll even love it. ” she lets herself stay in the hug, head resting against kassandra’s, taking little steps from left to right. “ is it just me or are we slow dancing to no music ? ” sara laughs moving her head away from the crook of kass’ neck to look at her. there’s a slight quint in her eyes and a small scrunch to her nose, even as she continues to rock gently with her friend. “ i am so not a slow dancer ; may i interest you in a beyoncé routine instead ? ”

#dash: kass #( idk either she's drunk im dumb let's go w it )

rafa.

rafa nods his head as she speaks, feeling a familiar tightness in his chest as she says they can talk. despite the fact that he suggested himself, rafa has never been good at talking about his feelings, especially because he was raised in an environment where talking about your feelings never seemed like it was normal to talk about. so he doesn’t even know how this conversation is going to go. he laughs dryly as she continues, tilting his head as she gets up to get a sock. an eyebrow raises at her explanation. “interesting tactic.” he comments, a small familiar grin appearing for only what seems like a second. he almost says he thinks a text message to her roommates would have sufficed and definitely wouldn’t have raised as many eyebrows, but he decides against it. after all, she is taking the time out of her evening to just listen to him rant about his father. he breathes out something that could have been a laugh, but he doesn’t really seem to have the energy to complete. rafa takes a deep breath, his eyes shifting from the small dog to her. “but honestly, where do i even start?” he asks, but more to himself than sara. absentmindedly, he starts picking at his cuticles, a nervous habit of his before taking a deep breath. “i don’t know. i guess i’m just kind of shocked?” he says, eyebrows furrowed together as he tries to find the best way to express how exactly he is feeling. “like my father always seemed so invested in all these schools, especially blackthorne, but then he did that? it just doesn’t make any sense to me.”

SARA FEELS MORE THAN UNQUALIFIED to handle this conversation, too inexperienced with family problems of her own and far from well-versed in the world of espionage, but that doesn’t mean she won’t try. “ it’s understandable you feel that way, rafa, ” sara responds, voice soft as she slowly moves to sit beside him. “ there’s ... a lot that we don’t know about the situation, and it’s always okay to feel overwhelmed or shocked or any of those feelings. we can’t always know why people do the things they do, and it’s hard, especially when they hit too close to home. ” her response is a little vague, a little generic, and she knows, pulling validating replies from her friends’ own experiences, because how do you react to something like this ? “ i’m sorry about the unsolicited opinions, i mean, i know i’m not a therapist, but i’m always going to be here for you, okay ? ” sara gives him a smile, before her eyes move to her dog asleep on his lap and adds, “ both of us are. ” there’s a comfort being had by sara as well in this situation, sitting with someone else in the midst of all the madness, someone trusting her enough to be this open that she lets out a deep breath. “ i’m really sorry your dad’s putting you through all of this. you don’t deserve it any of it, rafa. ” she knows she hasn’t known him that long, but if he was kind enough to sit with her when it was her in his position, then she’s willing to jump the gun and make that claim. “ we’re not our parents, ” she says plainly, almost like a whisper as her own words hit her, making her rethink where she stands on some things in her life considering she’s done absolutely nothing but what they expected of her. it’s not exactly in the same wavelength, but not too different either. “ i may not have known your dad or your mom, but from what i know now ... this guy ? ” she pokes him gently in the chest, smile so bright enticing him to mirror it. “ being the absolute nicest to a strange crying girl in the library and making sure she’s okay ? being the sweetest to the world’s cutest dog ? sounds nothing like that man in the email. the resemblance starts and ends with the name, because this guy here looks more like the type of son moms would be proud to have, ” she holds his gaze, the grin on her face unwavering. “ which i’m sure she is. ”

#dash: rafa #( sara stfu challenge )

claire.

– “EXACTLY, YOU’LL GET USED TO IT,” CLAIRE KNOWS IT SOUNDS RATHER MORBID. but she hardly knows a single person here in a legacy family that doesn’t have at least ONE dead family member, come to think of it…it’s a dangerous line of work, and looking at sara…well, claire’s not quite sure she’ll be able to hack it. something in claire wants to help her; and another part of her tells her not to get overly attached to something that may be a lost cause. she has a hopelessly bad habit of getting invested in those.

“ oh, ” claire nods, “ you’re one of the computer geeks, huh? shoulda guessed. ” an arch of her brow. figures. she also has a hopelessly bad habit of getting overly attached to that major in particular. what can you do ? a soft sigh. claire can’t even imagine having notebooks as neatly as the ones sara has laid out. “ you’ll get used to it, i swear. a couple weeks in the gym – IF you’re really trying, and you’ll catch up, ” claire shrugs, “ no sweat. the professors here are really good. ” she breaks into a grin, “ you go for morning runs ? ” god, she’d die to run with someone that could keep up

“ threat elimination. ” scary as it sounds.

THE NOT-SO-SUBTLE ARCH in claire’s brow at the mention of her major does not go unnoticed, as well as the hundreds of thousands other questions running in sara’s mind about the other girl’s own specialization, but she decides to let it go, figures it’s a conversation that could be had some other time ( assuming would be another time ). right now sara’s main goal is simply to not scare the girl away with her obliviousness, to be able to mirror at least some of the spunk and grit claire seems to have in spades.

“ i do, i’m part of the track team. ” there’s a strong sense of pride in sara’s voice as she answers, grin so bright and reaching her eyes before she chuckles, correcting herself, “ in my old school, i mean. i was part of the track team in my old school. ” it feels unusual to call it her old school when it hasn’t even been a week since she left, but sara forces herself ignores it, lets claire’s voice saying “ you’ll get used to it ” ring loudly in her head, serving as a concrete reminder, urging her to do whatever it takes to survive in gallagher’s walls. “ would you maybe want to run together some time ? ” the offers comes with a smile as she looks at her, the troubles that started her breakdown already far from her mind.

“ oh, and can i ask you a question ? ” sara quickly follows, “ besides that one. ” the regret is visible on her face as soon as she says it. so much for spunk and grit. “ do you have a favorite place here in gallagher ? ”

#dash: sara

sunny.

“You’re welcome.” If she was being honest, Sunny was expecting for most of the first years to be around her age. About eighteen or nineteen. To think that there would be first years who were older was a bit of a shock. “Yeah, I get that.” There had been times when she was found crying her eyes out, most of them happened during her first semester at Gallagher. At the mentioning of the bottle, Sunny gave her a small smile. “That hasn’t stopped me before,” she told the other, admitting that she has gotten drunk before. “But I wouldn’t want it anyways.” The alcohol belonged to her, she wouldn’t take it from her. “I was doing homework, kinda lost track of time. As usual.”

GALLAGHER WAS FAR FROM TRADITIONAL, and that much was made clear from the moment sara’s mom introduced her to the idea of the school. from the coursework to the majors, everything demands adjustment. “ homework for what class ? ” sara asks knowing she’s completely out of her comfort zone when it comes to the subjects being offered, but if she wants to get settled, she has to just jump into it. “ and do you have another major ? i’m only taking advanced encryption, but i hear others have two. ”

#dash: sunny #( sorry this took so long babe )

enzo.

for such a school as prestigious as gallagher — they seemingly didn’t care to follow many laws. drinking included. or maybe they know better than to stop spies in training? that makes the most sense, but really, enzo isn’t sure what to think. mostly about the sight in front of him. “hi,” he’s shifting on his feet in what feels like the most awkward move ever, but really, the brunette has never been good with emotions … his own or others. is that such a crime? the fellow first year in front of him seems to understand, and not judge. “are you sure?” well obviously not enzo — don’t pry, idiot. the mention of caden makes the topic a bit lighter. “not — not really, but he might as well be.” the kid is closer to caden than any of his actual siblings, anyways.

THE PICTURE SIMPLY DOESN’T MAKE SENSE in sara’s head. raised in a gilded tower fed by a silver spoon, sara was accustomed to seeing kids live their lives as simply kids. eventually, she learned of the reality of life, explored the nearby countries and realized how good she has it, how different it is for ninety-nine percent of the world, but that worked for immersions, for picture books explaining economy and privilege. there are no primers for what it is like to live in the type of environment, the mentality one has to adapt and absorb when you’re being raised to be a spy. the mere idea of it still seems ludicrous to her.

as sara looks at the boy in front of her, she can’t help but see her younger siblings back at home, worry for them and for help but her remember living. “ yes, enzo, i’m sure ; thank you. ” she confirms with a light laugh, the smile on her face kind and soothing, touched by his attempts and concern. sara’s unable to keep the thoughts in her head, exhaustion and what little alcohol she drank making the words spill out before she can stop. “ funny, i feel like i should be asking you that. if i saw my little brother up this late, i’d definitely be sending him to bed. ” with a five year gap, it was unavoidable for sara to feel like the de facto big sister in the advanced encryption classes for the first years — his, sunny’s and jake’s.

#dash: enzo

micah.

micah was headed to the library to pick up his stuff. he’d left it there after dinner, his parents had called and he’d retreated back to his room for HOURS while they caught him up on everything that was happening. they never stopped talking and while he figured he should maybe find it irritating, it just made him miss them even more. he always got a little homesick, even though he felt like he was maybe too old for all of that now. he stopped abruptly at the entrance when he heard someone crying softly – at least that is what he thought it was.

“hello?” he announced himself in a hushed tone, trying not to startle whoever was in there, but also starting to get a bit freaked out. the corridors of gallagher could pretty scary at night. he turned a corner and spotted the source of the noise. “oh god–” his hand flew to his heart, “i was getting a bit spooked there.” he clocked her teary face and his face fell. “oh, hey. i am SO sorry. i didn’t mean to interrupt you… but are you okay? what’s up?” he pulled up the chair next to her and sat down, a sympathetic expression forming. “i mean, you look great – i am SUCH an ugly crier, but you still look perfect. you should see me after a romcom, god. so blotchy.”

TEARS DRY AS EASILY as they come with sara ; be it with movies or in real life, and since it never takes much to get the waterworks started, it only felt fitting that they get to end as quickly as well. “ oh my god, i haven’t made that much noise in a library in forever, ” sara responds attempting to quell her laughter at the other guy’s response, louder than she had intended. “ i’m sorry about all this, ” she gesturing to herself, already starting to feel so much calmer than a few minutes before. “ i guess i just got a little overwhelmed with everything. ” she lets the small explanation hang for a while, a small smile gracing her features as she regards the boy in front of her, simply thankful that there’s something else to think about than the ones she had prior to his arrival. “ i’m sara by the way. ” a hand extends towards him in an introduction. “ sarauniya davies, actually, but you can call me sara. i’m a first year advanced encryption major, and my favorite romcom that makes me sob twice as hard is pretty woman. ”

#dash: micah #( this got buried somewhere omg i am so sorry babe )

theboldtype-gifs

#( every WP kid ever )#muse

kass.

sara intertwines their fingers together and kass lets it happen, mostly because she can barely acknowledge the feeling of skin on skin, because she’s too busy worrying if this was the day her heart was FINALLY going to give out and beat right out of her chest. she knows she needs to be more present in this conversation, to say SOMETHING that won’t completely ruin her friendship with sara, but it’s triggering her conversation with claire only days ago, one her heart still hasn’t come close to healing from yet. is this what claire had felt like when she told her, like the air had been sucked out of her lungs ? like if she said the wrong thing, she’d crush someone important to her ? PROBABLY NOT, considering claire had said the wrong thing.

kass doesn’t realize she’s crying until she feels the silent tears rolling down her cheek, and she quickly swipes them away with her free hand. “ thank you, “ she whispers numbly, because what else is there to possibly say ? but the brunette soon starts going off about her dog and kass remembers that not only is she clearly very drunk, but they’re also in the library. “ he’s ADORABLE, “ she gives a small laugh at the picture, trying to put her heart into it. kass releases their hands together so she can wrap her arm around sara’s shoulder as she leans against her. “ c’mon, let me bring you back to your room, “ she offers softly, moving to begin packing up sara’s things. “ we’ll catch up when you’re– “ less drunk, “ feeling better. you must be exhausted. “

SARA HIT THE SWEET SPOT — all giggly and carefree as she allows herself to be swayed by the alcohol in her system. “ i can’t believe we go to the same school now, ” she laughs softly as she attempts to help kass pick her stuff up without any success. sara tries to be as little trouble as possible until they’ve left the library, following the other girl’s lead as they stand up and try to make their way to the dorms.

“ davies, ” the taller brunette utters out of nowhere as they walk out of the library, a serious, stoic expression plastered on her features. she suddenly sounds like her father, sixty and cockney, as her pace quickens. she moves ahead of kass, walking tall and as balanced as can be after a bottle of wine, before she adds, “ sara davies. ” the empty bottle in her hand is suddenly raised up, pointing forward towards an empty hallway in a pose, and she looks ridiculous, but certainly doesn’t think so. “ maybe i do have the makings of a british spy after all, ” sara comments looking back at her friend, a full-blown grin on her face as she starts to wobble again, losing her balance.

#dash: kass

rhys.

RHYS WASN’T GOOD with emotion ─ that was obvious. But that doesn’t mean he was completely oblivious to someone else’s pain. He didn’t know what prompted him to wander the campus this late at night but he wasn’t expecting to find a girl drinking her sorrows away and still showing kindness while down. It was a rarity to find someone with a soft soul like that, perhaps it affected him. Slightly. “Let me guess ─ Gallagher blues finally hitting?” He questioned lightly as he neared her. “No, embarrassing is barely making it a week here and calling your father during an emotional breakdown and him saying you were “humiliating him” and “tainting the family name”. But, of course, you didn’t hear this from me. In fact, if anyone hears of this I might have to kill you,” Rhys joked as he sat across from her. “We can talk. Or not talk. Or drink ─ whatever.”

THE SMALL JOKE OF A THREAT flies over sara’s head and thankfully so. the fact that whoever this is could actually be capable of killing her escapes her, drowned out by the comfort of having someone empathize with her at this time. “ mum’s the word, ” sara chuckles wiping at the stray tears on her cheek as she regards the other student across. “ you want to hear another humiliating thing ? ” she offers, glad at the opportunity to use humor brush off whatever it was bothering the both of them. “ it literally took me fifteen minutes to climb one flight of stairs, because my entire body is so sore right now, ” sara laughs, “ i was one grapple combo away from crying like this in awareness training class today. ” she mentions out loud for the first time just how difficult she found the rest of her classes were, and it she feels the lifted weight just by being able to talk about it. “ i’m sara, by the way. ” she introduces, holding her hand out. “ sara davies ... i’m new. ” a small giggle follows the unnecessary detail painting the obvious.

#dash: rhys

jude.

‘ then perhaps , it would have been in your best interest to choose something easier to eat . say : oatmeal ? ’ jude will offer the suggestion , but not without the sound of distaste lingering on her tongue . ‘ and we have pain relievers , and in house doctors for a reason . ’ what , was she a FIRST year or something ?

“ I’LL GET OATMEAL TOMORROW, ” sara responds easily, no trace of resistance or attitude in her voice as she smiles softly at the girl. “ i’m sorta still learning my way around campus ... it’s my third morning here. ” sara’s disposition remains bright and cheery despite the hostility. “ i love your earrings, by the way, ” she adds before turning back to her food, determined to ignore the pain for a while just to show that she actually does know how to eat it right.

#dash: jude

rafa.

at the familiar sight of the small dog, a small grin appears across rafa’s features as he bends down to scratch the dog behind his ears, “hey, bud.” rafael has appreciated the dog before, but this time he definitely helps rafa feel instantly better. he straightens back up as sara invites him in, beginning to feel like a bum when he takes into account her seemingly fancy pajamas compared to his old sweatpants and beat up hoodie. a small laugh comes out at the list of things she had gotten him, knowing that she’s just trying to cheer him up. he appreciates it, especially because he didn’t really know who else to go to after the email came out. he takes off his shoes before going to her bed, taking her up on the invitation of making himself at home. “you know, i bet you’re not even supposed to have candles,” he points out, a weak grin displayed. he knows it would just be easier for him to suggest something on netflix, but it also wouldn’t help him get through what he needs to get through. “we can talk,” he says quietly, looking over at sara as her small dog comes up on the bed and sits in his lap. “unless you really want to watch something on netflix, i don’t mind,” he laughs as he starts to pet sooty, trying his hardest to just pretend that he’s the rafa he was before the email got sent out, but he has a feeling that out of his friends, sara is going to be the one to realize it’s all a facade.

“ OH, NO, WE CAN TALK, ” sara responds almost immediately, a soft smile gracing her lips, pleased at the lack of aversion from her friend. “ this — ” she points to the corners of the bed above hers, drawing invisible lines that form a rectangle. “ — is a safe space, ” she finishes with a chuckle, moving to sit on the other side of the bed before a thought dawns on her. “ wait, give me a second. ” sara rushes to one of her drawers and pulls out a sock, and she was halfway to the door when she realized she should give an explanation before continuing. “ uhh, just in case someone were to come in, ” she flush in her cheeks are evident as she opens the door and hangs the sock on the doorknob outside. “ i’ve never had roommates before, and we haven’t really talked about it, but i think they’ll get it ? ” she tries to laugh it off while walking a little awkwardly back to the bed. “ not that we’ll be — you know, like in the movies — it’s just ... ” sara forces a deep inhale, before she rushes the next words out, determined to make less of a fool out of herself. “ it’s just so you’ll feel a little more comfortable. now the whole room is a safe space. ” she makes the same gesture she did but bigger, a full-blown grin on her face as she looks at rafa. “ i upgraded. ” she comments with a wink, before mumbling a slightly embarrassed “ sorry ” for her antics and clearing her throat. “ whenever you’re ready, raf. ”

#dash: rafa #( im officially brain dead but here )

claire.

– CLAIRE CAN TELL THAT SHE’S THROWN THE OTHER GIRL OFF A BIT. she often forgets to be sensitive around new students or first years, especially when it comes to everything they deal with at gallagher. assassins, murder…that’s all part of espionage. “ you good ? you look a little pale, ” claire laughs, “ you’ll get used to it. all of this shit is just…you know, spy stuff. no one ever said it would be easy. ” she plays it off, even though thinking of amelia hurts somewhere deep and unexpected. she doesn’t want to accept condolences; she doesn’t feel like she’s earned them, anyway. “ so, don’t worry about it. i mean, it’s fucking tragic, but…a wake up call. people die in the field. so, don’t feel like you’ve got to walk on pins and needles around me. ” funny, considering that talking to claire resembles walking through a minefield, but – of course SHE doesn’t see it that way.

“ got it, ” claire nods, “ i think there’s a couple of people around here in your boat.” she doesn’t really know what advice to give. claire feels LUCKY to be here, and is excited about the future, ever since someone picked her up at age sixteen, she’s suddenly felt chosen – like she had a purpose that she’d been searching for prior. somewhere she felt like she belonged. so, she doesn’t quite empathize with sara’s torment. “ oh, ” claire laughs. “ i’m not worried about you. ” she reaches for the bottle again. “ what’s your major ? ”

A RHYTHM EASILY SETS IN as soon the mentions of death stopped ; her conversation with claire flowing much more easily than before, and sara can only be thankful for it. “ right, just ... normal spy stuff, ” she repeats, wondering if it’ll sound less foreign on her tongue that way it does on claire the more that she says it. a part of her doesn’t it want it to, hopes instead that there’s something that could be done about it, which she knows is foolish of her, but she hopes. instead, sara files that thought away, makes a mental note to make sure to be around claire while she’s at gallagher — not to hover or bother her, but to somehow find a way to repay the kindness she’s showing sara tonight.

“ i’m a first year major in advanced encryption, ” she says with a smile, “ i ... actually already know what they’re teaching in that class which i suppose can only be good, because that means i have more time to catch up on these, ” she gestures to the opened books on her tables, colorful notes and notebooks neatly organized with them. her gen classes were interesting enough that it felt more like a literature class, requiring her the littlest effort to compartmentalize. somehow imagining it all just exists in a completely alternate universe makes it easier. “ i love studying, and this is all really fascinating. it’s more the physical stuff that’s really testing me, because i have had the physical activity limit of a beverly hills mom practically all my life : nothing more than yoga and the morning runs, ” sara jokes at her expense, finger-crossed that her weak attempt at humor would be well-received. “ what about you, claire ? what’s your major ? ”

#dash: claire

gldensvns

STARTER FOR @sarasfm

shortly after he had gotten out of a much needed shower, he saw sara’s invitation to her room, and if he’s being honest with himself, he wants her company. since she saw the email, she’ll probably be able to help him through it somehow. he quickly pulls on an old hoodie with grey sweatpants and walk out the door to her room. and soon, he’s standing right outside and knocks. “hey, it’s me,” he says, although the usual tone of confidence is missing from his voice.

sarasfm

THE GRAVITY OF THE SITUATION, the weight of that email and its contents, still hasn’t fully sunk in with sara, and truthfully, if she had a choice, she would wish it never does. having another terrifying reminder of just how helpless she is in the walls of gallagher does not entice her. sara would much rather occupy herself with other things, concern herself with other people’s situations ( objectively far worse than hers ) than ruminate in her own.

“ stay, ” sara whispers to sooty upon hearing the knocks. she moves to the door, opening it gently while staying hidden behind it, allowing her dog be the first to greet her friend, jumping off the bed to pounce on him as he entered the door. “ sooty says hi, ” she says poking her head out of the door, grin wide and bright on her face as she watches her pet’s tail wag relentlessly. “ come in, come in ! i’m, uhh, not really sure where my roommates are, so make yourself at home. ” the dorm room is uncharacteristically empty as she gestures to her bottom bunk bed. “ i have candies, crisps, and well, netflix, if that’s what you’re in the mood for. or we could talk ! i mean, we don’t have to, but that’s always an option, if you want to. ” she offers shrugging, not really sure what to say to a friend who just found out their father was part of a terrorist organization out to shut down your school. “ or you could just continue to play with that little rascal ; seems like he’s not complaining either way. ”